Trying to steer this back to what the OP wrote about ...

I must admit I have little or no desire to go all in for Thailand's sake.

It's a heck of an interesting country, great people and food and, given a little luck and leadership a bright future.

But 'all in' ... no.

The investments (share market) I've made here have been profitable. I've diversified out of the Australian Dollar while it is strong and hedged my risks and have a modest share portfolio here in the SET which pays a tidy dividend.

The emotional investment, first in the gf and later building connections with her family have been more then rewarding and repaid in kind. For us, it's a two way street.

While we are discussing housing, when I first met the future (potential) outlaws, they were of the considered opinion that I would be building them a new house ...

Why ... because another Farang they heard a story about did just that for his PIL.

So what the OP mentioned early on ... it's about managing expectations.

I'm not a poker player but I have been able to manage their expectations down, gained their respect.

Might consider building a small place here if suitable land can be found at the Family Farm ... that offer has already been made to us.

So, I suppose as I mentioned in my first post here ... it's an 'all in' relationship, not with Thailand, but with my partner.

David

Who is your broker and what stocks do you currently have in your portfolio?

I'm all in!

That would make a good avatar for you

Good Idea, cheers!

Had nothing to lose coming here anyways. No wife, crappy job, crappy life. I came over with some credit cards and a bit of savings. I've been bouncing around South East Asia for years now. Not going back to the West even if I have to live on water and sticky rice. So for me it couldn't get any worse. Only wished I would have had some more savings in the bank to make the transition easier(couldn't save much because my crappy job paid so little).

Nothing wrong with that Neeranam, for many people the best thing they did in their lives was move to Thailand and I applaud them for having the bottle to have a go. Part of the OP was to ask how you came to that decision.....was it a long term process in your case?

theblether, to answer your question - I was working offshore in the oil business back in 1989, after graduating, in Aberdeen and also living in Leith. I was earning a lot of money and living like a very unusual life. I'd travel places with credit cards in my pocket and end up sleeping in parks and hostels due to my alcohol and drug addiction. I was spiritually bankrupt and my best 'friends' were the junkies and alkies of Leith. I was pissing away half my life and spending the other half in the middle of the North Sea.

I got into meditation to try and solve a few problems and that took me to Bangkok. My reasons for coming were meditation and medication. After years of living in Bangkok, had a rock bottom and a 'realization' and quit the booze and drugs. I never really did much thinking about where I wanted to be for the rest of my life as everyone told me I'd be dead by the time I was 30. There really were only 3 options for me - 'locked up', 'covered up' or 'sober up'. Thailand is one of the best places in the world if you're into alcohol and drugs. It is also one of the best places to recover.

In a sense I was born again in 2000 in Bangkok and this was my home. I had by this time no assets in Scotland. As I started growing up emotionally, I met a wonderful girl who became my wife and mother of my kids. I found lots of true friends and have never thought of going back to Scotland since, apart from visits. Sometimes I get a little emotional when I hear 'flower of Scotland' before a rugby match or pictures of the mountains but I suppose I only remember the good things. Every time I've been back, I am happy when the plane arrives back in Bangkok.

Life here is truly wonderful and I have a life beyond my wildest dreams. From time to time, I forget how good things are here as they become commonplace. There were many years when the first thing I say in the morning was, "thank you God for me being in Thailand'. Often now, when my acceptance and gratitude fall by the wayside, I am that crazy 'farang' going to work honking at all the motorcycles to get out my way. I forget that I choose to live here and all the great things about Thailand and it's people.

Nothing wrong with that Neeranam, for many people the best thing they did in their lives was move to Thailand and I applaud them for having the bottle to have a go. Part of the OP was to ask how you came to that decision.....was it a long term process in your case?

theblether, to answer your question - I was working offshore in the oil business back in 1989, after graduating, in Aberdeen and also living in Leith. I was earning a lot of money and living like a very unusual life. I'd travel places with credit cards in my pocket and end up sleeping in parks and hostels due to my alcohol and drug addiction. I was spiritually bankrupt and my best 'friends' were the junkies and alkies of Leith. I was pissing away half my life and spending the other half in the middle of the North Sea.

