Heart Broken!

[A. BOOZER]

Aging Mildred was a 93 year-old woman who was particularly despondent over

the recent death of her husband Earl. She decided that she would just kill

herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over

with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to

shoot herself in the heart since it was so badly broken in the first place.

Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to

someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where

the heart would be. "On a woman," the doctor said, "your heart would be just

below your left breast."

Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound

to her knee.