Lacking enthusiasm- any similar? One for over 60s.

[Postmaster]

Some great replies here for you. For me, Costas2008 got it in one! Get a young girl in your sheets, be good to her and the reward far surpasses your doubts for over 60 Living in Thailand. I hope your next post is positive.

[my friend you]

OP, you have probably lived through a lot of experiences already, so they no longer interest you. Quite natural.

Where do you live anyway? New challenges/inspirations might be waiting somewhere. "If you are looking for diamonds don't search in the fish market"

here is an Interview with Veeresh that I like:

http://www.humaniversity.com/interviews-with-veeresh/midlife-time-of-transitions

[jacko45k]

I am a bit like that, I don't get excited about anything.

I too put it down to ageing, but also being English and dull!

I think it beats being drunk!

I can only recommend exercise which is good for your health and seems to perk me up a bit.

Edited September 15, 2014 by jacko45k

[DoctorB]

Just a part of growing old I'm afraid. It's referred to as 'weltschmertz' in German; a mental depression or apathy caused by comparison of the actual state of the world with an ideal state.

By the time you're into your sixties you've seen almost everything before, and tried most things that are legal or feasible, and even maybe a few things that aren't legal.

That's why politicians are so irritating when you grow older; they just come up with the same old ideas and half-baked solutions to the world's problems that you remember from last time round.

All you can do is try to find something that makes you happy even if only briefly and that does not hurt anyone else.

On the other hand, are you on beta blockers? They certainly take the excitement out of life.

Edited September 15, 2014 by DoctorB

[carter1882]

Have a baby. It will take you mind off things and give you a purpose. Your problem is that you are too self centred.

[slipperylobster]

My mom used to say....boring is as boring does.

Not really, but the truth is, you are boring to yourself. It is easy to make fun. If you sit home and think to yourself that your day would be complete if there was toilet paper in the bathroom and a museum to visit...you are indeed a boring person.

Most things that you can do in your homeland, can also be done here. There are gyms, healthfood stores, mountains, rivers, boats, bicycles, camping, hiking, fishing, classes, volunteer work, car shows.....well the list goes on.

If you are bored here, you would be dull anywhere. Sometimes you just need to pick yourself up and do something. The more you go out and network, look around and travel, the more people you run into and the more ideas you get. Sitting in one place does nothing for you. That is why I always was reluctant to give money to a wife/gf to buy a house for me here. It is much better to rent...and when the mood strikes you...move on. One sunrise and sunset if a new location can change your attitude.

Edited September 16, 2014 by slipperylobster

[poweratradio]

Since I turned 60 and retired in Thailand I'm full of enthusiasm, I get exited about everything, I do lots of things I didn't use to do before and even if I can't complete what I'm doing I give it a go and put my best effort.

I go to bed at 10 in the night wake up at 6:00 in the morning to appreciate the beautiful sunrise and the morning breeze.

I do laugh a lot and when others are miserable around me I make them laugh also.

Have blood test every 6 months and every time the doctor gives me the same answer.

You will live.

No, what you got is not normal process of ageing, it's yourself.

Change your diet, change your habits, change the way you are living

Fight it man.

60 you are still young, enjoy the many years you have still to come.

Never surrender.

And sometimes go and find a young lady and have a nice time with her.

It works miracles.

Careful your wife doesn't know, because you will not go of old age.

Your way off topic again Costas2008 driving your own agenda again. wow your a piece of work.

[poweratradio]

What you describe sounds like mild depression.

Do check your testosterone levels as this can sometimes be linked to low T.

If not, you might consider counseling -- some short term therapy to help you deal with the depression. It may have to do with the particular challenges this phase of life presents. At this age, you know most of your life is behind you and you have also seen through a lot of the things that used to attract you/seem like a source of happiness. You can't get excited about them because you know their limits already. ..been there/done that/not all it's cracked up to be.

That's natural. But you need to find other avenues of meaning for yourself to successfully navigate late middle age/start of old age.

It is especially hard due to the tremendous emphasis on youth our culture places. It doesn't really offer us any solutions other than to try to stave off aging/look and act as young as possible, which is not really the healthiest approach. It was easier in traditional societies which accepted aging and put value on older people's experience of life.

As I said, had the testosterone test.

