how to deal with a long distance relationship ?

[matty30]

Long distance relationships are hard as <deleted>. I’m sorry, but they are. Yeah, there are some pretty great things about them – unlimited alone time, not having to fight for space, being able to go out with your friends all the time without anyone getting upset — but on the whole, being thousands of miles apart kind of blows. And whether you feel like acknowledging it or not, distance has a definite impact on the dynamics of a relationship.

I would like to know Long Distance Relationship Problems And How you guys Deal With Them ?

[Tywais]

Not Chiang Mai specific so moved to General.

[Sayonarax]

Visited as often as possible.

[Datebayo]

I got one important advice for ya. The next time you meet your gf again, be sure to let her do a STD test before you jump on her.

[MonkeyLoo]

Its not easy, but easier than it was a while back.

Skype, web cams and cheap calls etc.

Sent from my GT-N7100 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[SDM0712]

Unless the end plan is for one to move to the other's country I think long distance relationships are pointless. They are full of worry, doubt, upset and tears at the airport everytime you have to say goodbye. The world is a small place now, technology and the interweb are fantastic things in business, but for a personal relationship just show you what and who you are missing.

S

Edited June 8, 2014 by SDM0712

[icare999]

they work less than 1% of time

[David48]

they work less than 1% of time

Let me provide that 1% of hope.

Works for us.

Surely I can't be one of few, there maybe more.

With regards to our relationship, three things stand out.

• We would be a couple in the West, we are in the East.

• We are best friends, and that's an excellent base for a relationship.

• Her Family and Friends accept me and my Family and Friends accept her.

Good luck ...

.

[Nautilus05]

I bet she finds it easier than you do.

She'll never tell you that though...

[David48]

I bet she finds it easier than you do.

She'll never tell you that though...

Humm ...

Actually, we recently had TWINS and I can guarantee you that she finds it a lot harder then I do.

Just a general tip ... don't presume that everyone's relationship is the same as your past or present one.

Nautilus05 ... if you knew me or met us, as many on the Forum have, you would have not made that comment.

That said ... I'm always happy to shout a beer and meet a member here who I've not had the pleasure of before.

[JLCrab]

So have you tweeted the Pope? -- maybe he hasn't yet heard about the TWINS! and would give his blessings. @pontifex

https://twitter.com/Pontifex

Edited June 8, 2014 by JLCrab

[mesquite]

I know a few women here in Thailand who carry on several long distance relationships with no problem. Works for them.

[rhythmworx]

Best way to deal with it is not to start one in the 1st place.

If you want a relationship make sure you can live there.

[e2x10]

move

[akirasan]

You have my sympathy Matty. It is very hard. To give you some hope, my girlfriend and I also made it work. However I'm in the last few months of saving money to move there and get married. I found it easier if I kept myself busy in my free time, mostly with exercise and I did buy my girlfriend a new phone so we could use Line to video call and keep in touch.

As far as problems? Well we never really had any.

[rhythmworx]

...yet.

[Beetlejuice]

I know a few women here in Thailand who carry on several long distance relationships with no problem. Works for them.

Especially when the long distance mugs, believing they are their one and only, are sending them money every month.

Many of these long distance guys are only long distance guys because they are not established in their lives enough to live in Thailand or able to bring their new found love of their lives over to their own countries and in most cases these so-called long distance romances just fizzle out after the girls begin to realise that they are hanging on a hope for something that`s never going to happen.

[Berkshire]

I bet she finds it easier than you do.

She'll never tell you that though...

No doubt. And if he cannot reach her by telephone, it really is because she didn't hear it ringing...or phone no good....or charging battery....or dropped telephone, no work...or....

[longstebe]

Didn't take long before the usual bell ends come out and say your birds shagging around (in other words).

Our relationship has been working for about 5 years, yes of course you have your moments but in general its been good. We've been married for 9 years, lived in the states together for about 3 of those years. Like another poster mentioned, visit as often as possible, spend your time together like its your last (bit soppy but you get the message) and plenty of sex :-). Also, my missus works which is a big help.

I'm a contractor so it works pretty well for me, I'm fortunate enough to be able to pick and choose my jobs but on the other hand I must work to keep bringing the money in.

