Worried

[jocko]

My wife has offered a bed for a couple of months to a gay friend of hers now in itself I have no problem with this as I have known him for years and he is OK.

Last year he went from a strong fit guy to a bag of bones couldn't eat tired all the time now he looks a lot better and attends the local hospital and takes tablets etc but on his neck he has lots of sores which are hidden with band aids now they don't seem to be healing and he keeps them clean and has stuff from the hospital.

In the house we have wife's daughter husband and two young children

Wife knows something wrong but being Thai won't ask.

Should she be worried as when he started to get poorly my first thought was HIV.

[nonthaburial]

Yes I think you should be worried, even if it is not HIV, you don't need your house or it's occupants being put I to a health risk situation. Kudos to you wife for being so kind hearted and wishing to help, but less tunnel vision is needed, in my humble opinion.

[aliep]

Don't walk down the street without ringing a bell, and shouting "unclean... unclean..."

Get real, there is no danger from HIV. I am astounded by ignorance in 2014!

[Suradit69]

Should she be worried as when he started to get poorly my first thought was HIV.

And if he weren't gay that wouldn't have crossed your mind?

I agree with Nonthaburial that having someone that sick in your home in contact with all your family members gives rise to some legitimate concerns. Assuming he speaks fluent English (I'm also assuming he is Thai??) you need to have a heart-to-heart with him about the nature of his illness and make it clear you are concerned both about him as well as your children.

I'm all for practicing local customs regarding being polite, but Thai people also understand the importance of looking after children. Whether or not he has HIV or something else, putting the children at risk is not a reasonable thing to do even if you do ruffle some feathers.

[EvilDrSomkid]

Should she be worried as when he started to get poorly my first thought was HIV.

And if he weren't gay that wouldn't have crossed your mind?

I agree with Nonthaburial that having someone that sick in your home in contact with all your family members gives rise to some legitimate concerns. Assuming he speaks fluent English (I'm also assuming he is Thai??) you need to have a heart-to-heart with him about the nature of his illness and make it clear you are concerned both about him as well as your children.

I'm all for practicing local customs regarding being polite, but Thai people also understand the importance of looking after children. Whether or not he has HIV or something else, putting the children at risk is not a reasonable thing to do even if you do ruffle some feathers.

All the symptoms that OP has described sound like AIDS to me. Full blown. Although it is difficult to be infected unless there is exchange of blood or semen, it is a risk. Accidents happen. A discrete moment of honesty would not be amiss. Very kind to offer him a place to stay.

Or is he about to die?

[lucifer666]

Your wife is Thai but won't ask ??. Here in my neck of the woods (Hua Hin), a band aid on my finger would illicit a thousand questions from the locals, How, When, Does it hurt ETC lol

[Sheryl]

It does sound suspicious for HIV that progressed to AIDs and is perhaps now starrting to come under control with meds.

The good news for you is that it is not transmittable through casual contact nor does the virus live any length of time outside the body. You and your family should avoid direct contact with his blood and with any discharges from open sores but that is not a likely scenario in any event.

[Sheryl]

To contact HIV you not only need contact with an infected person's fresh bodily fluids but these in turn have to have access into your blood. Semen infects people through small abrasions in the vagina or rectum which allows the virus to pass into the blood.

I can't envision a scenario in which semen on bedsheets being handled by others would lead to infection. Nor has anything of that sort ever been reported.

[Morakot]

The level of ignorance here is astonishing.

[pauleddy]

Idiotic and homophobic reply from jomcondo.

In the world, more straight people have HIV than gay people. The virus can only live outside of the body for 8-20 seconds (depends which book you read).

Going through the process of being ill with AIDS is actually very scary and debilitating. Actually, AIDs and HIV are not the same thing.

The guy will get better and stronger with the meds. The sores, which may well be KS, will heal up within 2-12 months. Once his CD4 count rises, the body gets better--and even if he does have the HIV virus, it will maybe become undetectable (which also means that his body fluids carry virtually a minimum risk).

People who take the combination therapy (i.e. the meds) can now have a normal life, and live to 70 or 80 like everybody else.

Nasty comments are very ignorant and reflect a 1980s mentality of prejudice and lack of knowledge.

Around 6-10% of the population is gay or bisexual. In a world of 7 billion people, that means that 500 to 700 million people are gay or bi. Enough people to make 10-14 Thailands or Britains. Enough to make 2 USAs.

Eddy

[sirchai]

just make sure you don't come into contact with the sheets too soon after he has been masturbating.

You sick freak.. I had lost many friends through HIV/AIDS. One of my family members is fighting the war within this system and the loss of face being more important than the loss of life.

