What Am I Doing Wrong?

[nocturn]

_{To all those who said i was a troll or smug ,cant you tell a light hearted post when you read one ? it was just showing that most of us are in happy relationships and that the ones who moan are really the "vocal" minority ,you ought to get out a bit more boys and lighten up.}

ok, i recant on smug. you are still dull though.

but i suspect that is not news.

[transam]

_{To all those who said i was a troll or smug ,cant you tell a light hearted post when you read one ? it was just showing that most of us are in happy relationships and that the ones who moan are really the "vocal" minority ,you ought to get out a bit more boys and lighten up.}

I took your post in the spirit it was written! Nothing trollish or smug about it! I dont particularly think you are in the minority, thousands of very contented farang/thai marriages around from a broad spectrum of age groups.

I notice someone decrying western women as being dour etc etc, this evening but I certainly see a fair few male posters who fit this description perfectly.

+1

The best way to irritate your ex wife is to get a younger replacement, the best way to have your ex-wife tip over into a rage of hatred is to get a younger and far far more beautiful replacement, the best way to irritate Western women of just about any age is to date and or marry one of these gorgeous Asian girls.

They cant handle the competition and the only way they can react is to demean the competition. Throw in a few slurs and hope they stick.........you will find that is the modus operandi for many Western women in regard to Thai and Asian women, to demean them.

Some Western women need to have a think about what they are saying.

I've been there, NO, not with Ben, stuff in your post.

[TommoPhysicist]

The best way to irritate your ex wife is to get a younger replacement, the best way to have your ex-wife tip over into a rage of hatred is to get a younger and far far more beautiful replacement, the best way to irritate Western women of just about any age is to date and or marry one of these gorgeous Asian girls.

It worked for me, fertile trumps post-menopausal every time.

Completely ruined my formers satisfaction of the divorce.

Then breed a load more kids to really kick them when they're down.

Edited April 18, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[mjj]

When I went back to the Uk with my wife about 8 years ago, I read in the Daily Fail newspaper that desperate men always go to Thailand to get a wife and the terrible plight these women let themslves in for. The very next week in the same newspaper they ran an article about middle aged women looking for love with African or Caribean men.

It doesnt matter which way you want it, all men are desperate and evil, the women are just looking for romance. Ho hum.

[edwinclapham]

When I went back to the Uk with my wife about 8 years ago, I read in the Daily Fail newspaper that desperate men always go to Thailand to get a wife and the terrible plight these women let themslves in for. The very next week in the same newspaper they ran an article about middle aged women looking for love with African or Caribean men.

It doesnt matter which way you want it, all men are desperate and evil, the women are just looking for romance. Ho hum.

In a similar vein, I have watched TV docs on British women (usually middle aged) holidaying in Turkey looking for love in the arms of young lovers. Everyone needs love, despite paying a huge price for it on occasions. Its the same the world over.

[KeyserSoze01]

be worried. its a extremely 18 years long bait being laid out

That's what I thought at first, but the more I dwell on it, the more I'm sure it's another insidious plot by those pesky Thai-Chinese to play the long game on the OP. 22 years is nothing to wait for the big money.

[Berkshire]

It's quite simple. Western women are pissed off that Asian women (and I don't' just mean Thai's) are taking all of the western men.

Same situation in the U.S. Thousands of attractive young Chinese women are snapping up all of the successful men.

I've sat and listened to white women complain about how they don't like the fact that Asian women are stealing all of the men. Some say it's because Asian women "do what they are told" blah, blah, blah.

As a man who has dated about a dozen Asian women (Chinese, Thai, Japanese), it's simple: I don't want a woman who wants to be more like a man than a woman.

Asian women care about how they look before they leave the house. They also care about what they eat and stay out of the sun (they know excessive tanning makes you look 50 by the time your 30).

White women (from my experience) eat like shit, don't care about wearing sweat pants when they leave the house, and spend their entire 20's laying out on the beach. By the time they hit 30, most look like a bag of dirty laundry.

I have spent ten times more dating American women then I have any Asian.

You are doing nothing wrong. It all comes down to jealousy on the part of western women.

Like the world economy: Western women stocks have tanked on the market, and Asian women stocks are rallying!!

