Farang Men/thai Girlfriends -what's The Thai View?

[ray23]

Hold on there siamone you got the wrong idea. I wasn't talking about me in particular. It seems like you are paranoid, angry, frustrated by your reactions. Can't handle criticism? Were you so offended cause you it applied to you? Was it true what I said? Obviously it was cause you got so emotional about it. Or what? Was my post slightly meant to be slightly sarcastic. Hold on there easy. Relax. You don't have to get so emotional by a 19 year old teenie over the internet.

The poster asked a thai opinion. Now he got one and everyone is flaming. Wow!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

oh dear Fanta, I did not know you were criticising me...I just picked up on what you were saying about yourself. But apparently you were not, so I am wrong to think that of you. Where did you get all those thoughts then?? must have been in your head, I think.

No, I was not angry, just amazed at your remarks. Never mind, I hope you already have a nice g/f.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Just a thougth what makes anyone think that the 50 year old guys didn't go through a period of life when the belly didn't sag and the wallet wasn't full.

We all go through times in our lives where we don't have the best of the ladies on our arms, no matter where we came from. We all had times when we did, no matter what the money situation, that is just life.

Does any Thia believe that millionares in the foriegn countries can't have the beautiful little ladies hanging if the want them. Nothing different really, rich Thia guys have as many young beautiful women as they want.

That kind of thing has little to do with the color of yor skin, your heritage or your value in life. They have everything to do with money and as long as everyone understands that and both are happy up 2 them.

The foriegners come here and play with the bar girls, in Udon there is a thriving prostitution business in houses. These are Thai places and many more of them then are those catering to foriegners. These girls are mainly Lao, maybe 18 maybe not. So just think are the Thai men any different then foriegners. Yes in one way they would never be seen in public with those girls.

So I think the Thai guys have the best of the two worlds and really have very little to jealous of foriegn men of.

They do the same things a foriegn men do, they just don't do it publicly.

[bendix]

As with most questions posted on this excellent forum, there is no easy answer that is right or wrong. Everything is a shade of gray.

Having said that, I suspect there is an undercurrent of resentment somewhere - my experience of Thailand is that most bad feelings simmer below the surface but that Thais' innate politeness prevents it from being expressed too openly.

A picture.

TGF and I were enjoying a fruit shake at JJ Market a few weekends ago, watching the crowds wander by. A few feet away a few young Thai guys were busking - they are regulars there. They were talking in Thai and TGF was looking increasingly uncomfortable. It seems they were making pointed comments to the effect that so many Thai girls want a farang BF these days that there will be no girls left for them.

[bendix]

As a Thai man, responding to the topic, I DON"T feel bother by farang+thai lady abit.

It's a normal thing here...  I believes it had a lot to do with our culture.

Of course, we think all farangs are rich. You have to understand most of Thai people are poor. It's a good thing if you have a farang husband because financially your life will be better.  I'm sure some of your money are going toward her family and their lives are better because of you. Traditionally, when we are grown up, Bangkok is where go to works and send some money home to our family. If you have a farang husband you might not even have to work and beable to send some money home. I mentions a lot about the money, but this doesn't means your wife doesn't love you and not all Thai married you because of your assets. I'm sure some farangs might wonder about interracial in Thailand, because where you came from the culture is different. 

We don't have racial problem here in Thailand. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

We don't have a racial problem here in Thailand?

Now that is funny.

[richard10365]

I think wanting something nice from someone else has is a normal feeling. It just means your human.

People, property, education, and sometimes citizenship are things some people are envious of.

When it comes to women, I think it is a normal feeling of any race to notice the ethnic diversity between a mixed couple. If mixed couples are something they are not use to seeing then some might have a first impression of a look of disapproval.

Some might have had a bad expierence with a farang in the past and now stereotype all farangs/thai couples from then on.

Sometimes I do run across people who see my Thai wife and I together in the village and they give us the look of disapproval. Usually, I respond with the traditional wai, say sa wat dee krup, and their frown usually becomes a smile.

[muldoon]

Being quarter thai I can say that my view is, whatever makes you happy mate.

Edited September 8, 2005 by muldoon

[dereklev]

As a Thai man, responding to the topic, I DON"T feel bother by farang+thai lady abit.

