Issan Wedding Costs

[FarangBuddha]

What would be the typical costs for a country-style house wedding for 250-300 guests. Mainly, I'm interested in the cost for 2 beef cows or buffaloes and the other meats and other foods to feed this number of people and beer, lao kao, and soda. I have heard from people in the area quotes from B 30k to B 100k.

Thanks in advance.

[Diablo Bob]

When I had my wedding, MANY years ago, we had a catering company come to Buriram from Poi Et. They provided all the tables & chairs, food & booze. Each table for 4 had 2 bottles or booze, beer on demand etc. Cost for the 150 guests was 30,000 baht.

I would check on the beef, many people in Issan won't/don't eat beef, either because of cost or for whatever reason,they prefer pork. Before you purchase a lot of beef confirm that it would be appreciated and eaten.

[bergen]

Food, cows, whisky, lao khao, soda, beer, for 300 people I would think would cost you around 100k Baht.

300 people = 50 tables seating 6 people

Blend whisky 200 Baht x 50 = 10.000 Baht

Lao Khao 100 baht x 25 = 2.500

soda 150 x 50 (24/table) = 7.500

Leo x 500 x 25 (6/table) = 12.500

2 cows = 20.000?

Other food 100 x 300 = 30.000

exstra Leo beer 500 x 10 = 5.000

so far = 87.500

Just a rough estimate, or something to start with, and then comes music/karaoke, dancing girls, decorations, and more.

Edited May 14, 2011 by bergen

[AliasJohn]

I can help you with a wedding cake....

[Hollywood13]

I hate to break it to you, but 30k isn't going to feed 250 to 300 people. I was married in an Issan village wedding in February at the cost of 100k baht. I can't give you a breakdown of how much was spent on various things, but I can tell you what we had.

Roughly 300 people

2 huge pigs

Unknown amount of chickens

Various other food

Lots and lots of beer and Thai whiskey

1 main wedding cake and 12 smaller wedding cakes (John at Peppers Bakery in Ubon did an AMAZING job with this!)

Photographer

A singer and 4 dancing girls (complete with a huge stage with monster speakers and lots of lights)

A deejay for 2 days

2 different wedding outfits for both my wife and I

7 Monks

A marching band

Police

Thai Army guys

I think that's about it, but I may be leaving some things out. Yes, it was a bit expensive, but nothing compared to the price of an American wedding. The way I figured it, it was a one-time thing, so I wasn't going to concern myself with the price. I just wanted something memorable where everyone would have a good time.

Best of luck with the wedding plans!

[Orac]

I hate to break it to you, but 30k isn't going to feed 250 to 300 people. I was married in an Issan village wedding in February at the cost of 100k baht. I can't give you a breakdown of how much was spent on various things, but I can tell you what we had.

Roughly 300 people

2 huge pigs

Unknown amount of chickens

Various other food

Lots and lots of beer and Thai whiskey

1 main wedding cake and 12 smaller wedding cakes (John at Peppers Bakery in Ubon did an AMAZING job with this!)

Photographer

A singer and 4 dancing girls (complete with a huge stage with monster speakers and lots of lights)

A deejay for 2 days

2 different wedding outfits for both my wife and I

7 Monks

A marching band

Police

Thai Army guys

I think that's about it, but I may be leaving some things out. Yes, it was a bit expensive, but nothing compared to the price of an American wedding. The way I figured it, it was a one-time thing, so I wasn't going to concern myself with the price. I just wanted something memorable where everyone would have a good time.

Best of luck with the wedding plans!

you seem to have missed off the Green Hawk display cost???

[zzaa09]

B75K-B80K should do it.

[FarangBuddha]

Thank you all for the input...it seems that the consensus is at the higher end range of what I have been told.

The plan is for a wedding at the house, for 300 invited guests (not all will show), two whole beef cows [buffaloes?], some fish and the standard veggies dishes, free-flow of domestic beer and lao khow for the adults and soda for the others. No pigs will die for this wedding. Also, no paid entertainment but there will be a stage and entertainment set-up for karoake. Also, there will be the standard flower decorations.

Also, it is customary for the bride or groom to pay for the wedding costs (or if the bride's family, do they take out a loan and pay it back with a portion of the sin-sot?)

