Dating In Chiangmai...

[LivinLOS]

However I will concede that women who sign up for Thai Love Links are probably representative of Thai women who have some grasp of English and are eager, if not desperate, to find a financially secure man who will take care of them. I simply maintain that these women do not represent all Thai women.

No but they do represent a far larger part of the population than in many other countries..

The concept of being a gold digger or to value a partner by their net worth seems to be accepted or at most not have such large negative connotations. In the west mothers want their daughters to marry a doctor or a lawyer.. Here they dont care, just so long as hes rich.

[ianf]

join the right circle and you find the right relationship .

drop by a ah go go bar or a bar beer and you be ready to have a roller coaster ride

just what i feel .

good girl do not hang out at disco at 1-2 am and go home with you . when you are half drunk .

Good girl will be sleeping before 12 am . like cinderela whahhahahahha

Good girl usally do not end up with a divorced man in their 30s .

just my view . maybe you looking for a good woman .

Not entirely true. My good girl ended up with me, a twice-divorced 50+ farang. What's more she is an intelligent human being with a high set of morals and has never seen the inside of a bar. In other words, there are some nice girls out there ......

[WinnieTheKhwai]

She's never seen the inside of a bar.. that sounds like a very sheltered life to me. My wife has seen the inside of a bar as recently as New Year's eve.

[ianf]

She's never seen the inside of a bar.. that sounds like a very sheltered life to me. My wife has seen the inside of a bar as recently as New Year's eve.

I think you know what I meant.

[ThaiPauly]

Off Topic posts and their replies to them deleted.

This is a Thai Forum, not a Fillipino one.

Please keep the dicussion focused on Thailand please

Thank you

[vspin134]

My friend is finally here...he had a blinddate from online website with some girl in Chiangmai last night...he didnt like her i guess those pic and personality on those site cannot be reliable source. I felt sorry for him he flew all the way from Bangkok with me and i put him in boutique hotel on Niman to meet a girl but thing turned down hill.

Your "friend" sounds like a dream boat! Fact is he could be a right mingier and still do more doggy than an shepherd from Wales, (working the lonely night shift) I'm not too sure about how much love action he'll get as a Canadian…….Tell him to say he's Israeli, that will up his chances) Tell him to start saving his money for the trip. Love don't come cheap here. All the girls and women here are lovely, from Hi-so to bar girls. By all means tell him he can give them his heart; just don't give them his wallet or bank details. Most of the time it's "pay to play" (so my wife keeps telling me) so if he wants to try out page 68 of the karma sutra, it's going to cost him. Good luck...........To your friend, I mean.

[IanForbes]

Now let me see; where would I go to find a lovely Thai woman?

I was at a VERY popular night club near Nimmenhamen last night. I think it's called the Infinity. It was packed with young Thai people dancing, listening to the band and drinking. There might have been a thousand people of which I couldn't see any other farangs but myself. At least half or more were petty, young Thai females. If that isn't a big enough selection to choose from then I wouldn't know what more to say. And, there is another night club just a block away... also full. By contrast, the lady bars along Loi Kroh road were mostly empty.

Just get out and explore a bit. There's nothing to lose if you are pleasant to everyone. If you are looking for love then just go with the flow. Let it happen. You seldom get anywhere by forcing anything. And, as someone already mentioned, love will just find you in the most unexpected way.

[jayjay0]

Given all the advice here, adding it up, it is clear that your friend is not in the best position to be successful in his quest - if it is an honest one.

A. He has insufficient time to learn Thai.

B. He is in some degree "walking wounded" and not on his best balance.

C. He is a man of two cultures (to this or that degree) and wishes to engage a third in a permanent relationship.

However, there is a way to surmount these conditions if they apply, and other difficulties too. He should attend the Christian churches of Chiang Mai. Of course, many services are conducted in Thai, but there are those in English as well, attended by Thai women. And he must be pro-active, attending every moment that an opportunity arises. There may as well be "do-gooder" organizations involving Thai women who speak some English (or French - you never know with Canadians).

Or hire someone for a month and take his next vacation in India. Bad marriage or not, if he cannot find affinities in Canada, he'll have better luck in India. Not incidentally, it is true that Thai people have a "thing" against the people of India. Sadly, we all seem to need to look down on somebody and India is right down there with Cambodians or Hill Tribe people (political and whom do you want to marry). Go figure.

