An amusing Thainess moment, got any?

[ppmacready]

A few years ago I was having lunch at the yacht club in Pattaya.

I ordered fillet steak with chips and vegetables.

Some time later they brought me spaghetti bolognese!

My least favourite food.

Having been in the London Fire Brigade, I'd had it all to many nights for dinner.

Alacarte, Italian, roasted, each and every way I'd had it and just can't stomach it any more of it.

''I didn't order that''. I quietly said, slightly bemused.

''Ill go and see the chef sir.''

She came back all smiles.

''Yes you did order that sir.''

''No, you don't understand, I surely didn't!

I hate spaghetti bolognese!

Please get the menu and order.''

I showed her that on the menu was number 119 Fillet steak and she had written that number down.

''I'm sorry sir ill go back and see the chef again.''

She came back all smiles.

''Its OK sir, all understandable, we didn't have fillet steak so the chef decided to give you the next best thing, that being on the menu, number 120 spaghetti bolognese!''

''Well can you switch that to the next best thing the other way,118 fish and chips please''?

Which she happily complied with.

[CharlieH]

Had something similar happen to me, but they also tried charging me for BOTH dishes!

[ppmacready]

I ordered fried chicken with garlic on a beach in Koh Chang.

In both Thai and English.

The lady brought me a green chicken curry.

I explained to her I don't eat curry and ordered chicken with garlic.

''That is fried chicken with garlic'' she sneered.

I showed her the menu which also had photos.

In front of me was a bowl of green curry.

I asked the lady to point to the photos on the menu of what I had in front of me and she pointed to a plate of fried chicken with garlic.

I couldn't stop my self laughing!

After that she would not serve me.

But didn't charge me for the food.

[Daffy D]

Couldn't have been much of a chef if he thought spaghetti Bolognese! was the next best thing to fillet steak with chips and vegetables

[apetley]

Stopped at a roadside stall with wifey for some fried banana.

How much? she asked

7 pieces for 20 bht

Ok says wifey

Vendor says 40 bht please

You said 20 bht says wifey

Minimum order is 14 pieces says vendor

No thanks says wifey

[h90]

Couldn't have been much of a chef if he thought spaghetti Bolognese! was the next best thing to fillet steak with chips and vegetables

same same Farang food

[Clutch]

Years ago a friend ordered breakfast, 1 omelet and 2 pieces of toast. 10 minutes later he gets served, 1 Amarit (beer) and 2 pieces of toast.

[CharlieH]

To shopkeeper " I bought this an hour ago and it doesnt work" reply " Very sorry, you want buy another one?"

[krisb]

Years ago a friend ordered breakfast, 1 omelet and 2 pieces of toast. 10 minutes later he gets served, 1 Amarit (beer) and 2 pieces of toast.

I'd accept that.

[EBlair48]

I think an ability to view utterly vain stupidity with a reluctance to offer decent and responsible service as " amusing" is a prerequisite for residing happily in Thailand.

I find it annoying.

[krisb]

3 of us mates staying on Samui in a really nice resort drinking a few beers in 1 of the rooms got the beer munchies and ordered spring rolls off the room service menu.

'How many spring rolls on a plate please'? I ask...4 sir.

'Ok, can I get 12 spring rolls please"...yes sir.

30 minutes goes by, we start thinking they must be making the pastry also, then a knock at the door.

At the door is 2 waiters and 2 tables with 12 plates of spring rolls... a total of 48 spring rolls!

I didn't complain to the staff, English isn't their first language, Thais not mine.

[CharlieH]

3 of us mates staying on Samui in a really nice resort drinking a few beers in 1 of the rooms got the beer munchies and ordered spring rolls off the room service menu.

'How many spring rolls on a plate please'? I ask...4 sir.

'Ok, can I get 12 spring rolls please"...yes sir.

30 minutes goes by, we start thinking they must be making the pastry also, then a knock at the door.

At the door is 2 waiters and 2 tables with 12 plates of spring rolls... a total of 48 spring rolls!

I didn't complain to the staff, English isn't their first language, Thais not mine.

Did they misunderstand or just take advantage of the chance to sell/charge more ? Thats the question

[krisb]

Surely a misunderstanding.

Who seriously orders that many spring rolls. Then again why wouldn't they question that amount?

I ate them cold for 2 days btw out of the mini bar fridge. No way I was gonna bin them.

[ppmacready]

I think an ability to view utterly vain stupidity with a reluctance to offer decent and responsible service as " amusing" is a prerequisite for residing happily in Thailand.

I find it annoying.

I agree, having a very good sense of humour is a must to enjoy life in Thailand.