And you dare to make jokes about an obviously very sick guy.Shame on you as a human being in the 21st century. You'd FAILED.

To the OP:

All symptoms seem to be caused by the HIV virus. A woman in my wife's village didn't even wash her own daughter, when she couldn't move anymore.

Another woman was being brought to the village to die. It's a stigma in Thailand and many people never tell their relatives when they hear that they're positive.

Try to be careful, as all body fluid can be infectious.I'd never gotten a real answer from doctors, if for example mosquitoes can transmit it to others.

A tiny drop of blood on his tooth brush can be dangerous for anybody, let's say having a little cut, or somebody using said brush....

The virus can survive for hours outside the body.( depending on the circumstances) You'll have to be very careful with all you're doing for him. Most important is to get the right medication.

Hospitals in Thailand usually only make a CD 4 count and once it's under 250, they start to give Retroviral drugs. Pretty new is that starting from this year, they also have to make a virus load test, per ml of blood. Only both results enable medical personal to give the right medication.

Sad is that those "medical personal" is mostly not really qualified to treat people the right way.

Seems that people had learned through the biggest mistake in history to give AZT in a high dosage to AIDS patients, which killed them all. Those who'd received placebos survived much longer.A good friend of mine, a good doctor, was one of the guys who made this "study" to see how AZT worked.

It worked well and finally killed all patients.

People here usually test CD 4's every six month. If you can do something, tell them to go for a virus load test as well. It's a law now, but often not understood here.A virus load test should be done annually.

Once you've got the guy on the right medication, he'll be able to go back to work, or whatever he does.

Should the CD 4's be under 200, it usually turns into AIDS and the patients die because of a TBC, lungs infections, or anything else, without medication. Once a patient is just in bed, not moving anymore, it's very difficult for all involved.

Many patients of TBC have to take their medication for six months, but many stop taking them, once they feel better. A huge mistake.

TBC is pretty common under HIV patients in Thailand and you should be very careful, as the open type is highly infectious, as well. A little cough and you'll get it, too.

Please don';t get disillusioned, as so many Thais are trying to act like they don't want to have contact with you, when you're helping somebody.

See it as it is. A disease we all can get. Don't give up. You'll never walk alone.

Edited February 20, 2014 by sirchai

[pauleddy]

HIV does not survive long outside the human body (such as on surfaces), and it cannot reproduce. It is not spread by

• Air or water.
• Insects, including mosquitoes or ticks.
• Saliva, tears, or sweat. There is no documented case of HIV being transmitted by spitting.
• Casual contact like shaking hands or sharing dishes.
• Closed-mouth or “social” kissing
• Toilet seats. (www.cdc.gov)

[stickylies]

so a sick guy with sores has aids... common guys, it could be the case but there are plenty of other diseases that cause loss of weight and shit... (even depression does, ...).

YOU ask the guy what he has, period.

cut the crap/face-crap.

[stickylies]

if mosquitoes can transmit it to others.

NO THEY CANNOT, not even when they are gay mosquitos...

[lostinsurin]

HIV does not survive long outside the human body (such as on surfaces), and it cannot reproduce. It is not spread by

• Air or water.
• Insects, including mosquitoes or ticks.
• Saliva, tears, or sweat. There is no documented case of HIV being transmitted by spitting.
• Casual contact like shaking hands or sharing dishes.
• Closed-mouth or “social” kissing
• Toilet seats. (www.cdc.gov)

That's amazing, where did you get this info?

DH

[jocko]

I didn't want to cause a stir and please be rest assured that I am not anti gay by any stretch of the imagination I like the guy and when he first got sick I offered to go with him to the hospital and get checked I would take care the bill he didn't want to through fear I think but I kept on to him to no avail

There was no assumption from me about being gay and

HIV go hand in hand .Arthur Ashe the great American tennis player died whilst trying to teach the world.

If he didn't have the sores on his neck I wouldn't be the least bit concerned but because they are weeping it worried me

Thanks for all helpful replies I just needed a bit of help

Edited February 20, 2014 by jocko

[lostinsurin]

just make sure you don't come into contact with the sheets too soon after he has been masturbating.

You sick freak.. I had lost many friends through HIV/AIDS. One of my family members is fighting the war within this system and the loss of face being more important than the loss of life.

And you dare to make jokes about an obviously very sick guy.Shame on you as a human being in the 21st century. You'd FAILED.

To the OP:

All symptoms seem to be caused by the HIV virus. A woman in my wife's village didn't even wash her own daughter, when she couldn't move anymore.

