Village Wedding Cost

[xybadog]

Tried searching for information on the approximate cost of a village wedding but only come up with info on sinsod so I'm starting a new thread.

Can anyone give me an idea, from experience, of the approximate cost of a wedding in a rural village? I know it would be dependent of the numbers of "guests" who turn up but a ball park figure would be fine. I don't want to be ripped off. Not asking for sinsod to be included because this isn't going to be an issue as not asked for

Also, as an alternative, anyone have an experience of getting married at a resort (just bride, groom and witnesses) and then returning to the family home? Is this showing disrespect to the family by doing something like this?

[Mario2008]

Depends on what you offer. Normally you hire a caterer, who will charge around 1,000 baht for a table with food for 8 persons (excluding drinks). Then comes the booze and drinks. Also you can have a brunch and at night a party.

You can also have a singer and dancers on a stage, which will cost extra.

Note that the guests wil give you and your wife envelopes with money, normally that will about cover the cost of the food. (depending on how well to do the guests are of course).

The wedding is a big affair, don't make it private. That will be a disapointment for the family.

Other costs are for wedding photo's and hiring of costoms, doing the misses make-up, the music and the announcer, (transportation of) the monks and food for them.

[bangkokburning]

I estimated my costs and drew up a spreadsheet. My gf aand I found some prices too low so I adjusted them as needed. We are having 8 tables, 8 monks, small amnt of flowers, etc...Costumes (2), makeup (4), photos. Food for evening before and wedding = 14k. I'm in it now about 65k but this also incls invites and postage to usa for bulk box. Also incls transport and expenses for family to get from bkk to Sisaket half by plane via UBP. Addl exp still to come - 1.5k small money to hand out and 15k gift to her parents, my gf will also contribute 15k. It is a gift, not sin sot. We also have costs of platinum ring (1) and titanium ring (2) as well as honeymoon in Singapore (5 days). Just the wedding, I am in it for about 67k incl transport. I expect no more than 5k expenses from nowhere. My per table is about 1150 plus Blend 750ml plus beer. Yes, I am a cheap bastard but considering I will know about a dozen people there, Im good with it. Being this is the family home and not her parents actual home I am less inclined to spend as it is entirely for Mom's face. I take very good careof their 36yo unwed daughter. I personally think lavish weddingsare a huge waste of money, so mom ain't gonna ever overcome that hurdle— esp when my family will not be included and I am the one paying. We will have addl reception next year in usa and btw that will be her 4th trip to us and perhaps a dozen abroad.

Edited August 23, 2012 by bangkokburning

[bangkokburning]

Oh btw, small village outside Sisaket. DONT GET MARRIED AT A HOTEL. I just went to one and while all brides urban friends and grooms teacher buddies were as well— we were friends of brides parents. They despite living in bkk were not ok with all the fanciness. I think they also would have liked the money in pocket, me too! I had to laugh as people would fill their plates high and bring back to table for all to share— love it. Will be cheaper and folks will be happier in the village. At least keep it local if you must opt for hotel.

Edited August 23, 2012 by bangkokburning

[bangkokburning]

sorry for crappy spelling, format...firefox beta on Google7 tablet. Not happy with it at all.

[xybadog]

Thanks for the replies guys.

@bangkokburning - 67000 baht sounds very cheap, or should I say, cheaper than I expected. Nevertheless I suppose if I budget 100,000 baht I don't have to spend all of it (I just won't tell the gf's family that's my budget :-) ) I'm guessing, with the rings and the 5 day honeymoon in S'pore will at least double that 67000 baht though?

Am I right in thinking that normally, at thai weddings, they are pretty much open invitations to pretty much the whole village?

[JeffreyMcCollum]

When was the last time you were in Singapore ? From a few years back prices are now 3 or 4 time higher.

Back on track. . . .

My wife and I got married at the Amphor (Sorry about any spelling errors) then a while later had a party in the parents village. Everyone helped cook and make things. (we purchased the food) I am highly against supporting the neighborhood drunks, so other than coke, water, and tea, none was supplied and I don't think it was missed., A few guest brought some. Just helps keeps fighta and stupidness to a minimum. (I have been to many a weddings were someone takes bottels from the tables and carts them off to their home) Everyone (about 100 people) sat around the home inside or outside. Party lasted about 4 - 5 hours talkking, eating, and games for the kids. And the next day many returned to help clean up. Cost was abuut 20,000 Bt and now every year we do a party of the year. With slight tweeks from what we did or leared the year prior.

