Thai politics for dummies

[webfact]

STOPPAGE TIME
Thai politics for dummies
Tulsathit Taptim

Writer's note: Even the most complicated things (like Thai politics) can reach a "saturation" point of complexity, when all about them can be explained in the simplest ways. The following "Thai politics for idiots" has been requested by some foreigners and inspired by a great blog about the upcoming vote for Scottish independence. This is for all the nine-year-olds out there.

BANGKOK: -- Imagine a compact family consisting of a husband, wife and teenaged son. The man is a cheater, a frequent and very shrewd one. And although his record on child support is almost unblemished, the wife has had enough. Of course, the husband is the Pheu Thai Party, the wife its opponents and the boy the red shirts.

The man has been caught cheating time and again, but he's got the teenage child's full backing. Every man cheats, so what's the problem? the boy often argues. Daddy takes good care of him, and that's what matters. He takes the youngster to the hospital. He buys him an iPad. He's even planning to get the boy a fast car a few years from now.

"He's spending my money," the mother hisses at her son. "And you know why he has to pamper you? He wants to use you as a shield, because he knows I'm going to kill him."

She's right in a way. The man has been playing the sympathy card, and quite effectively so. Neighbours love him and view her with suspicion. He rarely spends money out of his own pocket on family matters. His own money, which she firmly believes has been siphoned off from her contributions, is allegedly used on luxurious personal trips and princely candlelit dinners with lovers.

The couple are engaged in an inheritance battle. She wants to wrest control of household finances from him, but he insists that, with the boy on his side, it's two against one. She has therefore been rebellious, and the fierce legal disputes have held back the family on all fronts. He can't freely spend, and she won't cook. The boy, meanwhile, has threatened to go on the rampage in support of his father.

Last week, the court said another inheritance hearing was needed. The husband had thought it was over, with him victorious. He was incensed by the court ruling, but the boy's reaction was more worrisome, because he started throwing things around. He's old enough to think of drastic measures, but maybe too young to exercise restraint.

The husband has been telling the neighbours that his wife often carries a kitchen knife around the house and so there is not much he can do. Once in a while he will show up next door with bruises. He was apologetic one time when a fire alarm went off and smoke billowed from the house, saying that because of his abusive wife, the boy was under a lot of stress.

The neighbours know the man is not entirely faithful to his wife. But to comprehend the real scale of cheating is difficult. It's a case of he-said-she-said, and what she says is often met with doubts and contempt. She's never friendly, to begin with, and more than once has yelled at the neighbours, asking them to "Mind your own business!"

She never cries in public, whereas he has blubbed a few times. The tears go well with stories of him having to sleep on the sofa or stay nights at friends' homes. "Without me the boy has no hope," the husband always says. "He hates the mother."

The kid is growing every day, and wanting more and more of a say on household issues. He's been bringing money into the family as well, which is another reason why he's defying the mother. Like his father, the teenager is well-loved by the neighbours, despite a reputation for rowdiness and occasional violence. "With a mother like that…" one neighbour comments.

The inheritance matter is threatening to tear the already strife-torn family even further apart. He's a big cheat and must not be allowed anywhere near the family's coffer ever again, she says. That will be at the expense of the child, who is the family's future, he shoots back. Oh yes, hiding behind the boy again, she shouts. That's nice coming from someone holding a kitchen knife, he scoffs.

And on and on this will go. He never says sorry for cheating, and she never says sorry for beating him up. The new inheritance hearing may or may not happen. It may hand financial power to her or return it to him. Nothing will likely matter. The neighbours will keep on gossiping about her or boycotting her. Not that she will care. The boy, in good faith or with blind faith, will keep fighting for the father. Nobody knows how this will end.

Writer's note (2): You wonder why they don't just get a divorce. After all, if both sides think they are absolutely right, it's time to go separate ways, right? Well, let's just say he still needs the money and she, deep down, still needs the boy to "complete" her. As for the teenager, maybe this turmoil is an essential part of growing up. What's that again? Does the couple need to grow up, too? You tell me.


-- The Nation 2014-03-26

[bino]

Complete and utter drivel.

Requested by foreigners, and they write something like this? It makes me wonder who the dummies are.... the readers or the writers.

[ChrisY1]

Another waste of this journalists.....not so skilled are they? )....

Headline should read.."Dummies in Thai Politics"

[DirtFarmer]

These guys get paid for this..

[Siripon]

A very funny article from Tulsathit, it's obvious the parents need a marriage guidance counsellor, however the son won't accept this.

I recommend improving the son's education, it can't be denied he is easily swayed by gifts regardless of the source.

Plus his temper needs curbing, only 2 days he attacked a monk over nothing.

