Hi there Canadian in China, I worked in Asia and know the story well, I had very close Chinese friends, they even refer to Chinese women that marry westerners as whores etc, and their attitude is very lousy!

I lived in Thailand for year, I refused to live in a company supplied luxury apartment, instead rented a two bed room house North of Bangkok in a village, I took house it was really small and look pleasant, but it was in a village that most people were of lower income, when I moved in after painting it etc, I greet my neighbours and told them that I by my culture, we respect our neighbour, whether you are rich pour black white etc, a neighbour is respect irrespective of colour creed etc, and for one year that I was there. not one day there was a problem, actually they were protective of me, when shopping in the local market the village people often prevented over charging and cheating, Thai culture does not bother with prejudice., I was invited to every party and wedding, and got along well.

In Thailand there huge Chinese population the last prime minister was ethnic Chinese, and there never has been any problem with Chinese, unlike Malaysia and Indonesia, Chinese are well integrated in to main population.

It be good move, if you could live there, I just could not handle the heat! Wish you the best!

Thai culture does not bother with prejudice

Really ?.....how long did you say you lived here....1 year a seasoned vetran then...

Edited December 11, 201015 yr by Soutpeel

You're likely to have more problems with other Farangs here than with the Thais.

my thoughts exactly

Thai culture does not bother with prejudice

Really ?.....how long did you say you lived here....1 year a seasoned vetran then...

Yes one year is enough, but I did not cruise around bars and brothel of Thailand or other parts of Asia, and mingled with lower depth, like some do.

Try to be positive than come here and attack every one! There are better think to do!

edited- changed my mind about posting

Edited December 11, 201015 yr by mca

Fellow Canuck here with Thai spouse. No problems but like mentioned above, it does depend on the area. The ordinary people are quite nice and friendly. However there will be certain people, Thais, expats and tourist who will automatically assume that you met her in a bar, you are a sexpat/sex tourist, she is a bar girl, the relationship is money driven etc..... Have a browse through this forum, you will see what I mean.

Light skinned chinese wife? Doubt they will assume she is "from the bar" lol. You will no problems as all - Thailand is not China, thank god.

Thai culture does not bother with prejudice

Really ?.....how long did you say you lived here....1 year a seasoned vetran then...

Yes one year is enough, but I did not cruise around bars and brothel of Thailand or other parts of Asia, and mingled with lower depth, like some do.

Try to be positive than come here and attack every one! There are better think to do!

Nice to see the rose coloured spectacles are still being worn by some people...

Not attacking anyone, mearly passing opinion based on your comment, and BTW how did bars/brothels and "lower" depth get into the dicussion, unless of course you are suggesting I frequent the bars/brothels and the "lower depths" as you so eloquently put it, whether somesbody does or doesnt has absolutely no relevance to the topic at hand

I would assume after your vast experience here, you would not speak/understand anyThai, therefore how would know that Thai culture does not bother with preduice ?

Based on my experiences here believe the opposite is actually true to a certain degree, you just have to open your ears...

Time perhaps to introduce the term 'Mia Farang' and it's usage.

I don't disagree with the core of almost everything you say Guesthouse, but if there's anything negative in this topic so far then it's been your posts. That there have been some nutcase posters in other places is not the concern of the original poster of this topic. You're just propagating their negativity into this topic.

I think you'll find attitudes in Thailand a lot more welcoming than in China - but I'll give you a caution.

Do not introduce your wife here on TV - you already have done to an extent, I'd advise you don't give any more information or discuss her any further on TV.

There's a nasty streak running through too many TV members who jump on any and every opportunity to attack other people's choice of partner - I'd advise not feeding it.

Saddened to read your caution GuestHouse. If you were not a 6000x poster with TV I would suggest you were overly cynical. Guess you have your reasons for feeling a warning needed, but (perhaps naively) I am surprised and have never noticed this 'nasty streak' on the forum.

I have been blessed to have spent 4 years with my wife of 3 years. I pray for many more. I met my sweetheart when she was selling herself in a bar to farang like me.

Let's see if the 'nasty streak' responds. I doubt it (naive again?). Many of us live in glass houses and are certainly not without sin.

IMHO.

Guess off topic. Forgive this time please.

A

I have found that my wife is treated with respect as she dresses well and speaks well ,we live amongst what i would call lower middle class Thais outside Pattaya ,buisness people and the like ,if your wife wears short skirts showing her nickers and sports lots of tattoes then they will think "bar girl" as others have said if you dress and act like a low life couple thats how you will be percieved ,but if you dress nicely are polite and treat others with respect ,then thats how you will be treated.

