Going Home

[Murgatroyd]

Many thanks, good idea.

Yes Plopmeister, I am "Captain Murgatroyd" and post on other Thailand forum boards.

After wasting the bulk of my working life in retail I moved into security work about seven years before I moved to Thailand. I worked on all sorts of sites in and around London, mostly working 12 hour night shifts. However I also have a background in doing welfare work on festival sites in the 70's and 80's and I'll be getting in touch with Showsec to see if they have any work for me. I held a SIA licence and a full first aid certificate, both of which I would have to requalify for, but that would only take a couple of days on courses.

[pipo1000]

[As for general expenses, Thailand is no longer cheap (if you actually want to 'live' and not exist that is) I cannot get by on less than 120k a month.

Oh no....here we go again...do you realise what you have done my son ?.....20 hail marys and wash your mouth out with soap right now

One has to wonder your requirements for living at 120K. OK only 2 of us, but my wife and I do fine on 30K. Bills/food/drink/truck and her fags.

Rent - 30k

Bills - 10k

School fees - 10k

Wifes debts - 15k

Housekeeping money/Food/ toiletries/clothes/gasoline etc...30k

General stuff - Going out..beers/restaurants etc...30k..

Plus mosy months something obscure will come that needs paying for - Car insurance/Healt insurance...weekend away....something gets broken...etc etc..

You're right, if you list every expense under 3 different subjects, than 120.000 Baht will be barely enough.For normal people living a good life and eating western food about half would be ample.

[KeyserSoze01]

Murgatroyd, Best wishes and best of luck in righting your financial ship. I remember reading your posts when you first made the move to Thailand and thought you had all the bases covered, but unforeseen medical expenses and the 2008 GFC are enough to derail anyone's plans.

I hope you can rebuild your nest egg and rejoin your family in Thailand when the time is right.

[pipo1000]

Many thanks, good idea.

Yes Plopmeister, I am "Captain Murgatroyd" and post on other Thailand forum boards.

After wasting the bulk of my working life in retail I moved into security work about seven years before I moved to Thailand. I worked on all sorts of sites in and around London, mostly working 12 hour night shifts. However I also have a background in doing welfare work on festival sites in the 70's and 80's and I'll be getting in touch with Showsec to see if they have any work for me. I held a SIA licence and a full first aid certificate, both of which I would have to requalify for, but that would only take a couple of days on courses.

What actually amazes me is that a married man with a child leaves his family behind and doesn't consider taking them with him.

[SimonD]

Many thanks, good idea.

Yes Plopmeister, I am "Captain Murgatroyd" and post on other Thailand forum boards.

After wasting the bulk of my working life in retail I moved into security work about seven years before I moved to Thailand. I worked on all sorts of sites in and around London, mostly working 12 hour night shifts. However I also have a background in doing welfare work on festival sites in the 70's and 80's and I'll be getting in touch with Showsec to see if they have any work for me. I held a SIA licence and a full first aid certificate, both of which I would have to requalify for, but that would only take a couple of days on courses.

Re-training opportunities are available via DWP funding, but you need to know who and how to ask - they don't lay it all out. Depending on how long you have been away from UK employment you may be surprised at the level of basic 'qualifications' now required to get even the simplest of jobs. PM me if you want any assistance. I can search for it easier here in UK.

[Murgatroyd]

pipo 1000, that's a very good point. To be fair I have talked about this with my wife... But as she would be miserable and very lonely in the UK away from her family and friends, and as my stepdaughter speaks no English the prospect of arriving in the UK with a wife and child with no home to take them to present considerable difficulties. The application process for settlement visas for them would also take some time, with little guarantee of a positive outcome. Then there would be difficulties with finding a school for the child, and the increased housing costs... I can live in a grotty bedsit, I can't impose that on my wife who owns her own house in Thailand which we've worked to improve considerably over the years that I've lived here. When I'm working and have a base to start from then we can explore that option more fully, for now it's a non starter.