It's a normal thing here...  I believes it had a lot to do with our culture.

Of course, we think all farangs are rich. You have to understand most of Thai people are poor. It's a good thing if you have a farang husband because financially your life will be better.  I'm sure some of your money are going toward her family and their lives are better because of you. Traditionally, when we are grown up, Bangkok is where go to works and send some money home to our family. If you have a farang husband you might not even have to work and beable to send some money home. I mentions a lot about the money, but this doesn't means your wife doesn't love you and not all Thai married you because of your assets. I'm sure some farangs might wonder about interracial in Thailand, because where you came from the culture is different. 

We don't have racial problem here in Thailand. 

You may not have racial problems with Farangs here but you most certainly have a Thai on Thai racial problem.

The Chinese Thai and the rich Thai from Krung Thep most certainly look down on the people of Isaan and the South of Thailand.

I am not saying all Chinese or rich Thai are like that but the majority are.

Just look at the way your country is run on a "Jobs for the Boys" basis. It is your connections that get you a good job not your ability. Nepotism and racism are rife here.

Why do you think that sales of whitening creams run into billions of Baht a year, purchased by people who can ill afford them. It is not because "White is Beautiful", it is so these ladies are not instantly recognisable as being from the poor parts of Thailand.

Forgive my rant, it is just my 2 satangs worth and I know it is

[The Dude]

So many farang men (me included) walking around with Thai girlfriends - I get the impression most of the Thais don't care but is there not an underlying feeling of us coming over and stealing their women? There must be a certain degree of resentment, right?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yes I think there is some resentment among some of the younger Thai lads I seen it a few times in villages in Isaan where x boy friends have turned up drunk at peoples homes and try and start a fight with farang men over X girl friends.

I have a problem at the moment with a ex bar girl who is married to a farang running around the village telling people I slept with her and I think it is just a case of her been jelous of what me and the missus have accomplished. And me being 20 years younger than her husband. Thank god the missus doesn,t beleive her otherwise I could have realy been in the shit.

I guess you got to put up with things like that when you are young Aussie stud

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Why would a young aussie stud want to throw it all away and get married so soon?

[a2396]

I dont think its a "falang" thing, the Number 1 thing i see is Thais are jealous of $$$$.

(Especially the Thai-Chinese.)  I see it everyday, thais sizing up everyone money-

wise.

  So they see you with a falang they instantly think "She with falang, #### she hit the lottery!" and

become envious.

  Its ALL about money here  MONEY MONEY MONEY

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Unfortunately, I think you are correct about this. It is true with a lot of relationships, but not all. I have found some Thais quite sincere and honest and not about money. The problem becomes more obvious when you are involved with a romantic situation.

[The Dude]

As a Thai man, responding to the topic, I DON"T feel bother by farang+thai lady abit.

It's a normal thing here...  I believes it had a lot to do with our culture.

Of course, we think all farangs are rich. You have to understand most of Thai people are poor. It's a good thing if you have a farang husband because financially your life will be better.  I'm sure some of your money are going toward her family and their lives are better because of you. Traditionally, when we are grown up, Bangkok is where go to works and send some money home to our family. If you have a farang husband you might not even have to work and beable to send some money home. I mentions a lot about the money, but this doesn't means your wife doesn't love you and not all Thai married you because of your assets. I'm sure some farangs might wonder about interracial in Thailand, because where you came from the culture is different. 

We don't have racial problem here in Thailand. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Good job there thai dude; what's amazing is the #s of posters that will deny that wealth had anything at all to do in their relationship with their thai wife/or gf. What a load of bunk they peddle

[a2396]

My mother has a really dislike for foreign people in Thailand. I think she dislikes farang married to thai girls too. I'm not sure about this subject though, because she never wants to talk about it. Also she doesn't want me to bring up the subject, she always get angry or irritated at me. I think thai people just don't want to say their true opinion.

30 year old farang married with a 30 year old girl? No problem. "George Clooney" married with a 25 year old girl? Still not a real big deal. 50 year old unemployed janitor married with a 18 year old girl? That's not right. I see the later very often in thailand.

