Expats In Thailand: Is Your Goal Here To "Integrate" Into Thai Society?

[samsiam]

I always assumed that the goal for most expats here was curing chronic self abuse

Confucius say : Ones mans abuse is another mans pleasure

[Pseudolus]

I always assumed that the goal for most expats here was curing chronic self abuse

Confucius say : Ones mans abuse is another mans pleasure

Sums up my ex wife to a tee

[Banzai99]

On the contrary. I rather pity you and wonder why you are so negative all the time.

I often wonder at all the negativity myself, in fact I find it strangely amusing.

Many Farangs complain that the Thais can't do this and that as well as Farangs, they can't drive as well, they can't run a country as well, they can't do this they can't do that, etc etc, yet still they come.

I put this to them, Farang countries are run by Farangs and look what a freakin' mess they have made of it, such a mess in fact that you moaning whiners have CHOSEN to live in a country run by Thais.

Then you have the balls to slag them off ( of course not to their faces ) on ThaiVisa, if things are that bad for you, and you have money, you have options.

I wouldn't want to live in England so guess what, I don't, it's not too difficult a concept to understand is it ?

I wouldn't want to live out my years in Tokyo, so I spend as little time as possible here.

If I felt the same way about Thailand, I'd be outta there in a heartbeat, life's too short to be whinging all the time, if you've got money and you're not happy, move on, on your deathbed you'll be sorry you never tried to move on instead of being stuck in a place you don't like.

Strangely enough, I have never met a wealthy man in Thailand who was complaining and moaning all the time, they have a choice, they don't like it, they move on, the moaners where all old men who didn't have the wealth to choose where to live, they hated Thailand yet could not leave for lack of funds, they had made the big move by choice, albeit the wrong choice, and they are stuck there cos they have nowhere else to go, and no money to move on again, going back to their home countries is an option, but still they stay, maybe it's the feeling of failure that stops them, the big hopes, the big plans, the dream that turned into a nightmare.

And there are still people in Thailand who are amazed at the amount of Farang suicides, I'm not, in fact I'm surprised there aren't many many more.

Making the big move is more of a young mans game, you geriatrics are too set in your ways ( I mean OAP's with no more than a pittance pension, who end up living in one room and have a diet of Boiled eggs and mama ), you find it too hard to adapt, don't worry, nobody lives forever, your torment will end one day.

Sad really.

Edited June 18, 2012 by Banzai99

[tinfoilhat]

Couldn't agree with you more, and I also pointed out the link with catholic countries as well else where. My point is that you can not integrate. You can pretend to by wai'ing all the time, wearing their cloths, putting up with the day to day extortion and corruption, learning the language and all that jazz but at the end of the day, we are Farangs and those that think they are completely integrated into Thai society will find out otherwise the day that something happens in their life when the Thai's around them have to chose between what is the right thing to do (by my standards) or to come to the aid of another Thai national. In our heart of hearts, we know what will happen.

It seems we are in violent agreement. As i said earlier on this thread integration is a pipedream and not even one that seems particularly desirable or useful to me.

Enough to just get on with life, do no harm and suffer no harm done to you.

Indeed we are. I would challenge anyone who believes they are 100% integrated to do the following as I did on Saturday. I needed to get a replacement drip tray made for a BBQ. I did a CAD drawing of what I wanted, everything written in Thai, and went shopping to the metal shops. I had prices ranging from 1300 to 3000 baht and each time I saw them calculating the cost properly on their calculator (600 baht) and then writing down the vasty increased price. This was in 7 different places. In the end, I got my other half to go into the last joint and surprise surprise she came out with the paid receipt for 600 baht. You can only try your best, but you can not integrate because the Thai's will not let you. You are a Farang. Always and forever.

i had a stainless one made on Koh phangan for 800. He came to the house to see the bbq and measure and delivered it when it was done. For another 800 he made a bracket to mount the microwave under the shelves and installed it.

but metalwork not withstanding, yes i remain farang.

