What % of your acquaintances and friends turned out to be doormats and were taken advantage off by t

[ppmacready]

Thanks for the tip on Cebu ppmacready. I need to visit the Philippines.

Place an advert in the Islands newspaper.

You can only advertise the position for a nurse to work in Fillys.

After the interviews you can please your self.

The trolls are gonna love this next paragraph.

I originally advertised for a teacher.

I was overwhelmed how ' accommodating' the ones I was interested in, were after a couple of interviews over dinner.

Now I'm getting older, the next time I go I will be advertising for a physiotherapist!

[marko kok prong]

There was a bloke i knew used to come for 3 month's and visit his lady, unaware that she had a different falang for each quarter of the year,when he stayed with her ,she would take off for days at a time never telling him where she was going,they used to visit us a bit,he used to walk around in a perpetual daze looking for her,"has anybody seen Fon,where is Fon", i told him i would not put up with it,"but she is a good lady ,she loves me' he used to reply,i am not one to judge people but he did seem to have blinker's on with this lady,my Mrs has sort of lost contact with her a bit and last i heard she was sick,but i think at last he woke up and has not been back to her for sometime,whilst i felt a little sorry,he was not a friend,only a guy i met,so i felt i had no right to tell him what was really going on if he could not work it out himself,but i had to shake my head at his meek ,subserviant attitude, i could never conduct myself in such a fashion.

[gerry123]

[RichBKK]

Only the thai men as it happens...ironically...

Edited June 6, 2014 by RichBKK

[marko kok prong]

Very cryptic Gerry,in fact so cryptic you have me stumped,the fish look like sardines,sardines follow the trawler or something?

[ppmacready]

Very cryptic Gerry,in fact so cryptic you have me stumped,the fish look like sardines,sardines follow the trawler or something?

Sounds fishy?

[gerry123]

Very cryptic Gerry,in fact so cryptic you have me stumped,the fish look like sardines,sardines follow the trawler or something?

Thanks glad you like it oh by the they are SPRATTS (another cryptic clue for you)

[AnotherOneAmerican]

None ,my friends are all normal ,decent human beings married to normal decent Thai women .they didn"t marry the first woman that told them how hansum they were just before they agreed a price for the night . grow up op.

I've yet to meet a white foreign guy married to a nice Thai lady.

Met plenty with hookers and gold-diggers firmly attached.

Easy cure, partners are not invited to our group meetings.

Leave them behind or don't come.

[shirtless]

This is not a game thats played exclusively in Thailand !

[arjunadawn]

Where's the category for the guys who have taken advantage of Thai women?

I was calculating my % in response to the question until I read this; kinda sobering. The first night I spent a week in Bkk I was certainly not looking for love or relationship. Nearly all the guys I know often came to Thailand to "play." There were surely Thai casualties from those engagements. I only later grew up. I think it might be fair to say the door swings both ways. Good point, JLCrab.

[InsideOut]

Where's the category for the guys who have taken advantage of Thai women?

Probably all over the internet. There are literally millions of studies suggesting females all around the world is taken advantage of by males. Feminism is even a strong ideology, who infiltrates even Universities, so if you are into that, just hook up with your local feminist, and you will get more than enough.

Just remember, don't believe in all crap the feminists are spitting out.

[Mudcrab]

None ,my friends are all normal ,decent human beings married to normal decent Thai women .they didn"t marry the first woman that told them how hansum they were just before they agreed a price for the night . grow up op.

I've yet to meet a white foreign guy married to a nice Thai lady.

Met plenty with hookers and gold-diggers firmly attached.

Easy cure, partners are not invited to our group meetings.

Leave them behind or don't come.

Think I'll give your grope meetings a pass, thankyou

[InsideOut]

And off the top of my head, I have 2 male friends who got played big time by their girls.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

I see the flip side of this quite frequently.

Young girl, catches what she thinks is a wealthy, older western man, because she only knows him while he is on vacation with a pocket full of spending money.

Fast forward a year, they are married, he may have built a house, probably not the palace he promised her.

He's 70+ with a minimal income, just enough to scrape up the visa requirements.

She's 30, and now spends her life working as a nursemaid, one that is also required to cater for her patient's sexual needs.

They don't go anywhere, he just wants to sit outside his house in a village somewhere, waiting to die. No more vacations, no more party times, just a scrape by on his minimum income existence.