[Hollywood13]

I haven't a clue what's "customary" as far as who pays for a Thai-Thai wedding, but you being a farang, YOU'LL be paying for yours...I can almost guarantee that based one what you've already posted (an at home village wedding).

At my wedding, my wife's parents did quite a bit (all the organization and what-not). In fact, the whole village seemed to pitch in. I remember old gals up past midnight the evening prior to the wedding making the center pieces. It was really very nice to see everyone come together to make it a special event. The Thais seem to have a sense of community which I never really experienced in the States (possibly because I always lived in large cities back there). It's one of the reason why I like Issan so much.

Basically what I did was give my wife THB 100k and told her to have at it. The sin sot was THB 200k (which was returned to me after the wedding, as previously agreed upon), and I gave my wife 2 baht of gold. Pretty much everyone who attended went to a small table where 2 guys sat and made a monetary donation (put in a box). There was quite a bit of money in that box when all was said and done. I opted to let my in-laws keep all of that, even though they tried to give it to my wife and I. In addition to that, during the evening party, my wife and I made our way around to thank everyone for coming and we were given envelopes of money from all the guests (the same envelopes our wedding invitations were sent in). Thousands of baht were gifted that way, all of which I gave to my wife. Oh, and at the end of the part of the ceremony presided over by the monks, baht was tied to our wrists. That was easily over THB 5k. So, as you can see, it's possible to get back quite a bit of the money you spend on the wedding, if you want it.

[SantiSuk]

Thank you all for the input...it seems that the consensus is at the higher end range of what I have been told.

The plan is for a wedding at the house, for 300 invited guests (not all will show), two whole beef cows [buffaloes?], some fish and the standard veggies dishes, free-flow of domestic beer and lao khow for the adults and soda for the others. No pigs will die for this wedding. Also, no paid entertainment but there will be a stage and entertainment set-up for karoake. Also, there will be the standard flower decorations.

Also, it is customary for the bride or groom to pay for the wedding costs (or if the bride's family, do they take out a loan and pay it back with a portion of the sin-sot?)

I had to smile at the comment '300 invited guests (not all will show)'

If you have invited 300, expect 400 to show up (unless you are talking about your foreign mates)! You may have invited a man and his wife but his kids and his granny and his aunt may well regard his as an open family invitation.

I'm serious. We had about 30% more than invites and it needed some very quick thinking to get in extras on the night

You should get a significant chunk of the wedding costs back in wedding money from the guests.

Talk these things through with your to-be wife and MIL. They will know what happens about finance and cost to a quite detailed level you would not expect.

Edited May 14, 2011 by SantiSuk

[SantiSuk]

And to be a bit more constructive here is an extract of feedback I gave to Shivers on TV before his wedding.

'As it happens I was an accountant in an earlier incarnation and therefore anal in the extreme when it comes to how much I have spent - not to be confused with being tight I hasten to add.

My total expenditure on our SiSaket (amphur Khantaralak) Issaan wedding in July 2009 together with related activities was 236,689 baht, give or take the odd few baht [seriously how sad is it that I can be that precise]. But that includes 63,150 of Bangkok lawyer fees for a prenuptial (optional probably even for someone with assets to protect) and assistance (worthwhile) with registering the marriage in Bangkok. It also includes 55,000 for the wedding ring (which is probably a bit cheap charlie on reflection, now that I remember I spent £1,000 the first go-around 35 years ago).

So, without those two items, lawyer fees and ring, and without the sin sod the total amount was 118,000 baht. That comprised:

Food and entertainment 83,000

Drinks 26,000

Photographer, Videocameraman and purchase of some studio formal photos 18,000

Flowers for the wedding night formal party 5,000

Wedding document fees (some were for passport) 4,000

Invitation printing for 225 people (150 printed) 2,000

Trueso gifts for formal party guests (+ special ones for family) 3,000

Wedding dress 3,000

Make up and hair for formal studio photo session and on the wedding day 2,500

Reduced by: Wedding money gifted by party and wedding ceremony attendees -28,000

We had a full on party at the house the night before the wedding (celebrating our moving into the house) with food and drink - maybe 100 attended, a formal wedding ceremony morning with food at the house before the wedding and during and after the ceremony - maybe 150 attended - and a formal evening sit down wedding party with paid host/hostess, band and coyotee girls - 225 ish invited / 325 showed up!! We also had a clean up party for maybe 40 the day after and the multitude of cooks got a couple of thou baht as a thank you included in this. We also had extended family staying over a 3-4 day period and their eating and drinking throughout is included also. A couple of uncles were paralytic for the best part of 60 hours.