I got into meditation to try and solve a few problems and that took me to Bangkok. My reasons for coming were meditation and medication. After years of living in Bangkok, had a rock bottom and a 'realization' and quit the booze and drugs. I never really did much thinking about where I wanted to be for the rest of my life as everyone told me I'd be dead by the time I was 30. There really were only 3 options for me - 'locked up', 'covered up' or 'sober up'. Thailand is one of the best places in the world if you're into alcohol and drugs. It is also one of the best places to recover.

In a sense I was born again in 2000 in Bangkok and this was my home. I had by this time no assets in Scotland. As I started growing up emotionally, I met a wonderful girl who became my wife and mother of my kids. I found lots of true friends and have never thought of going back to Scotland since, apart from visits. Sometimes I get a little emotional when I hear 'flower of Scotland' before a rugby match or pictures of the mountains but I suppose I only remember the good things. Every time I've been back, I am happy when the plane arrives back in Bangkok.

Life here is truly wonderful and I have a life beyond my wildest dreams. From time to time, I forget how good things are here as they become commonplace. There were many years when the first thing I say in the morning was, "thank you God for me being in Thailand'. Often now, when my acceptance and gratitude fall by the wayside, I am that crazy 'farang' going to work honking at all the motorcycles to get out my way. I forget that I choose to live here and all the great things about Thailand and it's people.

Excellent post

Neeranam...... Terrific post. makes me realise how lucky I have been in life.... very humbling. Thank you.

Neeranam...... Terrific post. makes me realise how lucky I have been in life.... very humbling. Thank you.

+1

Many roads lead to Thailand, thanks for that Neeranam.

In answer to the OP question, I can add that I would be 'all in' if Thailand allowed me to be 'all in'. Unfortunately, as far as Thai citizenship is concerned, owning several Thai businesses and paying business tax on them is not considered equal to paying personal income tax, which seems to be a crucial requirement for a citizenship application.

Simon

In answer to the OP question, I can add that I would be 'all in' if Thailand allowed me to be 'all in'. Unfortunately, as far as Thai citizenship is concerned, owning several Thai businesses and paying business tax on them is not considered equal to paying personal income tax, which seems to be a crucial requirement for a citizenship application.

Simon

On the surface, this seems crazy.... You have created businesses (presumably employing thai people) and in doing so have committed to the country and contributed to the economy far more than by earning a salary and paying personal tax. But, as we all know, T.i.T.

As for me, I will not even try to go all in, other than (maybe) the emotional investment in a "very good lady of my acquaintance". I've been out to Thailand several times in recent years, and have spent quite a while researching potential benefits and pitfalls. I have just retired in the UK, and have invested in a house here, that may well go into my kids' names: I have several people who are keen to rent it while I am away, so that will provide extra income for living / savings. My money will stay here and I will draw down from that as and when needed. No thoughts of buying a thai house in the lady's name, no intention to make major purchases in Thailand that I could not afford to abandon..... and fortunately, we are of an age at which further sprogs are not too likely.

Without all of those potential headaches, (and with others firmly in mind), I intend to make a move to Thailand in the coming months, and see how things go. If things are generally positive, then I will spend the majority of each year there, but if not, I have the house here, my grown-up kids and my grandchildren....................and I ain't going to throw out all my warm clothing!!!

Rather like David 48, my major investment will be the emotional one I make with my lady. Thailand as a country is secondary to that.

In answer to the OP question, I can add that I would be 'all in' if Thailand allowed me to be 'all in'. Unfortunately, as far as Thai citizenship is concerned, owning several Thai businesses and paying business tax on them is not considered equal to paying personal income tax, which seems to be a crucial requirement for a citizenship application.

Simon

Can't you pay yourself a salary and file tax returns on that?