Now if your out to show off, or impress everyone in the village of your wealth or power, go whole hog and over the top. I have even been to wedding that had pole dancers and strippers, Persoanlly thinking it was out of line but all the drunks like it. But flant too much and you will be setting the tone for years to come on what is expected from you.

[bangkokburning]

<p>Weddings sre not an open invitation usually, but this might depend . O</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>the size of the village. There is always drama and issues between families as you migh think.&nbsp;</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>OK, so I am at 65k and it includes abt 12.5k in family transport as well. OuAdd to this...1.5k money envelopes for children, 2k for donation to a different wat near her fathers home. Rings total 15.5k and a gift we will give to her parents which I refuse to call son sot of 30k (she will pay 15k of it and she is allowed to use wedding gifts her side to cover what it can. 5k in addl costs for food, etc...during transit.&nbsp;</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>Note much of my costs will not be your costs -transit.</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>I don&#39;t think the costs low, just prudent. You can price everything at Big C. I have allowed b14k for food alone for 8 tables incl monks plus abt 25ppl night before. That is &nbsp;roughly 90. Add 15 for 105 meals. &nbsp;That is over b125 per meal cost. Women from the village will cook and food served up buffet style. That is plenty food for people I do not know (90%) or ever see again. None of my family will attend, friends outside Thailand or half dozen guys here I know.</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>I am not concerned wiyh Moms face, if my effort isn&#39;t enough, she can chip in with her gifted money (hah). &nbsp;They are good and loving people. They know their poor 36 yo daughter is m

Edited August 25, 2012 by bangkokburning

[prakhonchai nick]

If you have a village style wedding party, where virtually everyone is invited, I would recommend the following, though it will not be acceptable to anyone other than you

1) No food nor drink served until the wedding ceremony has finished (In practice, everyone eats and drinks upon arrival - even before the groom has made his way to the home. and 90% have buggered off before the happy couple emerge.)

2) Food and drink supplied to those guests who bother to attend the function - not to half the village inhabitants who just send someone along to collect bags of food and bottles of drink to take home.

[bangkokburning]

HEY

I need to put my estimate up. Now we are going to have musicians. I honestly thought it odd not to have a PA and some music, gf said it was fine. Mom wants it. Nice, I like Luk Thung alot, more than my gf. B3000 for 15 musicians I am told and amplification. They will also walk thru the village with me and her mother.

I also have to pay for an MC of sorts, someone to keep us on track and the wedding organized. I think it nonsense, but her mother is proving to be a real scatterbrain so maybe for MY sanity, it's worth it. B1250.

Her mother wants to have someone that can speak Pali to give a blessing. My hunch it will be not Pali but old style Khmer. Who knows. This will be over B1500 (they have to drive out and back to the wedding, only a very few of these people exist in Thailand any longer) and I might put my foot down at this point.

So there is more money...(fyi)

2nd Nick's advice.

[bangkokburning]

Sorry to go on and on about this but I want to give you a true idea of our (my) costs. OK the MC is both organizer and will provide a blessing in Pali. Evidently, he is used in many ceremonies - also when young men become monks. Also, he and not she. Also - He is has been accounted for in the budget prior so no addl money. Hope this helps.

[prakhonchai nick]

Surely a blessing in a language that everyone (or most) can understand would be preferable. Otherwise pure mumbo jumbo!!!

[Pormax]

Would definetely go with the village wedding, not only is it an experience far from what you are used too, but whether you care or not the wife and the wife's family will appreciate it. It will also get you known by the rest of the villagers, however though you do have a real name you will always be called Farang. Invitations are sent to the villagers and the envelopes that the invitations are in are returned with some money inside when they come to the wedding. Those who do not have an invitation are not expected to attend. However understand that one invitation could mean that four or more people (maybe plus children) of that family could turnup. I had a large 'House' party and we sent out 150 invitations, more than 400 turned up. If you are having music then you have to inform the local police who will give you permission to do so. I don't know about your village but security by the villge 'council' was required. We had 10 local men in brown uniforms and sticks, each were paid 200B. then the local police chief and his men arrived. This cost 5,000B to the top man and 200B per policeman. maybe this is not required for a wedding but worth checking on it. Yes it was a very large party with singers and dancers so there was always a chance of problems with the drunk youth of the village, so security was necessary.

I would say your estimate of 100,000b, given the information you have given, would be about right but always add about 10-15% for things you may not have considered. If you are not paying any Sin Sod that is very cheap.

