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Thai neighbour regularly abuses his girlfriend/wife


kandi

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My step daughter got into an abusive relationship.

She told my wife.

My wife and her ex have little contact, but they are all related one way or another.

She informed him and the rest of the family.

I was kept well out of it.

The situation was sorted Thai style.

Police are a no no, as someone pointed out they will rat on you.

If the girl has no family to turn to, then I am afraid that any intervention by an outsider will end badly.

I know my family and they will not resort to force at first, but in numbers make it clear what the consequences are.

In a worst case scenario this can lead to family feuds, which is why as much as possible the traditional family , village set up, is to keep all related in some way.

True even in Bangkok.

I am the outsider or was, but am now part of this. If I need help, with any aspect of little difficulties I turn to the head of the family, my father in law.

Never do things alone. You might think you know the culture, but stepping out of line will serve you no good.

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From the OP: "...Tell the management? I thought about writing an anonymous letter to the condo management to tell them what's going on in this room...."

I believe this is a good approach. You ought to be commended for caring!

Caring is absolutly S hiT. Really doesnt do any good!

ps. i care but wouldnt do a darn thing!

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As much as it pains me to say, I agree with the majority advice to stay well away and do nothing. Even an anonymous letter would likely get fingers pointing at the "farang next door"... you'll probably be a prime suspect for any complaints so do what everyone appears to be doing and ignore it.

There's really only a few end game scenarios here..... husband kills wife (unlikely), wife stabs husband (likely), they split amicably (most likely)

or they - once resolving their differences - live happily ever after (most unlikely).

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Here's an idea I've seen work. While the fighting is taking place, go upstairs with a new can of bright red spray paint. If there is no cctv cams about, walk up to their door and quietly write in THAI for them to shut the fock up!!!

Word will quickly get around about this and the guy will lose face and be forced to keep his loud mouth to himself. Problem hopefully solved.

If not, there's always the molotov cocktail approach. I'm not joking.

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Here's an idea I've seen work. While the fighting is taking place, go upstairs with a new can of bright red spray paint. If there is no cctv cams about, walk up to their door and quietly write in THAI for them to shut the fock up!!!

Word will quickly get around about this and the guy will lose face and be forced to keep his loud mouth to himself. Problem hopefully solved.

If not, there's always the molotov cocktail approach. I'm not joking.

I strongly advise you against this approach!

We Westerners are hot wired from birth to deal with things in a confrontational way, even politely.

Watch a debate on Western TV, or an interview on BBC or CNN!

Not Thai style, smile, remain silent or react very violently.

The smile stay silent does not mean it is all over amicably, pay back time will come!

Dare I mention Thai politics on this thread?

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Yes, a condo would be problematic. My bad. Collateral damage and all. Although...what good is a scorched earth policy if one can't implement it once in a while. Alright, forget the cocktail and stick with the spray can. Chok dee.

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?

You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

He was tacking the mick but you couldn't tell. Maybe your Ninja senses are off.

So where do you live now? Shoalin Temple?

Sent from my c64

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

What do you mean by "various security forces"? What was the "usual" you did in the army? How long were you in the army?
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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?

You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

How did or would you get on with a guy 5 mitres away with a 9 mm.?

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For all the people who advocate the do nothing / don't get invovled approach; I hope one day someone is beating the crap out of you and everyone stands around and takes the approach you advocate. You are pathetic.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing"

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?

You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I confirm ;i was taking the mick.

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For all the people who advocate the do nothing / don't get invovled approach; I hope one day someone is beating the crap out of you and everyone stands around and takes the approach you advocate. You are pathetic.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing"

I second that proposal and would like to add ... that all these guys asking stupid questions .. go train and learn some things... maybe it will stop you asking stupid questions and motivate you to get you're ar*** off your bar chairs and help the vulnerable. .. you're pathetic excuses of a Farang !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

What do you mean by "various security forces"? What was the "usual" you did in the army? How long were you in the army?
Classified info !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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Stay wel lout of it,common behavouir,and if you poke your nose in it may get cut off,never,never get yourself involved in a dispute between Thai's and man and wife/gf even more so, buy some earplugs and forget the whole thing,unless of course you are like Vin Diesel,or the rock,then you can intervene.

You can speak Thai, your wife can't understand what he is saying? Maybe he is not Thai at all, if that's the case, then a word with the local police might be in order, but only if you are sure he is assaulting her, not just hearing noises.

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For all the people who advocate the do nothing / don't get invovled approach; I hope one day someone is beating the crap out of you and everyone stands around and takes the approach you advocate. You are pathetic.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing"

I second that proposal and would like to add ... that all these guys asking stupid questions .. go train and learn some things... maybe it will stop you asking stupid questions and motivate you to get you're ar*** off your bar chairs and help the vulnerable. .. you're pathetic excuses of a Farang !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

And with one chop of his hand Bigehitetwarrior severs his keyboard in half!

