Do you trust ? have you changed ?

[thailiketoo]

Yes.

You wrote in another thread, "So do you know anyone who has lost the plot?"

Now I can answer. You.

I came here first in my 20's; I'm now close to 70. Either I've done quite well or I have a whole lot of money. In either case you are wrong.

Thais give respect to people who deserve it. I get it. You don't. OK. I'm not calling you a liar. I agree you don't get respect and you should not trust Thais. I've trusted Thais with my life on numerous occasions with no problems. If I was you I wouldn't.

You forgot the 3rd option, you have nothing worth taking.

You are confusing several entirely different trust issues in your post, for example.

Do I trust my gf not to kill me? yes? it's not in her interest, but she is certainly capable of murder.

Do I trust my gf not to steal from me? no, but I can limit her access to my wallet. She is certainly capable of stealing.

Do I trust my gf not to betray me with another man? why would I care?

No I'm not. I'm not confusing anything. My wife took care of me and all of my assets while I was unconscious in a hospital bed. She had access to all of my assets and paid all of my bills. You should not assume things about me that you don't know. My wife could have let me die and taken all of my money and she didn't. Her short term gains might have been better than the long term prospects.

[Rimmer]

One off topic copyrighted post in weird fonts removed

[smotherb]

Just saw on TV an old southern US saying I have not heard for years, "Yankees is like hemorrhoids, if they come down and go back up, no problem, but if they come down and stay, they are a pain in the ass" I'll wager that pretty much sums up the Thias' opinion of falangs--so you might rethink

[GOLDBUGGY]

I trust people less here than I do back home. Short Changing seems to be common here. Even at banks although less often. I think it has more to do with a greater need for money and that people don't see this as serious as we do back home. Almost a laughable mistake when they get caught. So I count my change more here then anywhere else. I am also very carful and avoid using my Credit Card here.

Another common trick is to short you on your drink in just about any bar. Especially after the first 2 and if you are not watching. Odd that they seem to be over honest when it comes to the check bin though. But if you stick to beer you should be okay.

I don\t trust Real Estate Agents or Rental Property Owners here either. Or for that matter any salesmen of any kind. Unless they own the store. Many Land Lords tend to think your deposit is a bonus to them. There are many others things here as well which we all know, but if you are careful things go okay. Just don't give anyone the opportunity to cheat you. .

[PaullyW]

I'm inclined to trust them Charlie, it is my opinion that the vast majority of Thais are decent and honest people. I could write a book about the honesty and helpfulness I have received from Thai people.

Nice to hear that. I can only say exactly the opposite. (I am saying this as I speak, read and write Thai) Of course I have come across a couple decent people, but not too many.

In general, Thais tend to palter. One thing I have learnt here that they never tell the truth. Not even to their closest relatives.

I find it funny when foreigners call their Thai acquaintences friends. Their way of living or culture doesn't require the sort of friends we got used to in western countries. Soul mates and confidants are rarities here.

When I first started coming here 15 years ago, I would have agreed with possum. Now that I've lived here 10+ years, I agree with garrya. I can't get a straight answer out of Thais, and it's a waste of time asking them a question because they will lie, or make something up if they don't know, which is also lying. Where they really screw me up now is on the rare occasions they tell the truth.

I, too, have noticed what Thais call friends are what I call acquaintances. Not only do they lie to their closest relatives, they also steal from them as well. I get along well with them as long as I keep them emotionally distant, and pretend to believe them. Their lying reminds me of the type of thing very young children do in the US.

In my case I can speak some Thai, but understand a lot more, more than they think, and it was being present during conversations with my ex and her friends that I realized I had made a mistake getting deeply involved emotionally with her. I did get out with only minimal financial damage, but the next serious gf, if there is one, well, I will definitely do things differently. Like set up very clear rules early on, and let her know that I will drop her like a hot rock if she violates them, and then follow through if she does.

To answer the OP's questions in the topic title, yes I have changed and I trust them as far as I can throw them.

Beautiful post. I am exactly the same way. They don't even trust each other, so I'm not sure why we would. I suspect some of the overly trusting farangs here are quite on in years and just don't read things well or just don't care!

[NoshowJones]

I'm inclined to trust them Charlie, it is my opinion that the vast majority of Thais are decent and honest people. I could write a book about the honesty and helpfulness I have received from Thai people.

Nice to hear that. I can only say exactly the opposite. (I am saying this as I speak, read and write Thai) Of course I have come across a couple decent people, but not too many.