The actual formal wedding party was relatively cheap (massively cheap compared to falangland). Included in the 83,000 above for 3-4 days of food and entertainment is the wedding party organisers fee of 45,000 for the wedding night party venue (should have been a school playing field but a downpour made it a glorified cowshed), set table-served food and food servers - I think it was baht 1200 baht for a table of 8 - the band and the coyotee girls (2 troupes - I didn't ask for them or know I had hired them, but they were a real sight for sore eyes!). The food (8 courses) was fine but I think a cow and pig in similar circs might have pushed the price up. I'm guessing but I would expect a pig and cow plus serving to cost in the region of 15,000-20,000 baht. You will see however that the formal wedding party was only half of the cost of the total food consumed over a 3-4 day period so if yours is not so stupid as to combine a moving in party with a wedding then you would get savings on my total food bill anyway.

The party organiser did not organsie the alcohol/softies. I did that as my wife said this is an area you need to keep a reign on. My wife was much more parsimonious than I would be - she suggested one bottle of Thai whiskey (Johnnie W - only red - for the top tables) and half a dozen bottles of Archa on each table plus soda/water/softies. I applied my western party giving analysis to alcohol consumption and secretly bought far more than this. Multiples in fact. Given that the event turned into a 3 day marathon I was continuously handing out 1,000 baht notes for someone to go down the local shops. If you go for DIY let me warn you that alcohol and softies on this scale was a serious trucking job from Tesco and the Kantaralak wholesalers. I also made the faux pas of putting the copious quantities of Lao Khao out on the wedding party tables. That is just not done apparently. You bring it out clandestinely for all the serious drinkers when the polite people have departed and the dancing starts!

Also a tip. Keep plenty of cash in your pocket throughout. Wedding party life is one long litany of 'darling Mum/Uncle/(fill in the requisite person) need x,000 baht to get y'

My MIL also paid for some food on top of all this and paid for the 'marching band'. I didn't expect the latter and so I'll leave you to be pleasantly surprised also. I guess she paid another 20,000. So that's 138,000 all up and maybe you would pay a bit more for cow and pig and ... well you can do whatever adjustments you like for numbers and extent of celebration.

My abiding impression was that I was far from ripped off. The photography aspect in the UK would have cost 5 to 10 times the amount I spent (a formal studio camera session two weeks in advance including pro hair and makeup, a cameraman for the whole morning wedding ceremony (6 hours) and for the evening party, a videocameraman for the whole morning session and evening party and free copiable CDs of all their work except the formal studio session. A couple of big framed prints and a small album of studio prints also comes in my 18,000 outturn (goodness - now I'm getting flashbacks of an early career in financial reporting). The party organiser charged a tiny nominal amount more for 325 people than the contracted 225 - 'that's ok - we had enough food anyway'. Ancillaries like invites gifts and flowers do not seem to attract the 'captive audience' premium they do in falangland. I negotiated nothing. My wife organised everything and I simply turned up and agreed to what was being asked for with a smile on my face and a 'god that was relatively painless' thought on my mind.

Of course a lot of village freeloaders drank and ate at my expense. So what else is (not) new in the world of weddings worldwide!

I did a family blog of the whole experience which I put on TV somewhere - I'll dig the link out later. '

Edited May 14, 2011 by SantiSuk

[bergen]

And to be a bit more constructive here is an extract of feedback I gave to Shivers on TV before his wedding.

'As it happens I was an accountant in an earlier incarnation and therefore anal in the extreme when it comes to how much I have spent - not to be confused with being tight I hasten to add.