Another woman was being brought to the village to die. It's a stigma in Thailand and many people never tell their relatives when they hear that they're positive.

Try to be careful, as all body fluid can be infectious.I'd never gotten a real answer from doctors, if for example mosquitoes can transmit it to others.

A tiny drop of blood on his tooth brush can be dangerous for anybody, let's say having a little cut, or somebody using said brush....

The virus can survive for hours outside the body.( depending on the circumstances) You'll have to be very careful with all you're doing for him. Most important is to get the right medication.

Hospitals in Thailand usually only make a CD 4 count and once it's under 250, they start to give Retroviral drugs. Pretty new is that starting from this year, they also have to make a virus load test, per ml of blood. Only both results enable medical personal to give the right medication.

Sad is that those "medical personal" is mostly not really qualified to treat people the right way.

Seems that people had learned through the biggest mistake in history to give AZT in a high dosage to AIDS patients, which killed them all. Those who'd received placebos survived much longer.A good friend of mine, a good doctor, was one of the guys who made this "study" to see how AZT worked.

It worked well and finally killed all patients.

People here usually test CD 4's every six month. If you can do something, tell them to go for a virus load test as well. It's a law now, but often not understood here.A virus load test should be done annually.

Once you've got the guy on the right medication, he'll be able to go back to work, or whatever he does.

Should the CD 4's be under 200, it usually turns into AIDS and the patients die because of a TBC, lungs infections, or anything else, without medication. Once a patient is just in bed, not moving anymore, it's very difficult for all involved.

Many patients of TBC have to take their medication for six months, but many stop taking them, once they feel better. A huge mistake.

TBC is pretty common under HIV patients in Thailand and you should be very careful, as the open type is highly infectious, as well. A little cough and you'll get it, too.

Please don';t get disillusioned, as so many Thais are trying to act like they don't want to have contact with you, when you're helping somebody.

See it as it is. A disease we all can get. Don't give up. You'll never walk alone.

"You'll never walk alone."

Sounds like a bit of a retarded comment to me.

You got aids, you have a serious problem that you can't share.

But you seem so understanding not like those Thais you refer to who are acting like they don't want to know.

. I did 9 for luck hope you approve.

[saakura]

just make sure you don't come into contact with the sheets too soon after he has been masturbating.

The chap seems to be in a bad condition and masturbation may be the last thing on his mind. The pus oozing out of the sores on his neck maybe more dangerous if he indeed has aids. Buy a couple of those health check up programs sold in all hospitals and tell him you got it from somebody else for free and drag him to a hospital.

[pauleddy]

HIV does not survive long outside the human body (such as on surfaces), and it cannot reproduce. It is not spread by

• Air or water.
• Insects, including mosquitoes or ticks.
• Saliva, tears, or sweat. There is no documented case of HIV being transmitted by spitting.
• Casual contact like shaking hands or sharing dishes.
• Closed-mouth or “social” kissing
• Toilet seats. (www.cdc.gov)

That's amazing, where did you get this info?

DH

CDC is the Centre for Communicable Diseases. That's why I posted the URL in my message.

[ableguy]

Idiotic and homophobic reply from jomcondo.

In the world, more straight people have HIV than gay people. The virus can only live outside of the body for 8-20 seconds (depends which book you read).

Going through the process of being ill with AIDS is actually very scary and debilitating. Actually, AIDs and HIV are not the same thing.

The guy will get better and stronger with the meds. The sores, which may well be KS, will heal up within 2-12 months. Once his CD4 count rises, the body gets better--and even if he does have the HIV virus, it will maybe become undetectable (which also means that his body fluids carry virtually a minimum risk).

People who take the combination therapy (i.e. the meds) can now have a normal life, and live to 70 or 80 like everybody else.

Nasty comments are very ignorant and reflect a 1980s mentality of prejudice and lack of knowledge.

Around 6-10% of the population is gay or bisexual. In a world of 7 billion people, that means that 500 to 700 million people are gay or bi. Enough people to make 10-14 Thailands or Britains. Enough to make 2 USAs.

Eddy

Enjoy your life. Sooner you than me.

[olddoc]

A lot of nonsense and mis- information being posted here !

Go to Sheryl's fixed link at

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/169704-hiv-aids-and-conspiracy-theories/

For real information

Edited February 20, 2014 by olddoc

[steven100]

is this a troll post ?

Sent from my TR736 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[jocko]

is this a troll post ?

Sent from my TR736 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Troll post about HIV.

No you can check all my posts on TV and see if I ever done that or badmouthed anyone.