The very best of luck for your wedding and the future, to you both.

[krisb]

My wife says for a wedding that goes day and night......

Monks 200b each

Food, 40,000b including the waiters and cook. (larb, tom, etc etc)

Drinks, 10 15 20 30k. Thats an open ended answer really. Personally, Thais I think are bad drinkers so not to much whiskey.

Tables and chairs can be supplied by the catering people cheap enough,

Total 100,000b would do it nicely.

Thats not including sin sot and all that jazz.

[krisb]

1 more thing, yes it would be showing some disrespect if you went to a resort and got married.

what would you think if your daughter didnt invite you to her wedding and then turned up at your place for the party??

Kow jai mai?

[bangkokburning]

OK, so we were wed. I had some addl expenses...

Some things that were not included were in fact covered by the money given to her mother for basically food. Other things were extra.

I have mentioned some of those in a prior post. Add'l costs which I encountered were friends/family cars driving in from Issarn, BKK and Sattahip. I was really happy to see her urban, contemporary friends whom I had met weeks before at a funeral. Her close friends couldnot make it unfortunately (work). All told that was about B8000.

Money to kids and single women holding the gate for me to cross into the yard/wedding and children: B1000

Money for her sis and bro that helped so much: 500/1000

I did not pay for this and would not if asked. Money for alcohol for the musician troupe that walked me through the village and played some songs thereafter. One case Leo bottles and one Blend, approx B600 at the local shop (?).

I am "happy" I did it for her but left to do over again, I would not do so unless I was already living in the village and had intentions of remaining there.

There are many reasons getting married at a hotel is not a great idea. But one thing you need to do is assert your equality and your 100% right to manage your money and your life. Do not have strangers deciding what they are going to be doing with your money.

[bangkokburning]

Sin Sod: Her money on the table that is returned to you (the couple) that day. If that can't happen, no ss.

You dont state how many people are in attendance. Note, if the vilage is cooking they will cook the same old crap they eat every day becasue that is what they know how to cook and what they know. Cooks: 200 for event and 150 for a half day. B150 for any server. We did not use servers, food came out of the "kitchen" and people took care on their own accord. Issarn people are resourceful.

I gave 500B to each monk, but I have some sentiment towards Buddhism and it was good face for her mother. Supporting the wat is one place I am hapy to spend money and even budgeted money donation for ice boxes and tables/chairs.

ED: We planned 8 monks but 10 showed. So I hope that is good karma. I did not pay more.

Remember, you will have people that will ned to eat the night before as well as the morning after.

My whole gig less rings, sinsod (show) came barely under <100k, perhaps a bit more do to the petrol money I had to cough up.

No one as elated over my cheapness, but I don't care honestly. It is not their money. I have a number of wealthy relatives who married at the registrar in US, was good enough for them. *Not that I am wealthy or trust fund baby or anything of sort!

I would urge you to micro-manage the entire affair yourself. It is super easy and you will have confidence it will go as smoothly as it can - for Issarn. Go up a few weeks before and get everything arranged in a day or two. The only thing mom should be in charge of and given money for is for food.

Edited September 7, 2012 by bangkokburning

[cooked]

Since the village boss lady found out that I had got married at the Amphur, I immediately got more respect in the village. So continuing in the same vein, I am sure that a village wedding is desirable.

I will be inflicting on the guests: absolute insistence on no amplified music for the first 24 hours, and after that if anyone wants ts to organise anything, up to them.

Traditional music and dancers from the local school, demo of Laotian sword dance. I can find an elephant or two...food cooked in the village, tables laid out for 200 people.

I have been a bit of a showman in the past and don't see why I should pay to have crappy music blasted into my ear holes against my will. ฿20 000 - ฿30 000 is our budget, we need to have a date fixed by a monk I believe.

A lady in the village did the whole thing, her 'husband' paid ฿67 000.- and is now back in Sweden, so that was a waste of money. The more you let other people organise things, the more you will be paying Farang prices.

[bangkokburning]

Surely a blessing in a language that everyone (or most) can understand would be preferable. Otherwise pure mumbo jumbo!!!

Preferable, yes -but not mumbo jumbo.

[expat63]

I have been in different weddings around Thailand with different sosial status among the couple.

In Pattaya one copule paid 12 000 bath pr table, alcohol not includet. This was a upperclass wedding.

A normal wedding in rural areas, I'll say 2500 bath pr table.

