Humour in my speech......is it possible?

[eyecatcher]

Looking for advice and suggestions here guys.

I am apparently taking part in an Issan traditional wedding next week. The girlfriend tells me I am the groom!

And that’s where Thai humour ends or is it?

It occurred to me that I may be called upon to make a speech; highly unlikely I think; but as a Brit with a strong sense of humour it would be quite fun to offer the wise cracks and see them completely fall flat.

In all fairness if I delivered a typical Brit grooms speech even to our American cousins’ I think a lot would be lost just on language and colloquialisms.

So after coming up with a suitable opening line…something like “Its great to see so many friends and family and people I don’t know; and I can honestly say it would not have been the same without you………..just an awful lot cheaper.”

“I’ve started, I’ve started, now we’re going; a bit of blue for the dads”

Its going to be hard enough to get my interpreter to convey the formal aspects of thanking everyone but what makes Thais laugh?

Sarcasm is insulting and black humour is just that.

My own thoughts is basically to dress up as a clown. They seem to like slapstick visual, and childlike tv shows, and my g/f likes me doing imitations of different accents.

So its not an educated humour is it?

Any suggestions on how to bring some chuckles.other than bring my own canned laughter.

[mistephenso]

Are you sure you've got this right??

If you are the "groom", you are getting married - if your girlfriend had to tell you that, then you have a WHOLE heap of problems other than being funny in a speech!?

[theblether]

Deliver a regular respectful speech and intersperse it with humorous dancing.Think Mr Bean not Oscar Wylde. All the old aunties will think you are a superstar.

[GuestHouse]

Thai wedding + speech.

It doesn't matter what you say, the guests won't be listening.

They've be staying just long enough to eat their fill, get a photo taken and sneak a couple of bottles of the hard stuff off the table (not necessarily their table) into their bag before sloping off with neither a bye nor wave.

[Morakot]

Congratulations!

Most speeches (by the groom or bride) are primarily thanking the parents (or each other). Usually not on the funny side; sometimes quite emotional.

The funny part can be the "interviews" about your background by the MC, if you'll have this during your "reception". This would be the best place to put some light-hearted jokes in. But make sure they are not lost in translation.

[chickenslegs]

If you are going to tell jokes you will need to hire a musician to play the drum roll, cymbals and boiiiiing at every punchline, otherwise nobody will know when to laugh.

[GirlDrinkDrunk]

really, you either know the family, or you dont. why not spare yourseld (and the "interpreter"), do a big round of wais and move on.

the first reply i typed was going to make was that the thread was not worthy of comment, but that was a paradox

Edited September 19, 2013 by GirlDrinkDrunk

[jbrain]

You can say whatever you want, nobody gonna understand a word of it anyway. Even if you speak perfect Thai there is little chance they will understand you in Isaan.

if you want to be funny, get to wear some woman clothes and get someone who allows you to slap on his head all the time. They will adore you.

[GirlDrinkDrunk]

You can say whatever you want, nobody gonna understand a word of it anyway. Even if you speak perfect Thai there is little chance they will understand you in Isaan.

if you want to be funny, get to wear some woman clothes and get someone who allows you to slap on his head all the time. They will adore you.

read before commenting mate: keyword (sarcastic hashtag) #interpreter

[jbrain]

You can say whatever you want, nobody gonna understand a word of it anyway. Even if you speak perfect Thai there is little chance they will understand you in Isaan.

if you want to be funny, get to wear some woman clothes and get someone who allows you to slap on his head all the time. They will adore you.

read before commenting mate: keyword (sarcastic hashtag) #interpreter

So you mean he gonna have a high paid qualified interpreter from one of those translation offices /

Otherwise everything in my post is valid.

[I Like Thai]

My own thoughts is basically to dress up as a clown.

If you do this, you will remove all doubts they may have had about you.

[eyecatcher]

Are you sure you've got this right??

 

If you are the "groom", you are getting married - if your girlfriend had to tell you that, then you have a WHOLE heap of problems other than being funny in a speech!?

...oh my...case in point ..American are you?

A brit would have seen the humour in 3 seconds

Sent via tin can and string after pigeon shot

[harrry]

Congratulations...and good luck.

If this is the worst of your problems you have no worries.....NOW.