Much to serious a issue for made up posts.

Shame on you.

[thaipod]

Check his medication that has been prescribed to him by the hospital and you should have a good idea of his sickness.

As for him living with you maybe there needs to be a discussion with your wife about him living with you and how long.

[jocko]

Check his medication that has been prescribed to him by the hospital and you should have a good idea of his sickness.

As for him living with you maybe there needs to be a discussion with your wife about him living with you and how long.

Done that he is stayin 1 week sleeping on the sofa.

[louse1953]

just make sure you don't come into contact with the sheets too soon after he has been masturbating.

You are a <deleted>!

[louse1953]

just make sure you don't come into contact with the sheets too soon after he has been masturbating.

You sick freak.. I had lost many friends through HIV/AIDS. One of my family members is fighting the war within this system and the loss of face being more important than the loss of life.

And you dare to make jokes about an obviously very sick guy.Shame on you as a human being in the 21st century. You'd FAILED.

To the OP:

All symptoms seem to be caused by the HIV virus. A woman in my wife's village didn't even wash her own daughter, when she couldn't move anymore.

Another woman was being brought to the village to die. It's a stigma in Thailand and many people never tell their relatives when they hear that they're positive.

Try to be careful, as all body fluid can be infectious.I'd never gotten a real answer from doctors, if for example mosquitoes can transmit it to others.

A tiny drop of blood on his tooth brush can be dangerous for anybody, let's say having a little cut, or somebody using said brush....

The virus can survive for hours outside the body.( depending on the circumstances) You'll have to be very careful with all you're doing for him. Most important is to get the right medication.

Hospitals in Thailand usually only make a CD 4 count and once it's under 250, they start to give Retroviral drugs. Pretty new is that starting from this year, they also have to make a virus load test, per ml of blood. Only both results enable medical personal to give the right medication.

Sad is that those "medical personal" is mostly not really qualified to treat people the right way.

Seems that people had learned through the biggest mistake in history to give AZT in a high dosage to AIDS patients, which killed them all. Those who'd received placebos survived much longer.A good friend of mine, a good doctor, was one of the guys who made this "study" to see how AZT worked.

It worked well and finally killed all patients.

People here usually test CD 4's every six month. If you can do something, tell them to go for a virus load test as well. It's a law now, but often not understood here.A virus load test should be done annually.

Once you've got the guy on the right medication, he'll be able to go back to work, or whatever he does.

Should the CD 4's be under 200, it usually turns into AIDS and the patients die because of a TBC, lungs infections, or anything else, without medication. Once a patient is just in bed, not moving anymore, it's very difficult for all involved.

Many patients of TBC have to take their medication for six months, but many stop taking them, once they feel better. A huge mistake.

TBC is pretty common under HIV patients in Thailand and you should be very careful, as the open type is highly infectious, as well. A little cough and you'll get it, too.

Please don';t get disillusioned, as so many Thais are trying to act like they don't want to have contact with you, when you're helping somebody.

See it as it is. A disease we all can get. Don't give up. You'll never walk alone.

"You'll never walk alone."

Sounds like a bit of a retarded comment to me.

You got aids, you have a serious problem that you can't share.

But you seem so understanding not like those Thais you refer to who are acting like they don't want to know.

. I did 9 for luck hope you approve.

Retard comment yourself.You can share by showing compassion,and helping the best you can.Having a safe enviroment to stay is a great help.

[Ajaan]

Don't walk down the street without ringing a bell, and shouting "unclean... unclean..."

Get real, there is no danger from HIV. I am astounded by ignorance in 2014!

Exactly...my two questions to the OP are: "oh, are you planning to have sex with him?" and "are you planning to get a blood transfusion from him?" If the answer to the above two questions is "no," then even if he is HIV+ (which, btw, is still a huge assumption on your part, at this point, and nothing else), then you're being ridiculous in your "worries"...

[jocko]

Don't walk down the street without ringing a bell, and shouting "unclean... unclean..."

Get real, there is no danger from HIV. I am astounded by ignorance in 2014!

Exactly...my two questions to the OP are: "oh, are you planning to have sex with him?" and "are you planning to get a blood transfusion from him?" If the answer to the above two questions is "no," then even if he is HIV+ (which, btw, is still a huge assumption on your part, at this point, and nothing else), then you're being ridiculous in your "worries"...

The answer is no to your questions But with 2 young children in the house and weeping sores from his neck I think I have the right to be worried I was asking for advice and have got some info from some of the reply.

Thanks for your input.

[EvilDrSomkid]

It could be 3rd stage syphilis. Are the sores red?