To Inform Contributors In This Forum ... I Disrobed.

[fabianfred]

I chose to disrobe after two years as a monk to spend more time looking after my children at home here in Fang. They are 11 and 14 and still in school and my wife spends much time in BKK working during the last three years. We have always lived with my wife's parents in their house so my kids haven't been without care, but they need the closer attention a parent can give.

The first time I ordained for one week during a mass ordination here in Fang. The second time for these past two years. Next and third time will probably be for good, but nothing is certain...impermanence.

I expect next time will be more of a forest temple I will choose. This time was at a temple I have been involved in teaching the dhamma to foreigners since the start of the MonkforaMonth project.

Unfortunately the Thai monks and novices have not been very respectful and find us farang monks who like to try and keep the vinaya an annoying reminder that they often do not.

As the Thai saying goes... 'kap tii yuu dai, tair kap jai yuu yaak'...meaning a small tight constricted place to live is still liveable, but a small tight constricted heart makes it much more difficult to stay...

I did not want contributors to still address me as a monk.

[bankei]

Very responsible Fabian. Must have been a good experience but hard knowing your kids needed you too.

Bankei

[harrry]

All the best in your new life. There are many paths but all go to the same.

[rockyysdt]

Good luck with your new role Fred.

I have great respect for you and admire your conviction and dedication to the path.

Whether in robes or not, you are on the path.

Metta.

Rocky

[healthcaretaker]

Welcome home and all the best wishes to you, robe or disrobed, I believe you will continue to help everyone, more so now with your children added :-)

I hope your change is not effected at all by the Thai monks who have different opinions.

Do stay active here.

2 main reasons why I don't become a monk:

a ) I don't call myself a Buddhist. It just happened our beliefs and behaviours are alike;

b ) I am trying to work out a way such that a non-monk can even contribute more. I am not trying to go against Buddhism, I try to be better.

Edited June 11, 2012 by Tywais
Corrected parenthesis

[healthcaretaker]

I did not choose to add that "sun-glassed smilie" in my last message. Why did it always appear in my message ? Which button have I pressed by accident ?

[cardholder]

I did not choose to add that "sun-glassed smilie" in my last message. Why did it always appear in my message ? Which button have I pressed by accident ?

b + right parenthesis = smiley i.e.

[rockyysdt]

I am trying to work out a way such that a non-monk can even contribute more. I am not trying to go against Buddhism, I try to be better.

There are different stages in our lives some of us must/will experience.

A Buddhist Monk of many years recently confided that our modern life subjects us to countless desire episodes which produce corresponding incidences of I.

In terms of the process to Enlightenment, for most of us, a Monastic life in a forest setting might be the only way to have the environment to be able to successfully work through the four tetrads of anapanasiti.

Edited June 12, 2012 by rockyysdt

[healthcaretaker]

I am trying to work out a way such that a non-monk can even contribute more. I am not trying to go against Buddhism, I try to be better.

There are different stages in our lives some of us must/will experience.

A Buddhist Monk of many years recently confided that our modern life subjects us to countless desire episodes which produce corresponding incidences of I.

In terms of the process to Enlightenment, for most of us, a Monastic life in a forest setting might be the only way to have the environment to be able to successfully work through the four tetrads of anapanasiti.

I know. I have been trying to find others way to achieve that without giving up other desires, but failed. I guess there is no other way and no need for further improvements in Buddhism. It's really perfect !! No wonder it's consider a way of life, and not a religion.

Testing....

[Xangsamhua]

All the best, Fred.

Your children will be pleased to see more of you.

I'm sorry the Thai monks and novices made life a bit difficult, but I hope your influence will make them think a bit and be better for it.

Now enjoy your family and the householder life.

[weary]

Robes or no robes, I hope you will keep posting.

[khaowong1]

Best of luck to you Fred. I enjoy our talks we've had and I'm pretty sure we will have a few more in the future. Yes, we do annoy the Thai monks, don't we? I'm pretty sure I annoyed a few today. :-)

[Para]

Good luck with your choice I hope you find it as rewarding as you did while you were ordained.

Whilst you have asked not to be called a Monk anymore I do hope you will still hang around this section of TV and share your knowledge.

With metta

Para

[Para]

Yes, we do annoy the Thai monks, don't we? I'm pretty sure I annoyed a few today. :-)

I know what you mean on this one! For me whenever I attend large gatherings I am either the center of attention or almost (self?)made to feel like an outsider. Sometimes I wonder if some people forget Buddhism started in India not Thailand.

[Para]

I am not trying to go against Buddhism, I try to be better.

IMO with that kind of intention you are already walking the road you feel you need to find.......

[harrry]

Yes, we do annoy the Thai monks, don't we? I'm pretty sure I annoyed a few today. :-)

I know what you mean on this one! For me whenever I attend large gatherings I am either the center of attention or almost (self?)made to feel like an outsider. Sometimes I wonder if some people forget Buddhism started in India not Thailand.

I did not think budhism was about borders, or what other people though but in you.

[hookedondhamma]

Yes, we do annoy the Thai monks, don't we? I'm pretty sure I annoyed a few today. :-)

I know what you mean on this one! For me whenever I attend large gatherings I am either the center of attention or almost (self?)made to feel like an outsider. Sometimes I wonder if some people forget Buddhism started in India not Thailand.

I did not think budhism was about borders, or what other people though but in you.

Para is speaking from a viewpoint as a monk ... aka 'falang' ... if lucky, 'phra falang' :-)

[Para]

I did not think budhism was about borders, or what other people though but in you.

@harrry as my fellow Phra Hookedondhamma said my comment was from my own personal experiences as a 'Farang' Monk in Thailand.

Even FabienFred stated 'Unfortunately the Thai monks and novices have not been very respectful and find us farang monks who like to try and keep the vinaya an annoying reminder that they often do not.'

As for the comment about borders I was not referring to ones drawn up by cartographers but sadly from ones decided upon by the ego of some..

[fabianfred]

Unfortunately about 5% of Thai monks bother to try and keep to the vinaya and their 227 precepts..... and of those 5% who do, quite a few are arrogant about it and look down upon others....from one extreme to the other... IMHO.

I do not know of one single abbot in my area who goes out on alms-round, unless they are from a forest temple......and you see these monks sitting, without even blushing, during an ordination ceremony when the newly ordained monk is given his bowl and told it is his duty to go on alms-round each day!!!

[rockyysdt]

Unfortunately about 5% of Thai monks bother to try and keep to the vinaya and their 227 precepts..... and of those 5% who do, quite a few are arrogant about it and look down upon others....from one extreme to the other... IMHO.

I do not know of one single abbot in my area who goes out on alms-round, unless they are from a forest temple......and you see these monks sitting, without even blushing, during an ordination ceremony when the newly ordained monk is given his bowl and told it is his duty to go on alms-round each day!!!

In terms of Dharma änd purpose, these blushless Monks are only kidding/cheating themselves.

Imagine dedicating your whole life to a joke through improper action.

Especially if they know what improper action is.

They only have to ask themselves: " Why am l a Monk?

The word "Charade" comes to mind.

Edited June 21, 2012 by rockyysdt