Hmmm. I hesitated to respond to this post, but feel I must. As a man who happens to be particularly fond of Thai women, I think you are seriously misguided here. As an American who visits the US regularly, I do not see this trend that you speak of. There is no grand exodus of white guys dumping white women for Asian. There just isn't. Most farang men are in relationships with farang women. There has been an increase in interracial relationships, but this covers a broad spectrum and includes blacks and Hispanics, both men and women, with no discernible migration from white women as you suggest.

And make no mistake about it--Asian women who were born and raised in the west think exactly the same as western women. They are in fact western women who look Asian.

I think it's perfectly fine for farang men to have a preference for Thai or Asian. But you shouldn't have to justify it by bashing farang women. Not only is it illogical (e.g., a vast majority of farang men on this planet are with farang women), but it's just not cool.

[edwinclapham]

It's quite simple. Western women are pissed off that Asian women (and I don't' just mean Thai's) are taking all of the western men.

Same situation in the U.S. Thousands of attractive young Chinese women are snapping up all of the successful men.

I've sat and listened to white women complain about how they don't like the fact that Asian women are stealing all of the men. Some say it's because Asian women "do what they are told" blah, blah, blah.

As a man who has dated about a dozen Asian women (Chinese, Thai, Japanese), it's simple: I don't want a woman who wants to be more like a man than a woman.

Asian women care about how they look before they leave the house. They also care about what they eat and stay out of the sun (they know excessive tanning makes you look 50 by the time your 30).

White women (from my experience) eat like shit, don't care about wearing sweat pants when they leave the house, and spend their entire 20's laying out on the beach. By the time they hit 30, most look like a bag of dirty laundry.

I have spent ten times more dating American women then I have any Asian.

You are doing nothing wrong. It all comes down to jealousy on the part of western women.

Like the world economy: Western women stocks have tanked on the market, and Asian women stocks are rallying!!

Hmmm. I hesitated to respond to this post, but feel I must. As a man who happens to be particularly fond of Thai women, I think you are seriously misguided here. As an American who visits the US regularly, I do not see this trend that you speak of. There is no grand exodus of white guys dumping white women for Asian. There just isn't. Most farang men are in relationships with farang women. There has been an increase in interracial relationships, but this covers a broad spectrum and includes blacks and Hispanics, both men and women, with no discernible migration from white women as you suggest.

And make no mistake about it--Asian women who were born and raised in the west think exactly the same as western women. They are in fact western women who look Asian.

I think it's perfectly fine for farang men to have a preference for Thai or Asian. But you shouldn't have to justify it by bashing farang women. Not only is it illogical (e.g., a vast majority of farang men on this planet are with farang women), but it's just not cool.

Exactly so! An excellent post Berkshire thank you!

[thenervoussurgeon]

be worried. its a extremely 18 years long bait being laid out

That's what I thought at first, but the more I dwell on it, the more I'm sure it's another insidious plot by those pesky Thai-Chinese to play the long game on the OP. 22 years is nothing to wait for the big money.

She doesnt have to wait ,we have joint bank and bond accounts mind you when she drives ,i sometimes think she is trying to get rid of me ,which is dangerous as she could take herself out as well ,mind you she never goes over 20mph so i think ime safe

Edited April 19, 2012 by thenervoussurgeon

[beachyman]

taking notice of a probably, sour faced, divorced, overweight English woman is probably what you are doing wrong

Very unfair generalisation there. There are some great lasses around just maybe you have a preference for Asian girls, no harm there!

Agreed, lots of beautiful British and Europeans in general. It is usually easier to rationalize...

Was at Chang wattana today and it seems like every expat or foreigner here found the ugliest, most sour faced, haggard looking thai women imaginable. Even some young looking guys. Don't know what kind of fetish one has but strikes me odd if you wants to "upgrade" to a thai wife why one would not at least find one physically appealing.

[samsiam]

taking notice of a probably, sour faced, divorced, overweight English woman is probably what you are doing wrong

Very unfair generalisation there. There are some great lasses around just maybe you have a preference for Asian girls, no harm there!

Agreed, lots of beautiful British and Europeans in general. It is usually easier to rationalize...

Was at Chang wattana today and it seems like every expat or foreigner here found the ugliest, most sour faced, haggard looking thai women imaginable. Even some young looking guys. Don't know what kind of fetish one has but strikes me odd if you wants to "upgrade" to a thai wife why one would not at least find one physically appealing.

Exactly...but they will all say she has a wonderful personality.