In general, Thais tend to palter. One thing I have learnt here that they never tell the truth. Not even to their closest relatives.

I find it funny when foreigners call their Thai acquaintences friends. Their way of living or culture doesn't require the sort of friends we got used to in western countries. Soul mates and confidants are rarities here.

When I first started coming here 15 years ago, I would have agreed with possum. Now that I've lived here 10+ years, I agree with garrya. I can't get a straight answer out of Thais, and it's a waste of time asking them a question because they will lie, or make something up if they don't know, which is also lying. Where they really screw me up now is on the rare occasions they tell the truth.

I, too, have noticed what Thais call friends are what I call acquaintances. Not only do they lie to their closest relatives, they also steal from them as well. I get along well with them as long as I keep them emotionally distant, and pretend to believe them. Their lying reminds me of the type of thing very young children do in the US.

In my case I can speak some Thai, but understand a lot more, more than they think, and it was being present during conversations with my ex and her friends that I realized I had made a mistake getting deeply involved emotionally with her. I did get out with only minimal financial damage, but the next serious gf, if there is one, well, I will definitely do things differently. Like set up very clear rules early on, and let her know that I will drop her like a hot rock if she violates them, and then follow through if she does.

To answer the OP's questions in the topic title, yes I have changed and I trust them as far as I can throw them.

Beautiful post. I am exactly the same way. They don't even trust each other, so I'm not sure why we would. I suspect some of the overly trusting farangs here are quite on in years and just don't read things well or just don't care!

Or it could be that they have been with the same Thai lady for years, seen what their family is like, and their familys friends all living in the same small village happily together, the people who come to your house to do the odd repair or install something, build an extension to your house and then hand you back 2000 baht which they mistaking charged extra for, coming out a few Kilos to fix your car which had an LPG problem, taking you to their premises and fixing it, then only charging you 300 Baht. I could go on, but 95% of the time. all I have had is honesty.

Yes, I could also point to some negatives, but the postives far outweigh them, but as I have said before, it could be that living and doing most of your business up in the boonies could have something to do with it.

[thailiketoo]

Beautiful post. I am exactly the same way. They don't even trust each other, so I'm not sure why we would. I suspect some of the overly trusting farangs here are quite on in years and just don't read things well or just don't care!

Maybe some of the old guys knew some fellows from the 1st Company, Royal Thailand Army Volunteer Regiment.

[PaullyW]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

[CharlieH]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

Yes, I think its fair to say that the opinions and encounters of those living in the rural areas will be vastly different to those living in the main tourist areas or cities such as Bangkok and Pattaya etc.

[thailiketoo]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

[PaullyW]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

Perhaps. We all have different experiences. But, logically speaking, I'm not sure I'd apply the same expectations of trust to allied soldiers and the general public. Your alliance with those soldiers was bourne out of a very real need on both sides.

[thailiketoo]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

Perhaps. We all have different experiences. But, logically speaking, I'm not sure I'd apply the same expectations of trust to allied soldiers and the general public. Your alliance with those soldiers was bourne out of a very real need on both sides.

Do you ever watch the, "Dog Whisperer?" Thai soldiers were Thai people before soldiers. People and dogs both know if you like and respect them. I have a Thai dog. I lead the dog follows. I say stop the dog stops. If the dog gets a thorn in her paw she comes to me to remove it. I find Thai dogs the same as Western dogs. I found Thai soldiers to be the same as Western soldiers. I expected the best and that's what I got most of the time. Expect the worst and that is what you will get most of the time.

[PaullyW]

I suspect the guys who work here in competitive positions or industries will generally have different opinions than those of the up country pensioners.

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

Perhaps. We all have different experiences. But, logically speaking, I'm not sure I'd apply the same expectations of trust to allied soldiers and the general public. Your alliance with those soldiers was bourne out of a very real need on both sides.

Do you ever watch the, "Dog Whisperer?" Thai soldiers were Thai people before soldiers. People and dogs both know if you like and respect them. I have a Thai dog. I lead the dog follows. I say stop the dog stops. If the dog gets a thorn in her paw she comes to me to remove it. I find Thai dogs the same as Western dogs. I found Thai soldiers to be the same as Western soldiers. I expected the best and that's what I got most of the time. Expect the worst and that is what you will get most of the time.

False analogy. I am not debating the ability of Thais to be honest and trustworthy. I am debating their tendency to be and their motivations when they are and aren't.

[thailiketoo]

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

Perhaps. We all have different experiences. But, logically speaking, I'm not sure I'd apply the same expectations of trust to allied soldiers and the general public. Your alliance with those soldiers was bourne out of a very real need on both sides.