Good luck mate. It can work but both need to be on the same page

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[AnotherOneAmerican]

@OP

Are you sending her money?

Does she ask for money?

What is her employment?

Have you seen her at her place of work?

Does she have unlimited time off when you are visiting?

Without answers to these important questions, we can't really advise you.

Edited June 9, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[Candyflip]

From my point of view as an independent woman, long distance relationship could be very hard.

I dated someone for 3 years . My love one had to move to South Africa for work. I couldnt convince the long distance would work.

I couldnt take off with him either coz it happened while my dream career, which i tried to pursue for 8 years had just started taking off.

To give up my life as independent to depend on a man , even for awhile, I just coundnt see myself doing it.

Perhaps I am just too comfortable where I am and had enough of moving overseas.

............

Do you see yourself being with her for very long time? Is she willing to relocate? Are you willing to relocate and take a new challenge as you are in love with someone? That sort of questions you need to think and discuss. In the meantime, Skype, FaceTime, visit, make her feels that you are longing to see her and spend time with her again.

Good luck na

[choochoo]

I got one important advice for ya. The next time you meet your gf again, be sure to let her do a STD test before you jump on her.

Such cynicism . Its like yall think his gf is a bargirl...................lol.

Chances are she is by the way..............lol.

[HeavyDrinker]

For a while, early in our relationship, the only contact we had was the weekly letter plopping on the doormat plus the odd hurried (very costly) phone call.

In this modern age when I can contact colleagues in HD quality video across the globe without leaving bed, plus keep up with pals thousands of miles away, not to mention some very inexpensive phone call options these days being able to maintain a long distance relationship should be a cakewalk, with no excuse for failure.

[snottgoblin]

I think there will be a number of people who have had long distance relationships that have worked, not all women are out shagging around, or working 3 or 4 blokes at the same time asking to have money sent.

I guess the question would be, where did the OP meet said lady? Does she have a job? Is he sending money?

[choochoo]

I think there will be a number of people who have had long distance relationships that have worked, not all women are out shagging around, or working 3 or 4 blokes at the same time asking to have money sent.

I guess the question would be, where did the OP meet said lady? Does she have a job? Is he sending money?

ive seen girls show their boobies in cafes to their bf while asking for account numbers from their other bf......lol. Do you want to be one of these?

[WarProfiteer]

The bitterness here is amazing... should probably be expected though.

Use the constructive advice ya get, throw out the rest.

Best advice I have to make sure she isnt just sitting around all day. Either she works or she goes to school or both. Idle hands and all that jazz. Best if she can work on improving herself (her english, her education or advancing professionally) while you're away.

I have friends that make it work. I have other friends who got burned trying it. In the end, each case is unique. All you can do is put in your best effort to make it succeed and let chips fall where they may.

[flyingdoc]

Every relationship is entirely different.

A long distance one CAN work, but it is much harder.

Having common interests and both working does make things a little easier, but trust is perhaps the overriding factor in all this. Being able to actually talk to each other in a mature way, not only helps, but is essential!

[kjhbigv]

What is the point of having a relationship when you only see each other couple of months a year?

Seems a bit pointless.

Sent from my GT-I9300T using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[JLCrab]

The bitterness here is amazing... should probably be expected though.

Use the constructive advice ya get, throw out the rest.

Best advice I have to make sure she isnt just sitting around all day. Either she works or she goes to school or both. Idle hands and all that jazz. Best if she can work on improving herself (her english, her education or advancing professionally) while you're away.

I have friends that make it work. I have other friends who got burned trying it. In the end, each case is unique. All you can do is put in your best effort to make it succeed and let chips fall where they may.

She works. I sit around all day.

[snottgoblin]

I think there will be a number of people who have had long distance relationships that have worked, not all women are out shagging around, or working 3 or 4 blokes at the same time asking to have money sent.

I guess the question would be, where did the OP meet said lady? Does she have a job? Is he sending money?

ive seen girls show their boobies in cafes to their bf while asking for account numbers from their other bf......lol. Do you want to be one of these?

I wouldn't want to be one of those, and I am not, as I actually live in Thailand, unlike some of the fantasists and assorted bell ends that frequent this forum