[thenervoussurgeon]

taking notice of a probably, sour faced, divorced, overweight English woman is probably what you are doing wrong

Very unfair generalisation there. There are some great lasses around just maybe you have a preference for Asian girls, no harm there!

Agreed, lots of beautiful British and Europeans in general. It is usually easier to rationalize...

Was at Chang wattana today and it seems like every expat or foreigner here found the ugliest, most sour faced, haggard looking thai women imaginable. Even some young looking guys. Don't know what kind of fetish one has but strikes me odd if you wants to "upgrade" to a thai wife why one would not at least find one physically appealing.

Exactly...but they will all say she has a wonderful personality.

isnt that better than having the best looking one ,who shags your mates and steals all your money?

[Kananga]

Thais have the wrong shaped feet for shoes anyway. Capable of producing some of the most beautiful people on the planet, fron the ankles up.

[edwinclapham]

Thais have the wrong shaped feet for shoes anyway. Capable of producing some of the most beautiful people on the planet, fron the ankles up.

yes my wife complains about her "web feet" , but I still prefer them to Ugg Boots anyday!

[beachyman]

Haha, probably. But then again if those are your only two options you probably should reevaluate your life and make some pretty drastic changes to your social skills, attitude and looks before you shack up with someone. It's possible not to settle. Just saying!

[samsiam]

Exactly...but they will all say she has a wonderful personality.

isnt that better than having the best looking one ,who shags your mates and steals all your money?

You can have good looking and honest if you search enough....but I am quite shallow.

[exeter]

Now that you obviously cracked it here how do you fancy going back to the UK for another crack at things there?

[Berkshire]

Exactly...but they will all say she has a wonderful personality.

isnt that better than having the best looking one ,who shags your mates and steals all your money?

You can have good looking and honest if you search enough....but I am quite shallow.

I hope the surgeon dude is not suggesting that his wife is unattractive and, therefore, can be trusted. From all that I've seen with farangs in Thailand, the ugly gals are the ones who will shag your mates and steal all your money.

[dean999]

taking notice of a probably, sour faced, divorced, overweight English woman is probably what you are doing wrong

Very unfair generalisation there. There are some great lasses around just maybe you have a preference for Asian girls, no harm there!

Agreed, lots of beautiful British and Europeans in general. It is usually easier to rationalize...

Was at Chang wattana today and it seems like every expat or foreigner here found the ugliest, most sour faced, haggard looking thai women imaginable. Even some young looking guys. Don't know what kind of fetish one has but strikes me odd if you wants to "upgrade" to a thai wife why one would not at least find one physically appealing.

Exactly...but they will all say she has a wonderful personality.

My wife has.

[MAJIC]

_{To all those who said i was a troll or smug ,cant you tell a light hearted post when you read one ? it was just showing that most of us are in happy relationships and that the ones who moan are really the "vocal" minority ,you ought to get out a bit more boys and lighten up.}

You didn't say how much you voluntarily give her though,which could be excessive?

[thenervoussurgeon]

_{To all those who said i was a troll or smug ,cant you tell a light hearted post when you read one ? it was just showing that most of us are in happy relationships and that the ones who moan are really the "vocal" minority ,you ought to get out a bit more boys and lighten up.}

You didn't say how much you voluntarily give her though,which could be excessive?

Well i dont "give" her anything she doesnt work for me ,but if she wants something she only has to ask , i tell her all the time you can have as much as you want ,100, 200, 250 baht ,just ask.

[Beetlejuice]

This is just another Thai and Thai wife bashing thread.

The psychology being that the OP`s wife is a decent person and not a gold digger, so therefore she is unique in Thailand.

The OP believes he is being smart by wording his post in ways that will probably receive a lot of negative responses regarding Thai women.

This ploy doesn’t work with me and to answer the OPs question, what is he doing wrong? It is obvious that he has very low opinions of Thai women and a great mistrust of his own wife if he has to question her decency with complete strangers on a forum like this. I believe this poor long suffering wife should be the one having doubts about her spouse with good reason.

I agree, our thenervoussurgeon is doing something wrong and there is something wrong with him as confirmed by his own statement.

I wonder what the bottom line of the deal is here?

Edited April 19, 2012 by Beetlejuice

[nocturn]

This is just another Thai and Thai wife bashing thread.