Note that though we hear of and see enduring relationships between foreign males and Thai women all the time here, they are rarely based on equals in education and income. Also, as has been mentioned, one never marries a woman, from whatever walk of life, without marrying her family, lock, stock, and the barrel too.

Finally, I would not become involved, if I were you. Has catastrophe written on it, though the romantic wishes him luck.

I think what he is applies to all three A,B, and C. i am not sure if he knows what he is getting himself into...he sure is a nice guy who is quite successful in his career but just no luck with woman thats all. As i mentioned earlier he has been through a rough divorce so ow what he is looking at just a simple life with good relationship.

I agree. What really jumped out for me was

"Note that though we hear of and see enduring relationships between foreign males and Thai women all the time here, they are rarely based on equals in education and income. Also, as has been mentioned, one never marries a woman, from whatever walk of life, without marrying her family, lock, stock, and the barrel too."

Describes my five year relationship to a tee. I don't even try to describe to her what I did for a living she would never believe it. LOL And I now have a Thai family.

Life is good I came to Thailand for a month holiday and found a perfect mate for me and I wasn't even looking. I am a firm believer that when a person is ready they will find there partner. Most people do not wait and then wonder what went wrong.

I speak from personal experience on that two wrong one's.

[CMX]

"...young Thai people dancing, listening to the band and drinking. There might have been a thousand people of which I couldn't see any other farangs but myself. At least half or more were petty, young Thai females. If that isn't a big enough selection to choose from then I wouldn't know what more to say." ~ IanForbes

I find that the irrepressible Mr. Forbes has made what we might call a Freudian slip, or perhaps an honest one, in his advice. If you're interested in finding a petty woman (who likes drinking and dancing too!), come to Thailand! He continues to inform us that such women are all around us, so if we are led where we usually are by the usual organs, we may well marry one! Chances are good!

[uptheos]

He continues to inform us that such women are all around us, so if we are led where we usually are by the usual organs, we may well marry one! Chances are good!

Nah....all TV posters met their wives in church.

[ChiangMaiFun]

"...young Thai people dancing, listening to the band and drinking. There might have been a thousand people of which I couldn't see any other farangs but myself. At least half or more were petty, young Thai females. If that isn't a big enough selection to choose from then I wouldn't know what more to say." ~ IanForbes

I find that the irrepressible Mr. Forbes has made what we might call a Freudian slip, or perhaps an honest one, in his advice. If you're interested in finding a petty woman (who likes drinking and dancing too!), come to Thailand! He continues to inform us that such women are all around us, so if we are led where we usually are by the usual organs, we may well marry one! Chances are good!

As Elvis once said 'why buy a cow when you can get milk through the fence'!

[bully]

This 100% free datingsite link is very OK, if someone is not too naieve you easy find a good girl here, usual the Thai girls are OK.

I found my Philippine gf via this one, and 2 years ago a very good Thai gf too. Now it's my social networksite where I meet some online friend m'f, I know several happy marriages via this site. I'm not related just a long time user.

It's in my bookmarks

[bully]

here's my (cynical) take:

1. remember you are a walking ATM

2. don't forget that if you cannot get a girl in your own country - you can here - but at a price!

3. Thais view relationships in a more 'practical way' than farangs - what's love got to do with it? (apologies Tina)

4. you are number 10 behind:

their family

their bank account

their gik

their second gik

their friends

their dog

their car

their job

their clothes

and then maybe you (if you find a good one)

and remember the translation problem?

they say/it means

honey I miss you / can i have some money

you are the only one for me / apart from my gik

where have you been honey / I need money

i love you / i love your bank account

you are so handsome / i am short of cash

honey can i bring a friend / can you pay for both of us

i'm feeling sick and cannot come tonight / my gik is visiting town

i have never met anyone like you before / none of my giks have ever had any money

I only like farangs / only they have money

I broken heart / and broken bank account

A bit tongue in cheek but you get the drift? everything here is an 'exchange' i know many farangs who are happy with their Thai girl - often 20 or 30 years apart... must be love right? well it may be... love Thai style

GREAT AND REALISTIC POST, I DO FULLY AGREE AFTER 20 YEARS IN PARADISE :jap:

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I hadn't seen that post yet. What an incredibly sad thing to read.

here's my (cynical) take:

1. remember you are a walking ATM

2. don't forget that if you cannot get a girl in your own country - you can here - but at a price!

