I Now Realise That Something Is Missing In Life .......

[arthurwait]

I think the difference is many Western guys in Thailand (based on some of the comments on this forum) choose their Thai wife based on her looks and (dare I say) "dancing" skills, with little consideration for personality and compatibility.

Have to agree with that. If a guy's spent most of his dating/married life in Farangland with what could be best described as "aesthetically unexciting" women then it's understandable why he'd go for the "lookers" over here. Unfortunately, their looks are usually all they have going for them and those don't last much past 35-40. Gives some TV members - no names - a good 17-20 years of ogling, eh?

what I miss most is a proper kiss. a proper snog. western women know how to kiss. thai women don,t.

Only if the Western woman has clean teeth. Often they don't. Thai women mostly do.

The really cute thing about Thai women is the "sniff kiss". If you don't know what that means, you have stayed for too long with the bar scene or you should shower more often

The "sniffkiss" is wondrous. I love it. Always makes me smile

Especially if you fart at the same time.

[fletchsmile]

I always found it quite easy to find a girlfriend in Thailand. To find a wife or serious long term girlfriend though for me Thailand ranks as one of the most difficult places I've lived in Asia to find a real soul mate. Having lived in Singapore, Indonesia, Korea and spent time in Malaysia, Phillipines etc each of those countries were easier to find what I'm looking for. A lot of it comes down to society, culture, values, (even on the positive sides) and on the negative side things like racism, brainwashed nationalism, prejudice and stereotyping towards foreigners also play a part. Not to say there aren't a lot of nice ladies here - there are - just not particularly my style. So yes I can share your thoughts on something missing.

Took me about 7 years to before I found someone I thought I could really settle down with. In contrast other Asian countries I'd met much more marriage potential in much shorter time frames, just circumstances didn't work out.

So I guess 2 messages on that score: 1) If your looking for real serious girl-friend material I wouldn't necessarily choose Thailand, and there are plenty of other countries in Asia with lovely ladies too. 2) These things happen when you least expect it, and often when you're not looking.

So yes I eventually married a Thai. I jokingly say though if I'd spent 7 years in a jungle I'd have found the right monkey too! Which leads me on to another couple of messages:

3) It doesn't harm to put yourself in the right environment to improve your odds of where you are though; and 4) I wouldn't try looking in Pattaya for the very reasons you mention, including that many decent Thais don't have a high opinion of farang in Pattaya and you're stereotyped before they've even met you. Not to say it can't be done there, but back to 3) go somewhere else and improve your odds.

And a last one... remember everyone has a friend. While to find the right partner wasn't easy, I did have a lot of nice female friends, and still do, who of course have friends. Those two nurses sound a good start...

Edited July 2, 2012 by fletchsmile

[farang000999]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

[Bender]

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

I would say what is more funny is that few guys would even touch a prostitute back home but in Thailand many Western guys marry them.

Sent from iPhone; please forgive any typos or violations of forum rules

And about these thai bar girl, even a thai man will never, ever marry them. The asinity thing is western do it here .

After we wonder why some thai look at us like creeps.

Edited July 2, 2012 by Bender

[Johnniey]

Thats one thing i miss with women back at home,you can talk about movies,music,old school friends,worldly experiences,sometimes i find the cultural differences here too much

You can do the same with women here, believe it or not.

[Johnniey]

Before you say "Bangkok is not my scene..." Try to take some days here, where you get OUT of central bangkok - there are so many nice, green area's - and many friendly girls, that will not see you as, at walking ATM - but a good alternative to a Thai guy, who is to lazy, beats her up and uses her salary getting pissed up on Sangsom

But Khon Kaen is a nice city, i like it a lot...and 5km out of town, there are green and nice :-)

It used to be, even 5 years ago - too many old farang now.

[flying]

Just IMHO would like to add....

For all the guys who say ultimately the foreign/Thai relationships

will be limited because the Thai women cannot interact like the women back home can... talk about movies, friends,worldly experiences etc

Well....that will depend as always entirely on the woman your with.

The same can be said of many women from your own country who have no interest in what your interested in.

My wife & I lived in the USA for 5-6 years. She already spoke English quite well but when she arrived she attacked it

with a purpose. Secured a job in the medical field & then attacked that to learn all the technical terms in her new local language.

At home she was always watching the world news channels armed with her talking dict to help her out when she did not understand something.

Then she started watching cooking shows...not to learn to cook as she was already an excellent cook...but to learn to listen to the different accents.

I can honestly say there is no subject we cannot talk about. But that is all down to her making the effort to expand *her* horizons.

That we are interested in similar things helped of course.