Then he professes to be amazed and shocked several years later when she decides she's had enough of working as his slave, never having any fun, only taking care of an old man who wasn't the rich prince he professed to be when they met, and decides that the house is a suitable level of remuneration for her services to date, and kicks him to the curb.

Sound familiar?

+

Out of the many Thai ladies I know, most are happy if they have enough money to buy fish on a regular basis.

Sitting around at home with friends and family, eating, talking, watching baby, trip to the local food markets, and a TV for lakorn gives them a perfectly satisfactory life.

Vacations, going out & party times are gold-digger activities.

Very few married Thai ladies participate.

[Phoenix1312]

3 of my male friends have had relationships with a Thai. 1 is so burnt he can't even look at a woman, 1 was reported to police by her for abuse. She crawled back to him when he won lotto. That's all over now and he is broke and broken. The 3rd. Came home from work only to find the house cleared out and she was gone. It was 2 years to the day. She got her residency. I would have to say 100%. Still waiting for my ex husband to get burnt. Should be soon

[ppmacready]

And off the top of my head, I have 2 male friends who got played big time by their girls.

You haven't been here that long then! lol

[ppmacready]

None ,my friends are all normal ,decent human beings married to normal decent Thai women .they didn"t marry the first woman that told them how hansum they were just before they agreed a price for the night . grow up op.

I've yet to meet a white foreign guy married to a nice Thai lady.

Met plenty with hookers and gold-diggers firmly attached.

Easy cure, partners are not invited to our group meetings.

Leave them behind or don't come.

To be fair I do know some nice Thai ladies.

But you never know any women really.

Until the last day you know her!

[marko kok prong]

3 of my male friends have had relationships with a Thai. 1 is so burnt he can't even look at a woman, 1 was reported to police by her for abuse. She crawled back to him when he won lotto. That's all over now and he is broke and broken. The 3rd. Came home from work only to find the house cleared out and she was gone. It was 2 years to the day. She got her residency. I would have to say 100%. Still waiting for my ex husband to get burnt. Should be soon

As they say here"everything can happen".Hope your keeping well Phoenix.

[ppmacready]

3 of my male friends have had relationships with a Thai. 1 is so burnt he can't even look at a woman, 1 was reported to police by her for abuse. She crawled back to him when he won lotto. That's all over now and he is broke and broken. The 3rd. Came home from work only to find the house cleared out and she was gone. It was 2 years to the day. She got her residency. I would have to say 100%. Still waiting for my ex husband to get burnt. Should be soon

Re No1- I understand.

I'm sure thats what happened to a lot of guys I've met who are now dabbling with lady boys.

Re No3- I know of a guy that happened too twice!

Proving- you can't fix stupid!

Last sentence- Boys will be boys.

[Mudcrab]

3 of my male friends have had relationships with a Thai. 1 is so burnt he can't even look at a woman, 1 was reported to police by her for abuse. She crawled back to him when he won lotto. That's all over now and he is broke and broken. The 3rd. Came home from work only to find the house cleared out and she was gone. It was 2 years to the day. She got her residency. I would have to say 100%. Still waiting for my ex husband to get burnt. Should be soon

All three friends with the same Thai. Male or female?

You got burnt love...get over it.

[BadBouy]

3 of my male friends have had relationships with a Thai. 1 is so burnt he can't even look at a woman, 1 was reported to police by her for abuse. She crawled back to him when he won lotto. That's all over now and he is broke and broken. The 3rd. Came home from work only to find the house cleared out and she was gone. It was 2 years to the day. She got her residency. I would have to say 100%. Still waiting for my ex husband to get burnt. Should be soon

I hope you are not wishing this. Best to heal your heart and move on and in the end you will see he did you a big favor by leaving. It's happened to me also at home you will feel free when you can really let go. By the way karma came her way with in 10 years but she has 2 children and all I can feel is sadness for her and especially her children.

[marko kok prong]

Very cryptic Gerry,in fact so cryptic you have me stumped,the fish look like sardines,sardines follow the trawler or something?

Thanks glad you like it oh by the they are SPRATTS (another cryptic clue for you)

Just googled it,small forage fish that travel in large packs,is this what you were getting at or am i way off the mark here.

[wow64]

Why would you be friends with your doormat?

[olddutch]

Where i live there are a lot of farangs married with a Thai lady. And they are happy. And they work on a normal and real relation.Maybe they did not married the first girl they saw

Some are married for more than 20 years.So maybe it's not always the the Thai lady.