My total expenditure on our SiSaket (amphur Khantaralak) Issaan wedding in July 2009 together with related activities was 236,689 baht, give or take the odd few baht [seriously how sad is it that I can be that precise]. But that includes 63,150 of Bangkok lawyer fees for a prenuptial (optional probably even for someone with assets to protect) and assistance (worthwhile) with registering the marriage in Bangkok. It also includes 55,000 for the wedding ring (which is probably a bit cheap charlie on reflection, now that I remember I spent £1,000 the first go-around 35 years ago).

So, without those two items, lawyer fees and ring, and without the sin sod the total amount was 118,000 baht. That comprised:

Food and entertainment 83,000

Drinks 26,000

Photographer, Videocameraman and purchase of some studio formal photos 18,000

Flowers for the wedding night formal party 5,000

Wedding document fees (some were for passport) 4,000

Invitation printing for 225 people (150 printed) 2,000

Trueso gifts for formal party guests (+ special ones for family) 3,000

Wedding dress 3,000

Make up and hair for formal studio photo session and on the wedding day 2,500

Reduced by: Wedding money gifted by party and wedding ceremony attendees -28,000

We had a full on party at the house the night before the wedding (celebrating our moving into the house) with food and drink - maybe 100 attended, a formal wedding ceremony morning with food at the house before the wedding and during and after the ceremony - maybe 150 attended - and a formal evening sit down wedding party with paid host/hostess, band and coyotee girls - 225 ish invited / 325 showed up!! We also had a clean up party for maybe 40 the day after and the multitude of cooks got a couple of thou baht as a thank you included in this. We also had extended family staying over a 3-4 day period and their eating and drinking throughout is included also. A couple of uncles were paralytic for the best part of 60 hours.

The actual formal wedding party was relatively cheap (massively cheap compared to falangland). Included in the 83,000 above for 3-4 days of food and entertainment is the wedding party organisers fee of 45,000 for the wedding night party venue (should have been a school playing field but a downpour made it a glorified cowshed), set table-served food and food servers - I think it was baht 1200 baht for a table of 8 - the band and the coyotee girls (2 troupes - I didn't ask for them or know I had hired them, but they were a real sight for sore eyes!). The food (8 courses) was fine but I think a cow and pig in similar circs might have pushed the price up. I'm guessing but I would expect a pig and cow plus serving to cost in the region of 15,000-20,000 baht. You will see however that the formal wedding party was only half of the cost of the total food consumed over a 3-4 day period so if yours is not so stupid as to combine a moving in party with a wedding then you would get savings on my total food bill anyway.

The party organiser did not organsie the alcohol/softies. I did that as my wife said this is an area you need to keep a reign on. My wife was much more parsimonious than I would be - she suggested one bottle of Thai whiskey (Johnnie W - only red - for the top tables) and half a dozen bottles of Archa on each table plus soda/water/softies. I applied my western party giving analysis to alcohol consumption and secretly bought far more than this. Multiples in fact. Given that the event turned into a 3 day marathon I was continuously handing out 1,000 baht notes for someone to go down the local shops. If you go for DIY let me warn you that alcohol and softies on this scale was a serious trucking job from Tesco and the Kantaralak wholesalers. I also made the faux pas of putting the copious quantities of Lao Khao out on the wedding party tables. That is just not done apparently. You bring it out clandestinely for all the serious drinkers when the polite people have departed and the dancing starts!

Also a tip. Keep plenty of cash in your pocket throughout. Wedding party life is one long litany of 'darling Mum/Uncle/(fill in the requisite person) need x,000 baht to get y'

My MIL also paid for some food on top of all this and paid for the 'marching band'. I didn't expect the latter and so I'll leave you to be pleasantly surprised also. I guess she paid another 20,000. So that's 138,000 all up and maybe you would pay a bit more for cow and pig and ... well you can do whatever adjustments you like for numbers and extent of celebration.

My abiding impression was that I was far from ripped off. The photography aspect in the UK would have cost 5 to 10 times the amount I spent (a formal studio camera session two weeks in advance including pro hair and makeup, a cameraman for the whole morning wedding ceremony (6 hours) and for the evening party, a videocameraman for the whole morning session and evening party and free copiable CDs of all their work except the formal studio session. A couple of big framed prints and a small album of studio prints also comes in my 18,000 outturn (goodness - now I'm getting flashbacks of an early career in financial reporting). The party organiser charged a tiny nominal amount more for 325 people than the contracted 225 - 'that's ok - we had enough food anyway'. Ancillaries like invites gifts and flowers do not seem to attract the 'captive audience' premium they do in falangland. I negotiated nothing. My wife organised everything and I simply turned up and agreed to what was being asked for with a smile on my face and a 'god that was relatively painless' thought on my mind.