3. Thais view relationships in a more 'practical way' than farangs - what's love got to do with it? (apologies Tina)

4. you are number 10 behind:

their family

their bank account

their gik

their second gik

their friends

their dog

their car

their job

their clothes

and then maybe you (if you find a good one)

and remember the translation problem?

they say/it means

honey I miss you / can i have some money

you are the only one for me / apart from my gik

where have you been honey / I need money

i love you / i love your bank account

you are so handsome / i am short of cash

honey can i bring a friend / can you pay for both of us

i'm feeling sick and cannot come tonight / my gik is visiting town

i have never met anyone like you before / none of my giks have ever had any money

I only like farangs / only they have money

I broken heart / and broken bank account

A bit tongue in cheek but you get the drift? everything here is an 'exchange' i know many farangs who are happy with their Thai girl - often 20 or 30 years apart... must be love right? well it may be... love Thai style

GREAT AND REALISTIC POST, I DO FULLY AGREE AFTER 20 YEARS IN PARADISE :jap:

[seekingfriends]

So, this is for an Indian looking guy right? Objectively speaking, I'd say that's going to be a tough sell.

The Indian part is no problem, it`s the Canadian half that concerns me.

Couldn`t the man say he is a Brit, Aussie, American or something? This may increase his chances.

That was a good one.

i dont like his chances of picking up a thai girl . most thais say up front that they are not interested in indian guys .or arab . sorry but that is life. he is better looking at a bride from india, james

[ChiangMaiFun]

I hadn't seen that post yet. What an incredibly sad thing to read.

here's my (cynical) take:

1. remember you are a walking ATM

2. don't forget that if you cannot get a girl in your own country - you can here - but at a price!

3. Thais view relationships in a more 'practical way' than farangs - what's love got to do with it? (apologies Tina)

4. you are number 10 behind:

their family

their bank account

their gik

their second gik

their friends

their dog

their car

their job

their clothes

and then maybe you (if you find a good one)

and remember the translation problem?

they say/it means

honey I miss you / can i have some money

you are the only one for me / apart from my gik

where have you been honey / I need money

i love you / i love your bank account

you are so handsome / i am short of cash

honey can i bring a friend / can you pay for both of us

i'm feeling sick and cannot come tonight / my gik is visiting town

i have never met anyone like you before / none of my giks have ever had any money

I only like farangs / only they have money

I broken heart / and broken bank account

A bit tongue in cheek but you get the drift? everything here is an 'exchange' i know many farangs who are happy with their Thai girl - often 20 or 30 years apart... must be love right? well it may be... love Thai style

GREAT AND REALISTIC POST, I DO FULLY AGREE AFTER 20 YEARS IN PARADISE :jap:

it's a bit of fun Winnie but it's generally (ish) true - Thai's are incredibly 'practical' when it comes to errrrr 'love' - no one really believes that that incredibly beautiful young 20 something with that over weight 60s farang would 'love' him if she had a choice? still if they are happy so what? but I am pretty realistic I think

[amexpat]

Pretty pathetic, I think. I hope things get better for you.

[Ulysses G.]

it's a bit of fun Winnie but it's generally (ish) true - Thai's are incredibly 'practical' when it comes to errrrr 'love' - no one really believes that that incredibly beautiful young 20 something with that over weight 60s farang would 'love' him if she had a choice?

Yes, but from what I have seen, by the time they are 30 and starting to look run down, they often have formed a genuine affection for the old guy.

Edited March 4, 2011 by Ulysses G.

[rakchaingmai]

I hadn't seen that post yet. What an incredibly sad thing to read.

here's my (cynical) take:

1. remember you are a walking ATM

2. don't forget that if you cannot get a girl in your own country - you can here - but at a price!