Do you ever watch the, "Dog Whisperer?" Thai soldiers were Thai people before soldiers. People and dogs both know if you like and respect them. I have a Thai dog. I lead the dog follows. I say stop the dog stops. If the dog gets a thorn in her paw she comes to me to remove it. I find Thai dogs the same as Western dogs. I found Thai soldiers to be the same as Western soldiers. I expected the best and that's what I got most of the time. Expect the worst and that is what you will get most of the time.

False analogy. I am not debating the ability of Thais to be honest and trustworthy. I am debating their tendency to be and their motivations when they are and aren't.

You wrote, "Beautiful post. I am exactly the same way. They don't even trust each other, so I'm not sure why we would." That means you think Thais are not trustworthy.

[PaullyW]

Or old veterans who fought a war with Thai troops and depended on them in life and death situations daily.

Perhaps. We all have different experiences. But, logically speaking, I'm not sure I'd apply the same expectations of trust to allied soldiers and the general public. Your alliance with those soldiers was bourne out of a very real need on both sides.

Do you ever watch the, "Dog Whisperer?" Thai soldiers were Thai people before soldiers. People and dogs both know if you like and respect them. I have a Thai dog. I lead the dog follows. I say stop the dog stops. If the dog gets a thorn in her paw she comes to me to remove it. I find Thai dogs the same as Western dogs. I found Thai soldiers to be the same as Western soldiers. I expected the best and that's what I got most of the time. Expect the worst and that is what you will get most of the time.

False analogy. I am not debating the ability of Thais to be honest and trustworthy. I am debating their tendency to be and their motivations when they are and aren't.

You wrote, "Beautiful post. I am exactly the same way. They don't even trust each other, so I'm not sure why we would." That means you think Thais are not trustworthy.

Yes.

I think you do not follow. Nothing I said is contradictory.

[thailiketoo]

PaullyW, I didn't say, you said anything contradictory. I think you are a self fulfilling prophecy. You don't trust Thais and they act untrustworthy towards you. I trust Thais so they are worthy of trust for me.

[kandi]

I stopped caring about getting stung for pitiful sums of money from shops, taxis etc a long time ago. For me the thought that if they need it so much, then I'm not going to let my day be ruined for few baht.

Same here, it really does not matter if you have paid a bit more for a taxi or some late night noodle soup- there really is more to life.

I hate the tourists on the beach hammering down the price of some sunglasses or whatever for half an hour- the guy selling them has to eat or feed his family.

I would be careful when dealing with some of the major hospitals, they do seem a bit gung ho with reccomending surgery ( not my experience but from a friend who was told he needed a 400 000 baht back operation )

I don't see it that way at all. Ripping somebody off is just disrespectful in my eyes. And if I give in, I not only feel stupid after that, I've also given him the proof that he has success with that.

It doesn't matter what the price is. If I buy a can of coke (~14 Baht) from the street and the lady tells me it costs 30 Baht, I don't buy it. It's only 15 Baht or so, but why should I pay more than any other person? I've been living here for a few years, I pay taxes and I speak, read and write Thai. I don't want any special treatment, I just want to be treated as anybody else. But in this case I smile, say thank you and go to the next who usually has normal prices.

And the argument that "they have a family to feed" is complete bullshit. I've never seen a Thai who rips someone off just to make his little children a present. It's just plain greed.

[ggt]

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I trust people less here than I do back home. Short Changing seems to be common here. Even at banks although less often. I think it has more to do with a greater need for money and that people don't see this as serious as we do back home. Almost a laughable mistake when they get caught. So I count my change more here then anywhere else. I am also very carful and avoid using my Credit Card here.

Another common trick is to short you on your drink in just about any bar. Especially after the first 2 and if you are not watching. Odd that they seem to be over honest when it comes to the check bin though. But if you stick to beer you should be okay.

I don\t trust Real Estate Agents or Rental Property Owners here either. Or for that matter any salesmen of any kind. Unless they own the store. Many Land Lords tend to think your deposit is a bonus to them. There are many others things here as well which we all know, but if you are careful things go okay. Just don't give anyone the opportunity to cheat you. .

I never knowingly gave anyone the opportunity to cheat me...I was always on-guard for corruption...however...the Thais experience at cheating foreigners...far exceeded my knowledge of how to detect their subtle thievery...lost baht to corrupt business practices...more times than I can count...bitter...no...is this a rant...no...just telling it like it is...