Of course a lot of village freeloaders drank and ate at my expense. So what else is (not) new in the world of weddings worldwide!

I did a family blog of the whole experience which I put on TV somewhere - I'll dig the link out later. '

I now know where to look if I need an accountant!

(Ps. I intended to add a smile, but the Emoticons didn't work)

[zzaa09]

I haven't a clue what's "customary" as far as who pays for a Thai-Thai wedding, but you being a farang, YOU'LL be paying for yours...I can almost guarantee that based one what you've already posted (an at home village wedding).

At my wedding, my wife's parents did quite a bit (all the organization and what-not). In fact, the whole village seemed to pitch in. I remember old gals up past midnight the evening prior to the wedding making the center pieces. It was really very nice to see everyone come together to make it a special event. The Thais seem to have a sense of community which I never really experienced in the States (possibly because I always lived in large cities back there). It's one of the reason why I like Issan so much.

Basically what I did was give my wife THB 100k and told her to have at it. The sin sot was THB 200k (which was returned to me after the wedding, as previously agreed upon), and I gave my wife 2 baht of gold. Pretty much everyone who attended went to a small table where 2 guys sat and made a monetary donation (put in a box). There was quite a bit of money in that box when all was said and done. I opted to let my in-laws keep all of that, even though they tried to give it to my wife and I. In addition to that, during the evening party, my wife and I made our way around to thank everyone for coming and we were given envelopes of money from all the guests (the same envelopes our wedding invitations were sent in). Thousands of baht were gifted that way, all of which I gave to my wife. Oh, and at the end of the part of the ceremony presided over by the monks, baht was tied to our wrists. That was easily over THB 5k. So, as you can see, it's possible to get back quite a bit of the money you spend on the wedding, if you want it.

Indeed, Shivers. In many cases the cost of the party can be halved after expecting to receive the assorted cash gifts here and there.

We spent about 100K for the overall gathering and gained about 40K back in "donations".......350 folks attending.

It's so difficult to extend any such advice towards these things, as every situation will be different - marriage, baht gold, sin sot, party, etc. Be it Thai/Thai or Thai/Farang.

Over the years, I've attended quite a number of wedding gatherings......and they all range differently - from small and informal to the grand and expensive affairs {up to 400K}. All the factors are dependent on what one can afford or what one desires to pursue. You just have to approach the nominal costs as it is what it is.

[zzaa09]

[sic]... for 300 invited guests (not all will show), two whole beef cows [buffaloes?]. No pigs will die for this wedding.

One can appreciated the attachment for saving a couple of pigs, FB.

No pigs will sacrifice themselves, but two Brahma beefs will?

A caveat should be noted, as to what Diablo Bob has stated - beef will be the least popular among Thais. Chicken, pork, and fish would suffice.

[sarahsbloke]

I would say ZERO was the correct amount to spend on a village wedding.

Feeding a load of people you don't know, just so the in-laws can have a big brag.

What do I know though!

[cardholder]

Thank you all for the input...it seems that the consensus is at the higher end range of what I have been told.

The plan is for a wedding at the house, for 300 invited guests (not all will show), two whole beef cows [buffaloes?], some fish and the standard veggies dishes, free-flow of domestic beer and lao khow for the adults and soda for the others. No pigs will die for this wedding. Also, no paid entertainment but there will be a stage and entertainment set-up for karoake. Also, there will be the standard flower decorations.

Also, it is customary for the bride or groom to pay for the wedding costs (or if the bride's family, do they take out a loan and pay it back with a portion of the sin-sot?)

You won't kill pigs but you are happy to kill cows (that the guests will turn their noses up at - unless it is Laab Isaan).

There will surely bee more than the invited number and many of the hangers-on and scroungers will be observed scooping heaps of food into their carrier bags - probably about 15 minutes after their table runs out of lao khao.

Don't say you are actually going to pay sin sod !!!!!!