[Pseudolus]

Couldn't agree with you more, and I also pointed out the link with catholic countries as well else where. My point is that you can not integrate. You can pretend to by wai'ing all the time, wearing their cloths, putting up with the day to day extortion and corruption, learning the language and all that jazz but at the end of the day, we are Farangs and those that think they are completely integrated into Thai society will find out otherwise the day that something happens in their life when the Thai's around them have to chose between what is the right thing to do (by my standards) or to come to the aid of another Thai national. In our heart of hearts, we know what will happen.

It seems we are in violent agreement. As i said earlier on this thread integration is a pipedream and not even one that seems particularly desirable or useful to me.

Enough to just get on with life, do no harm and suffer no harm done to you.

Indeed we are. I would challenge anyone who believes they are 100% integrated to do the following as I did on Saturday. I needed to get a replacement drip tray made for a BBQ. I did a CAD drawing of what I wanted, everything written in Thai, and went shopping to the metal shops. I had prices ranging from 1300 to 3000 baht and each time I saw them calculating the cost properly on their calculator (600 baht) and then writing down the vasty increased price. This was in 7 different places. In the end, I got my other half to go into the last joint and surprise surprise she came out with the paid receipt for 600 baht. You can only try your best, but you can not integrate because the Thai's will not let you. You are a Farang. Always and forever.

i had a stainless one made on Koh phangan for 800. He came to the house to see the bbq and measure and delivered it when it was done. For another 800 he made a bracket to mount the microwave under the shelves and installed it.

but metalwork not withstanding, yes i remain farang.

In that you paid 200 baht too much, yup you are a farang

Edited June 18, 2012 by Pseudolus

[Radar501]

One day in Trang I was standing on the footpath at a bus stop waiting for a bus. There were other Thai people, including several senior citizens, standing there waiting.

Someone came out from the bus company office with a chair and invited me to sit down. Very polite, but I was so embarrassed.

As much as I want to fully integrate, I know this will never happen, because Thai society will always treat me different.

Edited June 18, 2012 by Radar501

[aneliane]

On the contrary. I rather pity you and wonder why you are so negative all the time.

I often wonder at all the negativity myself, in fact I find it strangely amusing.

Many Farangs complain that the Thais can't do this and that as well as Farangs, they can't drive as well, they can't run a country as well, they can't do this they can't do that, etc etc, yet still they come.

I put this to them, Farang countries are run by Farangs and look what a freakin' mess they have made of it, such a mess in fact that you moaning whiners have CHOSEN to live in a country run by Thais.

Then you have the balls to slag them off ( of course not to their faces ) on ThaiVisa, if things are that bad for you, and you have money, you have options.

I wouldn't want to live in England so guess what, I don't, it's not too difficult a concept to understand is it ?

I wouldn't want to live out my years in Tokyo, so I spend as little time as possible here.

If I felt the same way about Thailand, I'd be outta there in a heartbeat, life's too short to be whinging all the time, if you've got money and you're not happy, move on, on your deathbed you'll be sorry you never tried to move on instead of being stuck in a place you don't like.

Strangely enough, I have never met a wealthy man in Thailand who was complaining and moaning all the time, they have a choice, they don't like it, they move on, the moaners where all old men who didn't have the wealth to choose where to live, they hated Thailand yet could not leave for lack of funds, they had made the big move by choice, albeit the wrong choice, and they are stuck there cos they have nowhere else to go, and no money to move on again, going back to their home countries is an option, but still they stay, maybe it's the feeling of failure that stops them, the big hopes, the big plans, the dream that turned into a nightmare.

And there are still people in Thailand who are amazed at the amount of Farang suicides, I'm not, in fact I'm surprised there aren't many many more.

Making the big move is more of a young mans game, you geriatrics are too set in your ways ( I mean OAP's with no more than a pittance pension, who end up living in one room and have a diet of Boiled eggs and mama ), you find it too hard to adapt, don't worry, nobody lives forever, your torment will end one day.

Sad really.

Geriatric at 43?

Don't believe Bendix, he's just making stuff up to be angry at people all day, that's what he does because he's miserable himself

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

On a previous post, I invited you all for a positive debate on the powerful talent of Apichapong werasethakul.