[ppmacready]

Why would you be friends with your doormat?

We have been friends decades.

He wasn't a 'doormat' until he came to Thailand trying to be a white knight etc

3 doses of VD, 35,000 pounds lighter and still not learnt his lesson.

Believe me, I'm only being polite !

I have told him to at least stop licking toilet seats !

[Mudcrab]

Where i live there are a lot of farangs married with a Thai lady. And they are happy. And they work on a normal and real relation.Maybe they did not married the first girl they saw

Some are married for more than 20 years.So maybe it's not always the the Thai lady.

out of likes olddutch but totally agree

[nsimmons]

Dose lady boy count for this post?

I went out with a girl for about a year here. Friends, after meeting her and many befriending her, I asked "what do you think" to many of them that spoke Thai and lived here for 20 years or more (as I knew I was new and she was younger). All of them said stuff like"seems you are on a winner there" , and "she is a very good sort etc". Both women and men all said positive things. I went to her home town met the family, father is a crane driver, mother is the typical big jovial woman, grandmother lived in house out back. Poor, but seemed salt of the earth etc.

I have lived in many countries am 54yo, been married twice, once for 6 years (when young) and secondly for 22 years, still friends with both etc. One of my closest female friends, American married to a Japaneses guy living in Tokyo, also became a good friend of hers.

When I finally tried to break up with her, and although she had promised when first getting together that

"if you ever want to break up I cause you no trouble, it is not my fault I am younger etc". When it finally

became obvious the age difference was an issue, and after many kindnesses, she went absolutely berzerk and stole

everything she could get her hands on, and turned in to an absolute monster. Before you judge, I was not even sleeping with her, just let her live with me, as before she was sleeping on the floor in a beauty salon (I met her getting a haircut).

After a very bad experience (first time in life I understood the saying, "no good deed goes unpunished"), getting repaid with brutal cruelty after taking her out of poverty, paying for mother's gall stone operation etc. My male

friends (80%!!!) came forward and said "I did not think she was like that", but then proceeded to tell me their stories of woe, and how badly they had been ripped off. One lost a new 4x4, one a house etc. I heard from a few that some men that loved the girl, killed themselves etc. Many said it is the "price of living here, and until it happens you won't believe it" etc. I had read all the books like "Private Dancer" and she spoke reasonable English and had been married before to Thai guy that died (so a widow, which I checked out and was true) and had owned a jewellery business. Obviously not a bar girl etc.

No matter how cautious I was, and no matter how much due diligence I applied, she still ripped me off blind and fooled all and sundry.

Please don't respond and say it is not just Thailand, you can't find such endemic behavior elsewhere, except *maybe* the Phillipines. Here is a response to one guy offering possible answers and my response..

(his take)

I have a theory for their overall behaviour patterns.

Basically, the vast majority of single mothers will be from low educated, low income, poor backgrounds where Mum and Dad (if still together as a family unit) can do nothing but try and make money whatever way they can.

It's not uncommon for the families to be breeding 5,6, 7 + kids. Where is the love and affection for these kids coming from? They simply get swallowed up into the complications of the family. The talk is about nothing but survival and money. When you listen to Thai's talk it is amazing how many of them have to indulge in a conversation about the cost of things and money.

You have a disagreement with them and they come straight at you with the financial statement. It's almost like a total obsession with them. When they see us they sense an opportunity. This is why the bar girls are the way they are. Totally ruthless, practically fanatical about getting money any way they can.

Their nurturing has placed them in a vulnerable, unloved position in life. They fill this void and deep insecurities by hooking onto our benevolence. They have no rationality because their own survival takes precedence over ANYTHING else!

This causes them to pursue ill-gotten gains, steal, cheat and hurt people without any remorse whatsoever. They have survived and that's all that matters!

(my response)

I think the above may be somewhat valid, but "M" only has one brother and parents are together, her father is a crane driver. I have been in many other poor countries, and I have found that if you are kind to someone, they generally feel very bad if they screw you over. "M" somehow seems to have twisted her mind to

believe she deserves half my assets, just coz I was very kind to her for a year??

When I met her, she was sleeping on the floor of a beauty shop with other girls and penniless.

She now has money and a business etc. Is there is even a word for gratitude in Thai?

I look at countries like India, with worse poverty, but the people still seem to have some morals.