The psychology being that the OP`s wife is a decent person and not a gold digger, so therefore she is unique in Thailand.

The OP believes he is being smart by wording his post in ways that will probably receive a lot of negative responses regarding Thai women.

This ploy doesn’t work with me and to answer the OPs question, what is he doing wrong? It is obvious that he has very low opinions of Thai women and a great mistrust of his own wife if he has to question her decency with complete strangers on a forum like this.

I agree, our thenervoussurgeon is doing something wrong and there is something wrong with him as confirmed by his own statement.

while this all may or may not be true, one thing does appear clear --- you seem to have lost your proverbial grain of salt

[thenervoussurgeon]

This is just another Thai and Thai wife bashing thread.

The psychology being that the OP`s wife is a decent person and not a gold digger, so therefore she is unique in Thailand.

The OP believes he is being smart by wording his post in ways that will probably receive a lot of negative responses regarding Thai women.

This ploy doesn’t work with me and to answer the OPs question, what is he doing wrong? It is obvious that he has very low opinions of Thai women and a great mistrust of his own wife if he has to question her decency with complete strangers on a forum like this.

I agree, our thenervoussurgeon is doing something wrong and there is something wrong with him as confirmed by his own statement.

while this all may or may not be true, one thing does appear clear --- you seem to have lost your proverbial grain of salt

Not only the proverbial grain of salt ,but the plot as well , if he bothered to read on he would have seen that i say that most marriages here are good and decent ones ,but then judging by the number of posts he has made i reckon he doesnt get out much

[transam]

This is just another Thai and Thai wife bashing thread.

The psychology being that the OP`s wife is a decent person and not a gold digger, so therefore she is unique in Thailand.

The OP believes he is being smart by wording his post in ways that will probably receive a lot of negative responses regarding Thai women.

This ploy doesn’t work with me and to answer the OPs question, what is he doing wrong? It is obvious that he has very low opinions of Thai women and a great mistrust of his own wife if he has to question her decency with complete strangers on a forum like this.

I agree, our thenervoussurgeon is doing something wrong and there is something wrong with him as confirmed by his own statement.

while this all may or may not be true, one thing does appear clear --- you seem to have lost your proverbial grain of salt

Not only the proverbial grain of salt ,but the plot as well , if he bothered to read on he would have seen that i say that most marriages here are good and decent ones ,but then judging by the number of posts he has made i reckon he doesnt get out much

With females.

[HardenedSoul]

It's quite simple. Western women are pissed off that Asian women (and I don't' just mean Thai's) are taking all of the western men.

Same situation in the U.S. Thousands of attractive young Chinese women are snapping up all of the successful men.

I've sat and listened to white women complain about how they don't like the fact that Asian women are stealing all of the men. Some say it's because Asian women "do what they are told" blah, blah, blah.

As a man who has dated about a dozen Asian women (Chinese, Thai, Japanese), it's simple: I don't want a woman who wants to be more like a man than a woman.

Asian women care about how they look before they leave the house. They also care about what they eat and stay out of the sun (they know excessive tanning makes you look 50 by the time your 30).

White women (from my experience) eat like shit, don't care about wearing sweat pants when they leave the house, and spend their entire 20's laying out on the beach. By the time they hit 30, most look like a bag of dirty laundry.

I have spent ten times more dating American women then I have any Asian.

You are doing nothing wrong. It all comes down to jealousy on the part of western women.

Like the world economy: Western women stocks have tanked on the market, and Asian women stocks are rallying!!

Absolute, unadulterated <deleted> !

I can only cringe when I think of the kind of white women you've had experience with. Eating like shit, don't care about wearing sweatpants outdoors?? Maybe you should've gone for better quality before spending your money, eh?

I know countless - yes, countless - white women back in England who wouldn't dream of leaving the house in sweat pants and, rest assured, they most certainly don't feel threatened by Asian women "snapping up all the 'successful' men". I would place a large bet against quality Western women giving a flying <deleted> about being unable to gain access to the hallowed pool of manhood represented by the current or future Thaivisa forum member demographic. The kind of men who having failed miserably with women at home, drag their sorry <deleted> over here to lower the common denominator to stark, uncomplicated currency.