Edited January 10, 201313 yr by Trembly

Sprogs.....have not heard that name for so long....always reminded me of throwing up for some reason.

Sprogs.....have not heard that name for so long....always reminded me of throwing up for some reason.

'Passion Pop' ...

.

So do you have the legal authority to decide where your children live and what school they go to? You still have not answered my question.

You must have missed it.

So if you have no legal standing with regards to the location of your children or their education I would have to assume you are not going all in. I can't see a man not doing that. Seems to me that the kids determine if you are all in or not. Just my opinion. If I did right or wrong I did it as my children's legal father.

But you laughed at the thought of a man here making decisive decisions for his children and making them happen if he believes it to be the best possible scenario for him....why did you laugh ?

My grandfather used to talk to the TV in Gaelic during sporting events. TV was new when I was a kid. I loved my grandfather but it was funny. It had about the same amount of practical value as a man talking about where his girlfriend's children live or where they go to school. If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

What's great about life is that most time you have choices ... different forks in the road that you can take.

My guess is that your road is different to mine and the OP's ... maybe by short distance or the proverbial country mile.

Probably our millage varies also ...

.

If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

What's great about life is that most time you have choices ... different forks in the road that you can take.

My guess is that your road is different to mine and the OP's ... maybe by short distance or the proverbial country mile.

Probably our millage varies also ...

Which is more difficult; telling a 13 year old daughter she can't have a $500 Chanel cocktail dress or going to war?

Going to War........but being a good parent is one of the biggest challenges in life.

Just to stray back on topic.....I've gone "all in" as per theblether's definition.

I spent 33 years in the Maritime Industry with high qualifications and a good job. The thing that started me to think differently about life in general, was that a few good mates started falling off the perch, so to speak, with no serious health issues at all. Some others who were quite fit and healthy, suddenly had cancer.

Once I started coming to Thailand, I was happy to work in Oz and party in LOS during my time off work, life was good to me.....so I thought. But deep down inside I felt lonely. I wasn't purposefully looking for a relationship, especially after my divorce, but something else was missing in my life.

By sheer chance I met this Thai lady, and the chemistry was just right. I tried to ignore it but it wouldn't go away.

So to cut a long story short, we married in Oz and lived there for 7 years, but kept coming to LOS for holidays. I would see her sisters and other family who worked hard on the farms and had very little material possessions (compared to myself) yet seemed so much more happier than me. Later we built a house, which we are in now, and had intentions to spend half time in Oz and half in LOS.

But as my job dragged on, working long and irregular hours, the "fun" disappeared from the job...plus I was paying a huge mortgage for the unit we were living in.

Then one time we were on holiday here in LOS, I had a good talking to myself and asked myself some serious questions wrt......could I really live here and be happy? Knowing it would be the biggest decision of my life....I weighed up the pro's and con's, and basing my decision on quality of life as opposed to quantity of money...I jumped in "Boots n All" and am very happy, with no desire to return to Oz to live, but maybe for a holiday.

I know a lot of members have been more concerned about investments and money as such.....I used to as well, but now I concentrate on just being happy and being able to live on meagre means. I know lots of money gives you more choices, but to echo another member I am fond of by the initials JC, it doesn't matter where you live, just so long as you are alive and live your life like you mean it.

Cheers.

Thanks for that Rsquared..........we're getting some outstanding posts on this topic. Thanks very much.

Sprogs.....have not heard that name for so long....always reminded me of throwing up for some reason.

haha.... Nooo...It was other peoples' sprogs that gave me the boak. However, as of this week, the herds of the Great Unwashed are finally behind me.

Sprogs.....have not heard that name for so long....always reminded me of throwing up for some reason.

haha.... Nooo...It was other peoples' sprogs that gave me the boak. However, as of this week, the herds of the Great Unwashed are finally behind me.

Translation.....

Rob used to be a school teacher......he retired this week. I think he's quite happy about that

Sprogs.....have not heard that name for so long....always reminded me of throwing up for some reason.

haha.... Nooo...It was other peoples' sprogs that gave me the boak. However, as of this week, the herds of the Great Unwashed are finally behind me.

