Annoying Girlfriends Friends?

[laobali]

Be polite to her and start a conversation, and then drop the clanger, ''Gosh you are the first Lady Boy i have met and you seem nice''..

That should shut the *edited* up..

Still think this was the best response if the bitch was trying to be humorous by being insulting, the rejoinder should have been given (with a smile) and taken in the same way, even by the odd cretin. Remember the Thai smile is very important.

Edited March 11, 2014 by laobali

[Pii Kate]

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Not sure if you've lived here long......But the Thai's have a way of being really blunt!.....Asking "How much money do you Make?", "Are you rich?", "Do you have a rich friend for me?" and Yes....you are Fat!.....I've gotten used to it....it seems the Thai's do not have a brain filter for the things they say....

Most confusing, this paradox of saving face and being incredibly intrusive at the same time. I am an overweight woman and when I first came here I was stunned at the amount of taxi/tuk-tuk drivers who felt at liberty to poke my belly and laugh, "kin kaow"? Getting out of the cab, telling them they are rude maak, maak, in a very loud voice, that behavior has stopped. Ask about my income, retirement plan, rent, etc. Now, when asked where I am going, what I am doing, etc. I say 'out, I'm going out". No one asks further questins.

o

[OxfordWill]

In the majority of cases it is the Thai version of English "weather speak". A way to break the ice and smooth transition to conversation.

[Dogbreath]

You're.

Don't worry about it Fatso.

Haha am only big and fat where it counts, little boy

If being 6ft 3" and 210 Lbs is a little boy compared with you, then I am guilty as charged.

Your a fatso as well LOL

[fire2rescue99]

Ask her why her skin is so dark!

This will shut her up ......

'Sawadee cap dam_n pit pee.'

Roughly translated 'Hello, black one.'

That's a great retort. However, phonetically, (jus saying), I would try, " Sawadee Kahn, dum pit pee".

For emphasis upon the next meeting when she disses you: drop the Thai and use English. Simply call by her first name and add Super Black. So, if her name is Tik. Simply say, "Hey, Tik Super Black, nice to see you." Just keep on referring to her as Super Black. Her friends will giggle and maybe pick up on it.

Thai's know some English words. These are two they know and I have heard them refer to others in their circles using this. It's the same as calling you "ooun" or fat. It's a fact. You will not change their behavior. But perhaps you can have a little fun in your own fashion. Do fret to much.

You are in their world. Go with it. Own it, dude. Good luck

[fire2rescue99]

Ask her why her skin is so dark!

This will shut her up ......

'Sawadee cap dam_n pit pee.'

Roughly translated 'Hello, black one.'

That's a great retort. However, phonetically, (jus saying), I would try, " Sawadee Kahn, dum pit pee".

For emphasis upon the next meeting when she disses you: drop the Thai and use English. Simply call by her first name and add Super Black. So, if her name is Tik. Simply say, "Hey, Tik Super Black, nice to see you." Just keep on referring to her as Super Black. Her friends will giggle and maybe pick up on it.

Thai's know some English words. These are two they know and I have heard them refer to others in their circles using this. It's the same as calling you "ooun" or fat. It's a fact. You will not change their behavior. But perhaps you can have a little fun in your own fashion. Do fret to much.

You are in their world. Go with it. Own it, dude. Good luck

Sorry auto spell , I meant "kahp", not Kahn. As in Ghengis or Star Trek wrath.

[HOOD Robin]

in my opinion not worth to start a topic here...

[BenCrew]

OP, it is no problem, it's LOS normal. I get fed up with being called hansum all the time, but l live with it..........

Make sure you heard them right, it might have been 'ham sun' meaning 'short dick'!

[NoshowJones]

OP next time you see her and she speaks just pull away really quickly and start waving your hand under your nose as if someone has dropped one...

and say 'pak-men'

It worked for me....and I am just over 12 stone a.k.a 79 kilos

Gosh, is just over 12 stone really 79 kilos? That's about the same weight as me, I thought I was nearly 13 stone, so I'm only just over 12 stone. Not bad for 6ft tall.