I have to add....how about the opposite scenario?

Do you wonder if there are web sites like Mia Farang?

Do Thai girls married to foreigners post there asking if others are a bit tired by their foreign husbands inability to

talk about anything Thai? That their husbands lack *Asian* experience & can barely speak?

Know little or nothing of Thai history, customs etc?

So I think it is a double edged sword. Now that we live here in Thailand I am the one mimicking the effort she

made in the USA...actually I have been trying even since day one even in the US but now a much more concentrated effort.

If I am half as successful as her I will be quite happy

Edited July 3, 2012 by flying

[pigeonjake]

flying thats a great post mate,

the trouble here in my opinion is that the men come here and are spoilt for choice, so they dont put to much effort into the relationship, thinking if it goes wrong ill just go out and find another lady,

now as for girls who sell there body to help keep there family, well these girls have my utmost respect

[pigeonjake]

and to the op, go for it mate move away,

if there is such a thing as hell on this earth, then that place is pattaya, all the people who live there doing the things they do every nite, they come on here saying bar girl this and hooker this, they want to stand there and look in the miror, becouse without people like them chasing these girls it wouldnt be there, so who is the bad person, the lady who is selling her body to keep her family alive, or the people there taking advantage of the situation??? ask yourself that,!!

i live in a quiet village we have a pig farm,chickens, ducks, fish, but most of all we have each other, and no matter how long you stay in hell youll never get that,

just my opinion, jake

[hotandhumid]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

Oh dear. Could you possibly be any more cringeworthy??

[JurgenG]

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

I would say what is more funny is that few guys would even touch a prostitute back home but in Thailand many Western guys marry them.

If 60% of women in the UK were on the game, I'm sure 60% of men in the UK would marry one. (insert own percentage if dissatisfied with mine)

More to do with opportunity than moral choice I think.

If your meaning is 60% of women in Thailand are somehow associated with prostitution, we live in completely different worlds, my own percentage would be around 1%.

There are places with big concentration of this ladies and their customers but in my village in Bangkok you wouldn't be able to find even one. And in the village where I stay in Isan, maybe 6-7 which probably represents 60% of the local women married to foreigners but no more than 1% of the local female population.

[Berkshire]

If 60% of women in the UK were on the game, I'm sure 60% of men in the UK would marry one. (insert own percentage if dissatisfied with mine)

More to do with opportunity than moral choice I think.

If your meaning is 60% of women in Thailand are somehow associated with prostitution, we live in completely different worlds, my own percentage would be around 1%.

There are places with big concentration of this ladies and their customers but in my village in Bangkok you wouldn't be able to find even one. And in the village where I stay in Isan, maybe 6-7 which probably represents 60% of the local women married to foreigners but no more than 1% of the local female population.

I agree with you that out of the total Thai female population, 1% or less are "on the game," as Tommo put it (includes BGs and non-BGs who may be farang-hunters nevertheless). But perhaps he's referring to Thai women who associate with farangs...? Then 60% might be pretty close.

[tim armstrong]

Have a look at Nakhon Sawan. It used to be a sleepy country town. It's now the fastest growing regional centre in Thailand, with massive infrastructure development happening. The city has100,000 people, with the largest thai/chinese community in the country. Partly because of this, it has a very well educated population of attractive professional women. Its also not that far from anywhere. Maybe not much night life but sounds like that's not a priority.

[arthurwait]

Have a look at Nakhon Sawan. It used to be a sleepy country town. It's now the fastest growing regional centre in Thailand, with massive infrastructure development happening. The city has100,000 people, with the largest thai/chinese community in the country. Partly because of this, it has a very well educated population of attractive professional women. Its also not that far from anywhere. Maybe not much night life but sounds like that's not a priority.

Larger than Bangkok and towns on the Eastern Seaboard ?

[GreenSnapper]

Have a look at Nakhon Sawan. It used to be a sleepy country town. It's now the fastest growing regional centre in Thailand, with massive infrastructure development happening. The city has100,000 people, with the largest thai/chinese community in the country. Partly because of this, it has a very well educated population of attractive professional women. Its also not that far from anywhere. Maybe not much night life but sounds like that's not a priority.

Never been there, but I heard that it's also one of the hottest places in the country. No?

[kerryk]

Move to Rayong, or Chonburi city, or Sriracha etc... all close to Pattaya (easy to go back and visit friends), but totally different scene.

Yep beat me to it.

I don't know much about Rayong, but I know Chonburi City and Sri Racha. As said they are completely different scenes with plenty of industry and wealthy Thais.

