Short Term Monk for step son -party costs etc?

[casualbiker]

Ask her how much it would cost if she alone was paying for it.. it's here son after all. Bet it would be about 30-40k

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[David48]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Agreeing in part ...

"100,000 baht for a party for an eleven day monk? Seriously - have a good talk to your wife about that. Not a coin. She's taking the p*ss out of you. Big time."

My gf's nephew did exacty that.

There was a procession etc, the baht coin toss ... all true.

But Bt 100,000 is simply face.

There is an expectation to provide some sort of celebration and a food/drink reward for the procession ... but Bt 100,000 ... alt=facepalm.gif>

David,

Don't forget the OP, is speaking about an 11 day celebration.

Feeding and entertaining all people for 11 days..............

This is the full monty........can cost a lot.

In brief discussions with family I was told that the following happens:

2. day 1 prepare for party etc, buy monk robe etc.
3. 
   
4. day 2 go to wat and do the monk thing, i.e. shave head etc
5. 
   
6. night 2 party with food, drinks, dancing girls and band.
7. 
   
8. day 11 last day when step son is released, we provide him with new set of clothes

Party - food etc is only first 2 days to my knowledge?

Event still evolving.

Thanks

-P

costa ... no 11 day party mentioned.;b++){var>

Have you been involved with a novice Monk preparation?

.

[David48]

If you can afford it, why not.

Because it's wrong.

BIG Face comes at a price.

the White Guys's paying for it.

We create a rod for our own back.

[David48]

JUST FOR PERSPECTIVE ... we are discussing a Novice Monk entering for the Temple for less then 2 weeks.

If it was an Adult leaving the Family for a life as a Monk ... different Story.

IMHO ...

.

[jonnyscot]

Opinions on costs you're asking for, my opinion is forget about what one or two others have said, yes you should pay, by marrying your wife you also accept her son as part of the family also, as for the 100k, depending how lavish as others have suggested, but I think that's a wee but excessive for 100 guests, most relatives will help prepare the food, as for the thai drinks, a 4 or 5 cases of hong thong and some beer is fairly cheap,, and stow away the single malts for yourself,, I was horrified to see my FIL pour mine into a long glass topped up with coke,,,,,, I'd suggest a figure of around 50k to 60k excluding the dancing girls, by most thai standards that should give him a good send off,,, donation to temple around 4 or 5k remembering that it is just a donation,,, so whatever you want to donate,

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[petejjj]

Thanks jonnyscott. I'm happy to help but I'm not an ATM machine. As I mentioned earlier, my wedding in 2009 cost about 40k and that was for same amount of people, so I'm Happy to use that as my benchmark.

Agree re drinks. Did similar at wedding but provided bulk home brew thai whiskey. As soon as the beer ran out they hassled me to buy more. When I didn't they were happy to drink home brew whiskey. At the days end the uncle was decanting the home brew into any small bottle he could find. Free alcohol is some folks holly grail.

Thanks

P

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[Nautilus05]

100k for 11 day monkhood and village party? Whew!

I think your wife may be looking for a bonus. 50k for the party, 50k for her and the mom, and sister, and uncle, and whoever else.

If someone from an Issan village tried hitting me up for 100k for an 11 day monkhood party, I would just hysterically laugh for a while, then go grab a beer from the fridge without saying anything.

Tell them 20k, and let it go to 30k during the day of. That's lots for a village party to go be a monk for 11 days and be stripped of all material possessions. If they need more than that, tough titties for them.

Edited June 8, 2014 by Nautilus05

[jonesthebaker]

Many thanks krisb. My wife is suggesting around THB100k which I think is excess.

Band with dancing girls is approx THB12k.

I recall from our wedding there in 2009, it cost about THB40k for the party, and another THB40k for sin sod.

Many thanks

-Pete

ask how much the locals paid for the last kids monking party - and go with that. however, for thais it is more of an excuse to show off so your wife will feel she has lost face if she doesnt out do the local norm.

im sure the kid would rather have a 100k in the bank than have that amount spent on being a pretend monk for 11 days. obviously all kids dont do it otherwise you would see the processions almost everyday.

if my wife asked for 100k for some such thing (a years income for a teacher in a village) i would show her the door.