Edited by marko kok prong
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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?

You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Unfortunately, when Thais want a revenge, they use a gun, does a martial art protect you ?

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i seen a man and woman beating the crap out of each other in a restaurant one sunday afternoon

roaring and screamig abuse at each other

he was calling her a whore and she went nuts and slapped him and he grabbed her by the neck and starting

slapping the jaws off her and dragged her inside the apartments but she was kicking and screaming

none of the thais intervened ,most looked away or pretended they didnt notice or just kept eating their noodles

as if it was nothing ,i was thinkig of helping but she did hit him first and i dont know the story of how it started either

so maybe she deserved it ,who knows TIT

She did not deserve it, only cowards hit women.

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Unfortunately, when Thais want a revenge, they use a gun, does a martial art protect you ?

It depends on you , what level training you have had , and how close you are to the person pointing a gun/knife/broken bottle etc... at you.

Yes it is possible to disarm the assailant quiet easily ..however...In general terms if someone points a gun at you and you don't know how to handle it ...run... or don't get into that situation in the first place !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

What do you mean by "various security forces"? What was the "usual" you did in the army? How long were you in the army?
Classified info !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Classified or fantasy?

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For all the people who advocate the do nothing / don't get invovled approach; I hope one day someone is beating the crap out of you and everyone stands around and takes the approach you advocate. You are pathetic.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing"

I second that proposal and would like to add ... that all these guys asking stupid questions .. go train and learn some things... maybe it will stop you asking stupid questions and motivate you to get you're ar*** off your bar chairs and help the vulnerable. .. you're pathetic excuses of a Farang !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

That's why they are on the bar stools - nothing gonna change it

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

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Don't let these wife beaters intimidate you.. i have travelled extensively and i am fortunate to have a martial arts background .. If I see a man hit a woman or abuse her or children .. i give him some of his own medicine..and it doesn't matter where he is from.. Some years ago I had a situation in soho London ..where a Chinese man (in chinatown) pushed his lady friend into a wooden structure outside of a shop being refurbished. He wasn't alone either and as I pushed him up on the wall has mate pulled a knife .. i gave his mate one look and he put the knife away... afterwards I helped the lady up and made sure she didn't require medical attention. My take on this... if you can...and only if you can .. you should always help a person if they cannot defend themselves... There is nothing worse than bullies ..and it doesn't matter where they come from... and as far as his friends on 15 motorbikes come to your front door... he pick up the phone call the cops... then deal with the bullie again amd again until he gets the message !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

I am wondering what martial art it is you do,Origami ,prehaps?
You really want to know? Or just taking the Mick ?

Ok from age 9 judo to age 18 then went to the army and did the usual.. then went to Japan and trained for 3 years under Sensei Toru Yamaguchi after which I studied Aikido.. i worked for many years in various security forces and also as personal bodyguard . Any more Questions ?...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

What do you mean by "various security forces"? What was the "usual" you did in the army? How long were you in the army?
Classified info !

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Classified or fantasy?

The old that's classified, chestnut,or "what i don't tell you,they can't get out of you later" chestnut,i am enjoying this posters contribution though, if he carries on in this rich vein of form,he will be up there with the likes of whereustay, and tingtongdingdong.

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In that circumstances,

I write a note, signed with, =A concerned resident= but nameless, in English and one in Thai, written by GF in which I state,

=if I notice that sounds again, I will inform immediately the authorities!=

Send it with mail or pass it under the door.

In nearly all times that alone helped, if not, I kept my word and the authorities found a solution!tongue.png

Did that a couple of times in different countries,

my home country - when I heard child crying more times and long times.

and elsewhere, when guests thought their rented room in hotel or apartment is a 24 hour Bar!

Or a drunk Falang beat his Thai GF regular,

or the Thai Gf of Falang, who had to walk on steel high heels above my room every day late in the night for endless time!

With Thais,

once a Thai was talking loudly next to the sleeping room of my 3 week young boy a meter from my rented rooms porch in Patong at 4 AM in the morning.

I walked out and he waved me to wait but not stopped talking and also did not walk away.

So, I thought, then I can clean my porch and surroundings and started a water hose and sprinkle very near him and nearer and nearer

and following him as he retreated until he was out of sight and no noise anymore!

Yes, next day my GF scolded me how dangerous that was, the man was a southern Thai policeman?

Also, he not approached me, but his wife apologized to my GF for him.

In the neighboring house of that complex I heard once a dog being hit and screaming loudly, without end,

I ran there and a deaf Thai man hit a (his?) dog who had eaten his eggs.

The hitting stopped!

All other problems I confronted in a bit diplomatic way first, I could manage without a fight or a problem for myself.

I maybe lucky, but I still think before I act.rolleyes.gif

Edited by ALFREDO
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