I’m getting back about 10% of what she stole, the cop that promised about 25% was to meet on

Friday, but holiday, then today (Monday) we find he’s not back until Friday, he was probably bribed by her

to say that, so they could rape me for more…of course she flirted with all the cops and I had

watch them believe her bullshit.

====

And then this...

(pal)

Apparently all Thai's are the same, irrespective of where you meet them or education etc, apparently they do it to each other all the time.

I asked my pal, “How can she be so cruel after I paid for her moms multiple operations,

her own five times in hospital, getting her a laptop and a scooter and the trip to Aus etc etc etc etc?”

He says "right of passage if you try and live here. You won’t believe they can have no remorse or conscience

or basic honesty until you experience it”

(me)

I literally have known using heroin addicts that have far more ethics.

But you would/could never believe this unless you experience it.

It is soo far out of our Western values/beliefs. However Japanese are as honest as most, if not more honest than most.

So it is not an Asian thing, it must just be a Thai thing (which I am hearing repeatedly).

On this

http://newsletter.thaivisa.com/sendy/w/F9n6ijPfw5zlC4rdEWrOeg/GqO7cTr5rscAtvOrMfwaig/bQ6QHXd0892KMVdACXaZ969g

You often read where some Western guy kills himself over being “seduced/robbed/swindled/humiliated” by some Thai girl.

I used to think ….

“what a wimp” or “must be really gullible” and “he is old enough to be her father, can’t he see

she is just in it for the money?” etc etc.

Other negative stories you hear, you think the guy must have been really gullible/stupid/greedy/sex addict or

whatever.

Now I think….

"Poor bastard, would never have even seen it coming, probably way too trusting a guy to live in Thailand.”

And can relate completely, many lose their life savings.

Happens a lot….guys fall in love, she takes him for everything, he kills himself.

The ironic thing is, I bet they all think “that will show her”, “she will be sorry now” etc.

But the truth is she will not give a shit and simply wonder how she can gain from his death.

Thank God I never loved her, more of a sort of charity thing for me, we made it SUPER clear

and agreed that it was very likely a short relationship. (age etc, and she promised she was fine with that etc)

It still amazes me, the lack of conscience or even belief in Karma here (supposed to be Buddhist).

It really is corrupt on soooo many levels.

I am way too much of a trusting guy to be here (perfect 20/20 hindsight! tho ; )

I have lived by….

It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.

--Samuel Johnson

Works in most places, but not sure it applies here. Guy should have said ….

In England, It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.

--Samuel Johnson

Anyway, I will survive, many don’t, especially if they were truly trying to help someone, and then get robbed.

It is far worse to get raped by someone you are trying to help, rather than by a stranger.

So hard to believe, few believe it (like me) and so the system/scam/con-game goes on.

Not sure I want to live here, knowing everyone is out to scam me, and is insanely good at it.

Your pals warn you, but you can’t see it until you are hurt….. BAD.

=====

I hope this helps someone, I now play their game, act as the "super rich farang" that I am in their eyes, and that I will always be, and now watch the pretty little girls tell me lies, trying to be #2 to rob me, I even get "freebies" in their attempt to get at the "huge money by getting rich by marrying a farang", and when she says "I like fat guys" , I say "I like small breasts" or if she says "young man no good, older man better", I lie back in equal fashion.

Once bitten twice shy, and having a ball now that I know how the game is played.

Good luck to us all!

NS

PS Been visiting here (owned apartment) for 10 years, lived here for two, not interested in hearing how it is not just a Thai thing, or "what about the men that rip off Thai women?" If you believe that, you have no idea and have not researched properly.

[Mudcrab]

Where i live there are a lot of farangs married with a Thai lady. And they are happy. And they work on a normal and real relation.Maybe they did not married the first girl they saw

Some are married for more than 20 years.So maybe it's not always the the Thai lady.

out of likes olddutch but totally agree

I met my wife when I was 56....she was 48....funny old world isn't it. Do I wish I met her when she was 28 and I was 36...probably not....lifes like that.

[bobbyd1]

It works both ways, I have seen a heck of a lot of Guys taking advantage of the Girls here in Thailand. Unfortunately it is not discussed much here. Of which some stories are pretty sad. So, it takes two to tangle as they say. It is far to easy to pass judgement.

[Don Aleman]

125 % - some. including me, TWICE !