3. Thais view relationships in a more 'practical way' than farangs - what's love got to do with it? (apologies Tina)

4. you are number 10 behind:

their family

their bank account

their gik

their second gik

their friends

their dog

their car

their job

their clothes

and then maybe you (if you find a good one)

and remember the translation problem?

they say/it means

honey I miss you / can i have some money

you are the only one for me / apart from my gik

where have you been honey / I need money

i love you / i love your bank account

you are so handsome / i am short of cash

honey can i bring a friend / can you pay for both of us

i'm feeling sick and cannot come tonight / my gik is visiting town

i have never met anyone like you before / none of my giks have ever had any money

I only like farangs / only they have money

I broken heart / and broken bank account

A bit tongue in cheek but you get the drift? everything here is an 'exchange' i know many farangs who are happy with their Thai girl - often 20 or 30 years apart... must be love right? well it may be... love Thai style

GREAT AND REALISTIC POST, I DO FULLY AGREE AFTER 20 YEARS IN PARADISE :jap:

I'm loving this post it really gave me a good laugh today.

but it's kinda true in a way .

I have been in a relationship for 7 years with a thai women and i have no money so there is an exception to the rule i'm 31 years old and have been together since i was 24 but she is older then me by 6 years maybe that has something to do with it.

[KRS1]

join the right circle and you find the right relationship .

drop by a ah go go bar or a bar beer and you be ready to have a roller coaster ride

just what i feel .

good girl do not hang out at disco at 1-2 am and go home with you . when you are half drunk .

Good girl will be sleeping before 12 am . like cinderela whahhahahahha

Good girl usally do not end up with a divorced man in their 30s .

just my view . maybe you looking for a good woman .

we know that good gal/woman dont hang out at the pub at midnight...and he is not looking those short term or over night relationship. He and I made mistakes we ended out with wrong relationship...we were young and didnt think right to choose a girl but now what we are looking for are good gal to spend out remaining life with regardless education nor line of work she is in.

My biggest criteria is the number of siblings.

[uptheos]

I have been in a relationship for 7 years with a thai women and i have no money so there is an exception to the rule i'm 31 years old and have been together since i was 24 but she is older then me by 6 years maybe that has something to do with it.

Maybe you're just an irresistible dude.

[ChiangMaiFun]

it's a bit of fun Winnie but it's generally (ish) true - Thai's are incredibly 'practical' when it comes to errrrr 'love' - no one really believes that that incredibly beautiful young 20 something with that over weight 60s farang would 'love' him if she had a choice?

Yes, but from what I have seen, by the time they are 30 and starting to look run down, they often have formed a genuine affection for the old guy.

That IS true... I have seen it too - but it is as you say and their options are more limited 30+

Please don't let anyone read into this any criticism - just observation and reflection - it's all an 'exchange' - and why not?

[powderpuff]

Rule Number 1 in Thailand. You never lose your girl you simply lose your turn. Lather rinse repeat.

[uptheos]

it's a bit of fun Winnie but it's generally (ish) true - Thai's are incredibly 'practical' when it comes to errrrr 'love' - no one really believes that that incredibly beautiful young 20 something with that over weight 60s farang would 'love' him if she had a choice?

Yes, but from what I have seen, by the time they are 30 and starting to look run down, they often have formed a genuine affection for the old guy.

That IS true... I have seen it too - but it is as you say and their options are more limited 30+

Please don't let anyone read into this any criticism - just observation and reflection - it's all an 'exchange' - and why not?

True, it's all exchange everywhere, it's just that in the west we do it differently......but you don't get something for nothing.

[asiaworld]

There is a GOOD reason why most foreign men wind up with hookers. That's because it's easy and where many of the pretty gals hang out.

I don't know what kind of people you know but none of my 'foreign men' friends have wound up with a hooker.

Just thought of a wise joke.. A man approaches a woman on the street, and asks..Let me know hypothetically would you spend a night with a guy like George Cloony for a million bucks?. Well woman pauses /for a mil../ hypothetically, guess i would ... And with me for 20? man asks.. WHo the hell do you think i am woman replies! Well by now we've figured out WHO you ARE, all whats left is to agree on the price

Anyways IMHO OP's friend is the disaster in making .. Some man just refuse to learn from their own mistakes, just hope his future quests will turn out less disastrous, than his previous one did !

