riclag Posted March 18, 2014 Share Posted March 18, 2014 Hi, I'm not sure where to post this .School is out for now in Sakon Nakhon. My GF's 17 year old girl doesn't have any plans on doing anything but staying home and doing nothing (playing facebook ,housework and hanging around in the house .She is a good girl and has a 3.8 GPA. but there seems to be no initiative on her or her mother's part to occupy her time, constructively while she's on school holiday .I don't want to impose . I also know some children need supervision and directions . I'm just a live in Farang that pay's all the bills and I don't have a problem with that.I just think its very strange that she has nothing to do and she's not encouraged to do something about it . Is this typical for Issan village people. What options does she have while she's out ? I have no idea what opportunities these kids have up here in Issan. Please be polite and respectful of your comments Thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post aussiebebe Posted March 18, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted March 18, 2014 What your GF's kid is doing is typical of 17-year olds the world over. Just let her relax - Thai school must be horrifically stressful for kids to attend (my guess) and she'll have more of that presumably next year. You should be glad she's safe at home and not out with her 'friends'. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
culicine Posted March 18, 2014 Share Posted March 18, 2014 Most Bangkok kids this age go to cram schools for university entrance. In no way I endorse that, but perhaps she can do some extra lessons in your local town. Is she interested in learning more english? can you help? I wouldn't go much by the GPA as these are not standardised across schools. A student getting a 4 in one school could go to another school and only get a 3 or 2.5. The school holiday is way too long here and kids time needs to be used constructively. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siamshepard Posted March 18, 2014 Share Posted March 18, 2014 school holiday are for relaxing, your lucky she is not out on a rice field or something, I grow up on a Farm and had to work my school Holiday's, I hated it. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riclag Posted March 19, 2014 Author Share Posted March 19, 2014 Most Bangkok kids this age go to cram schools for university entrance. In no way I endorse that, but perhaps she can do some extra lessons in your local town. Is she interested in learning more english? can you help? I wouldn't go much by the GPA as these are not standardised across schools. A student getting a 4 in one school could go to another school and only get a 3 or 2.5. The school holiday is way too long here and kids time needs to be used constructively. Hi, Thank You for your quick response.Sorry if I wasn't more explicit but this isn't Bangkok its Sakon Nakhon,Issan . Yes ,I do help with her English. Her English has improved tremendously especially since she got over being shy. I will help her with her English homework only when she ask. I have suggested that we can do more basic learning but she gets flustered and carry's on so I don't bother to mention it anymore.I think theirs a lot to be said about structure and guidance in a suggested sense.I like this idea of researching on the university entrance examines Preparation can only help! I think if her friends suggest it she would go in a heart beat,lets hope .I don't want to beat this up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cornishcarlos Posted March 19, 2014 Share Posted March 19, 2014 She is lucky she is up North.. Down south they don't get a break, summer school is in full swing. Fortunately, my wife runs a summer school and we are packed out for the next 2 months. Even had to employ 2 extra teachers Buy her a crossbow and send her out to get dinner !!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted March 19, 2014 Share Posted March 19, 2014 Inflammatory post removed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belg Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 teach her english & math, 4 hours a day ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godden Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Now then, riskaaa,I'll ask my friend Gary G. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EASYDOGG Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 (edited) She is lucky she is up North.. Down south they don't get a break, summer school is in full swing. Fortunately, my wife runs a summer school and we are packed out for the next 2 months. Even had to employ 2 extra teachers Buy her a crossbow and send her out to get dinner !!! North-east actually, she's is in Isaan, not Chiang Rai! OP, I'd see if you could find a language school, which may also offer computer and science classes. although it will be closed for a few days over Songkran, or failing that find a local school teacher who could teach her daily. Edited March 29, 2014 by EASYDOGG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DekDaeng Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 (edited) Get broadband if you haven't got it already. Encourage her to browse - see what she would like to do for a career. She could even do an online course (MOOCs) & give herself a head start for college or uni. (Find a job you like, you will never work a day in your life!) Make her ask you at least 1 question every morning, and another in the afternoon! Edited March 29, 2014 by DekDaeng 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdanielmcev Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Let her play. Life's too short. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Windy Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Just be happy she hasn't started on Yaa baa yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperylobster Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 get her one of those food carts to push around....she can keep the profits after the cart is paid for. Need to work...old fashioned style...instead of having everything given without lifting a finger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ikbenhet Posted March 29, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted March 29, 2014 Maybe you can take her on a road trip through Thailand. She probably hasn't seen much of it yet. Maybe more of the family would like to join and you all could have the time of your live... Just a suggestion.. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcel1 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 argh.. summer schools, poor kids. That would not be my idea. but there is nothing worse than sitting at home doing nothing. like ikbenhet mentioned, go on a road trip or find other constructive fun things to do. Maybe if you're out in the sticks teach her to drive a car properly since she might be almost 18. or just other things, maybe good for your bond together. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluebluewater Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Get her a boyfriend. Your problems will not get better but they will be different! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyFriend You Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I agree, a family road trip is a bonding experience, I love to take trains, once went from Chiang Mai to Bangkok, then to Kuala Lumpur, took about six days and had a great time. I also have a friend that since he retired, he takes relatives Temple Touring, they find old temples throughout the Kingdom, study them and the teenager write school papers on their trips. Be sure to stop in Uthradadit Lumpang Lumpung etc etc etc.......... just writing here makes me want to jump on a train and just go.......... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davidmann Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 YES its normal ,take them to the west there the same Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tiffanystoyz Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 First of all You know the drill as a farang you know your an ATM so don't be in a rush to spend your baht on her I'm sure her Father is more than willing being an Honorable Thai would be more than happy to entertain his daughter during the holiday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sfbandung Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 You're talking about children and she's 17? That's a young adult not a kid. Raising adolescents 101. Particularly girls. Particularly pretty Issan girls. Keep them close. Involve her in what you and your missus are doing mostly and keep the blokes with unscrupulous intentions at bay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cornishcarlos Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 She is lucky she is up North.. Down south they don't get a break, summer school is in full swing. Fortunately, my wife runs a summer school and we are packed out for the next 2 months. Even had to employ 2 extra teachers Buy her a crossbow and send her out to get dinner !!! North-east actually, she's is in Isaan, not Chiang Rai! OP, I'd see if you could find a language school, which may also offer computer and science classes. although it will be closed for a few days over Songkran, or failing that find a local school teacher who could teach her daily. Potato, tomato... Whatever.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggt Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 (edited) Poor lass...too bad she can't just do what she wants with her holiday... Edited March 30, 2014 by ggt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phuketboy Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 (edited) She's not a kid, she's a young adult. I'm sure you would prefer her to be at home than out and about, running a muck or drinking with her friends. Like you mentioned she is staying home and doing housework, at least she is helping out. School would be stressful as well, especially at her age with some big decisions to make about university courses next year. Let her do her thing as long as she is doing the right thing, what have you really got to complain about? I do like the idea of a road trip as someone suggested. Maybe work out a plan with her and go and explore. I'm sure there is much of Thailand she hasn't seen and it's important for one to learn about the history and see their country. Edited March 30, 2014 by Phuketboy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TPG3 Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 ... especially at her age with some big decisions to make about university courses next year. ... As far as I have understood Thai culture, it's not about the kids to make the decisions, but the parents to make the decisions for their kids. I doubt that she is thinking about university courses for next year, as you mentioned her unambitious approach. Maybe you should sit down together with her and her mother to discuss exactly THAT. Maybe the output will lead to the right direction and you can prepare the according steps? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeavyDrinker Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I've was asked if I'd take my neighbour's 2 kids (15 and 17) with me in my daily walks along the canals of Lat Krabang and try and promote a sense of fitness awareness, plus a modicum of interest and respect in their environment, these last school holidays. Usually I'd blanch at the thought as my walks are great wool gathering and problem solving times of my day, however I've always got on with these kids. They're well behaved, smart as baked beans - especially with computers and all things tech related - as well as quite amusing. So it was a real good experience for me as I have a strong dislike for children usually. After as week I had about 7 of the buggers tagging along. Not even increasing the distance from my usual 6km to 8km didn't deter them (nearly done for me though). Didn't half win me some brownie points on the estate though. I think the key to the 'problem' here is to find a "new horizon" if you will, as in something outside of their usual sphere of interest or experience. When I showed the kids a beautiful Reticulated Python hanging in a tree, they were utterly thrilled to bits. I doubt they even knew such things could be found so close to their homes. Even a sight of the very common water monitors would draw exited reactions from them as would the huge storks (?) which come here at certain times of the year. The biggest plus for me was their reaction to the disgusting filth and litter in the canals, and when I explained how - in the future as the next middle class - to ensure people kept them clean, was their responsibility, I think (hope) they took that on board. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anon11 Posted April 3, 2014 Share Posted April 3, 2014 Please don't say you just pay the bills you live with this family they in their own way quitely look up to you try and talk to the boy ask what he want to do see if you can help PLEASE don't be just the guy who pays the bills he maybe 17 but he is worth SOME of your time and direction like any young person is. We have all been there as young people it's hard, harder here than where you came from I would imagine soften up a bit stop thinking you will be interferring please it's worth a try you have nothing to lose you may get something from him you did not expect..a THANK YOU... How good would that be, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richard10365 Posted April 8, 2014 Share Posted April 8, 2014 Maybe it's not the girl that needs something to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riclag Posted April 20, 2014 Author Share Posted April 20, 2014 Well I'm very happy I have many people's opinions.Believe me when I say I'm not a threat to this girls intellect. I just want to help with her education which will undoubtedly help her help herself to a better life as opposed to the life that many children have here that come from small villages in Issan with little hope of ever getting a higher education. It seems to me that many have suggested day trips .Her and her mother are very reluctant to do anything that suggests spending a day away together site seeing from the house especially when the sun is out ( black and white skin considered racism/peasant) mentality.I can understand thisThai skin thing so to speak I don't agree with it but thats another matter. We have a motorbike so were limited to the 3 of us traveling together.I offer to take a bus to get out and go somewhere different other then traveling to Udon on occasion but they have no ambition to try something different.I offer to go on walks in the park but the daughter doesn't want to go.I go with the mother only. I asked the mother why she and her don't bother to ask me to help read english .I don't know she replied ok I'll shrug that off .I won't bother to comment on some peoples opinions here because I find them insulting,my original post asked for only polite respectful comments. So far I'm leaning on the uncle that's a Professor in the University up here for guidance.I asked for his assistance just recently.He feels the same as I do. She must show initiative,she can't have everything done for her.He gave her a assignment. She is to check on and research what university she would like to attend to study for a law degree.and then report back to him since she expressed interest in having a education in law at some capacity. Its a start . ; -) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
riclag Posted April 20, 2014 Author Share Posted April 20, 2014 Your advice is well taken Thank You Please don't say you just pay the bills you live with this family they in their own way quitely look up to you try and talk to the boy ask what he want to do see if you can help PLEASE don't be just the guy who pays the bills he maybe 17 but he is worth SOME of your time and direction like any young person is. We have all been there as young people it's hard, harder here than where you came from I would imagine soften up a bit stop thinking you will be interferring please it's worth a try you have nothing to lose you may get something from him you did not expect..a THANK YOU... How good would that be, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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