When all's said and done, South East Asia is last chance saloon for a generation of dogs who, by all conventional measures, have had their day. They can come here, hook up with someone half their age and have another bite at the relationship cherry knowing such women are not only more pliable and servile but more likely to forgive indiscretions that'd have most Western women scouring the Yellow Pages for a divorce lawyer. From such a position, it's very easy to cuss down Western women but the fact remains there are literally millions of men having deep, meaningful and mutually-rewarding relationships with white women. Can these millions who date or marry white women be that wrong ?

I don't think so.

Nevertheless, I applaud the OP for the longevity of his marriage and apparent absence of the drama that afflicts an army of hapless love-buffoons in this country.

I suspect he has a personality.

[Spaniel]

I have been married for 23 years to a Thai and my experience has been the same as the OP.

[maxme]

It's quite simple. Western women are pissed off that Asian women (and I don't' just mean Thai's) are taking all of the western men.

Same situation in the U.S. Thousands of attractive young Chinese women are snapping up all of the successful men.

I've sat and listened to white women complain about how they don't like the fact that Asian women are stealing all of the men. Some say it's because Asian women "do what they are told" blah, blah, blah.

As a man who has dated about a dozen Asian women (Chinese, Thai, Japanese), it's simple: I don't want a woman who wants to be more like a man than a woman.

Asian women care about how they look before they leave the house. They also care about what they eat and stay out of the sun (they know excessive tanning makes you look 50 by the time your 30).

White women (from my experience) eat like shit, don't care about wearing sweat pants when they leave the house, and spend their entire 20's laying out on the beach. By the time they hit 30, most look like a bag of dirty laundry.

I have spent ten times more dating American women then I have any Asian.

You are doing nothing wrong. It all comes down to jealousy on the part of western women.

Like the world economy: Western women stocks have tanked on the market, and Asian women stocks are rallying!!

Absolute, unadulterated <deleted> !

I can only cringe when I think of the kind of white women you've had experience with. Eating like shit, don't care about wearing sweatpants outdoors?? Maybe you should've gone for better quality before spending your money, eh?

I know countless - yes, countless - white women back in England who wouldn't dream of leaving the house in sweat pants and, rest assured, they most certainly don't feel threatened by Asian women "snapping up all the 'successful' men". I would place a large bet against quality Western women giving a flying <deleted> about being unable to gain access to the hallowed pool of manhood represented by the current or future Thaivisa forum member demographic. The kind of men who having failed miserably with women at home, drag their sorry <deleted> over here to lower the common denominator to stark, uncomplicated currency.

When all's said and done, South East Asia is last chance saloon for a generation of dogs who, by all conventional measures, have had their day. They can come here, hook up with someone half their age and have another bite at the relationship cherry knowing such women are not only more pliable and servile but more likely to forgive indiscretions that'd have most Western women scouring the Yellow Pages for a divorce lawyer. From such a position, it's very easy to cuss down Western women but the fact remains there are literally millions of men having deep, meaningful and mutually-rewarding relationships with white women. Can these millions who date or marry white women be that wrong ?

I don't think so.

Nevertheless, I applaud the OP for the longevity of his marriage and apparent absence of the drama that afflicts an army of hapless love-buffoons in this country.

I suspect he has a personality.

I'm gonna respond with a longer post later but you are comparing England with the US and rest of Europe. Though I admit his post was abit hostile towards Western women, we do all base our own experiences from our point of view. Don't be too harsh on him

[HardenedSoul]

I'm gonna respond with a longer post later but you are comparing England with the US and rest of Europe. Though I admit his post was abit hostile towards Western women, we do all base our own experiences from our point of view. Don't be too harsh on him

A lot of guys over here have only had experience with the kind of Thai women who sell their bodies for money but that doesn't mean they're unaware of the fact that the overwhelming majority of Thai women aren't that way inclined. Even if they haven't met them. Same thing with Western women - this guy's apparently spent money on the ones possessed of characteristics that, perhaps, left a lot to be desired but he must realize that the overwhelming majority aren't like those he's experienced.

What he should've written is that the Western women he could get ate like shit and thought nothing of leaving the house in sweatpants after ruining their looks self-basting in the sun.

[TommoPhysicist]

They can come here, hook up with someone half their age and have another bite at the relationship cherry knowing such women are not only more pliable and servile but more likely to forgive indiscretions ........

Pliable and servile .........Hmmmmmm, you've never had a relationship with a Thai lady have you?

I begin to doubt you have even visited Thailand.

Edited April 20, 2012 by TommoPhysicist