[janverbeem]

Thank you all for the input...it seems that the consensus is at the higher end range of what I have been told.

The plan is for a wedding at the house, for 300 invited guests (not all will show), two whole beef cows [buffaloes?], some fish and the standard veggies dishes, free-flow of domestic beer and lao khow for the adults and soda for the others. No pigs will die for this wedding. Also, no paid entertainment but there will be a stage and entertainment set-up for karoake. Also, there will be the standard flower decorations.

Also, it is customary for the bride or groom to pay for the wedding costs (or if the bride's family, do they take out a loan and pay it back with a portion of the sin-sot?)

You won't kill pigs but you are happy to kill cows (that the guests will turn their noses up at - unless it is Laab Isaan).

There will surely bee more than the invited number and many of the hangers-on and scroungers will be observed scooping heaps of food into their carrier bags - probably about 15 minutes after their table runs out of lao khao.

Don't say you are actually going to pay sin sod !!!!!!

Now you understand why he expect less guests than invited?It was on the invitations that only beef would be served

[englishinsiam]

I suggest getting a Chinese table company we were married in Chachoengsao and had around 300 guests. And you will get people you didn't invite so expect around 20% more than you invited as a minimum. They all want food thats the only reason they are there for most of them.

We paid approx 1,200 Baht per Table of 8 people. Drink was on top and I was short of Whiskey so had to get someone to go out and get more Whiskey.

We kept the cash from the envelopes and we ended up with around 45,000 Baht after we paid all the bills.

I would suggest inviting all your European/American mates the minimum they will put in an envelope is 1,000 Baht

Her sisters did most of the arranging for us and as a gift we gave each of them and her brothers 5,000 Baht that was my idea to say thank you for their help, without them our day would not have been so amazing.

I was thinking the same as you before we married money how much etc.... But at the end of the day if you love your wife and want her to have an amazing day don't worry about the money. Just enjoy the experience of being the special one that day. Thai's have a great way to make the Groom feel special too it's not all about the Bride.

[SanukJoeII]

I haven't a clue what's "customary" as far as who pays for a Thai-Thai wedding, but you being a farang, YOU'LL be paying for yours...I can almost guarantee that based one what you've already posted (an at home village wedding).

At my wedding, my wife's parents did quite a bit (all the organization and what-not). In fact, the whole village seemed to pitch in. I remember old gals up past midnight the evening prior to the wedding making the center pieces. It was really very nice to see everyone come together to make it a special event. The Thais seem to have a sense of community which I never really experienced in the States (possibly because I always lived in large cities back there). It's one of the reason why I like Issan so much.

Basically what I did was give my wife THB 100k and told her to have at it. The sin sot was THB 200k (which was returned to me after the wedding, as previously agreed upon), and I gave my wife 2 baht of gold. Pretty much everyone who attended went to a small table where 2 guys sat and made a monetary donation (put in a box). There was quite a bit of money in that box when all was said and done. I opted to let my in-laws keep all of that, even though they tried to give it to my wife and I. In addition to that, during the evening party, my wife and I made our way around to thank everyone for coming and we were given envelopes of money from all the guests (the same envelopes our wedding invitations were sent in). Thousands of baht were gifted that way, all of which I gave to my wife. Oh, and at the end of the part of the ceremony presided over by the monks, baht was tied to our wrists. That was easily over THB 5k. So, as you can see, it's possible to get back quite a bit of the money you spend on the wedding, if you want it.

Shivers, congratulations on having found a family in law that performs wedding rules as they were intended to.

First, they gave back the sin sod, which is absolutely correct. They could have used part of it to pay for the wedding ceremonies but you paid that yourself.

Secondly they returned (or intended to) the guests money. Again totally correct as the guests donate to the wedding couple not to the MIL!

Many greedy people mix up things in a way they get more than they deserve. I've seen several weddings where MIL kept the sin sod, kept the guests money and let the farang pay for the ceremony! Only the wrist wrapping money is personal, wonder why it was invented?

Funny enough when looking at Thai/Thai weddings things can be much cheaper and less money is involved, still having 200+ guests. Sin sod is average 30K and the two families of the wedding couple pay for the ceremony. There will be food enough, beer and softies are served, not put at a table, those who want to drink Lao khao can buy themselves or are having a small bottle donated by some friend. That way all is under control, catering does not exist, neighbour wives cook, teenage girls serve the food and drinks, all for free or for a minimal expense. Still a very happy gathering, very social and warm event indeed.