Where were you?

[bendix]

On the contrary. I rather pity you and wonder why you are so negative all the time.

I often wonder at all the negativity myself, in fact I find it strangely amusing.

Many Farangs complain that the Thais can't do this and that as well as Farangs, they can't drive as well, they can't run a country as well, they can't do this they can't do that, etc etc, yet still they come.

I put this to them, Farang countries are run by Farangs and look what a freakin' mess they have made of it, such a mess in fact that you moaning whiners have CHOSEN to live in a country run by Thais.

Then you have the balls to slag them off ( of course not to their faces ) on ThaiVisa, if things are that bad for you, and you have money, you have options.

I wouldn't want to live in England so guess what, I don't, it's not too difficult a concept to understand is it ?

I wouldn't want to live out my years in Tokyo, so I spend as little time as possible here.

If I felt the same way about Thailand, I'd be outta there in a heartbeat, life's too short to be whinging all the time, if you've got money and you're not happy, move on, on your deathbed you'll be sorry you never tried to move on instead of being stuck in a place you don't like.

Strangely enough, I have never met a wealthy man in Thailand who was complaining and moaning all the time, they have a choice, they don't like it, they move on, the moaners where all old men who didn't have the wealth to choose where to live, they hated Thailand yet could not leave for lack of funds, they had made the big move by choice, albeit the wrong choice, and they are stuck there cos they have nowhere else to go, and no money to move on again, going back to their home countries is an option, but still they stay, maybe it's the feeling of failure that stops them, the big hopes, the big plans, the dream that turned into a nightmare.

And there are still people in Thailand who are amazed at the amount of Farang suicides, I'm not, in fact I'm surprised there aren't many many more.

Making the big move is more of a young mans game, you geriatrics are too set in your ways ( I mean OAP's with no more than a pittance pension, who end up living in one room and have a diet of Boiled eggs and mama ), you find it too hard to adapt, don't worry, nobody lives forever, your torment will end one day.

Sad really.

Geriatric at 43?

Don't believe Bendix, he's just making stuff up to be angry at people all day, that's what he does because he's miserable himself

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

On a previous post, I invited you all for a positive debate on the powerful talent of Apichapong werasethakul.

Where were you?

What am I making up? You previously stated you believed Thais to be kind based on your experiences of them on holidays and in foreign areas. Now you believe them to racist now that you live in Thai areas.

Is that not an accurate summary of your view?

As I've said, I'm not angry. I love my Thai life. Couldn't be happier with the choices I've made. I'm just baffled at your constant negativity about a place you choose to stay in. It's weird.

[ThailandCRI]

Its got to the stage now the only people I deal with in Bkk are either Chinese, Muslim or Southerners and always by personal recommendation or introduction form one of the aforementioned.

We find your input interesting. It is consistent with our own observations.

We encourage you to elaborate.

Edited June 18, 2012 by ThailandCRI

[Pseudolus]

Its got to the stage now the only people I deal with in Bkk are either Chinese, Muslim or Southerners and always by personal recommendation or introduction form one of the aforementioned.

We find your input interesting. It is consistent with our own observations.

We encourage you to elaborate.

I think you would be better to elaborate upon who you are first, and secondly, tell people what fee you are prepared to pay for their input.

[Ron19]

Its got to the stage now the only people I deal with in Bkk are either Chinese, Muslim or Southerners and always by personal recommendation or introduction form one of the aforementioned.

We find your input interesting. It is consistent with our own observations.

We encourage you to elaborate.

Is this the same type of input used to form your own observations for the other post in " My Thai Lady is Lovely "? Edited June 18, 2012 by Ron19

[Banzai99]

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

My eyes are wide open, are yours ?

You obviously have problems with your life in Thailand, you don't like it, you are negative, you are miserable, yet .....you stay, or do you ?

Are you one of the many posters that don't actually live in Thailand but are Thailand experts ?

You are 43 and moaning like a man of 73, for fawks sake man, get a grip on your life, if you're unhappy, move on, why so much drama ?

Or are you 43 and skint and can't move on ?

