Teaching A Child The Sins Of Life.....

[samsiam]

Is it a good idea to educate a child the sins of life at a young age and let them get used to them as they grow, hopefully then appreciate the right and wrong of them and look at them in a more mature way as they know all about it and it is not a shock to the system and fun all of a sudden to abuse......I am on the fence.

I have 2 friends that practice this aspect...both with very different sins.

The first couple....they taught their 2 very well behaved, very well educated and very polite young son and daughter...circa 10/12yo.....I should say that Dad initiated this instruction...not as a couple.

He taught his 2 kids to swear like troopers....on the condition that if they ever swore in front of Mum, Grandparents or any other family members or teachers and such...there would be big trouble.

So, when they are out alone...they swear their heads off....every word imaginable. For example...driving down the road and dad nearly his another car...the son might yell out..."watch out dad ya <Edit> imbicile, you nearly hit that cokesukka in his piece of crap bucket a &lt;deleted&gt; sad excuse for a car" stuff like that.

His reasoning was that they will learn it anyway...and usually in hushed and naughty tones....so he teaches it in a fun way and to use it in its proper place..when and where etc.....it has worked as these 2 kids are the most polite and nicest kids you could meet.

The next one is a couple that teach their kid circa 10yo....to drink...well not really drink..to taste more like and appreciate the taste and use of wine mostly. He is only allowed small sips or maybe 2 mouthfuls in a glass at a time...but over a long night....sure it adds up to at least a full glass.

Again, same reasoning, teach him to appreciate it, to learn to control it and use it for what it is and not to abuse it. Cannot tell obviously until he is older if this will work....but he often comments that he prefers red wine over white.

What youse lot think ??

[NanLaew]

It is impossible to stop kids cussing in front of ANYONE after they have heard their parents cussing. Thinking that kids are able to discern who it it impolite to cuss in front of beyond parents, grandparents and family members?

Starting a 10 year-old on 'supervised' alcohol intake?

That's as much a stretch as the 'controlled' swearing IMHO.

[Ron19]

It's only my opinion but I think that's a dangerous game to play.It may work out alright and then again it may not as they get older.

[David48]

Can you be a god parent to my 3 kids please?

Just to make sure that they are in good hands in case that "that cokesukka in his piece of crap bucket a &lt;deleted&gt; sad excuse for a car" hits my car and we die ... but the kids survive.

[samsiam]

It is impossible to stop kids cussing in front of ANYONE after they have heard their parents cussing. Thinking that kids are able to discern who it it impolite to cuss in front of beyond parents, grandparents and family members?

Starting a 10 year-old on 'supervised' alcohol intake?

That's as much a stretch as the 'controlled' swearing IMHO.

Not true.....I never once in my life swore the bad words in front of my Mother or Father....ever all my life.

Bad words i mean the F's and C's etc.....my brothers nickname was '&lt;deleted&gt;'...so we sued that all the time in front of mum...like "mum, wheres &lt;deleted&gt;" etc.....but never ever and F or C word......my Dad was in construction, so he swore a lot...but I never did in front of him.....although hiding behind a fence he heard me calling my brother a 'dik faced pooh bum arsehol_e head' when i was around 10yo....that got the strap out.

[ballpoint]

"Now go and fxxxing repeat that to my mother"

Edited June 23, 2012 by ballpoint

[aneliane]

I drank Champagne at my grandparent's every Sunday and wine twice a week at home, since that age too.

So did all my cousins (I have 23)

What's your point ?

[Draup]

What the hell is a "sin of life"? Words are words - Who cares. They will learn in time.

Swearing and drinking are hardly "sins". Teach them when it's appropriate and inappropriate to use them.

[edwinclapham]

I guess there would be problems if our two told the kindy workers to get their coksukka hands off them. We do tend to be careful with our language around them, hard as it might be on occasions.

Potty mouthed kids are not attractive!

Regarding alcohol, peer pressure is immense with kids, therefore a good education on safe consummation is paramount.

Anything shocking or prohibitive will always be attractive to kids so make it as unappealing as possible by communication and family discussion.

Edited June 23, 2012 by edwinclapham

[canuckamuck]

I think modern parenting techniques are working out nicely everywhere I go. This is a golden age of respectful diligent kids and the future of our species has never been brighter.

I've got my toddlers at the gun range 3 times a week.

Edited to add:

Did you see the video on you tube of the kids heckling and threatening the 68 year old bus monitor. Beautiful stuff, I saved it so my kids can learn how superior they are to the elderly and that they should behave accordingly.

Edited June 23, 2012 by canuckamuck

[pattayadingo]

I guess there would be problems if our two told the kindy workers to get their coksukka hands off them. We do tend to be careful with our language around them, hard as it might be on occasions.

Potty mouthed kids are not attractive!

Regarding alcohol, peer pressure is immense with kids, therefore a good education on safe consummation is paramount.

Anything shocking or prohibitive will always be attractive to kids so make it as unappealing as possible by communication and family discussion.