I don't say the expensive weddings are rubbish, not at all, every one should spend the money he has available for such events and willing to spend. Just sometimes farang ask me what to expect and if such and such spending is not over the limit. There are no limits, you set your own. Many farang however are taken out that's for sure!

Just to avoid being considered kee niao (stingy): I did not pay sin sod but I paid for the wedding plus a day out with extended family. Instead of sin sod I promised to improve the parents house, which I did, I also spent 30K for the village temple which was under renovation at that time. To me all was well spent money, nobody got "just money" because of some dug up (and misinterpreted) Isan tradition :jap:

Joe

[trisailer]

I gave my wife a 70,000 baht budget and that was a negotiation. We did the Thai village wedding with her two cousins who married German guys. I don't know what they paid.

It was a beautiful thing to see how the whole community pitched in and made it a success. My wife has 5 aunts and they are all perfectionist control freaks and it was great to see the whole thing come together. One aunt has a fish pond and supplied about 100Kg of fish. It was cool to watch the men swimming around with a big net catching them all. Everywhere around the neighborhood there were people doing something to prepare. One of my wifes HS friends is an extraordinary floral arranger and he worked nonstop with 2 assistants for two days preparing the most beautiful displays I've ever seen. I walked around taking pictures and enjoying the whole thing.

The whole thing was worth the expense just to see how they did it.

Be prepared for the pain that comes with sitting on the floor for long periods of time.

I made it clear from the start that I was OK with people having a glass or two of beer, which came out of the budget, but I would not tolerate any drunkenness. Fortunately my wifes family are all respectable folks and there were no problems. Her grandmother is the matriarch of the community and no one would think of dishonoring her.

Just remember that only you can determine what you can afford and when you marry into a Thai family you better be prepared to respectfully negotiate everything, forever.

I would give serious thought to the amount of booze you supply. One sure fired way to ruin a beautiful thing is to add alcohol. If your marrying into a drinking family than you have no idea the trouble your in for.

Edited May 15, 2011 by trisailer

[prakhonchai nick]

I would say ZERO was the correct amount to spend on a village wedding.

Feeding a load of people you don't know, just so the in-laws can have a big brag.

What do I know though!

You know a lot!

Most of the 300+ guests will be freeloaders. Many -very many -will just visit, not attend the ceremony; not even see the bride and groom, but will leave with bags of food and bottles to take home.

I would not have a party! I did not have a party!

Get married at the amphur...40bt!. Take the immediate (not extended) family for a nice meal and evening out.

Spend the money on yourself and wife and new home. Not on the villagers and dignatories invited along for show!

[zzaa09]

I would say ZERO was the correct amount to spend on a village wedding.

Feeding a load of people you don't know, just so the in-laws can have a big brag.

What do I know though!

You know a lot!

Most of the 300+ guests will be freeloaders. Many -very many -will just visit, not attend the ceremony; not even see the bride and groom, but will leave with bags of food and bottles to take home.

I would not have a party! I did not have a party!

Get married at the amphur...40bt!. Take the immediate (not extended) family for a nice meal and evening out.

Spend the money on yourself and wife and new home. Not on the villagers and dignatories invited along for show!

You're a loving soul, Nick

[user82374298374]

I just wanted something memorable where everyone would have a good time.

Don't forget to factor in the legal fees and other ancillary expenses from the inevitable divorce, not to mention fees for sick buffaloes, bail/bribe money for brother Somchai on his third yaa-baa conviction, the plot of land, the house which must be built on the plot of land, the motocys for various tertiary relatives, et. al.

;>

Edited May 15, 2011 by disambiguated

[FarangBuddha]

Thanks allot for the mostly very helpful and informative replies (minus the usual T-V troll and bitter-expat posts). After reviewing this information, my intended's estimate of around B 100,000 cost for her family's portion of the wedding doesn't sound outside the ballpark. Here is the rundown of what is being planned for a country-house wedding in a tiny sub-village around 1.5 hours from Khon Keon:

Sin Sot of B 200,000; from this, bride's parents will pay for the above described wedding at a cost of around B 100,000, with the parents to keep any remainder.