If you're not skint then you must be totally crazy to stay, I know I wouldn't.

OK, take this scenario, I'm your best friend, I tell you I live in ********* and I really don't like it, I don't like the people , the culture, and I think that I am victimized because of my color, I'm so unhappy I spend all my time on internet forums complaining.

What would your advice be to me, to get the heck outta dodge, if I don't like it why stay, go somewhere you like , why did you ever leave your home country ?

Just cannot understand the whiners, you don't like it , move, it's that simple unless you can't afford to move on, it's not rocket science.

[aneliane]

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

My eyes are wide open, are yours ?

You obviously have problems with your life in Thailand, you don't like it, you are negative, you are miserable, yet .....you stay, or do you ?

Are you one of the many posters that don't actually live in Thailand but are Thailand experts ?

You are 43 and moaning like a man of 73, for fawks sake man, get a grip on your life, if you're unhappy, move on, why so much drama ?

Or are you 43 and skint and can't move on ?

If you're not skint then you must be totally crazy to stay, I know I wouldn't.

OK, take this scenario, I'm your best friend, I tell you I live in ********* and I really don't like it, I don't like the people , the culture, and I think that I am victimized because of my color, I'm so unhappy I spend all my time on internet forums complaining.

What would your advice be to me, to get the heck outta dodge, if I don't like it why stay, go somewhere you like , why did you ever leave your home country ?

Just cannot understand the whiners, you don't like it , move, it's that simple unless you can't afford to move on, it's not rocket science.

Sorry you are delusional

When did I say i was skint ?

When did I say I did not like it here?

When did I say I did not like the culture ?

When did I say I did not like the people ?

Edited June 18, 2012 by aneliane

[bendix]

It's really not worth the effort sometimes.

[aneliane]

It's really not worth the effort sometimes.

Yes and no one is asking you to

[bendix]

I still can't help but chuckle a bit at the concept of someone being offended because an innocent child saw someone's big feet and called them a farang.

It's a rather surreal incident.

[aneliane]

I still can't help but chuckle a bit at the concept of someone being offended because an innocent child saw someone's big feet and called them a farang.

It's a rather surreal incident.

Yeah i would too, because this is not what happened

This is born from your twisted and perverted imagination

Sorry you can't change things around and criticize me, I am not as stupid as you might think

[BlackArtemis]

My goal? No, but my life has become very easy because I have integrate. 95% of my friends are Thai and outside of work I find myself speaking Thai exponentially more than English.

There are many things that I have learned to love about this culture and have adopted them as my own, even if I am outside of Thailand. And then there are some parts of this culture that I do not wish to become a part of, so I don't.

I have a feeling my answer would be the same no matter the country I chose to live in.

Edit: And I know, I will always be Farang. I am not trying to be Thai, just trying to adapt my life to living in Thailand.

Edited June 18, 2012 by BlackArtemis

[Ron19]

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

My eyes are wide open, are yours ?

You obviously have problems with your life in Thailand, you don't like it, you are negative, you are miserable, yet .....you stay, or do you ?

Are you one of the many posters that don't actually live in Thailand but are Thailand experts ?

You are 43 and moaning like a man of 73, for fawks sake man, get a grip on your life, if you're unhappy, move on, why so much drama ?

Or are you 43 and skint and can't move on ?

If you're not skint then you must be totally crazy to stay, I know I wouldn't.

OK, take this scenario, I'm your best friend, I tell you I live in ********* and I really don't like it, I don't like the people , the culture, and I think that I am victimized because of my color, I'm so unhappy I spend all my time on internet forums complaining.

What would your advice be to me, to get the heck outta dodge, if I don't like it why stay, go somewhere you like , why did you ever leave your home country ?

Just cannot understand the whiners, you don't like it , move, it's that simple unless you can't afford to move on, it's not rocket science.

Sorry you are delusional

When did I say i was skint ?

When did I say I did not like it here?

When did I say I did not like the culture ?

When did I say I did not like the people ?