Thanks SimonD, Much appreciated. I know that it isn't going to be easy, and that I may need to fund a couple of courses to re-qualify for Security work. My old company, on whom I parted from on excellent terms made a point of telling me to come back to them if I ever had to return home. I will certainly be in touch with them.

Edited June 21, 2012 by Murgatroyd

[jts-khorat]

What actually amazes me is that a married man with a child leaves his family behind and doesn't consider taking them with him.

Maybe there are special considerations in the case (I do not know Murgatryod, so I am speculating):

- the current health of his wife (or just her willingness to go to a foreign country)

- the age of the stepdaugther, does she go to school, does she even speak (good) English

- stepdauther might not mean daughter in a legal sense, with regard to Immigration

- not sure how big the hoops are to jump through to get to England, but taking the wife back to Germany would mean passing a rather complicated German language exam (minimum study time 13 weeks) in my case

- maybe finding a job, getting a place to stay and everything sorted would be wiser than having family members in culture shock as additional hurdle on top of all other complications

[jts-khorat]

pipo 1000, that's a very good point. To be fair I have talked about this with my wife...

Sorry Murgatryod, I had not seen your answer.

I am very sure you thought long and hard about it, and whatever the decision, it is a rotten one. People will be hurt and going through emotional hardship. In the end I wish all will work out well for you.

I am currently thinking extremely hard about a similar scenario (which might not have to become true, depending on changes in my circumstances over the near future, but becomes more unavoidable by the day), and I would leave my wife behind as well for at least the first 4-8 months, simply to allow me to build up an existence she can find acceptable when she finally follows -- if that is even possible in the current economic climate.

[Murgatroyd]

jts-khorat, you have my profound sympathy. It's a rotten thing to go through. I finally told my wife today, having agonised considerably about how to break the news. We were both in tears during the conversation. Whilst I know that I'm doing the right thing, and that working my way out of financial difficulties is the only viable solution it doesn't make it any easier from an emotional standpoint.

[transam]

Thanks Rsquared... Yes, my advice would be to shoulder the expense of comprehensive medical insurance for yourself and your family. I didn't and regretted it. Apart from that it's important to remember that if a person intends to live like a westerner in Thailand, drinking a familiar beer, using the air con in the evening and at night and eating western style food your living expenses won't be nearly as low as you think, and even if you don't play around with the girls a night out for a beer or several once a week or so will also add considerably to your living costs. Family and parenting adds greatly to these expenses with school fees, uniforms, school buses, extra lessons and even musical instruments to factor in!

Also don't forget things like dental care, vet's costs if you get a pet, Taxis everywhere if you don't drive and vehicle expenses if you do... finally don't forget the cost of home and contents insurance if you don't want to get home to a ransacked home.

Yes, over the last 3 years I have started taking out comprehensive medical care for myself and my 2 daughters, it aint cheap at around 2.5k USD per year but it gives me a hell of a lot less to worry about. There are a lot of people here are one serious accident/illness away from a world of nightmares, I do NOT want to end up there.

As for general expenses, Thailand is no longer cheap (if you actually want to 'live' and not exist that is) I cannot get by on less than 120k a month.

Best of luck in the UK, you never know you may even end up enjoying it! I woild like to be back now to watch the football properly.

120,000bht a month , Sounds like perhaps you need a new lady.

[JimShortz]

What a lovely positive thread (apart from the idiot with ridiculous living expenses - including his wife's rather large debts!), I almost thought I'd ended up in the wrong forum...

Love and peace...

[Murgatroyd]

Thanks Jim, much appreciated.

[pattayadingo]

Sometimes it is hard to face up to reality. Some live in this bubble of fantasy, hope and expectation and become deluded by it to the point where that bubble bursts they still cannot believe it is the end.

Life can often deal us a kick and a few more kicks when we are down as they seem to have done to you. We either get up and dust ourselves off or lie there and wither away.

At least you have seen the reality of the near and further future and been able to face up to it. Not the most pleasant reality but you can see hope for the future.

I join the others and wish you the best for that future.