Edited June 8, 2014 by jonesthebaker

[Thaddeus]

Have you been involved with a novice Monk preparation?

.

I have.......

This was my Brother-in-Law.

The in-laws told me that even though I had married into the family I was neither parent, blood, Thai or Buddhist and I was not expected to make a contribution unless I really wanted to.

I changed a thousand Baht note in to 1 Baht coins and wrapped them in gold coloured foil paper myself, took hours, on the condition that I got to sit in the truck and throw them.

Tables were set up for family, family members who had moved away, and the people of the village.There were around 250 people.

There was no sound stage and no dancing girls. That is for weddings, not funerals and monkings.

This one I helped with, but I have attended countless others as a guest, and they have all followed the same criteria.

The total cost for this one was around 15K Baht, that was around 9 years ago, so I expect inflation will have had an effect on that number.

[somchaismith]

If you can afford it, why not.

I agree, there's nothing lost by being generous. The amount of face gained from such an exercise would be off the scale - 'a ticket to ride', some might say.

Edited June 8, 2014 by somchaismith

[somchaismith]

There's also everything right with hiring dancers - http://multimedia.asiaone.com/static/multimedia/gallery/121019_dancer/

[petejjj]

Many thanks for sharing all this info and pics Thaddeus much appreciated

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[David48]

Have you been involved with a novice Monk preparation?

.

I have.......

01.JPG02.JPG03.JPG

04.JPG05.JPG06.JPG

07.JPG08.JPG09.JPG

This was my Brother-in-Law.

The in-laws told me that even though I had married into the family I was neither parent, blood, Thai or Buddhist and I was not expected to make a contribution unless I really wanted to.

I changed a thousand Baht note in to 1 Baht coins and wrapped them in gold coloured foil paper myself, took hours, on the condition that I got to sit in the truck and throw them.

Tables were set up for family, family members who had moved away, and the people of the village.There were around 250 people.

There was no sound stage and no dancing girls. That is for weddings, not funerals and monkings.

This one I helped with, but I have attended countless others as a guest, and they have all followed the same criteria.

The total cost for this one was around 15K Baht, that was around 9 years ago, so I expect inflation will have had an effect on that number.

Ex-pointy one ... I have to say, I can't remember reading a post recently that I've enjoyed more ...

Thanks for sharing that experience.

OH ... MissFarmGirl's sister and mother think that you are a hunsom man indeed ...

.

[David48]

^^ PS ... you didn't say how much that one cost?

Did the Family let on?

[Isaanfreak]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

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[Costas2008]

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Agreeing in part ...

"100,000 baht for a party for an eleven day monk? Seriously - have a good talk to your wife about that. Not a coin. She's taking the p*ss out of you. Big time."

My gf's nephew did exacty that.

There was a procession etc, the baht coin toss ... all true.

But Bt 100,000 is simply face.

There is an expectation to provide some sort of celebration and a food/drink reward for the procession ... but Bt 100,000 ... alt=facepalm.gif>

David,

Don't forget the OP, is speaking about an 11 day celebration.

Feeding and entertaining all people for 11 days..............

This is the full monty........can cost a lot.

In brief discussions with family I was told that the following happens:

2. day 1 prepare for party etc, buy monk robe etc.
4. day 2 go to wat and do the monk thing, i.e. shave head etc
6. night 2 party with food, drinks, dancing girls and band.
8. day 11 last day when step son is released, we provide him with new set of clothes

Party - food etc is only first 2 days to my knowledge?

Event still evolving.

Thanks

-P

costa ... no 11 day party mentioned.;b++){var>

Have you been involved with a novice Monk preparation?

.

A few of them, David.

Where I live in Isaan, can go on for a week.

[Thaddeus]

^^ PS ... you didn't say how much that one cost?

Did the Family let on?

Did mate, right at the end, about 15K Baht, even with inflation nine years later, I expect that it would still be under 30k.

Btw, your in-laws have very good taste

P.S. don't tell them I told you, but with the money from guests in envelopes, they made a profit

Edited June 8, 2014 by Thaddeus

[JAS21]

In brief discussions with family I was told that the following happens:

• day 1 prepare for party etc, buy monk robe etc.
• day 2 go to wat and do the monk thing, i.e. shave head etc
• night 2 party with food, drinks, dancing girls and band.
• day 11 last day when step son is released, we provide him with new set of clothes

Party - food etc is only first 2 days to my knowledge?

