Noodle Farm

[loong]

... then perhaps not only should he invest in the noodles but also some Land making machinery"??.....just trying to be helpful

Hey I wanna know more about that. If I make the land myself, can I own it?

I've never actually seen one of these machines, I don't think that there are any here in Isaan. I think that they must be in Pattaya because I know of quite a few ladies that have no land at all but after going to Pattaya they suddenly have lots of land and a new house. The machines for making gold and pick-ups are probably also located in the Pattaya area.

I wonder what the productive positioning of these land, house, gold making machines is. Vertical or horizontal?

And can you own one of these machines outright, of do you have to lease them long term with regular royalty payments going back to the original manufacturers?

I have only heard rumours, but the girls that have most land have mentioned that there was something to do with spinning round a vertical pole and then further horizontal mechanicals later.

[kevjohn]

Loong

The son in laws plan was to produce chicken noodles but you have given him something to fall back on if that does not take off.

Must admit that it is not good to have all your chickens and noodles in one basket.

[h90]

May I remind fellow posters to keep on topic, and to use the 'Report' function when off-topic posts attempt to divert us into other avenues for discussion.

You may recall a documentary in 1957 regarding spaghetti trees, which may be of interest to the OP.

Noodles are great; it really helps to use one's.

I imagine noodle farming would prove very successful in Isaan, because of the number of buffalo required. I am surprised at how easily people from Isaan seem to be able to trap buffalo.

SC

I am planning to build a buffalo hospital in Isaan as there are some many reports that these beast get sick easily and treatment is very expensive.

[StreetCowboy]

May I remind fellow posters to keep on topic, and to use the 'Report' function when off-topic posts attempt to divert us into other avenues for discussion.

You may recall a documentary in 1957 regarding spaghetti trees, which may be of interest to the OP.

Noodles are great; it really helps to use one's.

I imagine noodle farming would prove very successful in Isaan, because of the number of buffalo required. I am surprised at how easily people from Isaan seem to be able to trap buffalo.

SC

I am planning to build a buffalo hospital in Isaan as there are some many reports that these beast get sick easily and treatment is very expensive.

Let me invest. I am sure it will save me money in the long run...

[Ricardo]

The noodle-bush is presumably related, in the botanical sense, to the spaghetti-tree, which the BBC once ran a story on, at this time of year ?

I understand that the spaghetti tree doesn't flourish in this climate. You've given me an idea though. Maybe try grafting onto the noodle bush. Although a smaller market, spaghetti would surely bring higher returns

Being lower-down, it would be easier to pick the spaghetti off bushes, at harvest-time !

[GentlemanJim]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

[StreetCowboy]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

That just seems cruel. Jews have enough to contend with as it is.

[mauGR1]

I have a wonderful idea : why not graft the noodle trees with fruit trees ?

I will be great to have mango-noodles, banana-noodles and tamarind-noodles...I could make huge money out of it, but i feel generous today

[StreetCowboy]

I have a wonderful idea : why not graft the noodle trees with fruit trees ?

I will be great to have mango-noodles, banana-noodles and tamarind-noodles...I could make huge money out of it, but i feel generous today

I like to use noodles as art. That would be a noodle doodle.

SOmetimes i add a tune That would be a noodle doodle and a noodle doodle tootle too.

Simple, eh?

SC

[canuckamuck]

I discovered this ancient incantation which when repeated results in meatball trees, but I believe the technique is closely related to noodle farming

On top of spaghetti,

All covered with cheese,

I lost my poor meatball,

When somebody sneezed.

It rolled off the table,

And on to the floor,

And then my poor meatball,

Rolled out of the door.

It rolled in the garden,

And under a bush,

And then my poor meatball,

Was nothing but mush.

The mush was as tasty

As tasty could be,

And then the next summer,

It grew into a tree.

The tree was all covered,

All covered with moss,

And on it grew meatballs,

And tomato sauce.

So if you eat spaghetti,

All covered with cheese,

Hold on to your meatball,

Whenever you sneeze.

[pattayadingo]

Loong

The son in laws plan was to produce chicken noodles but you have given him something to fall back on if that does not take off.

Must admit that it is not good to have all your chickens and noodles in one basket.

That got me to thinking.

You could always graft some noodle trimmings onto an Egg Plant and have egg noodles. Take it one step further and you could genetically engineer the egg noodle plants with hen embryos. The new species could then lay ready made egg noodle in shells that would have a built in chicken flavour.

That would leave you with all your eggs in one basket.

Hmmm, medication time for me, methinks.

[StreetCowboy]

Loong

The son in laws plan was to produce chicken noodles but you have given him something to fall back on if that does not take off.

Must admit that it is not good to have all your chickens and noodles in one basket.

That got me to thinking.

You could always graft some noodle trimmings onto an Egg Plant and have egg noodles. Take it one step further and you could genetically engineer the egg noodle plants with hen embryos. The new species could then lay ready made egg noodle in shells that would have a built in chicken flavour.

That would leave you with all your eggs in one basket.

Hmmm, medication time for me, methinks.

I've a notion for a potion from across the ocean.

Perhaps skin-whitening lotion.