Chonburi City is brimming with wealthy Thai-Chinese who built the city and so much employment is provided by them and especially Amata Nakorn that there's plenty of independently wealthy, well educated girls here either in employment or running their parents businesses. Several hospitals for nurses too. Very few Farangs though.

Sri Racha has many more farangs and much better nightlife for farangs/Japanese. Many more better looking restaurants/ westernisedish bars/restaurants. Chonburi struggles at this. SR also has two large private hospitals for nurses. It's a much nicer looking town than Chonburi as well.

Although it does have many adult entertainment bars mainly aimed at the Japanese that you could end up meeting a girl that works in them pretending she doesn't.

Or Bang Saen inbetween, although much better to stroll along to a bar (unless I've missed places) there isn't much more there except the beach and university so meeting someone above university age maybe more difficult.

Thai Chinese alert ooooogaaaa oooooogaaaa. If a women tells you she is Thai/Chinese run like the dickens.

[kerryk]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

It is really hard to take a person who would post something like or like that post seriously. Do you know who lives in Pattaya? They are too important for me to talk about on Thai Visa.

A person is a person. Body and soul and not the sum total of where one lives. Can one get any more petty? How about how far away from Pattaya you live? 1 mile? 2 miles? 20 miles? How far is Bangkok? Is it past your contaminated zone? How about knowing people from Pattaya? Or associating with people from Pattaya? Or calling people in Pattaya? Should you disinfect the phone?

[kerryk]

Before you say "Bangkok is not my scene..." Try to take some days here, where you get OUT of central bangkok - there are so many nice, green area's - and many friendly girls, that will not see you as, at walking ATM - but a good alternative to a Thai guy, who is to lazy, beats her up and uses her salary getting pissed up on Sangsom

But Khon Kaen is a nice city, i like it a lot...and 5km out of town, there are green and nice :-)

It used to be, even 5 years ago - too many old farang now.

Karma. I have seen too much not to believe.

[kerryk]

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

I would say what is more funny is that few guys would even touch a prostitute back home but in Thailand many Western guys marry them.

Sent from iPhone; please forgive any typos or violations of forum rules

That you haven't figured out that you live in Thailand is amazing. You know you really should get some Thai cultural experience. This is not the UK Thai prostitutes are not the same as prostitutes from the UK. I could detail why but we are not supposed to discuss the specifics of prostitution on Thai Visa so I wont. There are men reading this who know a thousand Thai prostitutes. You know none. Gee who would you ask?

[kerryk]

I am surprised no one has told the poor guy how to find a good girl in Pattaya. I can't be the only man who knows?

[arthurwait]

Move to Rayong, or Chonburi city, or Sriracha etc... all close to Pattaya (easy to go back and visit friends), but totally different scene.

Yep beat me to it.

I don't know much about Rayong, but I know Chonburi City and Sri Racha. As said they are completely different scenes with plenty of industry and wealthy Thais.

Chonburi City is brimming with wealthy Thai-Chinese who built the city and so much employment is provided by them and especially Amata Nakorn that there's plenty of independently wealthy, well educated girls here either in employment or running their parents businesses. Several hospitals for nurses too. Very few Farangs though.

Sri Racha has many more farangs and much better nightlife for farangs/Japanese. Many more better looking restaurants/ westernisedish bars/restaurants. Chonburi struggles at this. SR also has two large private hospitals for nurses. It's a much nicer looking town than Chonburi as well.

Although it does have many adult entertainment bars mainly aimed at the Japanese that you could end up meeting a girl that works in them pretending she doesn't.

Or Bang Saen inbetween, although much better to stroll along to a bar (unless I've missed places) there isn't much more there except the beach and university so meeting someone above university age maybe more difficult.

Thai Chinese alert ooooogaaaa oooooogaaaa. If a women tells you she is Thai/Chinese run like the dickens.

Only in your make believe world, only in your make believe world Walter.

[TommoPhysicist]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

It is really hard to take a person who would post something like or like that post seriously. Do you know who lives in Pattaya? They are too important for me to talk about on Thai Visa.

A person is a person. Body and soul and not the sum total of where one lives. Can one get any more petty? How about how far away from Pattaya you live? 1 mile? 2 miles? 20 miles? How far is Bangkok? Is it past your contaminated zone? How about knowing people from Pattaya? Or associating with people from Pattaya? Or calling people in Pattaya? Should you disinfect the phone?

Gotta say I normally agree with you Kerry ....... BUT in this case I have to side with farag69.

Pattaya is anathema to most Thai ladies, once when dining with a friend, he said the 'P' word TOO loud, the waitress then refused to serve our table again. And I've seen that sort of thing happen time and again.