You just can't sweat the small stuff.

A few weeks ago I went to my local restaurant and ordered breakfast No1, eggs any style they can manage and a cup of tea.

Ive been ordering the same breakfast for 8 years there.

The bosses wife took the order and gave me mixed vegetables with chicken.

It made a pleasant change!

[marko kok prong]

Year's ago [1989],I ordered a cheeseburger,it was presented with cheese and an egg,but no meat ,i sent it back,only for them to bring a cheese burger with no egg and no meat,i asked again ,they brought it back again with the egg,i finally realised,back then a cheeseburger was a glorified cheese roll,with egg,i left unsatisfied,and with the staff bewildered,what did the falang want,it was a dark and rainy night,and on finally getting back to our accomodation,i was looking forward to the twix bar, i had saved only to find it had be consumed by jungle rodents,dissapointed i consoled myself by giving my English girlfriend a good xxxxxx,before falling into an uneasy and food haunted sleep,as the rain cascaded down outside.

Edited June 25, 2014 by Rooo
profanity

[enyaw]

Orderd chops, sauteed potatoes, fried veg served with gravy one time and it did arrive but no chops. Apparently the chops were as pointed out to me by the waiter with a chopping motion of his hands indeed refered to the chopped onion gravy.

Edited June 22, 2014 by enyaw

[Seastallion]

I bought a new laptop last week. Browsed around in Vichusin for about an hour. I was the only customer in there, about 7 staff on the floor all engrossed in their web-surfing. I finally made my selection, and appealed for some help. A few language difficulties, but all sorted. Yep, I'll buy this one. Go and do the rigamarole at the cashier, with the sales guy still with me, when I remembered I want a mouse because wifey dislikes the pad. Chose a mouse, and completed the purchase (credit card, no refunds), whereupon they presented me with the free mouse that comes with the laptop. It was not an afterthought because the sales guy had placed the package of the free mouse beside the laptop and the mouse I had chosen to buy.

Well, he got an extra 290 baht sale, and I got a spare mouse.

[Crossy]

I agree, having a very good sense of humour is a must to enjoy life in Thailand.

You just can't sweat the small stuff.

A few weeks ago I went to my local restaurant and ordered breakfast No1, eggs any style they can manage and a cup of tea.

Ive been ordering the same breakfast for 8 years there.

The bosses wife took the order and gave me mixed vegetables with chicken.

It made a pleasant change!

The eggs were 'hatched' what's the problem?

Did you get the tea?

[geronimo]

I have hundreds of these kind of experiences .......

When I first arrived here (eons ago) I was having lunch in a department store in the Banglampoo area when these three uni girls came over and asked me, in reasonable English, if I would agree to be interviewed by them. I hastily nodded as it's not everyday that 3 stunning girls want to sit and chat with me. So the interview over,one of them produces a small bouquet of flowers and graciously hands it to me which I accepted and they went on their way. After a while I decide to leave the place and was walking down from the 5th floor to the Ground when I realised I had this bunch of flowers in my hand. So being a bit of a joker, I decided to approach the first good looking girl I saw and present them to her in dramatic fashion.

I saw a likely candidate behind a cosmetic counter and walked right up to her, saying that she was by far the most beautiful thing I has seen all year when I noticed someone coming on one side. I heard a burst of giggles and turned to see the three ladies who had given them to me! I wanted to just slide in between the floor tiles and disappear forever!!!!!

[wow64]

I ordered Garlic chicken in English from my local restaurant when I first moved into this area. When the meal arrived it was pork. I told the lady who then told the chef. He yelled at her saying they have to cook the pork today so just tell the farang it's chicken lol. She told me with a nice smile that it was chicken haha I replied to her in Thai say that this chicken really tastes like pork but I will eat it anyway tell the chef thank you. She went bright red and told the chef I understood what he said lol. It's now a running joke when ever I return.

[h90]

I ordered Garlic chicken in English from my local restaurant when I first moved into this area. When the meal arrived it was pork. I told the lady who then told the chef. He yelled at her saying they have to cook the pork today so just tell the farang it's chicken lol. She told me with a nice smile that it was chicken haha I replied to her in Thai say that this chicken really tastes like pork but I will eat it anyway tell the chef thank you. She went bright red and told the chef I understood what he said lol. It's now a running joke when ever I return.

You didn't wonder why he has to cook the pork today?

Maybe because it was already 4 days in the fridge and starting to get alive again?

I would never return to a restaurant like that.

[bkkjames]

Was eating in a mall in one of those BBQ Western Franchise places for ribs and stuff.