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/543783-if-you-were-allowed-to/page__view__findpost__p__5179027

SC

[theblether]

Loong

The son in laws plan was to produce chicken noodles but you have given him something to fall back on if that does not take off.

Must admit that it is not good to have all your chickens and noodles in one basket.

That got me to thinking.

You could always graft some noodle trimmings onto an Egg Plant and have egg noodles. Take it one step further and you could genetically engineer the egg noodle plants with hen embryos. The new species could then lay ready made egg noodle in shells that would have a built in chicken flavour.

That would leave you with all your eggs in one basket.

Hmmm, medication time for me, methinks.

Shock development

pattayadingo is thinking

who would have thought??

[kevjohn]

Seems like all these different noodle types are endless.

Chicken noodles, egg noodles, banana noodles, plain noodles and....and....and.....and.....and....... stuffed noodles.

[theblether]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

i think there is a lot of value in your suggestion however I have to point out a couple of issues.

Personally I find it difficult to deal with Haggi during mating season, there is something about the mating call that just pierces me.........that constant refrain of..........

" getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye " wears me down.

So I am prepared to invest as long as you take care of the husbandry.

As for your excellent Kosher idea there is the issue of circumcision to consider, you will have to capture these small aggressive creatures and perform said circumcision on them to ensure that they are producing genuinely Kosher food stuffs.

I think streetcowboy may be able to assist you in that regard.

[StreetCowboy]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

i think there is a lot of value in your suggestion however I have to point out a couple of issues.

Personally I find it difficult to deal with Haggi during mating season, there is something about the mating call that just pierces me.........that constant refrain of..........

" getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye " wears me down.

So I am prepared to invest as long as you take care of the husbandry.

As for your excellent Kosher idea there is the issue of circumcision to consider, you will have to capture these small aggressive creatures and perform said circumcision on them to ensure that they are producing genuinely Kosher food stuffs.

I think streetcowboy may be able to assist you in that regard.

I don't think that's really necessary. I am sure JT said he ate pork

SC

[chrisinth]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

i think there is a lot of value in your suggestion however I have to point out a couple of issues.

Personally I find it difficult to deal with Haggi during mating season, there is something about the mating call that just pierces me.........that constant refrain of..........

" getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye " wears me down.

So I am prepared to invest as long as you take care of the husbandry.

As for your excellent Kosher idea there is the issue of circumcision to consider, you will have to capture these small aggressive creatures and perform said circumcision on them to ensure that they are producing genuinely Kosher food stuffs.

I think streetcowboy may be able to assist you in that regard.

If I could make a suggestion........

In my younger days, we managed to smuggle a breeding pair of Haggi across the water to Belfast. As Blether said, the mating cry's are something to behold.

I'm surprised you never used the soothing music approach. We had this on a loop, and they were great!

Couple of things (as I'm sure you came up against; don't let them drink Bushmills, and don't let them loose and interbreed with the local wildlife. Buffalo/Hagis genre? Don't bear thinking about.

[bendejo]

Noodle Bush?

Another one running for the GOP nomination?

[theblether]

You need to be careful, you cannot guarantee the size and quality of the noodles from one plant to the next. It then takes a lot of sorting and packaging as supermarkets these days are always looking for perfection. Very labour intensive and it can eat into all your profits.

Blether

I was wondering if you would be willing to go on a joint venture out here with a Haggis farm. Over the last 4 years I have found my haggis have adapted to the heat very well and have no trouble producing more wee haggis'. We could breed them by the million here and then ship them around the world. I was thinking we could find a new market for halal haggis or kosher haggis as well.

i think there is a lot of value in your suggestion however I have to point out a couple of issues.

Personally I find it difficult to deal with Haggi during mating season, there is something about the mating call that just pierces me.........that constant refrain of..........

" getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye, getgetgetgetgetgetgetgetitrightupye " wears me down.

So I am prepared to invest as long as you take care of the husbandry.

As for your excellent Kosher idea there is the issue of circumcision to consider, you will have to capture these small aggressive creatures and perform said circumcision on them to ensure that they are producing genuinely Kosher food stuffs.

I think streetcowboy may be able to assist you in that regard.

If I could make a suggestion........

In my younger days, we managed to smuggle a breeding pair of Haggi across the water to Belfast. As Blether said, the mating cry's are something to behold.

I'm surprised you never used the soothing music approach. We had this on a loop, and they were great!

Couple of things (as I'm sure you came up against; don't let them drink Bushmills, and don't let them loose and interbreed with the local wildlife. Buffalo/Hagis genre? Don't bear thinking about.

Hmmm. an excellent suggestion.......I never thought of that.

However I am still up for the idea of watching SC circumcise a haggis.

I think I will sell tickets for that........right, now we need a venue.

[loong]

Sorry to anyone who thought that this was just a rehash of the spaghetti tree spoof. If I remember rightly that was Tomorrows World BBC program that done that.

But you have to blame it on the Blether. His growing chickens thread brought the spaghetti tree spoof to mind and I couldn't resist Asianising it. Some of the replies here have been hilarious, not least the land making machine.

Was there an official TV April fool this year? If there was I seem to have missed it.

All of you that added to this thread, thankyou, I love the humour