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Posted

I've lived here almost three years and it recently dawned on me there are no Thai men I'd call my friend. There's a couple guys I message now and then. But we rarely, if ever spend time together. And then there's the male friends of my Thai female friends. But I never meet up with those guys independently.

Not saying anything negative about Thais here. I realize some people just don't connect or relate. And it's hard to understand where an immigrant/expat is coming from. I had a lot of foreign acquaintances growing up in USA, but outside of kids I grew up with I can't say any of them were my friend either.

That being said, people I know that have lived in neighboring countries (Laos, Cambodia, etc.) say the men there are very approachable and easier to connect with. I've sensed it too. The attitude seems more westernized in those countries.

Anyway, just wondering what the rest of you think. Are you friends with any Thai men (not counting boyfriends or giks, if you're a woman or gay man)? And what's your general feelings towards Thai men?

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Posted

I have plenty of Thai male friends both younger and older. They are not much different from expat friends except type of activity relax and location. My Thai male friends do like to hang around in large groups and drink. Some groups regularly play golf or go to massages. Other groups like to play football or tennis.

They do tend to get quite chatty but mainly in Thai.

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

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Posted

Been here 14 years and never had or highly unlikely to ever have a Thai male friend.

Absolutely nothing in common with them whatsoever. Anyone who says they have 'Thai friends' are very odd people IMO.

I'd say your the odd one. You have lived in a country for 14 years and haven't made one friend from that country.

No, I agree with Pat.

I've made many friends here, none of them Thai.

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Posted

in 20+ yrs coming backing and forth here i have a total of 3. there not rich by any means but i would trust them with my bank account. (not that I am wealthy either) but to them i probably look like I am doing ok.All 3 are educated and quite knowledgeable of the west on politics, sports, culture all at different degrees depending on what they are more interested in. they have steered me in the right direction many times. now that i think of it they are all Chinese Thai........

but i think it is strange that after all the time here its a total of 3.....

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Posted

I have a Thai group of friends that I can go out and party with any time. They regularly invite me out. They're decently educated, wealthy and many of them have lived/studied overseas. That being said there are still major cultural differences that prevent us from clicking. It's much easier for me to make close friends with westerners, especially the ones from my own country.

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Posted

I know a few good Thai males who I hang out with sometimes but I wouldn't call them best friends, my wifes family has also great males in the fam. who are not bad to have around.

must say that if I had to pick 2 'favorites' it comes down to 2 gay guys, while I am happy with the missus they seem to be more interested or less scared for western culture. or maybe they just not have to be jalous I pick on their gf's ;)

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Posted

Been here 14 years and never had or highly unlikely to ever have a Thai male friend.

Absolutely nothing in common with them whatsoever. Anyone who says they have 'Thai friends' are very odd people IMO.

I'd say your the odd one. You have lived in a country for 14 years and haven't made one friend from that country.

No, I agree with Pat.

I've made many friends here, none of them Thai.

I'm sure you might agree with him, that just makes both of you odd to me. You move to a foreign country and spend most of your time around other foreigners. 14 years in a foreign country and not 1 friends from there is weird. That is not normal social behavior. What would you say of someone who immigrated to your home country and didn't have a single friend from there after 14 years?

While I agree it's difficult to connect with Thais, I'd say it's a bit harsh to call any foreigner with Thai friends an odd person. At the same time, I don't feel it's abnormal to admit you don't connect with locals. I know plenty of immigrants in USA that stick to their own kind. They may have several American acquaintances, but the connection that's necessary for true friendship is just not there for many of them.

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Posted

So why aren't they my friends?

Well, I would say, their limited education, lack of world travel, and limited opinions, all imposed on them by their state and their society.

Not to mention their xenophobia and love and support for everything Thai, the new master race.

You may want to read that back to yourself. I think it contains a hint as to why you don't have any Thai friends.

Yes, they aren't interesting enough to be my friends.

My friends are currently snowboarding in the USA, others are hiking in Nepal (next week), yet more are going on Safari and walking up Kilimanjaro. In the west. Summers were spent scuba diving or sailing somewhere warm, in winter I went skiing and skeet shooting.

How can any Thais match up with that lifestyle?

I'd rather read a book on my own!

Or hike in the jungle.

I guess you guys that have Thai friends are just as dull as the Thais, not everyone can be interesting.

You have never met my ex kick boxing champ pal, so how can you say he is dull. ?

I can tell you he is far from dull and we have a good laugh.

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Posted

Do you speak Thai?I think this is a huge different between those can speak Thai and those can't.

I do not speak Thai, my Thai chum understands very little English but we get by with our eyes and face stuff. Good fun, course Mrs.Trans helps out too with the difficult translation stuff. Must admit, we have one thing in common though which I cannot reveal here. smile.png

No, we are not gay............laugh.png

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Posted

Do you speak Thai?I think this is a huge different between those can speak Thai and those can't.

I do not speak Thai, my Thai chum understands very little English but we get by with our eyes and face stuff. Good fun, course Mrs.Trans helps out too with the difficult translation stuff. Must admit, we have one thing in common though which I cannot reveal here. smile.png

No, we are not gay............laugh.png

clap2.gif How do you know he is not gay if you haven't seduce him.

Posted

Same here.Lived in for 10 years and no Thai men friend.Had many friends in England,but here ?

Sent from my GT-I9070 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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Posted

To be fair, the only Thai males I get on well with are those with substantially more than me.

Those with less always seem to have some underlying issues about it, even if they aren't aware of them.

I couldn't give a crap how much somebody has, and have no ego, resentment or jealousy issues, not having these on both sides helps.

Just 3 days ago I pulled in to get gas in a suburb of BKK, as I stood off my bike a Thai punk shouted out 'Ai Farang' from an area where there was a few small groups of Thai guys.

I said it to my mother when I got home (she's here on holidays) and she said that sure, your bike is probably much nicer than his. I said yes, but so what? 3 of my clients live in US$1 Million+ houses, one has two 50 Million baht houses in one big plot so her parents can use the other one when they come by. I have no sense of envy, jealousy, resentment, or any sort of negativity.... but then again, I'm not Thai.

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Posted

if you r here for the thai girls the thai guys would sense that and things could get testy.

Naw. Their more than happy to play a part in setting you up with Thai girls they have been through or Thai women that are looking for a gringo partner. Your part of the deal is to live up to everyone's expectations.

And that's where the difficulties can arise.

Friends though ?

No.

You'll do business together, get drunk together, play golf, watch a sporting event on TV, even chase tail together but if you were not "in their year" at Uni, or even High School you will not be seen as buddy material. They'll be polite. They'll call you to play a team sport maybe. That's it.

Unless you were in Uni with them back in the Old Country or you have some serious professional connection that makes you useful to them there's not going to be much hanging out.

Anyway, let's be truthful here. You might possibly end up with a good friend who just happens to be Thai but that isn't the norm.

And anyway here in Thailand, aside from farangledangle village bros you may tolerate and who may tolerate you, how many REAL European homies to you have as you get older.

Be honest with us and yo'sef.

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit."

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