Hi OP,the following are just my opinions based on my experiences. I enjoy living in Zhongshan, but the worst part of living here in southern China is the pollution, the air is thick with smog, which makes it difficult spending long periods out in the open air. Also, as I dont speak Mandarin and I havent seen any Europeans here except for the occasional visitor to the company my wife works for, I feel a bit isolated. The southern Chinese are a different ethnic group, the Tai Chinese, to the Northern Han Chinese, they are smaller and have smooth skin, and are similar to the Thai people. Most Thai/Chinese are ethnicTai Chinese and they are the ethnic origins of the Indochina people. The Tai are discriminated against by the Han, and as a result to me they seem very friendly and helpfull, walking down the street they smile and say hello, (one of the few english words they all seem to know) and try to chat with me.

However, I dont feel discriminated against as I do in Thailand, then as I dont speak Mandarin or Cantonese they could be calling me all sorts of names. lol

Thailand has a xenophobic society, racism and discrimination is firmly entrenched and re-inforced by government policies. All foriegners are openly discriminated against, from the Burmese worker who gets paid half the Thai wage to Europeans who are charged up to 5 times the Thai rate for government recreation area. European Foriegners, Farrangs, are seen as second class. The are presumed to be wealthy(walking ATMs) and its normal practice to overcharge, scam, or rip off farrangs. But after you have lived there a while you accept this or become bitter. Having said this my favourite place I have lived in Asia is Northeastern Thailand, in a city called Ubon Ratchinthani. I felt welcome, safe and secure there and the locals were open and friendly. It has a moderate size expat community that have an active an inclusive social network. It is the education hub of the Northeast and boast many Universities and international schools. However, you do still feel the effects of government racist policies there.

On the subject of mixed race couples, everywhere we have been and lived we get the sideways glances and furrowed brows but never any open hostilities. We have heard comment in Thailand like, she is lucky having a farrang husband to look after her, or I wish I had a farrand husband to support me. I have also been asked many times how much I pay my wife per month, I usually reply I dont she pays me lol.

Any way these are just my experiences. I wish you all the best in your search for a happy ever after.

The one thing that concerns me is the OP's comment about having to live in a western housing compound in China.

I've found my attitude is the most important thing in regards to how I'm treated here. Some days I'm tired and short tempered, probably got a snarl on my face and growling at people. I get ignored at the market, I hear abuse shouted at me and everybody drives much, much worse than normal. It may be that none of that is actually true, and my inner fire is affecting my perception. I get the impression there are some on here like that all the time.

Other days I smile, don't rush, pause at the market and take my time to make a choice, speak in my most polite Thai and the whole world's smiling back at me. Of course, I could be a cynic and remember that of course, they're not real smiles, for all Thais hate westerners.......

But perhaps the OP should come to Chiang Mai. Plenty of ethnic Chinese, not too touristy but enough western comforts to satisfy nearly everybody and a selection of 5 or 6 international schools with various levels of fees and a choice of IB, American or British curriculum.

But it might make a change for you not drinking alone all the time eh.

Even if that were true I can't see that a lack of company would be reason enough to lower my standards.

Hi there Canadian in China, I worked in Asia and know the story well, I had very close Chinese friends, they even refer to Chinese women that marry westerners as whores etc, and their attitude is very lousy!

I lived in Thailand for year, I refused to live in a company supplied luxury apartment, instead rented a two bed room house North of Bangkok in a village, I took house it was really small and look pleasant, but it was in a village that most people were of lower income, when I moved in after painting it etc, I greet my neighbours and told them that I by my culture, we respect our neighbour, whether you are rich pour black white etc, a neighbour is respect irrespective of colour creed etc, and for one year that I was there. not one day there was a problem, actually they were protective of me, when shopping in the local market the village people often prevented over charging and cheating, Thai culture does not bother with prejudice., I was invited to every party and wedding, and got along well.

In Thailand there huge Chinese population the last prime minister was ethnic Chinese, and there never has been any problem with Chinese, unlike Malaysia and Indonesia, Chinese are well integrated in to main population.

It be good move, if you could live there, I just could not handle the heat! Wish you the best!

Thanks for the reply. What would renting a 2-bedroom house (not apartment) cost similar to the one you are talking about?

Thai culture does not bother with prejudice

Really ?.....how long did you say you lived here....1 year a seasoned vetran then...

Yes one year is enough, but I did not cruise around bars and brothel of Thailand or other parts of Asia, and mingled with lower depth, like some do.

Try to be positive than come here and attack every one! There are better think to do!

Are you saying that prejudice is usually shown in those kind of places?

FYI, ignorance is found in the lower class, prejudice is found higher up...