How do you know what is true love? There are alot of gay people married to women and have a "happy family with kids". Just to cover up that they are gay. When I see a bald, large guy with tattoos all over his body, I can safely say he's a typical english hooligan. How can you thai girls dig this type of men? He is always angry and always yelling. He always drinks and doesn't have a good background. Do thai girls like that? Noway would a goodlooking western female marry with this guy. How did he get this hot asian girl then? Btw not all foreigners are like that so don't flame me. But I think most are.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

There are plenty of beautiful western women attached to no good boyfriends - pimps, drug dealers, jackass jerks, etc. Where to find the most beautiful, sexiest women in USA? In the strip clubs. What kind of boyfriends/husbands they have - GUESS? It is not the preacher boy. WHY?

[SiamOne]

Good job there thai dude; what's amazing is the #s of posters that will deny that wealth had anything at all to do in their relationship with their thai wife/or gf. What a load of bunk they peddle

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

why is it amazing?? if they feel that the amount of money they had, or did not have, was not pertinent, why should you question that?

maybe, in your experience, money has always come into your relationships, well, that's your life, not theirs. You cannot hope to know and judge other peoples lives.

I know that it did not influence me, so why cannot others have the same feelings.

[The Dude]

The dude feels that in 95% or more of thai/farang relationships that cash was a major factor somewhere along the line. Thems pretty good odds dudes. Furthermore, the dude also feels that 95% of the dudes who claim to be in the 5% category above are living in pipe dreams. Who can dig what the dude is saying?

Edited September 8, 2005 by The Dude

[Rumpole]

Of course, we think all farangs are rich. You have to understand most of Thai people are poor.

Here we go. The perennial Thai plea of poverty. Suggest you take a stroll through the staff or student car park of your nearest university to see how some of these "poor" Thais spend their money. Or talk to "poor" people working for medium or larger sized companies and ask them how much they earn.

We don't have racial problem here in Thailand. 

I can't believe this comment. Thailand is one of the most xenophobic, racist places I have ever lived - much of it government-sanctioned or even government-initiated. Even if the racism is not always vocalized or otherwise expressed, it simmers beneath many of the fake smiles.

Edited September 8, 2005 by Rumpole

[Canadian-Jesse]

You're all talking about old dudes with Thai girls...

What about young guys like me? 19 year old tall blonde/blue eyed guys coming over for vacations and getting ladies?

How do you feel about that?

[BambinA]

You're all talking about old dudes with Thai girls...

What about young guys like me? 19 year old tall blonde/blue eyed guys coming over for vacations and getting ladies?

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Q -How do you feel about that?

A -it depends on

1 how is you act ?

2 how is the girl acts?

3 where is the place that both of you hang around ?

[Heng]

Not all falangs of course, but it appears many are more than willing to marry women who are divorced, have children from previous marriages -both Thai and falang- (and even better yet often have no issues of taking care of these children as their own), and have worked as prostitutes. This in itself is good for Thai society. It's an extra level of social net in a society where the family net doesn't cover everyone.

[mpdkorat]

How do you know what is true love? There are alot of gay people married to women and have a "happy family with kids". Just to cover up that they are gay. When I see a bald, large guy with tattoos all over his body, I can safely say he's a typical english hooligan. How can you thai girls dig this type of men? He is always angry and always yelling. He always drinks and doesn't have a good background. Do thai girls like that? Noway would a goodlooking western female marry with this guy. How did he get this hot asian girl then? Btw not all foreigners are like that so don't flame me. But I think most are.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think a lot of these girls do not have much of a choice if they wish to have a little money in their lives. The alternative for them is to get a Thai guy who drinks too much shouts a lot, always angry and regularly beats his GF/wife up. That is why a lot of these girls prefer the farangs; they are much safer to be with. The farangs are also less likely to have a mia noi too. Not all Thai guys are like that, but most are.

[Boo]

Not all Thai guys are like that, but most are. 

Had many relationships with thai guys then have you?

[Mighty Mouse]

Most women ( of all nationalities) regard husbands as a status symbol.

A fat, ugly and smelly farang on the arm of a young Thai women is still a symbol of some kind...perhaps a lot better than not having a man at all.

If other Thai women look down upon a couple in a mixed race relationship, it would mainly be because their own husbands are regarded as higher status symbols.