[eyecatcher]

Deliver a regular respectful speech and intersperse it with humorous dancing.Think Mr Bean not Oscar Wylde.  All the old aunties will think you are a superstar.

Mr bean it is then, girly says I look like bean most of the time.

Hard stuff I am not worrying,I have the trump card,and said buddist ceremony,so no booze for the gatecrashers at my expense.

My thai mate will translate for me,,,he is fluent in english as is the gf..but I agree a speech is probably unnecessary and will fall on deaf ears.

Just a few days to hone a bean sketch then..

Sent via tin can and string after pigeon shot

[Gsxrnz]

Mate, forget about any speech as that's the least of your worries - you could read out the latest Premier League scores and it would be as interesting to them as anything else you could say.

The real problem is that you WILL be forced to sing a song - declining is not an option. 99% chance they won't have the song you want on the karaoke machine.

So unless you're a talented singer that can wing it, I suggest you find a song you can at least hum to (with the words) online and have it on a stick or a CD. Organise it with the band in advance of the event so they have it on their computer. Oh....make sure the song has LOADS of base, or it won't go down too well.

And don't do what a mate of mine did - secretly learned a Thai (actually Isaan) song and thought he'd surprise everybody. Not only did he murder the song but mispronunciations changed quite a few meanings of the words. Teerak was fuming!

Don't forget to dance like nobody's watching (read "Epileptic Monkey") - they'll love that.

Edited September 20, 2013 by Gsxrnz

[Ianatlarge]

If marriage is involved, the subject is innately humorous. My suggestion, speak well of Thailand, and your new village and family (the same? haha). For humour, crack jokes about farang and the UK (the last is easy). Self deprecatory humour goes donw well.

[geronimo]

Not saying that this is happening to you, but in a small village in a suburb of Bangkok where I live there is a family with three daughters. All the girls are internet savvy and they search for western men. Last year there were three "weddings". This involves hiring a tent, providing the food and drink etc. the "groom" will be expected to pay something, even a dowry perhaps (sin sot) and then when he leaves Thailand and go back to work, he will be expected to send money on a regular basis. In the past 3 years there has been nine of these so called weddings. They are not legally married in the eyes of the law, that must be done in the local amphur office. So this family has a massive income and I guess the guys will come over (at different times) and think that the long term plans they have made are on track etc etc.

They have asked me to attend on several occasions but I wouldn't be able to stop myself from warning the guy off so I stay away. As I said at the beginning of the post, I am not implying this is happening to you, just relaying an experience that is currently playing out.

[Beetlejuice]

Deliver a regular respectful speech and intersperse it with humorous dancing.Think Mr Bean not Oscar Wylde. All the old aunties will think you are a superstar.

Mr bean it is then, girly says I look like bean most of the time.

Hard stuff I am not worrying,I have the trump card,and said buddist ceremony,so no booze for the gatecrashers at my expense.

My thai mate will translate for me,,,he is fluent in english as is the gf..but I agree a speech is probably unnecessary and will fall on deaf ears.

Just a few days to hone a bean sketch then..

Sent via tin can and string after pigeon shot

Your friend maybe fluent in English, but would he understand the English sense of humour and be able to convey the message across in a funny way?

I`m half English and half American. None of the Thais undrstand my sense of humour. At times has backed fired on me, especially when our joking has double meanings and they have taken my joking humour as personal.

Try joking with a Thai by calling him a four eyed git, a short arse, baldy, or a knock kneed knackered old fool. In order to take the p-ss out of people, they have to be your mates, and in Thailand this just doesn`t work.

If you are getting married, you have my congratulations.

[johnlandy]

Any attempts at humour will (for the locals) go down like a concrete parachute.

Some do have a sense of humour but for 90% plus it will not be understood.

They just won't get it.

They might laugh when they see a clip of Mr Bean but if you ask them why they cannot tell you. They just laugh at his antics 'not what he is uttering'

And as for the yanks they cannot even understand the "Two Ronnies or Benny Hill"

[Sydebolle]

Well, mate, look at the following picture for clarification. If you are the groom then this might be your last funny speech until you're divorced again 8-)

Edited September 20, 2013 by Sydebolle

[eyecatcher]

I advised the girly today, that as part of "western" tradition the groom would normally make a speech..

The look on her face was a picture....."concrete parachute" indeed.