I am generally treated very well by Thais, but I believe the prejudice against foreigners is sort of below the surface. For instance, farang on Thai tv shows are always dishonest and sadistic. I do not recall one instance of a decent farang on Thai tv. I take songtaew every day and notice that, if the taxi is full and Thai man gets on, the Thai passengers will either make room for him or younger one will stand up and stand on platform and let Thai guy sit down. However even though I am also older man, usually I do not get same treatment. Thais do not like confrontations and try to be polite, so really there is no big problem between Thais and farang here generally and as people say, there is prejudice everywhere in the world. But keep your eyes open and you will see very often, Thai people will be very very friendly with someone, whether Thai or farang, and as soon as that person walks away they will verbally destroy same person, so even though people treat you very nicely, this not always mean there is not prejudice.

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<BR>Thai culture does not bother with prejudice

<BR><BR>Really ?.....how long did you say you lived here....1 year a seasoned vetran then...<IMG class=bbc_emoticon alt= src="http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/whistling.gif"><BR><BR>

<BR><BR>Yes one year is enough, but I did not cruise around bars and brothel of Thailand or other parts of Asia, and mingled with lower depth, like some do.<BR>Try to be positive than come here and attack every one! There are better think to do!<BR>

<BR><BR>Are you saying that prejudice is usually shown in those kind of places?<BR><BR>FYI, ignorance is found in the lower class, prejudice is found higher up...<BR>

<BR><BR><IMG class=bbc_emoticon

Edited December 11, 201015 yr by Soutpeel

But it might make a change for you not drinking alone all the time eh.

Even if that were true I can't see that a lack of company would be reason enough to lower my standards.

GuestHouse,

Love your answer, love your standards even more.

Thailand has a xenophobic society, racism and discrimination is firmly entrenched and re-inforced by government policies. All foriegners are openly discriminated against, from the Burmese worker who gets paid half the Thai wage to Europeans who are charged up to 5 times the Thai rate for government recreation area. European Foriegners, Farrangs, are seen as second class. The are presumed to be wealthy(walking ATMs) and its normal practice to overcharge, scam, or rip off farrangs.

Boy, talk about massive exaggeration and hyperbole. OP, it's nothing like this. Of course, there always seems to be that one farang who has the worst luck, all the time. The sort of guy that can walk down a crowded street and the bird will always drop the turd on him and only him. Unless you're that guy, OP, you've got nothing to worry about.

Thailand has a xenophobic society, racism and discrimination is firmly entrenched and re-inforced by government policies. All foriegners are openly discriminated against, from the Burmese worker who gets paid half the Thai wage to Europeans who are charged up to 5 times the Thai rate for government recreation area. European Foriegners, Farrangs, are seen as second class. The are presumed to be wealthy(walking ATMs) and its normal practice to overcharge, scam, or rip off farrangs.

Boy, talk about massive exaggeration and hyperbole. OP, it's nothing like this. Of course, there always seems to be that one farang who has the worst luck, all the time. The sort of guy that can walk down a crowded street and the bird will always drop the turd on him and only him. Unless you're that guy, OP, you've got nothing to worry about.

Actualy you are right, I did have a bird do his business on me, but in Thailand that is a sign of good luck, and they are right I had a large win several hours later. Again I state this is my opinion, although I dont agree with you I respect your opinion.

Think by now the OP see there are two extreme postions about the question at hand namely

Thai's cant do no wrong, rosey spectacles one type and the extreme cynics on the other side..Thai's are bigoted, xenophobes who scam all farangs

IMHO the true answer on this question sits somewhere in the middle of these two extremes

Think by now the OP see there are two extreme postions about the question at hand namely

Thai's cant do no wrong, rosey spectacles one type and the extreme cynics on the other side..Thai's are bigoted, xenophobes who scam all farangs

IMHO the true answer on this question sits somewhere in the middle of these two extremes

I also think it depends on what area you live in.

Thailand has a xenophobic society, racism and discrimination is firmly entrenched and re-inforced by government policies. All foriegners are openly discriminated against, from the Burmese worker who gets paid half the Thai wage to Europeans who are charged up to 5 times the Thai rate for government recreation area. European Foriegners, Farrangs, are seen as second class. The are presumed to be wealthy(walking ATMs) and its normal practice to overcharge, scam, or rip off farrangs.

Boy, talk about massive exaggeration and hyperbole. OP, it's nothing like this. Of course, there always seems to be that one farang who has the worst luck, all the time. The sort of guy that can walk down a crowded street and the bird will always drop the turd on him and only him. Unless you're that guy, OP, you've got nothing to worry about.

I agree Berkshire, this other guy must be one of the unlucky Westerners , as for overpricing ,never happens to us ,go to a govt recreation area ,show my drivers licence ,same price as the Thais ,in fact my familly was over recently and at a zoo i mentioned that the other westerners were my daughter and her familly and they were also charged Thai price.,for some the glass is always half empty . perhaps a change of attitude may work.?

Edited December 12, 201015 yr by thaimate

In Thailand if u walk with a foreigner, because of Thai culture, it will be assumed that u are benefiting financially. For most Thai people its incomprehensible why you would wish to be with a foreigner, other than for financial reasons.