[Morden]

You're all talking about old dudes with Thai girls...

What about young guys like me? 19 year old tall blonde/blue eyed guys coming over for vacations and getting ladies?

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

As a matter of fact, young chap, I feel OK about it because I've been there and done it. If you're very lucky, one day you'll be an old dude too. Those muscles will have wasted a bit and your skin will hang loose. Your mind will have the same desires but will be many times wiser. You're body will want the same things and you'll feel that you're entitled to have them as much as the next person. If you're very lucky, that is.

How do you feel about that?

[Tyree D.]

never experienced resentment. only encouragement and ego boosts.

[Tyree D.]

You're all talking about old dudes with Thai girls...

What about young guys like me? 19 year old tall blonde/blue eyed guys coming over for vacations and getting ladies?

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

As a matter of fact, young chap, I feel OK about it because I've been there and done it. If you're very lucky, one day you'll be an old dude too. Those muscles will have wasted a bit and your skin will hang loose. Your mind will have the same desires but will be many times wiser. You're body will want the same things and you'll feel that you're entitled to have them as much as the next person. If you're very lucky, that is.

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I've got the Canadian guy beaten! I was a 19 year old student here. Lost my virginity in Indonesia on the way to Thailand. And I'm Black, too! Lots of women are curious and I'm the only one around, and I can speak and read Thai (at a basic level and improving).

[/ego trip]

[Neeranam]

I've got the Canadian guy beaten! I was a 19 year old student here. Lost my virginity in Indonesia on the way to Thailand. And I'm Black, too! Lots of women are curious and I'm the only one around, and I can speak and read Thai (at a basic level and improving).

[/ego trip]

Thais seem to respect the farang husband a lot more if they have been bothered to learn their language.

[ray23]

The dude feels that in 95% or more of thai/farang relationships that cash was a major factor somewhere along the line. Thems pretty good odds dudes. Furthermore, the dude also feels that 95% of the dudes who claim to be in the 5% category above are living in pipe dreams. Who can dig what the dude is saying?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well it is good to see a Thia guy saying what is on his mind. I don't doubt the figures at all. The thing that I believe can change is how well the two people get along. I had my time with money grabbers no regrets whatsoever, I had fun, they made money, no misuderstandings.

Did I marry any of them, no I married the girl that was my friend and we could have fun doing things that we enjoyed together. For me that is what a mature relationship is about, it is not what I thought it was 20 years ago. Did she come for the money you bet, did I accept her because she was beautiful to me, you bet. That became a friendship and shared approach to life. I could care less if she loved me, although I think she does. What is important to me is can, we be kind and fair to eachother most of the time. Nothing real is a 100%. She can be patient about money, can she make sure that I have my enjoyment as well as she has hers.

The interesting thing is how many times I have heard that Thai women don't care how many other women you have a long as you take care of them. Nothing could be further from the truth, unless of course it is nothing but a financial arrangement. This is not what I have, but I see nothing wrong with unless the two people are not on the same page and understand what is happening.

The other thing that I am beginning to understand or at least I think I do is, the farrangs started nothing here. Thailand and money has always been the same, we just joined the parade that was well in progress when we got here.

Beleive me I see lots of young Thai guys with very beautiful Thai girls. They are still students and are probably not wealthy although thier parents may well be.

What is the precentage of farrangs with Thai women who are the wondeful virgin Thai girl, that Thia young men want so much.

What is the percentage of Farrangs are with former bar girls, devoirced women with childern, non educated girls. I would venture to say this would be a lot higher then the Thai guys dream woman.

The idea that farrangs don't care about virgins and that special lady for them. Of course we were no different then the young Thai guys. What changed was we matured and learned what devoirce was and that forever really meant till a judge says you are no longer married. With age you learn to become more accepting of people and thier pasts, and more concerned about what the person has learn to value in life.

For you young studs out there I only hope you have nearly as much fun a we old guys did at your age LOL

Are Thai guys jealous maybe until they really evaluate what we have and does it really fit the life they want at this point in thier lives. They will have thier turn if they are succesful, nothing is that different for farrangs here then Thai men.