A guy mentions Pattaya and many Thai girls won't look at him or come near him ever again.

Edited July 3, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[Johnniey]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

It is really hard to take a person who would post something like or like that post seriously. Do you know who lives in Pattaya? They are too important for me to talk about on Thai Visa.

A person is a person. Body and soul and not the sum total of where one lives. Can one get any more petty? How about how far away from Pattaya you live? 1 mile? 2 miles? 20 miles? How far is Bangkok? Is it past your contaminated zone? How about knowing people from Pattaya? Or associating with people from Pattaya? Or calling people in Pattaya? Should you disinfect the phone?

Come on, you know what the guy means. Sure, there are important people live there.

If a foreigner is single male and moves there for other reasons than work, he'd be a liar if he said he weren't there for the availability of poor, uneducated, exploited up-country Thai girls who will sleep with them for a couple of dollars.

Good beach, my arse.

[kerryk]

Even as a male, it's hard to take another farang who lives in Pattaya serious.

It is really hard to take a person who would post something like or like that post seriously. Do you know who lives in Pattaya? They are too important for me to talk about on Thai Visa.

A person is a person. Body and soul and not the sum total of where one lives. Can one get any more petty? How about how far away from Pattaya you live? 1 mile? 2 miles? 20 miles? How far is Bangkok? Is it past your contaminated zone? How about knowing people from Pattaya? Or associating with people from Pattaya? Or calling people in Pattaya? Should you disinfect the phone?

Gotta say I normally agree with you Kerry ....... BUT in this case I have to side with farag69.

Pattaya is anathema to most Thai ladies, when a friend said the word TOO loud, a waitress refused to serve our table.

And I've seen that sort of thing happen time and again.

A guy mentions Pattaya and many Thai girls won't look at him or come near him ever again.

I associate with engineers both male and female from Bangkok and Rayong and have never had this problem. Maybe it is who I am with. Currently I am spending 10 million baht on a purchase from a female sales person who lives in Pattaya. Not a problem. Plus you know who that we can't talk about lives in Pattaya.

[TommoPhysicist]

I associate with engineers both male and female from Bangkok and Rayong and have never had this problem. Maybe it is who I am with. Currently I am spending 10 million baht on a purchase from a female sales person who lives in Pattaya. Not a problem. Plus you know who that we can't talk about lives in Pattaya.

I agree, more about who you are ...... (sorry missed the 'with')

Your 'rep' is already so far down the toilet, that whatever you say or do, can't make it any worse.

Edited July 3, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[kerryk]

I am driving two hours to meet two British engineers for lunch. Both are married. We are meeting in Pattaya because the food is better than Rayong and I don't want to drive all the way to Bangkok. The hotels in Pattaya have full schedules of meetings and banquets from Thai companies all year long. Thai people don't care. It is in your all's head.

New construction in Pattaya is awesome. New hotels and new condos and new homes. New Central Mall. The place is jumping. You are old fashioned guys with your heads stuck in the sands of moral indignation of years back.

Thais like Pattaya as do most everyone else except a few narrow minded people on Thai Visa.

Go and see. Go see the new hotels the new wineries. The new entertainment attractions. But before you slag the place of at least go look!

[Pseudolus]

Has anyone suggested that the OP hooks up with the other chap who posted that he has a normal girl he is too scared to make the move on, who brings her friend / sister along with her on dates? She has a chaperone, only fair he gets a wing man.

[KeyserSoze01]

My advice to the OP is to get a dog. Seriously, a dog will provide companionship, unrequited love and devotion. Plus dogs have never been known to use a claw hammer on you when you're asleep.

[phl]

As a single man living in Pattaya, for 5 or so years now, though overall over 10, i think you should wait with the move.

You have just reached the 1 year crisis, there is also 2 and 3 -lol

Udon, KonKaen and others will not solve the problem, because a huge majority of bar girls come from those places.

If you do not work or have a business, it makes it even harder, because you do not get to meet the non bar girls.

I did also try the dating sites and while had no problem about where i live, i found most girls i met were ex hookers or "undercover" hookers.

Just relax, stop looking so hard, take a break and go for a holiday around Thailand, never know who you will meet

PS. Took me 10 years to meet someone as you describe, and now taking months to get close

[tim armstrong]

Well maybe Nakhon Sawan doesn't have the largest chinese thai / community if you include Bangkok, - but yes, if you don't. It has a very interesting history as a trading centre, and Its no hotter than many other places further north.

But for sure to the real point, it does have many beautiful women who are not interested in a short time adventure.