I have to agree about peer pressure on drink and other prohibited substances.

I made sure my son attended all those classes on drugs and drink and such like when he was younger. I took him to the pub on Sundays where they were allowed to drink shandy and mingle with other drinkers so he could see a pub was not something 'special'.

Many parents were against what I did and they refused their children attendance at drug sessions / classes and the thought of taking their kids to the pub was really frowned upon.

Later in life quite a few of those kids from families who refused to educate their kids and let them understand about life turned out to be binge drinkers, some also turned to drugs.

Yes, let the children be aware of the 'sins' out there. Be a progressive parent and do not hide things from the kids because they will learn or experiment beyond your control.

[edwinclapham]

I guess there would be problems if our two told the kindy workers to get their coksukka hands off them. We do tend to be careful with our language around them, hard as it might be on occasions.

Potty mouthed kids are not attractive!

Regarding alcohol, peer pressure is immense with kids, therefore a good education on safe consummation is paramount.

Anything shocking or prohibitive will always be attractive to kids so make it as unappealing as possible by communication and family discussion.

I have to agree about peer pressure on drink and other prohibited substances.

I made sure my son attended all those classes on drugs and drink and such like when he was younger. I took him to the pub on Sundays where they were allowed to drink shandy and mingle with other drinkers so he could see a pub was not something 'special'.

Many parents were against what I did and they refused their children attendance at drug sessions / classes and the thought of taking their kids to the pub was really frowned upon.

Later in life quite a few of those kids from families who refused to educate their kids and let them understand about life turned out to be binge drinkers, some also turned to drugs.

Yes, let the children be aware of the 'sins' out there. Be a progressive parent and do not hide things from the kids because they will learn or experiment beyond your control.

My sentiments entirely!

[LucidLucifer]

If you walk around a secondary school in the UK at break or lunch you will hear a level of profanity worse than you'll pretty much hear anywhere else.

Your friend has an unusual method and it isn't one i'll be subscribing to, but I'm not going to critisise it. It is giving the kids an awareness of the language, and also when or it is or isn't appropriate.

As with drinking, my parents would always let me have a small glass of wine during Sunday lunch and a small beer if we went out at Christmas or on when on holiday. I think it helped me to generally avoid achohol in excess.

I didn't start drinking heavily until I was about 25, and that had probably more to do with circumstances and where I was (Thailand) than anything else.

[Geekfreaklover]

Children mimic their parents and their peers. If there is a lot of swearing taking place around them then they will swear. If there is no consequence to their swearing they will continue to swear.

Drinkng and drug see above. If it is considered normal behaviour to drink then they will do it. If it is considered normal behaviour to drink excessively then they will do so. If there is no consequence then they will continue to do so. If a child suffers from a compulsive personality then he or she will not be able to comprehend the consequences of compulsive behaviour and will require pyshcological help from an outside source.

The best parenting we can give is by setting an example by NOT drinking to excess and NOT swearing when the kids are present.

Edited June 23, 2012 by Geekfreaklover

[BigJohnnyBKK]

My parents were European and we were served wine with dinner from as far back as I can remember, from maybe 10-12 on my Dad made a big point of educating us on its finer points, and I was allowed to drink beer from 13-14 on, no harm done.

And the swearing thing sounds fine, sounds like a very healthy Dad.

Of course kids know themselves, don't need to even be "taught", that different behaviour is acceptable in different circumstances, farting to get a giggle out of your friends but not in front of grandma, blowing your nose in front of farang but not Thais that's just normal common sense isn't it.

[Ricardo]

I guess there would be problems if our two told the kindy workers to get their coksukka hands off them. We do tend to be careful with our language around them, hard as it might be on occasions.

Potty mouthed kids are not attractive!

Regarding alcohol, peer pressure is immense with kids, therefore a good education on safe consummation is paramount.

Anything shocking or prohibitive will always be attractive to kids so make it as unappealing as possible by communication and family discussion.

I have to agree about peer pressure on drink and other prohibited substances.

I made sure my son attended all those classes on drugs and drink and such like when he was younger. I took him to the pub on Sundays where they were allowed to drink shandy and mingle with other drinkers so he could see a pub was not something 'special'.

Many parents were against what I did and they refused their children attendance at drug sessions / classes and the thought of taking their kids to the pub was really frowned upon.

Later in life quite a few of those kids from families who refused to educate their kids and let them understand about life turned out to be binge drinkers, some also turned to drugs.

Yes, let the children be aware of the 'sins' out there. Be a progressive parent and do not hide things from the kids because they will learn or experiment beyond your control.

I too follow this example, and am happy to let my kids drink a shandy, or take a swig of my beer, and learn about its' effects while I can keep-an-eye on them. Thus they learn when to stop.

They tell me that they have to struggle slightly keep a straight-face at school, when the dangers-of-drugs/drink lessons are held, but they appreciate that we trust them, and follow our own way because we care about them.

But it was frustrating to find, when taking them 'home' to the UK, that kids can't have a weak-shandy, under parental-supervision in the pub-garden, as I remember doing in my own childhood-days. Thailand is far more free, in that respect, at least.