[transam]

This is true.

Mrs.Trans had a phone call today from an old school friend that she hadn't heard from for over 30 years (someone gave her the phone number ).

The lady found out Mrs.Trans had a farang husband. The reason for the call........She had got into so much debt she needed to find a farang , so she asked my Mrs how she found me.

[Soutpeel]

This is true.

Mrs.Trans had a phone call today from an old school friend that she hadn't heard from for over 30 years (someone gave her the phone number ).

The lady found out Mrs.Trans had a farang husband. The reason for the call........She had got into so much debt she needed to find a farang , so she asked my Mrs how she found me.

Tell your Mrs to tell her friend go and look outside the 7/11's in Pattaya sure she can acquire one there LOL

[whoisyourdaddy]

She has no idea you are taking offense at her joking around about the truth. Like a redhead getting offended by ginger jokes. Same with old man, Pappa, not disrespectful attributes here.

Let her know - gently but seriously - your feelings are hurt and she'll stop, not like lower Brits and ockers that will gleefully step it up like chickens pecking at the sight of blood.

Or just suck it up get used to it TiT they mean no harm.

Agree. Thais are very matter of fact in their views of people, we call it blunt, perhaps even tactless. But westerners tend to be quite thin-skinned and very often have an attitude of being the center of the universe. Causes everyone to have to walk on eggshells around them for fear of making some unintended offense.

A friend's wife has a circle of friends, one of which is fat and all of them call her Uuan, that's her name. No big deal to any of them, including Uuan.

The other side of this is that it may indeed be intended as an insult, which can be dealt with in a direct manner and which usually stops the person from continuing. Then everyone can get on with life.

Circle of friends, OP is not in the circle of friends but a total stranger

Has that circle of friends even bothered to see how that one over weight girl feels when they call her a fat pig? I seriously doubt it, because they could not care less.

Good friends

There is a big difference between being called fat and being called a fat pig and it makes all the difference in how it's delivered. Fat Pig is indeed an intended insult but being called fat all depends on how it is used and to whom. Some people even used to be named "Fatty" among friends. Maybe it will even give them an incentive to lose weight, if they really care.

Many westerners filter everything through their politically correct visual prism and think that words mean the same to everyone else in the world. Well, they don't and we need to get used to it.

Righto, is that you own derived theory ? or you like to reference it to some study?

Yeah, politically correct? you mean actually thinking of someone else's feelings not just what good for your own amusement?

Why not make fun of a kid who stutter, i am sure he/she will not develop complex to speak, and will just be happy to be center of amusement for so called friends

Edited March 11, 2014 by whoisyourdaddy

[transam]

This is true.

Mrs.Trans had a phone call today from an old school friend that she hadn't heard from for over 30 years (someone gave her the phone number ).

The lady found out Mrs.Trans had a farang husband. The reason for the call........She had got into so much debt she needed to find a farang , so she asked my Mrs how she found me.

Tell your Mrs to tell her friend go and look outside the 7/11's in Pattaya sure she can acquire one there LOL

For sure, but the lady is up in the boonies.

[puck2]

......I was waiting on a taxi with my Girlfriend a few months ago and out of the Blue a lady says to me "Are you Pregnant?"...

I would answer

"Yes, of course. Last month we have had great sex, me in supine position. When young, my mom told me who is in supine position will get the baby."

[robertthebruce]

Be polite to her and start a conversation, and then drop the clanger, ''Gosh you are the first Lady Boy i have met and you seem nice''..

That should shut the *edited* up..

Gosh i feel like a ''Celebrity'' i have never had so much ''LIKES'' with a comment ever..

Oh well, put a smile on my face , but be warned the ''Claws'' could come out anytime..

Cheers

Robert.

[slipperylobster]

Maybe she is giving you a hint to start going the gym

I usually just get something like "You fat". then I say, "Hell yeah, but you ugly."

[slipperylobster]

Just noticed the OP's name.

Are you Welsh or Kiwi?

Is being one or the other a predisposition to being fat?

