Role Of The Mother In Thai Society

[seahorse]

When Thai people see me with my son for the first time, they often ask him where his mother is. It seems to be quite rare for a father to be seen alone with kids never mind taking care of them. I have seen many instances of kids here being looked after by the mother's mother / extended family. In fact, it seems to me to be more common than the mother taking care of the child.

So I would like to ask - just what is expected of the mother? What does a "traditional" Thai mother do?

[snoophound]

More what does the Father do!!hence the comments.

Mother does everything in my experience.

When Thai people see me with my son for the first time, they often ask him where his mother is. It seems to be quite rare for a father to be seen alone with kids never mind taking care of them. I have seen many instances of kids here being looked after by the mother's mother / extended family. In fact, it seems to me to be more common than the mother taking care of the child.

So I would like to ask - just what is expected of the mother? What does a "traditional" Thai mother do?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[chanchao]

Quick, please everyone tell my wife that she should be doing everything. :-))

I'd say that in single parent families it's by far the most common to have the mother take care of the kids. Same as in the West really. Though I do know of some cases where the father takes care of his kids.

So it's not strange to ask where the mother is. And if there's no mother, I can imagine that in more than a few cases the implication is to apply for the position, or help find soeone to fill that spot!

Anyway, personally I do everything except change diapers; that's just not a man's job. Oh wait, I also dont breast-feed.

[bina]

the grandmother (from either side) welds a lot of power over son and daughter in law and if the parents are working long hours, or the mother is not available, then the grandmother raises the child (at least in the traditional country areas), probably in the upper middle classes etc there are nurse maids nannies, etc, but even then, i have friends that farmed their daughter off to an aunt and uncle far from home due to their long work hours but not wanting a 'stranger' to provide child care.though they could afford it...

extended families in general are very important in child rearing ... the divorced men i know have kids living with grandmother, even though or because the mother remarried and not trusting the stepfather with teenage daughters (seems to be a common thought among men i speak)

but not living with them.... a father cannot be a mother as far as they are concerned...

[thaihome]

When Thai people see me with my son for the first time, they often ask him where his mother is. It seems to be quite rare for a father to be seen alone with kids never mind taking care of them. I have seen many instances of kids here being looked after by the mother's mother / extended family. In fact, it seems to me to be more common than the mother taking care of the child.

So I would like to ask - just what is expected of the mother? What does a "traditional" Thai mother do?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

From your comment that is more common to see kids raised by extended family then by mother it would seem your main exposure is in the very poor rural areas where parents have left kids to go make money unavailable at home. This happens pretty much everywhere in poor developing countries, Thailand is fortunate that in most cases, there is an intact extended family and the family ties are very strong. Saying that, both of my wife’s sisters fulfill what would be considered a traditional role. They stay mostly close to the house, cleaning, cooking, washing clothes, raising vegetables in garden. During heavy work times, planting and harvesting, they go out in the fields and help. They are probably the two finest, hardest working women I have ever met in my life (except my wife, of course).

Interestingly, I was in Sizzler (at a non farang mall) yesterday (Sunday) for lunch and there were 3 Thai men there with their kids, without the mother. Struck me as very similar to what you often see on weekends in the US when divorced fathers have the kids for the weekend.

TH