[ripstanley]

Good luck with your return to the UK. Ensure that you still stay a member of this community (Thaivisa). I am very impressed with the responses on this thread. except one.

Edited June 21, 2012 by ripstanley

[transam]

Good luck chum.

Your tale tells us all what could be around the corner for any of us. BUT, we must stick together with our positive thoughts for our guys here in a dilemma. Perhaps it helps, perhaps not but l believe it does help.

[notmyself]

Re-training opportunities are available via DWP funding, but you need to know who and how to ask - they don't lay it all out

Couple of hours at the CAB then get on the phone. Even as short as a year ago I had to wait for ages to hear anything but now it takes just a couple of weeks. Maybe it is the same and I am getting better. Log everything you communicate to them and sent out post which has to be signed for at their end.

[SimonD]

Re-training opportunities are available via DWP funding, but you need to know who and how to ask - they don't lay it all out

Couple of hours at the CAB then get on the phone. Even as short as a year ago I had to wait for ages to hear anything but now it takes just a couple of weeks. Maybe it is the same and I am getting better. Log everything you communicate to them and sent out post which has to be signed for at their end.

+1 +2

I couldn't agree more with this post! Everything in writing and note all telephone conversations (date, time, person spoken to, what was said, etc). Keep copies of every letter and document. The pressure on government agencies to reduce the jobless total by any means - fair or foul - is paramount but unspoken. The help is there but grudgingly given unless you exercise your rights and due diligence. The moment you present yourself to the DWP you become an instant embarrassment to HM Government and their manipulated 'employment' figures. Research what you need and are entitled to and tell them to provide it. Be polite but firm or they will walk all over you.

[jts-khorat]

The good thing about nowadays is, that communication will be a lot easier.

As I came to Thailand 14 years ago, having a land phone line at the house was something special. I really wrote letters and postcards back to home, with answers taking one or two weeks -- it seems like the stone ages now.

Now, even Thai schoolkids have smartphones and use Facebook and Skype. Make sure you leave a computer behind, properly set up, and get something similar when back in the UK. This would not even be a major investment.

Not just talking to, but actually seeing, your loved ones will make it so much easier to get through the darker moments; or so I hope myself.

[notmyself]

I couldn't agree more with this post! Everything in writing and note all telephone conversations (date, time, person spoken to, what was said, etc). Keep copies of every letter and document. The pressure on government agencies to reduce the jobless total by any means - fair or foul - is paramount but unspoken. The help is there but grudgingly given unless you exercise your rights and due diligence. The moment you present yourself to the DWP you become an instant embarrassment to HM Government and their manipulated 'employment' figures. Research what you need and are entitled to and tell them to provide it. Be polite but firm or they will walk all over you.

You are being too kind in my view, I think it is obvious obstrification. The idea behind this is to make people give up though this is my opinion.

If anyone had read Little Dorrit by Charles Dickens then they will have heard of the 'Circumlocution Office'. This is what the DWP aims for but it can be beaten.

[MrRealDeal]

Sorry to hear about your situation but lets hope your post is WELL remembered because while you have the guts to post it my guess is this happens to a number of people. If you want to live a normal life it really is NOT some paradise of cheapness. A point I try to make clear as often as possible.

It's also VERY hard to overcome 1st world retirement and money devaluation vs 3rd world inflation and stable currency. Over the last 20 years on a fixed retirement you would have lost 50 percent of your buying power, I see the exact same monetary policys that made it happen for the last 20 years still going on for the next 20. ....... they all come from the same schools teaching the same things so it's all they know is why.

Even in the short run it can catch one off guard ..... buffets went from 99 to 139 bht overnight where I live , once the wage inflation takes hold their will be another round of inflation higher than any inflation adjusted retirement check one gets. ..... the uk gets 0 as I understand it ...... Something to really look at carefully when deciding to retire here and planing on living for 20 or more years .... 6 percent is high but not unheard of and it cuts in half your income in 10 years.