From what I have seen on this post and another one,you use very little positive subject matter and a large amount of negatives.You won't listen to other people trying to help you with constructive criticism and your english is not as good as claimed,such as "open you eye instead criticizing."

[bendix]

Anyway, enough of all this. Let's get back on topic.

Integration. No thanks. Don't want. Cos I'm not Thai. Can't have. Because I'm not Thai. Don't care. Because I'm that hideously abused and discriminated creature. A farang. And proud of it.

To be a farang in Thailand. I can think of no more privileged and lucky position to be in.

End of discussion.

[Ron19]

I still can't help but chuckle a bit at the concept of someone being offended because an innocent child saw someone's big feet and called them a farang.

It's a rather surreal incident.

Yeah i would too, because this is not what happened

This is born from your twisted and perverted imagination

Sorry you can't change things around and criticize me, I am not as stupid as you might think

You may not be,but you are certainly not showing that here.

[aneliane]

Stop with the "don't like it here/just go"...

Open you eyeball instead criticizing

My eyes are wide open, are yours ?

You obviously have problems with your life in Thailand, you don't like it, you are negative, you are miserable, yet .....you stay, or do you ?

Are you one of the many posters that don't actually live in Thailand but are Thailand experts ?

You are 43 and moaning like a man of 73, for fawks sake man, get a grip on your life, if you're unhappy, move on, why so much drama ?

Or are you 43 and skint and can't move on ?

If you're not skint then you must be totally crazy to stay, I know I wouldn't.

OK, take this scenario, I'm your best friend, I tell you I live in ********* and I really don't like it, I don't like the people , the culture, and I think that I am victimized because of my color, I'm so unhappy I spend all my time on internet forums complaining.

What would your advice be to me, to get the heck outta dodge, if I don't like it why stay, go somewhere you like , why did you ever leave your home country ?

Just cannot understand the whiners, you don't like it , move, it's that simple unless you can't afford to move on, it's not rocket science.

Sorry you are delusional

When did I say i was skint ?

When did I say I did not like it here?

When did I say I did not like the culture ?

When did I say I did not like the people ?

From what I have seen on this post and another one,you use very little positive subject matter and a large amount of negatives.You won't listen to other people trying to help you with constructive criticism and your english is not as good as claimed,such as "open you eye instead criticizing."

oh my English is not good so I should leave the country ?

Wow that's rich considering that most NES here can't spell (jelous/jealous) and i can think of many other non natives who are not much better, how many people shall be expelled ? 10 000?

From "what you have seen", the fact is : You have STILL to find ONE line where i said I did not like it here

You just one of these "oh you can't find soy yogurt, why don't you leave the country " people, and frankly I start to get sick of that

yeah I am not listening to twisted morons, but having very interesting conversations with others just as anyone

Edited June 18, 2012 by aneliane

[aneliane]

End of discussion.

When you are aggressive to people don't pretend they don't have a right to answer and you to have the last word

[aneliane]

I still can't help but chuckle a bit at the concept of someone being offended because an innocent child saw someone's big feet and called them a farang.

It's a rather surreal incident.

Yeah i would too, because this is not what happened

This is born from your twisted and perverted imagination

Sorry you can't change things around and criticize me, I am not as stupid as you might think

You may not be,but you are certainly not showing that here.

how so?

[cardholder]

I still can't help but chuckle a bit at the concept of someone being offended because an innocent child saw someone's big feet and called them a farang.

It's a rather surreal incident.

Yeah i would too, because this is not what happened

This is born from your twisted and perverted imagination

Sorry you can't change things around and criticize me, I am not as stupid as you might think

You may not be,but you are certainly not showing that here.

how so?

You are not getting it, are you ?

[aneliane]

sure i am getting this is one of this "you can't find soy yogurt here, why don't you leave the country" type of aggression

And I am quite sick of it

especially when people turn things around and make me say what I did not say

So now can you please drop it?

[bendix]

Crikey.

I'm out.

[bendix]

Wait for it . . . . . . any second now . . .

[samsiam]

Her feet are so big she steps on everyones toes....

[aneliane]

Her feet are so big she steps on everyones toes....

Pardon me ?