If your wife is well educated and financially independent, then this will lessen the reaction of the Thai people you come in contact with. My Thai partner is ten years younger than I, educated overseas and is Thai Chinese. We just accept that Thai people will stare and often staff will assume its ok to be 'rude' on initial contact, or you will get the fake Thai smile which implies that you are a gullible foreigner being taken advantage of. After the initial 5 minutes, my partner's education becomes apparent and the staffs' attitude lessens.

Unfortunately too many foreigners walk around with their uneducated Thai and bring them to inappropriate restaurants, hotels etc.. This pollutes the water for the rest of us, especially when 90% of the mixed relationships in Thailand is financed based.

So the quick answer is - Yes Thai will initially assume your wife is paid for, but if she is a well educated lady, then this initial assumption will lessen.

In Thailand if u walk with a foreigner, because of Thai culture, it will be assumed that u are benefiting financially. For most Thai people its incomprehensible why you would wish to be with a foreigner, other than for financial reasons.

If your wife is well educated and financially independent, then this will lessen the reaction of the Thai people you come in contact with. My Thai partner is ten years younger than I, educated overseas and is Thai Chinese. We just accept that Thai people will stare and often staff will assume its ok to be 'rude' on initial contact, or you will get the fake Thai smile which implies that you are a gullible foreigner being taken advantage of. After the initial 5 minutes, my partner's education becomes apparent and the staffs' attitude lessens.

Unfortunately too many foreigners walk around with their uneducated Thai and bring them to inappropriate restaurants, hotels etc.. This pollutes the water for the rest of us, especially when 90% of the mixed relationships in Thailand is financed based.

So the quick answer is - Yes Thai will initially assume your wife is paid for, but if she is a well educated lady, then this initial assumption will lessen.

Wow...what a post. Are you suggesting that an uneducated Thai should not be allowed in for some food? How un-educated would they need to be? How posh the restaurant? Could they be light skinned Thais, or would they only be dark skinned Thais? Would I need the Swastika tattoo'd on my skinned off head or would it be ok on my arm? You are crass beyond belief in your attitude and statement. I hope you and your partner (of whatever description you give it ) can enjoy your, obviously, tormented life. You realy have wound me up you snob.

Many thanks for the responses, guys. I have met Thai people in many countries before and have always been impressed with their well-mannered spirit and 'smiley' nature (but things can always be different when you see another culture first hand). I don't doubt my wife and I will love Thailand, but I just wanted to hear it from people who have lived there.

Regarding China, I'm sorry if I gave any of you the impression that EVERY Chinese person is rude. That is very, very far from the truth. But many Chinese have really started to get this nationalistic vibe about them and their growing international role in the 21st century (punctuated by the Olympics and the EXPO). When I first came, a lot of the rude comments went under my radar, but now that I can speak Chinese fairly fluently I unfortunately have to tune in to the misconceptions and blatant racism that you'll hear from time to time. I think it stems from two things: (1) many Chinese feel they've been hurt time and again historically by foreign people and (2) ignorance of mainland Chinese people towards cultures outside China's borders (China's only really been open to travelers for the past thirty years, and most traveler's stick to the coastal cities).

It's mainly day-to-day things that bother us. My wife gets sexually harassed on the subway constantly (very common, beware if you plan to come here and are an Asian woman). Whack shacks everywhere (massage parlours). Chinese men will try to hit on or taunt my wife when we are out (and no, she does not dress provocatively or look like a 'bar girl', my wife says they do this because they see her as a 'traitor'). We get photographed from time to time. I'm told there is sort of an underground culture to photograph foreigners and make fun of them on the internet (but who knows). We have decided that this is not the environment we want to raise kids in, so we're going to look for something better. Japan would be great, so we're thinking of checking it out at some point, too.

Anyway, if you are planning on coming to China I would suggest you try living here for a month first. If you can afford to live in the expat compounds, you'll have no problems. Also, Chinese cities vary in temperament. I think Shanghai is probably one of the worst for the way foreign people are viewed here. Cities like Beijing (I've heard) or Hang Zhou (I know) are much more open-minded and welcoming. China is also a much better place to live in if you can't speak Chinese (weird).

i think you should grow a thicker skin.

Also, if the "whack shacks" offend you, perhaps Thailand is not your best choice.

I never encountered any problems what so ever in that regard. And that's with being here almost 10 years. Personally I find the vast majority of the allegations of Thai bigotry to be ill founded, and more often than not, a case of "the pot calling the kettle black".

I'm surprised by your bad experience in China, but every experience is personal.

Thailand, compared to China, is like a big holiday resort.

People are nice but are working for tips.

Management don't mix with guests.

If you're comfortable with that, you can have a good life here

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