We have to accept neither parent is likely to change, bad feelings run deep there.

Send the son to a good school and hopefully he will grow up to be a good citizen and start his own family, leaving his parents to squabble alone.

[Hobiecat]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

[yourauntbob]

I opened this article thinking i might get a good analogy or insight into Thai politics, instead i got a thinly masked propoganda piece.

So the Pheu Thai are evil cheaters, the red shirts are greedy takers, and the yellows are perfect angels that are doing their best to make the situation work...............give me a break ............. .........

[ozsamurai]

I thought "Thai politics for Dummies" was the party application form..

[Fryslan boppe]

Written by, and for PAD-Dem's and all their anti-democrat friends, who will buy into this stuff.

Something about 'Dummies", right!

Edited March 26, 2014 by Fryslan boppe

[tomyummer]

So as a 9 year old I will write this gingerly.

So grandpa won't get involved at all, the husband hates the in-laws, the husband's younger sister might actually be his niece, the wife really talks too much with too little action and should be forced to swallow the security whistle in her purse and deserves a slap once in a while, and the son who should have the belt to his behind for being so unruly so often is actually a hermaphrodite and should actually be sent to boarding school in Africa never to return.

Maybe the whole family should clean the darned house as it's so poorly designed and dirty, plumbing doesn't work and floods often, the lights are always on, the driveway is full of potholes and sloppy overpaid paving, and things in the house are all fake. The family should renovate the house and make it much more welcoming for visitors. And stop the fake smiles and speaking behind guests' back thinking they don't understand.

Maybe some design changes and opinions from guests should be welcomed to make the house more appealing, especially to other neighbors and towns who seem to run their households much better.

Edited March 26, 2014 by tomyummer

[BWPattaya]

I have just wasted 5 minutes reading rubbish.

[bigbamboo]

Perhaps the writer could send this idiot's guide to Thai politics to the idiot politicians.

Most foreigners are either amused or bemused by Thai politics and it's one redeeming feature is the endless entertainment it provides.

[DrTuner]

Only way to explain anything Thai style is to make a soap drama out of it.

[lemonjelly]

Written by, and for PAD-Dem's and all their anti-democrat friends, who will buy into this stuff.

Something about 'Dummies", right!

you forgot to say "coup mongerer" ....... lul

[Johnnie99]

The headline is an oxymoron, surely.

[Johnnie99]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

Quite right.

But then if you don't like it here, there's an easy solution.

[thesetat2013]

The headline is an oxymoron, surely.

I agree as I'm feeling pretty stupid right now having wasted my time reading the whole article.

Sent from my GT-S5310 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[northernjohn]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

You are of course 100% correct.

How ever the Bangkok post realizes the type of people Thai Visa is reaching out to and is not interested there fore they will not give permission to Thai Visa to use them.

The Bangkok Post has it's failings also but is as you say a much more reliable source of Thai news. Hardly a day goes by that they do not report another terrorist attack in the south. the Nation can not afford to report that as it would make it look like the government was failing.

On the subject politics for dummies I believe there was one mistake. The son does not bring money into the family. He gets it from his father.

[GeckosDiving]

Is this not what the Red Shirts hand out to the followers at their rally's Thai politics for dummies

Edited March 26, 2014 by GeckosDiving

[HerIndoors]

Pass me the vomit bucket...this kind of article is EXACTLY what is wrong with Thai politics...overly simplistic, biased and purile. Where does accountability of the Thai people come in who have allowed this monstrosity that masquerades as democracy (both sides) to flourish???

Just wasted 4 minutes of my life !

[Donnie Brasco]

I have just wasted 5 minutes reading rubbish.

Uh uh.

Add years to your life.

Learn to spot the early signs of "rubbish".

Khun Tabtim's by-line is a sure-fire "rubbish" indicator.

I guess back in J school, Mr. Tabtim's instructors would have been so ecstatic whenever he broke out a metaphor (and stayed the course until its wheels fell off) that they would never have required facts and argument to justify it.

When it comes to analogy in political argument here, I rather like the, um, one-armed paper-hanger analogy.

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit. . . . "

[ThailandNoob]

Isn't the wife overreacting by planning to "kill" the husband? This is worse than any threats by the son "to go on the rampage".

Anyway I have a few more things that need to go into the article:

The wife also cheats on the husband, and has been caught red handed siphoning off money for herself (that she was allegedly going to use to start a palm oil venture).

The wife was spending money on herself to an even greater extent, but was too stingy to spend money on the son at all. This went on to the point where there was no money for the son to get medical treatment. It was only when the husband put his foot down that the son was able to go to the doctor at all.