[givenall]

Maybe she is giving you a hint to start going the gym

Or find a new gf

Sent from my ST25i using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Still find a new gr since she does not stop her frd

Or read the OP again?

It is not the GF who is talking but work associate of GF

Sent from my ST25i using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[DLP]

Why not just ignore her, life is to short.

[Dimpys Dad]

Righto, is that you own derived theory ? or you like to reference it to some study?

Yeah, politically correct? you mean actually thinking of someone else's feelings not just what good for your own amusement?

Why not make fun of a kid who stutter, i am sure he/she will not develop complex to speak, and will just be happy to be center of amusement for so called friends

Are you a stutterer...or fat...or both? No problemo.

Cruel people are all over the place and they ridicule others about their appearance or behaviors, which is unacceptable. Being called a name because of one's appearance is not an automatic insult. I will jump to anyone's defense who is being purposefully abused or bullied because of their appearance or behavior. However, I more admire those who have turned the negative into a positive and have overcome it by humor or success and turned it to their advantage.

Fats Domino

Fatty Arbuckle

Minnesota Fats

And famous people who have overcome their stuttering

James Earl Jones

Nicole Kidman

Bruce Willis

Mel Tillis

John Melendez (uses the nickname Stutterin' John)

King George VI

[mrtoad]

Just noticed the OP's name.

Are you Welsh or Kiwi?

Is being one or the other a predisposition to being fat?

Depends if he's been out sheep bothering

[transam]

Righto, is that you own derived theory ? or you like to reference it to some study?

Yeah, politically correct? you mean actually thinking of someone else's feelings not just what good for your own amusement?

Why not make fun of a kid who stutter, i am sure he/she will not develop complex to speak, and will just be happy to be center of amusement for so called friends

Are you a stutterer...or fat...or both? No problemo.

Cruel people are all over the place and they ridicule others about their appearance or behaviors, which is unacceptable. Being called a name because of one's appearance is not an automatic insult. I will jump to anyone's defense who is being purposefully abused or bullied because of their appearance or behavior. However, I more admire those who have turned the negative into a positive and have overcome it by humor or success and turned it to their advantage.

Fats Domino

Fatty Arbuckle

Minnesota Fats

And famous people who have overcome their stuttering

James Earl Jones

Nicole Kidman

Bruce Willis

Mel Tillis

John Melendez (uses the nickname Stutterin' John)

King George VI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=KE-6HrwhrPQ

[whoisyourdaddy]

Righto, is that you own derived theory ? or you like to reference it to some study?

Yeah, politically correct? you mean actually thinking of someone else's feelings not just what good for your own amusement?

Why not make fun of a kid who stutter, i am sure he/she will not develop complex to speak, and will just be happy to be center of amusement for so called friends:rolleyes:

Are you a stutterer...or fat...or both? No problemo.

Cruel people are all over the place and they ridicule others about their appearance or behaviors, which is unacceptable. Being called a name because of one's appearance is not an automatic insult. I will jump to anyone's defense who is being purposefully abused or bullied because of their appearance or behavior. However, I more admire those who have turned the negative into a positive and have overcome it by humor or success and turned it to their advantage.

Fats Domino

Fatty Arbuckle

Minnesota Fats

And famous people who have overcome their stuttering

James Earl Jones

Nicole Kidman

Bruce Willis

Mel Tillis

John Melendez (uses the nickname Stutterin' John)

King George VI

Being called a fat pig is an automatic insult. One does not need to be reminded of his/her personal "shortages" if you wish.

If you can not comprehend something as basic as that, i can not be bothered wasting my time trying to explain

PS. Stutter is something that can not be overcome if its a medical condition, please do not speak on subjects you have not got a clue about.

There are many reasons for someone to stutter and not all can be over come.

Furthermore since you not a personal friend of any of the people mentioned thankfully, you are in no position to post drivel on what they have done. Perhaps they did not have friends like you, who thought it was acceptable to make fun of them. Perhaps they had people with brain around them who encouraged and helped them.

[siamshepard]

Thank's for all the replies I was reluctant to respond to her in a insulting way as I have learned over my time here not to insult Thai's and have them lose face. It was not worth it but I suppose I can if I use humor in a situation like this one.