Event still evolving.

Thanks

-P

Well we just went to one yesterday. My wife's cousins son who we know quite well. I don't know the cost and it's not the thing to ask. We only went on Day 2. There was lunch, for about 100 people and in the evening there must have been 4-5 hundred people ... judging by the number of tables and 10 to each table.

The format above is about correct. My wife gave 1000Baht to his parents, in an envelope and I gave 500Baht to him when I had to sit in a chair along with three others and he said something in Thai.

The food should not be a lot, a couple of different curries and rice. But some beer and some of the cheap (paint stripper whisky), soft drinks and water will cost a little more. Also a tub of Ice cream

12000Baht for a band etc seems a piss take in a little village. I assume that a covered area with lighting (don't touch the wires!!)will also be provided.

You probably aren't likely to get a lot back if they think a foreigner is paying!! Make sure that you do get back what is gifted though!!

Best get a complete breakdown. Also see what the family can help with, maybe the food/cooking etc.

Doing the 11Day or whatever Monk Thing is A BIG THING in Thai custom ....... Good Luck

Edited June 8, 2014 by JAS21

[krisb]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

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Woot!!

For that much he can move to a Bavarian Monastry and learn to make this as well

[krisb]

^^ PS ... you didn't say how much that one cost?

Did the Family let on?

Did mate, right at the end, about 15K Baht, even with inflation nine years later, I expect that it would still be under 30k.

Btw, your in-laws have very good taste

P.S. don't tell them I told you, but with the money from guests in envelopes, they made a profit

See.

The whole countries one big business.

As me old mate use to say...

Just sayn'

[Isaanfreak]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

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Woot!!

For that much he can move to a Bavarian Monastry and learn to make this as well

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

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[David48]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

Mate, I am just ...

Just confirming ... for a Novice Monk into the order for a couple of weeks there was a function for 800 ?

Not disputing ... just trying to clarify.

Thanks

[krisb]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

Mate, I am just ...

Just confirming ... for a Novice Monk into the order for a couple of weeks there was a function for 800 ?

Not disputing ... just trying to clarify.

Thanks

He had a lot of Facebook friends.

Got pics of the 800 guests?

Was the Kardashians there?

Edited June 8, 2014 by krisb

[seajae]

actually went to one today, there were about 100 people, no alcohol, water, coke, pepsi etc to drink, Food on each table consisted of boiled rice, a soup, a curry, fish, pork(knuckle and trotter), prawn dish, snacks then a desert dish. After eating they had a band that played local music and led the procession in which we were expected to dance(wave our arms/hands around) while going around the temple 3 times and then they did the coin toss then the ceremony inside the temple. Food is basic which is the same at most of these ceremonies I have been too, up country it should not be overly expensive and my wife says maybe 40,000 baht for everything all up plus everyone usually gives the paying parent an enverlope with money in it to help pay so make sure no one else pockets this money, its yours. The monk that does the ceremony is paid a nominal fee as well as for the use of the temple, you should buy all the things for the monk to use while there for his 11 days. It is entirely up to you what you pay but you need to set a limit and make sure the money inside the envelopes is given to you and not pocketed by the inlaws. The ceremony takes place all on the one day, well it has been to the several we have attended but some families like to make it a big thing especially if they have a farang to sucker into paying, same with all the extras, no dancing girls at any I have been too and there have been some by very rich influential people, these were usually done with just the basics too. If your wife and her family want a big one tell them to pay for it, set your limit and tell her you expect all the donations given to you to compensate for the costs or it will simply dissapear and dont let them bullsh*t that it is for the son, it isnt.

[BookMan]

Many thanks krisb. My wife is suggesting around THB100k which I think is excess.

Band with dancing girls is approx THB12k.

I recall from our wedding there in 2009, it cost about THB40k for the party, and another THB40k for sin sod.

Many thanks

-Pete

I can see how it could easily go to 100K OP. Remember though, that a lot of this cost will be recouped through the donations guests will make when they visit during the celebrations. The actual cost after envelope donation recoupment could be close to break even...or maybe half the gross cost.