As regards spirits, a drop of Daddy's whisky/gin, on their tongues when they were small, rapidly cured any desire to try those grown-up drinks, when we aren't looking !

But what about another so-called 'sin' ? That of 'horizontal-jogging' ? While I laughed at the Monty-Python sketch about this being demonstrated in-school, I'm damned if I'm going to volunteer, for that !

My view is that, if certain 'sins' are experienced, under carefully-supervised conditions, then our warnings against smoking tobacco or sampling hard-drugs, are more-likely to be respected and taken-seriously.

[samsiam]

I drank Champagne at my grandparent's every Sunday and wine twice a week at home, since that age too.

So did all my cousins (I have 23)

What's your point ?

So you are an example of what can be achieved by drinking from an early age.

Not sure if that is in the pro or con basket yet though.

On second thoughts....perhaps if you have no idea what the point is !!!

[pattayadingo]

I guess there would be problems if our two told the kindy workers to get their coksukka hands off them. We do tend to be careful with our language around them, hard as it might be on occasions.

Potty mouthed kids are not attractive!

Regarding alcohol, peer pressure is immense with kids, therefore a good education on safe consummation is paramount.

Anything shocking or prohibitive will always be attractive to kids so make it as unappealing as possible by communication and family discussion.

I have to agree about peer pressure on drink and other prohibited substances.

I made sure my son attended all those classes on drugs and drink and such like when he was younger. I took him to the pub on Sundays where they were allowed to drink shandy and mingle with other drinkers so he could see a pub was not something 'special'.

Many parents were against what I did and they refused their children attendance at drug sessions / classes and the thought of taking their kids to the pub was really frowned upon.

Later in life quite a few of those kids from families who refused to educate their kids and let them understand about life turned out to be binge drinkers, some also turned to drugs.

Yes, let the children be aware of the 'sins' out there. Be a progressive parent and do not hide things from the kids because they will learn or experiment beyond your control.

I too follow this example, and am happy to let my kids drink a shandy, or take a swig of my beer, and learn about its' effects while I can keep-an-eye on them. Thus they learn when to stop.

They tell me that they have to struggle slightly keep a straight-face at school, when the dangers-of-drugs/drink lessons are held, but they appreciate that we trust them, and follow our own way because we care about them.

But it was frustrating to find, when taking them 'home' to the UK, that kids can't have a weak-shandy, under parental-supervision in the pub-garden, as I remember doing in my own childhood-days. Thailand is far more free, in that respect, at least.

As regards spirits, a drop of Daddy's whisky/gin, on their tongues when they were small, rapidly cured any desire to try those grown-up drinks, when we aren't looking !

But what about another so-called 'sin' ? That of 'horizontal-jogging' ? While I laughed at the Monty-Python sketch about this being demonstrated in-school, I'm damned if I'm going to volunteer, for that !

My view is that, if certain 'sins' are experienced, under carefully-supervised conditions, then our warnings against smoking tobacco or sampling hard-drugs, are more-likely to be respected and taken-seriously.

It was in the UK where I took my son to the pub. Sunday afternoons were more relaxed and as long as the kids behaved themselves and left before 9 p.m. there was never a problem. Good grounding for kids.

As to the rest of your post, I do agree.

My son never got into drugs. he often had his friends around in his late teens ( 18+ ) and they used to drink. Some did not know how to behave and those ones nicknamed me Rottweiler when I really let rip at them, telling them if they abused this privilege again they would never be allowed back in the house. And as mine was the only house they could all go to together, those couple who did not know how to conduct themselves soon learned

We all have our own ways to try and educate our children and sometimes their friends and we want the best for them. If we succeed that is a great bonus

[krisb]

My Grandfather gave me a small glass of stout that he used to make, with dinner at their house far back as I can remember so from like 5 i suppose. My parents always gave us small sips of their drinks at parties or dinner etc. It would of been a couple glasses worth a night at parties they had cause Id get some from them both. Honestly, big deal. Its fine. Swearing wasnt overly allowed although we didnt get punished I mean my folks used occasional swear words themselves and tv uses plenty of swear words so what do parents expect. Now if the kids are lighting up smokes at 10 now thats a problem and a whole new thread

[ebmzlm]

Both parents are a pair of idiots.

"monkey see, monkey do"

My son is 2 and half, if he blurts out a swear word he is ignored, and knows himself, it's not to be said.

I spend more time teaching how to use a computer and iPad, obviously as well as reading books, drawing etc....

Why would anyone in there right mind influence their children in this way??

[PattayaParent]

My kid learnt as a 2 year old to say "&lt;deleted&gt; idiot" when I was behind the wheel of a car in Thailand. She has heard me swear and realises it's a reaction in anger and not in normal coversation.

She has drank beer and has no liking of it but maybe that will change with the years?

As for drugs I will tell her to come talk to me about them as I have experience and can hopefully influence any moderate use.

Edited June 23, 2012 by PattayaParent