Been down the councelling and drug route for depression, as the Dr was trying everything possible

< It may have to do with the particular challenges this phase of life presents>

Started long before I retired. Far from my life being over when I retired, I was looking forward to it and being able to live full time in Thailand. Have a long list of things to do now that I'm not working. Unfortunately most of them will never get done, unless I can get some enthusiasm back into my life. I KNOW that I should be enjoying every day, but I just don't and it's not a mind over matter thing. Something is definitely wrong, but what?

Form/join a gang become a smuggler and think of the lift you would get after clearing customs with your contraband. If you get caught apply for repatriation to your own country after 3 years.

[smotherb]

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

[Duggsie]

You need a problem.

We wake up and fire up when faced with a problem.

You have no problems.

That's likely your problem.

[The Usual Suspect]

Since I turned 60 and retired in Thailand I'm full of enthusiasm, I get exited about everything, I do lots of things I didn't use to do before and even if I can't complete what I'm doing I give it a go and put my best effort.

I go to bed at 10 in the night wake up at 6:00 in the morning to appreciate the beautiful sunrise and the morning breeze.

I do laugh a lot and when others are miserable around me I make them laugh also.

Have blood test every 6 months and every time the doctor gives me the same answer.

You will live.

No, what you got is not normal process of ageing, it's yourself.

Change your diet, change your habits, change the way you are living

Fight it man.

60 you are still young, enjoy the many years you have still to come.

Never surrender.

And sometimes go and find a young lady and have a nice time with her.

It works miracles.

Careful your wife doesn't know, because you will not go of old age.

I totally agree with you Costas! I was going to comment, but you've already said it all. One thing I might add though......My father is 89 years old and has been like the OP as long as I can remember. How he has lived this long is a mystery to me. I am a firm believer in the old adage, "If you don't use it, you lose it!".

[jpinx]

A few links to interesting and non-drastic measures ...

-- http://www.mercola.com/testosterone.aspx
-- http://www.ehow.com/way_5572333_foods-testosterone-replacement.html
-- http://www.healthaliciousness.com/articles/zinc.php

[BradinAsia]

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

I agree with you about the differences between people.

You may consider writing a novel or studying languages boring, but for me watching football, baseball or basketball is super boring.

Or watching fishing or golf on TV -- for me, about as exciting as watching grass grow... but to each his own.

Most amazing is to see adults who spend huge amounts of time doing things like computer games or sitting in a bar drinking beer

everyday. I ask myself -- If I did this my whole life, would I die any smarter than when I was born? If the answer is no, I purposely

avoid those kinds of activities. But some folks seem to be happy with that.

A lot of my fellow Americans can't speak anything but English, and even in English cannot write a grammatically correct sentence.

Nor can they find London on a map, but if they're satisfied with that level of mental acuity, why should we bad-mouth them?... LOL.

[BradinAsia]

I sympathise with you. I am 61 and have similar feelings. I have no hobbies and only one real friend in Thailand. I go to lots of parties and the local farang bar and get hammered several times a week....and this is no answer. My g/f is very understanding, but she is 15 years younger than me and really would like to do more things, but I never seem to have the energy and am tired all the time.

I have tried all sorts of stuff to revive some energy but nothing seems to work....I'm just hoping for an early death.

I got a good laugh out of this. I'm still wondering if you are serious or not.

About 30 yrs ago, I went thru my first divorce. The process of giving all my worldly possession to

a woman I had come to loathe was bad enough, but then for the first time in my life I had to face

being all alone. Coming home to three motorcycles parked in my garage could not over-ride the

the dreariness of an empty house.

I soon discovered that hanging out in bar was the wrong solution. I decided I had to do something

constructive. I bought a motocross bike and started competing in the local amateur MX races every

Sunday. In my spare time I started restoring an old Honda CL450 with the gorgeous DOHC engine.

Then I met a cute Chinese girl who wanted me to tutor her in English. Then I realized how good it

was that I had spent 5 years studying Chinese instead of watching football on TV.

Ended up that she wanted to learn a lot more than English and I had to keep my energy level up.

Sure beats waiting to die... LOL.

[jacky54]

I'd rather kill myself than learn a language!