For my experience, I attended one such party for my GF's brother over Songkran this year and asked about most of the of the processes in and around the event.

There is a lot of face involved in all of it and this extends to many areas. In the village I went to there were 3 monk parties at the same time, so there would have been some undercurrent of competition just with that .

The biggest expense by far was food & beverage. I went with the family on many shopping trips and the food, beer, whiskey, soft drink etc quickly adds up when you are feeding 300-500 people over the course of 2 and a half days. Many people eat several times and each guest is given food/drink to take home. We had to do 2 extra makro trips and one extra market trip as the food and drink ran out. The family don't drink much alcohol and I wouldn't have considered the alcohol purchases to be extravagant for the guest numbers. Bottom line. It adds up.

All the tables and tents and cooking gear was from the local temple, free, but a donation was given. 5 of the 7 pigs slaughtered were bought as piglets and raised on the farm. The fish were drained from the grandmothers fish pond. All the preparation of food was done by a rotating unstructured roster of family and local villagers. All that was free. Setting up the tents and tables and getting all the gear from the temple was free. Some beers for the workers. Trucks and tractors were borrowed

The coins that are wrapped in foil and thrown can be done as 1 baht pieces, but it might be luckier or better merit for the family if they are 5 baht or 10 baht pieces..Indeed a mix of all. The family i was with had thousands of these foil flowers made up. Mostly the coins were donated by extended family and wrapped up by other people, so the actual expense there was fairly low

There was the hire of a very Loud Speaker Truck for the walk around the village and the walk to the temple the following day. A family pick up truck was decorated to carry the BIL.

There seemed to be quite a bit of money spent on making merit in various ways. There were donations to the temple for using their tents/cooking gear/tables/etcetera, donations for monks for the hair cutting ceremony, an early morning ceremony, a night time ceremony (up to 8 monks attending). Further donations to the temple to help with the stay of the BIL. More money for the money tree for a later ceremony at the temple. This was very competitive in some ways and a major face issue.

Other expenses included a couple of truck loads of dirt to level an area, hiring extra water storage containers, hiring ice chests, hiring a sound system and lights and speakers. There were lots of small expenses like these, but they all add up.

[Isaanfreak]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

Mate, I am just ...

Just confirming ... for a Novice Monk into the order for a couple of weeks there was a function for 800 ?

Not disputing ... just trying to clarify.

Thanks

Yes my wife invited a bit more than 800 people. Of course they didn't come at once. Some came Friday some Saturday, Sunday morning... But we didn't sleep much,get up at 3 a.m, fell in the bed at 11p.m and this for 3 nights. Koen was 30 days in the Wat.

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[Isaanfreak]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

Mate, I am just ...

Just confirming ... for a Novice Monk into the order for a couple of weeks there was a function for 800 ?

Not disputing ... just trying to clarify.

Thanks

He had a lot of Facebook friends.

Got pics of the 800 guests?

Was the Kardashians there?

Yeah I got a lot of photos but for some reason I couldn't upload them. And thanks god the Kardashians did not come. They were invited though./now I got it./

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[krisb]

My wife payed 200 000B. No alcoholic beverages.

Well she said better if the guests are not drinking alcohol, might they go "crazy". Btw 800 people donated 87 000 B.

Mate, I am just ...

Just confirming ... for a Novice Monk into the order for a couple of weeks there was a function for 800 ?

Not disputing ... just trying to clarify.

Thanks

Yes my wife invited a bit more than 800 people. Of course they didn't come at once. Some came Friday some Saturday, Sunday morning... But we didn't sleep much,get up at 3 a.m, fell in the bed at 11p.m and this for 3 nights. Koen was 30 days in the Wat.

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800 guests

30 days in the temple

200k

My mind boggles at all that.

Crazy stuff, yet awesome.

[David48]

Well gentlemen ... I've been educated. I thought I had a reasonable grasp on the ins and outs of Thailand ... but you have shown me something new.

My experience was a much lower key affair ... but we aren't Isaan folk.

[krisb]

Well gentlemen ... I've been educated. I thought I had a reasonable grasp on the ins and outs of Thailand ... but you have shown me something new.

My experience was a much lower key affair ... but we aren't Isaan folk.

I thought I was David.

Nope. Not even close it seems.