American Guy next to us was screaming why dont you have Budweiser.

The nice Thai Lady replied : this ain't America.

Edited June 23, 2014 by bkkjames

[Thakkar]

Went to the TOT office at Bic C to pay my phone bill. No clients, two ladies behind the two payment counters. I walk straight up to one to pay my bill. I'm told to take a number from the number machine.

"But I'm the only one here," I protest.

She politely insists I take a number anyway.

I take a number chit and sit myself comfortably down in one of the waiting chairs a foot or so from the counter and open my book as if to settle down for a long wait. She gestures for me to approach the counter. I politely insist she call out my number.

She presses the button that calls out my number in the electronic voice. I feign surprise, look at my chit, look up at the screen to confirm and hurry up to the counter to pay. We all have a nice giggle.

How do you handle everyday absurd little situations that crop up here?

T

[Old Croc]

I had a fellow building a new little shed in which to relocate my pool pump.

It needed a sold brick wall on which to hang the electrics. He spent nearly a full day slowly building this wall to a height of about 5' including rendering. When finished, he stood up to admire his work, put a hand on the wall to support himself and knocked the whole thing over! He hadn't buttressed it or used any steel to bind the thing together and the wet cement didn't hold it.

About a week or so after he finished the job, I had a proper workman come in to demolish the structure the first guy cobbled together, and replace it with something usable. During demolition the expensive electrics just pulled straight out of the wall, they hadn't been fixed securely. When the cheap wooden frame was removed the wall fell over again. The rubble was used to fill potholes in the road outside and the rest of the cheap, nasty materials in the structure were dumped.

Lesson learnt, no point trying to get refunds from people like this.

[Cam Khao]

A few months ago, I was in my favourite lunchtime restaurant, and I wanted to order pla pau (the whole fish BBQ covered in salt). Sorry say's the waitress, we don't have any today. OK I say, I really feel like fish today, what would you recommend? She points at a fish dish on the menu (it has pictures) that I recognize as pla nin lua sawan (or however you spell it). Good choice I say, I'll have that. Sorry sir, we don't have any pla nin today she says.

I ended up with an orange curry with chicken in the end.

But my all time favorite is the water filter story. All down to the Mrs this one. She wanted a water filter from a guy that was going door to door in the village. She called me up, asked if I thought it was a good idea. The price was OK, so I said sure, go for it. The next time I went out to the house, I expected to see this nice new water filter installed probably somewhere over the sink. So imagine my surprise when I see the thing is installed half way along one of the side walls, right over the dining table, about 5 meters from the sink. I asked wifey why he had installed it in such a strange place? She explained he didn't have enough pipe with him to fit it to the back wall over the sink, and that he would have had to go and get some, but she was thirsty, and didn't want to wait so told him to put it wherever he could!

EDIT: Forgot to add, it never occurred to either of them to take a feed off the water pipe to the sink itself, he had run a whole new length of pipe from the front of the house.

Edited June 23, 2014 by Cam Khao

[AYJAYDEE]

what fun! start a thread about amusing thai moments knowing full well the thai bashers will come crawling out from every rock with all their "stupid thai" anecdotes!

[mesquite]

Today I went to the post office to pick up a package. I did that, came out, and found my car was blocked in.

No problem. I tried to push the blocking car so I could get out, but the parking brake was on. It wouldn't budge.

I waited about ten minutes and no one came out. I went back inside, explained the situation to a clerk, and was told to go upstairs. Before I could do that, a young Thai couple came out and went toward the blocking car. Great, I thought, they will move it.

But they didn't. They also tried to push it as they, too, were blocked in. Then the Thai woman went back in, upstairs, and finally the culprit, another Thai woman, ran out, got in the blocking car, started it up and eventually drove away, leaving me and the couple unblocked.

Actually it wasn't amusing. It was a pain in the butt. Why do they do this kind of stuff? Why not leave the brake off so the car can be moved?

Edited June 23, 2014 by mesquite

[ppmacready]

what fun! start a thread about amusing thai moments knowing full well the thai bashers will come crawling out from every rock with all their "stupid thai" anecdotes!

I'd politely suggest you change your grey coloured glasses to rose.

[marko kok prong]

what fun! start a thread about amusing thai moments knowing full well the thai bashers will come crawling out from every rock with all their "stupid thai" anecdotes!

Surprised you did not finish off with,"pack yer bags'.

[Seastallion]

what fun! start a thread about amusing thai moments knowing full well the thai bashers will come crawling out from every rock with all their "stupid thai" anecdotes!

So far though, it's just been non Thai-bashers with affectionately retold amusing tales.