But she said ok, if we can find a suitable time in the proceedings. I suggested maybe after the food and just at the beginning of the evening when we can toast the bride, the bridesmaids, the mother of the bride, the villagers, and Thailand.

there it was again......that "concrete parachute"

she said, actually if someone likes what you are saying they will just clap.

i really do need to download some applause.

Thanks for the ideas guys, will report back on the outcome

[cmsally]

Tricky one with language and humour not to mention the cultural thing.

Most Thai wedding speeches are just formal thank yous to relations , any VIPs etc.

If you want to interject some humour , prepare a few sentences in Isan dialect, that should crack them up, just 2 or 3 sentences should do.

[mistephenso]

Are you sure you've got this right??

If you are the "groom", you are getting married - if your girlfriend had to tell you that, then you have a WHOLE heap of problems other than being funny in a speech!?

...oh my...case in point ..American are you?

A brit would have seen the humour in 3 seconds

Sent via tin can and string after pigeon shot

Haha - no, I'm English too...!

But now I see why you are asking for advice on being funny. I was joking too my friend...

On a slightly more serious note, I have given a 'best man' and groom speech here in Thailand to a mixed (Thai and Farang) audience bi-lingually. If you can speak Thai fairly fluently, then you can probably get away with telling a few jokes. If you can't, then I would forget it completely!

Some of the jokes in my best man speech didn't come across as I wanted them to in Thai, but I did get a few laughs. Who knows though, maybe they were laughing 'at' me and not with me?! Not that I care now it's done, but anyway...

Just get up and thank your wife-to-be's parents for having such a beautiful daughter and tell everyone how much you love her - they'll enjoy that and, more importantly, so will your other half.

Good luck anyway!

[Mudcrab]

I advised the girly today, that as part of "western" tradition the groom would normally make a speech..

The look on her face was a picture....."concrete parachute" indeed.

But she said ok, if we can find a suitable time in the proceedings. I suggested maybe after the food and just at the beginning of the evening when we can toast the bride, the bridesmaids, the mother of the bride, the villagers, and Thailand.

there it was again......that "concrete parachute"

she said, actually if someone likes what you are saying they will just clap.

i really do need to download some applause.

Thanks for the ideas guys, will report back on the outcome

Good Luck and all the best!!

[krisb]

Ok firstly, congratulations!

2nd, it's your wedding, I've been to Issan weddings btw and if you want to make a speech, then go for it I say!

The village weddings I've been to the groom's have a look of almost fear in their eyes on the big day. It involves a knock on our doorstop to get ready at 6am, then I relax them by pouring whiskey into them at 6.30am. Then they usually stare at me like am I really meant to carry this tree branch? Yes you big Norwegian <deleted> I said to him. But Krisb why? Fcuked if I know, I'm not Thai said me. Why are they laughing at me then Krisb? Cause your flies undone you big stud you. I'm a bit drunk thanks to you Krisb. I know, but trust me there's 9 monks at your place about to chant for an hour, you need to be.

[CharlieH]

Better to be thought an idiot than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

If you had to be told you were the groom, you have bigger problems than a speech.

Edited September 20, 2013 by CharlieH

[bra]

Congratulations and I hope you and your wife have a good future. My 30 years of living and working in Asia have shown me that any attempt at humour by a foreigner has fallen completely flat - a better outcome than being unintentionally insulting which has occurred often. But give it a go if you are brave enough and learn some Isaan words not Thai and keep smiling. Wait until they have all had enough to drink - works the same for weddings back at a western culture home.

[dao16]

Well, if you can say a few things in Thai (better yet, in Issaan) people will crack up anyway. Most of them will be laughing with you, not at you. Deep irony will go over most people's heads, honestly, unless your Thai family is used to your sense of humor. The Issaan weddings I have been to have never had speeches by the groom, just from important guys, family members, etc. That is no reason not to give a speech if you want to, though.

Just remember that you being a generally fun guy with maybe a word or two in the local lingo will classify you as hilarious in the village/town...not as difficult as you might think. Many of us regularly make people laugh by saying "bo" ("mai" in Thai language). Shortest punchline/joke in the world. They love it.

Good luck and congrats.

[smotherb]

Just tell them you love your bride so much that you are willing to give her family just as much money as her family will give you.

[krisb]

Just tell them you love your bride so much that you are willing to give her family just as much money as her family will give you.

That's a great start to entering a family.