But I just think she has a chip on her shoulder as she is not pleasant to be around, and its not helped with her lack of English skills and she is not used to being around Foreigners. Anyway I have taken no offend but just got annoyed yesterday as is this all she can talk to me about or joke with me about, especially when no one was laughing..

Anyway I have recently started exercising and will have no belly within a month, I know as its only since I have came to the land of smiles that I have put on a bit of weight as where I was living before outside Bangkok they didn't know what a gym was, and the roads where too dangerous to jog on, and not a bit of greenery in site that I could exercise on without an overly protective Thai nearly getting a shotgun out on me for trespassing on there land. This happened to me when I crossed into someone land while fishing an angry Thai man came towards me shouting then left and the next thing he fire a few shots in the air from his property Crazy right...

Onwards and upwards I say, she is not worth my breath, but an interesting subject, I wonder what happens when a Thai moves to Farang Land and starts calling people fat? lol They are probably on some forum wondering why they have a black eye after calling someone Fat lol

Edited March 11, 2014 by siamshepard

[ThaiTrav]

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Not sure if you've lived here long......But the Thai's have a way of being really blunt!.....Asking "How much money do you Make?", "Are you rich?", "Do you have a rich friend for me?" and Yes....you are Fat!.....I've gotten used to it....it seems the Thai's do not have a brain filter for the things they say....

They don't have a brain full stop!

[Dimpys Dad]

Righto, is that you own derived theory ? or you like to reference it to some study?

Yeah, politically correct? you mean actually thinking of someone else's feelings not just what good for your own amusement?

Why not make fun of a kid who stutter, i am sure he/she will not develop complex to speak, and will just be happy to be center of amusement for so called friends:rolleyes:

Are you a stutterer...or fat...or both? No problemo.

Cruel people are all over the place and they ridicule others about their appearance or behaviors, which is unacceptable. Being called a name because of one's appearance is not an automatic insult. I will jump to anyone's defense who is being purposefully abused or bullied because of their appearance or behavior. However, I more admire those who have turned the negative into a positive and have overcome it by humor or success and turned it to their advantage.

Fats Domino

Fatty Arbuckle

Minnesota Fats

And famous people who have overcome their stuttering

James Earl Jones

Nicole Kidman

Bruce Willis

Mel Tillis

John Melendez (uses the nickname Stutterin' John)

King George VI

Being called a fat pig is an automatic insult. One does not need to be reminded of his/her personal "shortages" if you wish.

If you can not comprehend something as basic as that, i can not be bothered wasting my time trying to explain

PS. Stutter is something that can not be overcome if its a medical condition, please do not speak on subjects you have not got a clue about.

There are many reasons for someone to stutter and not all can be over come.

Furthermore since you not a personal friend of any of the people mentioned thankfully, you are in no position to post drivel on what they have done. Perhaps they did not have friends like you, who thought it was acceptable to make fun of them. Perhaps they had people with brain around them who encouraged and helped them.

I do not understand your criticism. Did I not say in an earlier post... "Fat Pig is indeed an intended insult"...?

Your PS. I have made no statements concerning whether or not stuttering can be overcome, medical or otherwise. I can speak about what people have done in their own lives without being a medical authority on the subject.

Your last comment implies that one cannot admire those who have overcome things in their lives unless he knows them personally. Talk about drivel. You completely misrepresent what I have said and am trying to say. Contrary to your insinuations, if any of those people had been my friend I would have supported them in whatever capacity I had, if only to be a friend.

[wym]

Fat Pig is indeed an intended insult

"Fat Pig" is indeed a specific insult phrase in English.

But Thais do use pig, if not as a positive, certainly in a way that implies cute, like roly-poly, especially with children, since having fat kids is definitely considered positive.

In fact it's often a nickname loving parents will use.

Obviously in Muslim cultures, it's always derogatory, more so than in English, but I don't think it implies "greed" as it does in English.

Dog and buffalo are definitely insulting, as is snake for treachery, we do have that in common.