[TheFishman1]

hi all...got a friend who looks to know a decent girl/woman in Chiangmai. He is indian Canadian and will visit CM next month and wants to hook up with someone for good relationship...he has been broken -hearted by another thai girl he dated a year ago. Not sure if this is the place to ask about this... (he is late 30s divorced and lives in Canada who travel frequently to Thailand for business LOL so the Indian Canadian has to travel around the world to find a lady,can't find one in Thailand LOL I was travelling once in either Central America or South America I guy asked me you know the differences from a wife and a whore? I answered a whore you pay as you go and a wife you pay for the rest of your life.Just kidding but this is hilarious.LOL Communication is good but I think Cash is always King

[slapout]

Fish; There is topic (since yesterday) about a Thai lady down south who seems to be attracted to those of Indian background. Her name with address were published in the local news and thus onto the TV forum. You might want to check that out for your friend.

[yesterday]

Couldn`t the man say he is a Brit, Aussie, American or something? This may increase his chances.

That was a good one.

i dont like his chances of picking up a thai girl . most thais say up front that they are not interested in indian guys .or arab . sorry but that is life. he is better looking at a bride from india, james

"chances of picking up a Thai girl" ... sure the Thai girls are some of the the most discreminating of people ....

absolutely rediculous.... we all need to laugh so keep your funnies coming!

[yesterday]

it's a bit of fun Winnie but it's generally (ish) true - Thai's are incredibly 'practical' when it comes to errrrr 'love' - no one really believes that that incredibly beautiful young 20 something with that over weight 60s farang would 'love' him if she had a choice?

Yes, but from what I have seen, by the time they are 30 and starting to look run down, they often have formed a genuine affection for the old guy.

By the time they are 30 and run down?? Is this a joke? What type of Thai girl do you mean exactly?

"Run down at 30".... maybe for this type of Thai girl it would be a genuine affection for the 30-50,000 a month forked over and not much more.

[wolf5370]

OK quite depressing reading in this thread for the poor guy! I think there is a lot of bitterness, a lot of generalising based on small poll groups and a lot of regurgitation (I always tend to suspect some poster have no real experience or knowledge, but simply repeat/reword some other guy's views - bitterness and all).

I have a suggestion for the guy. Most (what is generally termed here as...) "nice girls" find their partners through family or work - like everyone else in the world probably. In the big cities, girls are more modern and much more like their western equivalents in as much that they go to bars and clubs in groups (mixed or otherwise) - not so much out of town. As he is here for just a few weeks, it is very unlikely he will meet someone through family or work (as in colleague not customer!).

So, my suggestion is to make friends in his own country (Canada) with some Thais - at his local restaurant if its small and family run, at a local Thai temple/Buddhist centre (I have often met non-Buddhist helping out at the temples I visited and frequented in the UK - England ad Scotland - for example - one friend I made was with a 40ish Indan Muslim who helped out in the Buddhist temple several times a week - he liked the peacefulnes, real friendship and lack of people pushing religion in his face! - his words, roughly - never saw him hit on anyone either). They will have family in Thailand.

I grew up in the UK - my best friend throughout my school life was a Thai. I was entwined in semi-Thai culture since I was a young kid - and even though I live here in CM, I still have many Thai friends over there in the UK. When I was there, and when I MSN them, I often get asked to recommend a "nice farang boy" (see it works both ways!) for family members of all ages (and I ain't kidding - I have had requests for teen agers right up to divorced sisters in there 60's). When I meet up with new Thai people back in the UK (say when I go to a temple there and chat with a monk I know - always makes the Thais notice "Long Pee knows that farang!" - or a restaurant with friends where almost always someone knows one of the staff - or owners - I used to own a Thai restaurant in the UK, so hung out with other Thai/Chinese restauranters and staff, so circle is much smaller) after I get to known them a bit (a few hours say) they almost invariably show me pictures or chat about some niece or other in Thailand somewhere ask if I am married (in which case I get the "nice friend"/brother question).

What I am saying is that if he puts the time and work in at home, and is liked, he will get those all important family recomendations - often ladies who have little chance of meeting a farang (and perhaps not even thought about it). They will also then have someone (family) in your own country when they get there - and all the better if they already respect you! - and as locals, can help her with her culture shock.

There are also a lot of abandoned women here (and widows) with kids that want to find anyone to love them - they are not all poor either! (or in the sex trade!) - many have their own businesses or good jobs.

On a separate subject - a lot of attacking Thai women who can speak English to some fair degree. This is as prejudiced as the accusations placed on them for their (generalised) skin colour preference. Many Thai women learn English for their jobs. Many jobs demand English and are NOT in the sex trade! There are also a lot of Thai English teachers too!