Translation.....

Rob used to be a school teacher......he retired this week. I think he's quite happy about that

Thx theblether....so many people divided by a common language...

Can't help wondering if Humbugged wasn't confusing sprogs with sprouts, though they can look much the same, with similar IQs......

Yes, retired from teaching... a strange feeling, but now diabolically busy trying to catch up on all the things I've been trying to do but work used to get in the way. Investing a bit of time here so that I can invest time in making a go of things in LOS ...... says he, trying to move seamlessly back on-topic.

Can't you pay yourself a salary and file tax returns on that?

Nope - I applied on 2 occasions to get a Work Permit as Manager of my own business. The WP was refused on both occasions by Phuket Labour Office

Anyway - this is getting off-topic

Simon

Can't you pay yourself a salary and file tax returns on that?

Nope - I applied on 2 occasions to get a Work Permit as Manager of my own business. The WP was refused on both occasions by Phuket Labour Office

Anyway - this is getting off-topic

Simon

I can think of some way to get over that - do you have a thread about it anywhere else? I don't like going off-topic.

I was working in temporary jobs for BT in Bristol,saving up in the summer months and travelling in Asia in the winter. After 4 winters spent in Thailand, I remember looking out of the window at Don Meuang,thinking I don't want to be going back anymore, in my heart I just felt I belonged in Thailand, especially Issan.

So I came back, got a degree at Ramkhamhaeng which got me a teacher's licence and met a woman with 3 sweet daughters. Built a house in her village and one on the farm and expanded the farm.

Luckily she's got some great siblings and one of the daughters has married a great guy, can fix everything, doesn't drink or smoke.Now we have the internet on the farm, sometimes faster than Bangkok.

Upcountry you can have all the benefits of modern life without the hassles.

It's been a wonderful 25 years so far, to think I could have spent my life, working 9-5 for BT, renting a DVD at the weekend with 2 weeks in Spain once a year! The utter boredom would have killed me. .

I was working in temporary jobs for BT in Bristol,saving up in the summer months and travelling in Asia in the winter. After 4 winters spent in Thailand, I remember looking out of the window at Don Meuang,thinking I don't want to be going back anymore, in my heart I just felt I belonged in Thailand, especially Issan.

So I came back, got a degree at Ramkhamhaeng which got me a teacher's licence and met a woman with 3 sweet daughters. Built a house in her village and one on the farm and expanded the farm.

Luckily she's got some great siblings and one of the daughters has married a great guy, can fix everything, doesn't drink or smoke.Now we have the internet on the farm, sometimes faster than Bangkok.

Upcountry you can have all the benefits of modern life without the hassles.

It's been a wonderful 25 years so far, to think I could have spent my life, working 9-5 for BT, renting a DVD at the weekend with 2 weeks in Spain once a year! The utter boredom would have killed me. .

Lovely story Bannork

My most used phrase when people ask me if I'm going to do something is 'maybe'.

When I went back to England many moons ago with shiny new Thai wife in tow, I was committed to returning to Thailand to live.

Now I am living in Thailand and have been for 2 years.

If there is one thing (actually there are a few) life has taught me, it's that life has a habit of taking you places you would never have predicted. If I look at my life so far, in say 5 year blocks, my hopes and dreams of what I would be doing in five years time, is mostly not what happened. That is not to say it has been negative, many aspects of my life have been good, just not what I expected.

With this in mind I like to prepare for the unexpected (can you prepare for the unexpected?), so the first thing I did in the UK was set about getting Mrs mjj a British passport, all the time believing I would be returning to Thailand to live permanently.

Now in Thailand, some of the shine has been tarnished and I'm pondering leaving, probably not back to the UK, but leaving Thailand all the same. This I would have never thought five years ago, but I can feel secure that due to the lovely British passport I can take my family with me.