The only reason the boy has been able to bring money in for the family at all is because his father let him have a loan to start up a small business. If he had had this money years ago, he could have started bringing in money for the family a long time ago.

Part of the reason the wife is disliked by the neighbours is because she is being petty about a land dispute with one of them. The land dispute concerns a monument built by a neighbour's ancestors sitting right on the land boundary. Things have got so heated that in the past the wife has had fisticuffs with her neighbour over this. The teenage boy, who spend a lot of time playing in the area as a child and as a result knows the area better than the wife, insists that the land belongs to the neighbour and that she is just making trouble to divert attention away from the issues at home.

The town judge is notoriously bent, and will rule that black is white for those with the right money and connections. Recently he has let the son of the local energy drink salesman off the hook for killing a policeman, as well as the daughter of another local businessman, who caused a terrible accident by driving the wrong way on a freeway.

He is also very chummy with the wife, who he went to school with. The husband has pressed charges against her for domestic violence, but she doesn't even bother to show up to court half the time and the judge lets it slide. The judge also blatantly ignores evidence presented by the husband showing his wife's violence. He even has her on tape threatening to kill him, but the judge wouldn't let it be entered into evidence for mysterious reasons. The son has realised this and that is why he has become so angry recently.

Sent from my IS11T using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Edited March 26, 2014 by ThailandNoob

[antimedia]

To all you little darlings out there that must have had an unhappy childhood, lighten up, get a life, the years are rushing you by. The piece was a gem, a lighthearted take on the truth, accept it for what it is, a small detour around the daily doom and gloom nonchalantly reported by second rate tabloids and their equally moronic reporters.

[rametindallas]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

Talk to the Bangkok Post. They are the ones who won't allow their article to be linked on this forum. Couple of others also. It's in the forum rules.

[animatic]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

You are of course 100% correct.

How ever the Bangkok post realizes the type of people Thai Visa is reaching out to and is not interested there fore they will not give permission to Thai Visa to use them.

The Bangkok Post has it's failings also but is as you say a much more reliable source of Thai news. Hardly a day goes by that they do not report another terrorist attack in the south. the Nation can not afford to report that as it would make it look like the government was failing.

On the subject politics for dummies I believe there was one mistake. The son does not bring money into the family. He gets it from his father.

Has nothing to do with that.

It is purely same market deals between the two largest papers and their agreements with net providers. TVF has a specific deal with TVF to provide no charge access rights to their headlines and stories as the come on line. In relative retaliation BP refuses the same to TVF so their stuff only goes out where they say and doesn't benefit their competitors market. And if I remember correctly, both were approached and BP refused to do a deal and Nation did.

Nothing deeper than that.

References can be made to BP stories, but not cut and paste or direct quotes.

But that is the limit of access legally.

Edited March 26, 2014 by animatic

[luckytrev]

Its more like:

Now, many many years ago

When he was twenty three
he was married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be

This widow had a grown-up daughter
She had hair of red
His father fell in love with her
And soon the two were wed

This made his dad his son-in-law
And changed his very life
His daughter was his mother
'Cause she was his father's wife

To complicate the matters
Even though it brought him joy
he soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy

His little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad
And so became his uncle
Though it made him very sad

For if he was his uncle
That also made him the brother
Of the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was his step-mother

His father's wife then had a son
That kept them on the run
And he became his grandchild
For he was his daughter's son

His wife is now his mother's mother
And it makes him blue
Because, she is his wife
She's his grandmother too

Now, if his wife is his grandmother
Then, he is her grandchild
And every time hes think of it
It nearly drives him wild

For now he have become
The strangest case you ever saw
As the husband of his grandmother
He is is own own grandpa

[arjunadawn]

"____ for Dummies" type books are not really for dummies, they are intended to educate, in the simplest manner, curious people on new tasks and subjects. However, this article is for morons, imbeciles, and the least informed among us. It does nothing to illuminate the complex mechanics of current Thai polity.

The Author makes a Freudian confession, and reveals himself as the Dummy.

[Maggusoil]

Complete and utter drivel.

Requested by foreigners, and they write something like this? It makes me wonder who the dummies are.... the readers or the writers.

Without true freedom of the press, the third cornerstone of true democracy, they have to come up with drivel.

As for explaining anything !!!

Oh give us a break. That really is the pits.

[MunterHunter]

I'm curious why Thai Visa will not pull any articles out of the Bangkok Post. It's a far better source of news. I guess if that happened there wouldn't be anything for people to whine about.

Its a copyright/permission thing. BP dont 'allow' Thaivisa to post their stories.

[RubbaJohnny]

The headline is an oxymoron, surely.

Nicely put,my valet informs me the local phrase is buffalo-moron