Am I being cheap?

[hellohello123]

Hmm, the OP is trying to teach his girlfriend of three weeks, financial responsibility and budgeting, some of us having been trying to teach our wives such things for fifteen years or more and still we're not there yet!

The other striking point about what was written is the OP's complete lack of understanding of Thai culture, you're going to her mums house for the first time, sure you need to buy her a gift.

The part about the car and driver for 3.5k, silly girlfriend for doing that but doubtless she wanted to show an association to farang wealth, the issue there is 90% about "face", the 10% is likely that she wanted you to have a relaxed trip in comfort.

Good luck, you've got a way to go yet,

1st sentence - Haha true

2nd sentence - I agree, always get a gift to meet the potential inlaws, regardless of culture. In my culture, a bottle of wine, a hamper of food, a bunch of flowers, is always a good thing, however, maybe in thailand they expect a new buffalo

3rd sentence - I still dont truly understand it completely, if face was so important wouldnt she made sure she got the money from him in front of her friends and family, if she really wanted to gain face, all she would need to do is tell her family that rich farang gave her 3500 for petrol, even if he didnt

4th sentence - agree, I dont think he is tight ass, just careful, and probably smart, but a lot to learn

[JockPieandBeans]

How old are you, how old is she, and where did you pick her up from?

Does it matter ?

He is either beyond help, or talking out his @rse.

[hellohello123]

How old are you, how old is she, and where did you pick her up from?

Does it matter ?

He is either beyond help, or talking out his @rse.

That's a bit harsh

I agree he started the relationship on bad pretences by paying for her dentists bills etc

Would he be ridiculed as much if he was talking about a girl back home?

[JockPieandBeans]

How old are you, how old is she, and where did you pick her up from?

Does it matter ?

He is either beyond help, or talking out his @rse.

That's a bit harsh

I agree he started the relationship on bad pretences by paying for her dentists bills etc

Would he be ridiculed as much if he was talking about a girl back home?

Hmmmm.

Let me think about it

Ok, short answer, yes

[Tony Aparichio]

Whatever yer budget for the week, give her 1/4 to 1/3, & get her to handle some of the bills. Food is good cause she can get from the market way cheaper than you. Don't give monthly as it may all be "Needed?" elsewhere & she will likely want more. If that is not enough in her mind, you are out of yer weight class. Find one a few years older or one burdened with someone elses kids. if its still not enough go back to where ever yer from & come back with a bigger bank account, or get used to sleeping alone....

Bad Tony

[FritsSikkink]

GGuys like the OP make people like me look like high rollers.

OP, have you ever bent over and picked up a 25 satang coin?

Its not like I go looking for dinner in the local trash bin.

In USA we have a TV show called cheapskates. Those people on that show make me look like a high roller.

Don't think so, you would fit in fine.

[Skywalker69]

Mr nd you just made a grown man cry.

[benj005]

Whatever yer budget for the week, give her 1/4 to 1/3, & get her to handle some of the bills. Food is good cause she can get from the market way cheaper than you. Don't give monthly as it may all be "Needed?" elsewhere & she will likely want more. If that is not enough in her mind, you are out of yer weight class. Find one a few years older or one burdened with someone elses kids. if its still not enough go back to where ever yer from & come back with a bigger bank account, or get used to sleeping alone....

Bad Tony

I like your strategy Tony.

Thanks. [emoji3]

[mrtoad]

Whatever yer budget for the week, give her 1/4 to 1/3, & get her to handle some of the bills. Food is good cause she can get from the market way cheaper than you. Don't give monthly as it may all be "Needed?" elsewhere & she will likely want more. If that is not enough in her mind, you are out of yer weight class. Find one a few years older or one burdened with someone elses kids. if its still not enough go back to where ever yer from & come back with a bigger bank account, or get used to sleeping alone....

Bad Tony

I like your strategy Tony.

Thanks. [emoji3]

You should meet up, and share a bottle of water.

[choochoo]

Are you going to turn the air-con on for her birthday?

girl should get another bf.

[choochoo]

No woman capable of financial prudence and responsibility would move in with a guy within 3 weeks of meeting him.

shes a hooker. op doesnt realize it yet. Or at least she has the mindset of one.

[ATF]

No woman capable of financial prudence and responsibility would move in with a guy within 3 weeks of meeting him.

shes a hooker. op doesnt realize it yet. Or at least she has the mindset of one.

After meeting this guy maybe hooking is the only option left. Even hookers need love.

[Deacon Bell]

Sorry. She's with you for the money. Enjoy the ride. It works for some people.

[neverdie]

Mr nd you just made a grown man cry.

Why wot eye do?

I haven't even had u over my knee YET !

[kingalfred]

Naive young man I would say. another Thai girl who is going to use a farang for her needs and her familys'. Get out before you are bled dry.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

And the basis of your professional in depth assessment of this Thai girls character is what?

evidence .facts. Call it what you want.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[FritsSikkink]

Id be careful putting my hand into his wallet. He probably washes out and re-uses frangers. Could get nasty.

Let's put this way if the OP is fretting over such small amounts of petty cash, wait till the subject of Sin Sot comes up, he had better book himself a room in the cardiac unit of a "reasonably priced" hospital now

What's Sin Sot? Does it cost more than $1,000 baht. Cause I'm not paying a lot of money!