[Morden]

If there is any resentment towards farang men on the part of some Thai men, then Fanta Rood's posts probably explain the reasons. Some younger men may not like the idea of a physically less attractive and probably older man with cash walking away with a pretty Thai woman. I can understand that feeling but perhaps Fanta should consider why Thai women are doing it.

Almost certainly the prospect of a materially more comfortable life is part of it. Why not? We all know that many Thai women live in a poverty trap with few ways out, depite their personal skills. But what about the way that Thai men behave towards them? I don't want to generalise too much because there are some wonderful husbands amongst my inlaws. But I look around at some of the young men in the village and can see why the girls are no where near them. They sit in groups on their motor cycles drinking and looking just a tad intimidating. A relationship is something to brag about. When the girlfriend gets pregnant they may not want to be involved. Even as husbands they may play the field, drink or gamble - or even disappear and leave the family with no income.

So perhaps it's no wonder that a farang who travels half the world looking for a lady who will treat him well will almost certainly find what he is looking for.

So, Fanta, I'm sure that you know how to treat a lady. Act like a farang. Go to LOS and show the ladies that you really want to fall in love with a good woman and take care of her and her children. We fat ugly farang have done it and so can you!

[Morden]

You're all talking about old dudes with Thai girls...

What about young guys like me? 19 year old tall blonde/blue eyed guys coming over for vacations and getting ladies?

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

As a matter of fact, young chap, I feel OK about it because I've been there and done it. If you're very lucky, one day you'll be an old dude too. Those muscles will have wasted a bit and your skin will hang loose. Your mind will have the same desires but will be many times wiser. You're body will want the same things and you'll feel that you're entitled to have them as much as the next person. If you're very lucky, that is.

How do you feel about that?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I've got the Canadian guy beaten! I was a 19 year old student here. Lost my virginity in Indonesia on the way to Thailand. And I'm Black, too! Lots of women are curious and I'm the only one around, and I can speak and read Thai (at a basic level and improving).

[/ego trip]

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Nice one TD.

Maybe you don't even need to learn Thai!!

[SiamOne]

The dude feels that in 95% or more of thai/farang relationships that cash was a major factor somewhere along the line. Thems pretty good odds dudes. Furthermore, the dude also feels that 95% of the dudes who claim to be in the 5% category above are living in pipe dreams. Who can dig what the dude is saying?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's it really...you "feel" 95% etc. You have no real knowledge, your feelings are based on your own experiences, not the true picture.

Pipe dreams for you maybe, but not for many others...I have no idea of percentages

[Neeranam]

QUOTE(Anek18 @ 2005-09-08 09:39:51)

As a Thai man, responding to the topic, I DON"T feel bother by farang+thai lady abit.

It's a normal thing here...  I believes it had a lot to do with our culture.

Of course, we think all farangs are rich. You have to understand most of Thai people are poor. It's a good thing if you have a farang husband because financially your life will be better.  I'm sure some of your money are going toward her family and their lives are better because of you. Traditionally, when we are grown up, Bangkok is where go to works and send some money home to our family. If you have a farang husband you might not even have to work and beable to send some money home. I mentions a lot about the money, but this doesn't means your wife doesn't love you and not all Thai married you because of your assets. I'm sure some farangs might wonder about interracial in Thailand, because where you came from the culture is different.

We don't have racial problem here in Thailand.  smile.gif

*

Good to get a Thai man's view.

It's a good thing if you have a farang husband because financially your life will be better.

NONSENSE. Why so? My wife could have easily married a wealthy Thai guy, but chose not to and married me, who is far from rich.

Fair enough if you are talking about the country bumpkin.

NOT ALL THAI WOMEN MARRY FARANG FOR MONEY, my case is a prime example.

[Tyree D.]

NOT ALL THAI WOMEN MARRY FARANG FOR MONEY, my case is a prime example.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

my GF refuses money from me, even when she paid a bill. we already know we won't marry each other. I think it's funny when we are together and people ask us about marriage and we both frown and shake our heads. She has already had two bad marriages to two Thai guys and I will not get married at an earlier age than my brother or oldest cousin.

[Neeranam]

I will not get married at an earlier age than my brother or oldest cousin.

Why not? How old are they? What have they got to do with anything?