From the "guest collection," she estimates a haul of between B 60-70k (as is typical for her area). This money is hers (ours) to keep. So the "net" cost of the Sin Sot to me/us is around B 130-140k.

I will also give my bride two-baht of gold (B 45,000), which of course, is her personal property, and buy a gold wedding ring at my discretion (I'm thinking around two-salung ). I will also pay for the rental of the wedding dress, my suit, and the dresses of 2 bridesmaids and their hair dues, make-up and the like (B 5000). Of course, I'm also paying the airfares from Bangkok for my party of 2-3 people, hotel and car-rental for the week as well.

So all in all, it's looking to cost me around B 300,000, which includes the costs of my party, with a return of maybe B 60,000 in gift money and the B 45,000 of gold, which, though "hers" is actually property of the marriage. So it looks like a net out of pocket cost to me of around B 200,000 or about US$ 6500.

Does that sound pretty reasonable for a never before married girl with no kids (who is also the only daughter in the family [so only one sin sot] who is partially college educated and a very "nice [i.e. non-bar]" girl?

Edited May 15, 2011 by FarangBuddha

[sarahsbloke]

Does that sound pretty reasonable for a never before married girl with no kids (who is also the only daughter in the family [so only one sin sot] who is partially college educated and a very "nice [i.e. non-bar]" girl?

It would be interesting to hear your ages?

Just being nosy .....

[FarangBuddha]

Does that sound pretty reasonable for a never before married girl with no kids (who is also the only daughter in the family [so only one sin sot] who is partially college educated and a very "nice [i.e. non-bar]" girl?

It would be interesting to hear your ages?

Just being nosy .....

30 and 45...sorry to disappoint you...as if it made any difference.

[sarahsbloke]

Does that sound pretty reasonable for a never before married girl with no kids (who is also the only daughter in the family [so only one sin sot] who is partially college educated and a very "nice [i.e. non-bar]" girl?

It would be interesting to hear your ages?

Just being nosy .....

30 and 45...sorry to disappoint you...as if it made any difference.

I wish you the best .......... BUT

(I class myself as being fairly cynical, rather than bitter or a troll, I have never been ripped off by a Thai lady and enjoy them tremendously, I enjoy the good girls and the gold-diggers equally)

I would point out that a 30YO Thai lady never previously married and with no children is extremely unusual.

Have you lived full-time in Thailand long?

[FarangBuddha]

Does that sound pretty reasonable for a never before married girl with no kids (who is also the only daughter in the family [so only one sin sot] who is partially college educated and a very "nice [i.e. non-bar]" girl?

It would be interesting to hear your ages?

Just being nosy .....

30 and 45...sorry to disappoint you...as if it made any difference.

I wish you the best .......... BUT

(I class myself as being fairly cynical, rather than bitter or a troll, I have never been ripped off by a Thai lady and enjoy them tremendously, I enjoy the good girls and the gold-diggers equally)

I would point out that a 30YO Thai lady never previously married and with no children is extremely unusual.

Have you lived full-time in Thailand long?

Does full-time for over 10 years qualify as "long"? I too have never been married, either in farangland or Thailand, so it's the first time for both of us. And though I don't want to brag, yes, I think my girl is "unusual" in so many respects that she is the one who finally got me to the "alter."

PS: I have nothing against any Thai girls, "good" or "bad," and have enjoyed the company of both over the years and wish them all well :jap:

Edited May 15, 2011 by FarangBuddha

[sarahsbloke]

I too have never been married, either in farangland or Thailand, so it's the first time for both of us. And though I don't want to brag, yes, I think my girl is "unusual" in so many respects that she is the one who finally got me to the "alter."

That's great!

But not sure that your comparison is fair, a 30yo only daughter from a rural family, not married and no children, so nobody to support the 'olds' is a fairly desperate situation for a third world family to be in. Being the bad person that I surely am, I would be expecting them to pay me sinsot to save them!

You've been here 10 years so should be able to speak enough Thai to not be taken like so many newbies are.

[sarahsbloke]

oops

Edited May 15, 2011 by sarahsbloke