What are you trying to say all the time when you mention currency:

$1,000 or 1,000 baht.

There is NO $1,000 baht.

[Thanet]

Cheap is an understatement. You're as tight as a nun's crotch.

If you can't afford a girlfriend, then why have one?

[TheFishman1]

I am Jewish and you are very very Cheap just my 2 cents to post about such little money and having 200 dollar apt. In the States you woul be alone for sure lol

[Gracas]

Are you Cheap, you make the tight asses look loose with their Baht.

[thelongshoot]

Hmm, the OP is trying to teach his girlfriend of three weeks, financial responsibility and budgeting, some of us having been trying to teach our wives such things for fifteen years or more and still we're not there yet!

The other striking point about what was written is the OP's complete lack of understanding of Thai culture, you're going to her mums house for the first time, sure you need to buy her a gift.

The part about the car and driver for 3.5k, silly girlfriend for doing that but doubtless she wanted to show an association to farang wealth, the issue there is 90% about "face", the 10% is likely that she wanted you to have a relaxed trip in comfort.

Good luck, you've got a way to go yet,

Its not my first time at her mom's house. In the past I have gotten her a small gift. I had been in America for the past 7 months and my girl said I should have gotten her mom something American. I didn't and she was mad at me. I told her that I will pick something out for our next trip. I plan to remedy the situation.

I'm very big on financial responsibility. I've seen too many people who have spent their way to poverty. I don't want to be in the same boat as they are in.

You call it financial responsibility..the thai called it...kee nook...kee neow.....

GGuys like the OP make people like me look like high rollers.

OP, have you ever bent over and picked up a 25 satang coin?

yes he has. It hit him on the back of the head as he was bending down

[falkan]

tell her to get a job, plenty of well paid jobs around bangkok..

Edited July 11, 2014 by falkan

[96tehtarp]

It doesn't cost 3500 baht for gasoline to get from Bangkok to Khorat and back.

Yes, the OP is cheap financially responsible. He admits it. Fine.

The GF is setting a trend and the OP is aware of this.

Note to OP: The writing is on the wall. It is not going to work out between you and this GF. This trend will continue.

Next time consider taking a GF on the "leasing-plan". It can be cheaper because those kind of girlfriends don't usually include trips home to meet future MIL.

Trips home to visit future MIL are expected to cost a lot. One is expected to exude generosity. This applies to Thai as well as farang.

Edited July 11, 2014 by 96tehtarp

[SDM0712]

In my experience this behaviour is quite normal for some girls. In the "dim and distant " with an ex I was expected to pay at least 5000 to the Ma and do at least one trip to Big C where I would see other confused farangs pushing a trolley surrounded by extended family trying to tot up mentally how much was going in the trolley!

If you're not happy with this then time to move on Charles.

SDM

[bendejo]

Three weeks and the "money you must give" tally just keeps on running up. Must give $$ for this, $$ for that, gift for mama, 3,500b for gas (yeah right). You can give her all she asks for, and a short while later you will be informed of other things must provide (cash up front). The main topic of conversation is the things you must pay for, don't expect things to change.

Do you really think the relationship will go beyond that? The best you could hope for is one morning she tells you what you must pay for and you think "hey, she hasn't talked about $$ since 7 pm last night -- things are improving!"

If you want this relationship to work then become an alcoholic and just let her help herself to all you have until there's nothing left.

All the typical bs, right down to her keeping a boyfriend/husband in plain sight.

Wise up, amigo.

[spidermike007]

OP what nationality are you?

American. Italian/Irish with some Jewish blood from mom's side.

That's where the money thing comes in.

All that means is that you have some tendencies inflicted upon you by your upbringing. Most real men can overcome that. It is incumbent upon you to try, as that is part of personal growth. I do not consider being cheap to be a noble quality. Especially if you have the means. Being cheap, for cheap's sake, is just plain ugly for everyone involved. In my opinion, of course. The very minimum you could do is to split everything, but is there not a point where a man is a man, and he wants to look out for his gal?

Spidermike

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

[ATF]

Ben, I don't normally do this but this is a post you made on another topic "40 years old no wife and kids".

Video games my friends!

Who needs a wife and kids when you can get lost in a game for hours each and every day. Games like Skyrim are like virtual simulators. Much better than real life because you don't have to fork over money, and you can live the life of a virtual king!

For sex you can either watch porn or visit the Nana district in Bangkok.

You are one cheap assed SOB. There is a real World you know or do you?

[pwoper naughty]

You 'aving a Turkish son?

[96tehtarp]

Note to the OP:

Leave some extra cash around in the apartment, 5-6k should do. Count it carefully before hand and catch her stealing it.

If the trend she is setting continues she will be soon stealing from you, if she hasn't started already.

Then you decide if you want to put up with it.

[JimMagee]

Farang boyfriend or husband = ATM

The main reason MOST Thai girls want a farang relationship is for the money. "No money, no honey"

Yep, 3,500 for gas is inflated, but I'm sure she was hoping for spending money.

If you are hooked up with a Thai girl, then you are committing to paying for her and her families' expenses.

good luck, be generous, or count on needing to find a new Thai girl every few months.

[ice4351]

Yes--you are being cheap!!!