If you want to show the parents that you care about them, dont save to much. And spesial when you dont pay any sinsod.

I know most of the Thais going to a wedding expect that its served alcohol. You dont need to put the whiskey on the table, but they can ask for it.

1 table = 8 persons

[bangkokburning]

If you have a village style wedding party, where virtually everyone is invited, I would recommend the following, though it will not be acceptable to anyone other than you

1) No food nor drink served until the wedding ceremony has finished (In practice, everyone eats and drinks upon arrival - even before the groom has made his way to the home. and 90% have buggered off before the happy couple emerge.)

2) Food and drink supplied to those guests who bother to attend the function - not to half the village inhabitants who just send someone along to collect bags of food and bottles of drink to take home.

Yes, by all means. I was promised his but it did not happen. Mom (really bro in law) dropped the ball here. Mom bought alcohol (xtra) for th emusicians and bro let a few bottles (1-2) slip after the monks blessing but before ceremony. LOCK IT UP LITERALLY.

[meatboy]

after what i saw at a wedding party dont put bottle's of whisky on the tables or they will soon disappear some only turn up just to pinch what they can,cheaper to pay some waiters.

[bangkokburning]

Cooked: We are in total agreement esp on ..."The more you let other people organise things, the more you will be paying Farang prices."

Good luck with organizing all that drama; paying for it, transporting it, etc...

My experience with this has been much like herding stray cats to a river for a swim.

YES: THE PLAN was not to put the alcohol on tables. I was o busy I did not know how that actually turned out. We did have extra cups (plastic) for alcohol and beer even.

Edited September 7, 2012 by bangkokburning

[raro]

Sin sod: I was very reluctant to that idea and spent about two weeks of reading on this subject on thaivisa. I believe I understood the concept now and I was happy to pay the 200k.

In short, without thaivisa I would probably not be married.

From the sin sod, my father in law paid for the food and drinks. We had over 300 people and it was a great party. The rest of the money he kept. As others mentioned, the wedding couple gets white envelopes with money. That equaled probably the amount that daddy kept,so from an accounting point of view if I had paid for the party myself, no sin sod and no white envelopes, the overall amount I had to shell out would have probably been the same.

Note that there are regional differences to customs and traditions.

And do the party in the village! Those hotel receptions are not even half the fun!

sent from my Android phone

[xybadog]

Thanks for all the responses guys and all the helpful advice. I'm still stuck about the right amount of money to budget but that's my problem and you've all given me something to think about.

I think I'll budget ฿150k and advise exactly what I expect and do much of the planning my self. Not into the sinsot thing myself but I'll give, as many of you advise, the "pot" to the in-laws for them to pay for the food etc and let them keep the rest.

I'm planning on the end of next year, I think. The gf hasn't been to the UK yet, so I want her to to visit there first before we tie the knot.

We have a house already, two doors down from her parents so we have a venue.

Thanks again, I'll be taking bits of advice from each of the posts and hopefully coming up with a decent plan.

[bangkokburning]

The pot won't amount to squat. If you are going to spend 150k on the bash you better have a bit of cash for them!

Plan everything yourself - it is very easy. I wish I had not trusted my MIL becasue despite my wife being an organized person, her mother is not.

The trouble with handing over money and letting others handle it other than a planner is that half of it will disappear. In pocketing some, mismanagement and poor choices. So it is your money wasted.

No problem, happy day you say - but will you be happy when you have put down B150k for a big day and see a few bottles of Blend and some very basic Issarn food about the tables. Then - it is asked for you bits of money here and there.

Once the money is given - it is gone. MIL is not going to give any of it back because you were under budget :-)

I broke the money down into lots: MIL, wife and myslef. MIL was basically food and temple/monk donations, I was alcohol and restaurants in transit and wife about everything else.

Edited September 8, 2012 by bangkokburning

[CharlieH]

Easy to have a great time when someone else is just paying the bill..whay hey !!!!............honestly, waste of time and money.

It doesnt mean a dam_n thing and its just a pure case of showing off, which the locals love to do, look what I got and I am better or got more than you have.

Couple that with "I got a ferang" and that pretty much sums the whole affair up.

Sorry if that sounds negative, but its the facts as I have witnessed.

You are basically paying for the village to have a party on you and give people a reason to brag about there newly acquired walking ATM.

AND dont forget when you have built or bought a house you'll do it for them all over again.........crazy !

Edited September 10, 2012 by CharlieH