But mouse is definitely affectionate for someone young or small or otherwise junior in status.

The person that stated "pee" for an older person was insulting even to a woman just doesn't have a clue, that is always respectful.

Women not wanting to be reminded of their age is an entirely different manner.

I do think we westerners are WAY to sensitive and often assume offense is intended where it is not. See the endless repeated discussions about the neutral word "farang" - and no, let's not start that again please!

And even if offense IS intended, just stupid to actually take offense IMO, like water off a ducks back, shrug and move on, you can choose who you associate with after all, don't need to make an international incident out of it.

Especially if it's the truth - I am old and fat and otherwise physically unattractive, and am OK with people verbally acknowledging these things.

And see the OP is now motivated to get back to being thin - she's actually done him a big favor here!

[namdocmai]

Many collegues of my wife point at my belly when we meet them. I 'm not fat but they are very skinny. It is just a way to make contact, they have nothing else to say and barely speak english at all.

I also make fun of their small body's, arms as big as my fingers or anything i can think of.

Don't take it so serious. Also there are plenty lowclass people in Thailand, they don't even know the word manner. They come from abandoned area's where everything still goes like 200 years ago. When they come to the big apple they have no idea how to behave.

[wym]

No, they have very well refined manners that they know exactly how to use when the situation calls for it.

They are just different manners from ours.

Everybody raised in a monoculture things that set of rules is "the one right way".

Just isn't so. Blow your nose in public so people can hear you? As bad as audibly farting here. But picking the dried boogers out with your long pinkie fingernail, not so much. . .

The more educated non-poor classes here have been influenced for over a hundred years now by their "betters" exposure to western mores, so by now their own are more in line with ours, so they SEEM more "polite" than the more native rural poor.

But believe me the rural poor here probably more universally adhere to their own social rules more so than the corresponding classes do back home. IOW they are more polite by their standards.

Edited March 11, 2014 by wym

[whoisyourdaddy]

Fat Pig is indeed an intended insult

"Fat Pig" is indeed a specific insult phrase in English.

But Thais do use pig, if not as a positive, certainly in a way that implies cute, like roly-poly, especially with children, since having fat kids is definitely considered positive.

In fact it's often a nickname loving parents will use.

Obviously in Muslim cultures, it's always derogatory, more so than in English, but I don't think it implies "greed" as it does in English.

Dog and buffalo are definitely insulting, as is snake for treachery, we do have that in common.

But mouse is definitely affectionate for someone young or small or otherwise junior in status.

The person that stated "pee" for an older person was insulting even to a woman just doesn't have a clue, that is always respectful.

Women not wanting to be reminded of their age is an entirely different manner.

I do think we westerners are WAY to sensitive and often assume offense is intended where it is not. See the endless repeated discussions about the neutral word "farang" - and no, let's not start that again please!

And even if offense IS intended, just stupid to actually take offense IMO, like water off a ducks back, shrug and move on, you can choose who you associate with after all, don't need to make an international incident out of it.

Especially if it's the truth - I am old and fat and otherwise physically unattractive, and am OK with people verbally acknowledging these things.

And see the OP is now motivated to get back to being thin - she's actually done him a big favor here!

With all due respect, but while appearing to know and understand Thai culture, i do not think you understand much of it at all.

It is impolite to offend someone in any way what so ever.

What parents call their kids has no relevance to OP, as it was not a parent addressing a kid, but an adult addressing another adult, a stranger

It is irrelevant what husband or wife call each other or gf and bf, because again for the same reason, it was an adult stranger addressing another adult stranger.

Term "fat pig" in Thai can be used in both "so called loving term" and an insulting term, when there is a fight or an argument between 2 Thai's, the skinnier one would abuse the bigger one as "fat pig", i seriously doubt the skinny one means it as a loving term.

Not all Westerners are sensitive or intelligent enough to comprehend simple etiquette just like some Thai's in Thailand

There is plenty of shit in every country.

In case of OP, the "friend" was out of order, rude and ignorant ill mannered bitch and there is no excuse for her behavior, you trying to justify it i guess speaks volume of your manners, sadly