You are defenitly making the right decision. Don't adjust down just so you can stay because like you said you would just be broke eventually if not 5 probably 10 or living in a craphole eating fried rice.

[Murgatroyd]

Yes... after a while it became obvious that the financial situation wasn't going to improve, only deteriorate further. I stuck it out as long as possible but I'd be a fool to stick my head in the sand and adopt a Mr Micawber like attitude. I'm keenly aware that I'm not the only person in this position... indeed I posted to that effect several years ago.

I bought my wife a decent computer last Christmas and will leave it set up so that we can communicate easily and effectively. It has a webcam, as does mine.

I'd like to thank everyone for their fair and polite responses on this thread. It is greatly encouraging to find so much sympathy and such a lack of derision.

[transam]

Yes... after a while it became obvious that the financial situation wasn't going to improve, only deteriorate further. I stuck it out as long as possible but I'd be a fool to stick my head in the sand and adopt a Mr Micawber like attitude. I'm keenly aware that I'm not the only person in this position... indeed I posted to that effect several years ago.

I bought my wife a decent computer last Christmas and will leave it set up so that we can communicate easily and effectively. It has a webcam, as does mine.

I'd like to thank everyone for their fair and polite responses on this thread. It is greatly encouraging to find so much sympathy and such a lack of derision.

We all jest a lot on the forum about stuff but you can believe me it is a heart tugger to read your plight. We are all with you in heart. Trans.

[notmyself]

Takes a person of stout nature to open a thread like this and to continue posting on it. That alone suggests to me a bright future.

[MrRealDeal]

It's not reality that gets poor responces and people here are not mean or intolerant , it's absurd nonsense that people don't tolerate , and why should they ? ...... and the people who post absurd nonsense for some strange reason seem to think nonsense should be treated the same way as sensible topics ....... little off topic sorry

One good thing you might hang your hat on is it's possible and pretty likely that as you work and amass more wealth intrest rates will rise and you will be able to buy bonds especially corporate or preffered stocks with fixed rates at MUCH higher rates than today making round 2 a lot easier than round 1 was, pretty much everything economic was against you this time , next time it will be a lot more in your favor increasing the likelyhood of sucsess

Markets will bottom eventually , intrest rates will rise , ect ...... those things favor the older investor and those with cash

Edited June 21, 2012 by MrRealDeal

[true blue]

all the best with your decision to relocate,stay positive,keep the stress levels down,eat and sleep well.

[arthurwait]

Good luck.

[hotandhumid]

What a lovely positive thread (apart from the idiot with ridiculous living expenses - including his wife's rather large debts!), I almost thought I'd ended up in the wrong forum...

Love and peace...

Mummy, mummy...a nasty man on an anonymous internet forum is calling me names.....can you please tell him to stop.

[transam]

What a lovely positive thread (apart from the idiot with ridiculous living expenses - including his wife's rather large debts!), I almost thought I'd ended up in the wrong forum...

Love and peace...

Mummy, mummy...a nasty man on an anonymous internet forum is calling me names.....can you please tell him to stop.

Sounds like you need your mum, ooooooop's another 100,000 for her mum.

[KeyserSoze01]

What a lovely positive thread (apart from the idiot with ridiculous living expenses - including his wife's rather large debts!), I almost thought I'd ended up in the wrong forum...

Love and peace...

Mummy, mummy...a nasty man on an anonymous internet forum is calling me names.....can you please tell him to stop.

Yes, the internet is a wonderful thing when it allows anonymous twits to poke fun at people who are in dire straights. I'm sure you would have the courage to say something like this in person down at the pub, right?

[norrona]

I returned back to the U.K after 8 years of living out there...was tough at first but within a year I was kind of settled and now I can fondly look back on my time in Thailand with nothing but good happy memories...it takes guts to do it and as they say 'it is better to love and lost than to never have loved at all'

besides I prefer Thailand as holiday destination these days anyway!

and yes once upon a time I could have been quoted as one of those people who said 'England...i'm never going to live back there'

not only do circumstances change but us mortals do as well....

Best of luck