What I am getting at is that at my wisened old age of 3?, I try to always have a back up plan, if for whatever reason it goes t1ts up, or better opportunities arise.

Those 0.5% chances always have a habit of becoming much, much greater over time and I guess in 5 years time I will be doing something else I cant predict now.

You must have missed it.

So if you have no legal standing with regards to the location of your children or their education I would have to assume you are not going all in. I can't see a man not doing that. Seems to me that the kids determine if you are all in or not. Just my opinion. If I did right or wrong I did it as my children's legal father.

But you laughed at the thought of a man here making decisive decisions for his children and making them happen if he believes it to be the best possible scenario for him....why did you laugh ?

My grandfather used to talk to the TV in Gaelic during sporting events. TV was new when I was a kid. I loved my grandfather but it was funny. It had about the same amount of practical value as a man talking about where his girlfriend's children live or where they go to school. If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

There you go again...assuming a father, not married, has no say in where what his child does....this may be your experience, but as mentioned before, the gonads seem to not have the force with you.

Without people that cow tail to the whims of lesser mortals, s&m masters would have no clients.

Edited January 11, 201313 yr by Humbugged

So if you have no legal standing with regards to the location of your children or their education I would have to assume you are not going all in. I can't see a man not doing that. Seems to me that the kids determine if you are all in or not. Just my opinion. If I did right or wrong I did it as my children's legal father.

But you laughed at the thought of a man here making decisive decisions for his children and making them happen if he believes it to be the best possible scenario for him....why did you laugh ?

My grandfather used to talk to the TV in Gaelic during sporting events. TV was new when I was a kid. I loved my grandfather but it was funny. It had about the same amount of practical value as a man talking about where his girlfriend's children live or where they go to school. If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

There you go again...assuming a father, not married, has no say in where what his child does....this may be your experience, but as mentioned before, the gonads seem to not have the force with you.

Without people that cow tail to the whims of lesser mortals, s&m masters would have no clients.

I am talking about legal rights. You have none. It is not my experience it is the law. Has nothing to do with gonads. Bluster all you like. Lawyers and cops have a field day with people like you.

But you laughed at the thought of a man here making decisive decisions for his children and making them happen if he believes it to be the best possible scenario for him....why did you laugh ?

My grandfather used to talk to the TV in Gaelic during sporting events. TV was new when I was a kid. I loved my grandfather but it was funny. It had about the same amount of practical value as a man talking about where his girlfriend's children live or where they go to school. If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

There you go again...assuming a father, not married, has no say in where what his child does....this may be your experience, but as mentioned before, the gonads seem to not have the force with you.

Without people that cow tail to the whims of lesser mortals, s&m masters would have no clients.

I am talking about legal rights. You have none. It is not my experience it is the law. Has nothing to do with gonads. Bluster all you like. Lawyers and cops have a field day with people like you.

You are quite funny kerry in your own naive way.

My gonads are bigger than yours....obviously.

My grandfather used to talk to the TV in Gaelic during sporting events. TV was new when I was a kid. I loved my grandfather but it was funny. It had about the same amount of practical value as a man talking about where his girlfriend's children live or where they go to school. If you want some say in a child's life get married and suffer like the rest of us did. What do you think it is easy, cheap and painless?

There you go again...assuming a father, not married, has no say in where what his child does....this may be your experience, but as mentioned before, the gonads seem to not have the force with you.

Without people that cow tail to the whims of lesser mortals, s&m masters would have no clients.

I am talking about legal rights. You have none. It is not my experience it is the law. Has nothing to do with gonads. Bluster all you like. Lawyers and cops have a field day with people like you.

You are quite funny kerry in your own naive way.

My gonads are bigger than yours....obviously.

Your children's future is 100% in the hands of a Thai woman who you are not married to. Everyone who can read knows that. I have never felt confident giving another person so much of a legal advantage over me. I married two women to take care of my children. I married them for the children and not for myself. I sleep very well at night. If I had not done everything I could have done to safeguard my children I would not sleep well at night. Just me. That's the way I am.