[keithkarmann]

Just over 3 years ago my wife of almost 30 years was killed in a horrific car accident in Greece. Still feeling young 3 weeks after my 60th Birthday I made the decision that I was not going to get depressed and that I had plenty of happy years left. Yes I like ladies and that is the reason I moved to Chiang Mai where I am happy most of the time. In fairness I have slowed down to what I used to do in Greece and it is difficult trying to work here due to the heat but when I have a project to do I usually work in the heat. I understand that not all men have the same interests but you have to discover what you need to do and like and concentrate on those things.A lot of my time is spent in the company of my much younger girlfriend and I do not have time to get depressed, although living with a Thai girl can get you very stressed at times but they are there for you for stress relief when you need it.

[thaibeachlovers]

I sympathise with you. I am 61 and have similar feelings. I have no hobbies and only one real friend in Thailand. I go to lots of parties and the local farang bar and get hammered several times a week....and this is no answer. My g/f is very understanding, but she is 15 years younger than me and really would like to do more things, but I never seem to have the energy and am tired all the time.

I have tried all sorts of stuff to revive some energy but nothing seems to work....I'm just hoping for an early death.

I see your problem,

You need a gf 30+ years younger than you.

You will suddenly have a lot more energy.

After a couple of hours cycling, then a bit of a run, if I'm still feeling a bit listless, I go hang out at a shopping mall with my pals.

We can talk quietly together about the meaning of life the universe and everything and suddenly .... "Oh, my god, look at the shorts and heels on that one" ......

Everything seems so much better.

<and suddenly .... "Oh, my god, look at the shorts and heels on that one" ......>

Yes indeed, that is about the only thing left in life that can stir a bit of interest in my brain cells. Sadly, due to whatever assails me, I can only admire, but I don't get turned on anymore. For someone that has always had a serious interest in the opposite sex, that is perhaps the biggest disappointment in my current situation .

[thaibeachlovers]

ThaiBeachLovers. Try sucking a Vitamin C tablet each day.

I took 1,000 mg every day for mosty of my life. Down to 500 a day now, as don't want to have a problem if for any reason I can't take them any more- like having a heart attack and ending up in hospital for a long time. I understand that stopping them suddenly might cause scurvy.

So, unfortunately, that's not the answer.

[thaibeachlovers]

I am now 71 years young from the UK and live in Thailand. I have a young Thai wife and feel as if I am 50 all over again. I have never experienced the symptoms the OP describes and I agree with what Costas 2008 says.

If you are still a resident in the UK come to Thailand and see the difference the diet and lifestyle makes to those symptoms.

Been living in Thailand for some years now. Makes zero difference in my problem.

Don't get hayfever now though, so that's a plus.

[thaibeachlovers]

Sorry, just re-read the OP and realised you may be in the UK, not Thailand. But a complete change of environment is still what I suggest.

No, in Thailand. Used to live in the UK.

I day dreamed for years about finally having the opportunity to live here, but now it, sadly, doesn't have any of the zing I was hoping to experience. Such is life.

[smotherb]

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

I agree with you about the differences between people.

You may consider writing a novel or studying languages boring, but for me watching football, baseball or basketball is super boring.

Or watching fishing or golf on TV -- for me, about as exciting as watching grass grow... but to each his own.

Most amazing is to see adults who spend huge amounts of time doing things like computer games or sitting in a bar drinking beer

everyday. I ask myself -- If I did this my whole life, would I die any smarter than when I was born? If the answer is no, I purposely

avoid those kinds of activities. But some folks seem to be happy with that.

A lot of my fellow Americans can't speak anything but English, and even in English cannot write a grammatically correct sentence.

Nor can they find London on a map, but if they're satisfied with that level of mental acuity, why should we bad-mouth them?... LOL.

well, research, writing and studying are two of the things I do; but the filing, replying to stupid letters and poor service, reorganizing bookshelves, tidying and sorting papers (twice), writing snail mail, etc., I find boring. My files/books are digital, I phone dinosaurs, and I circumvent stupidity. I can pass the time through research and writing, and even watching sports. However, I need to get out to avoid boredom.

[thaibeachlovers]

Sorry, just re-read the OP and realised you may be in the UK, not Thailand. But a complete change of environment is still what I suggest.

Probably vitamin D deficiency caused by lack of sunshine then.

Especially if he was previously living in Thailand.

Seasonal Affective Disorder

http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-things-you-dont-know-about-seasonal-affective-disorder/0002

Some claim this helps

http://www.iherb.com/product-reviews/source-naturals-gaba-calm-120-tablets/1200/?p=1

<caused by lack of sunshine then>

Sorry, not that either.

My wife always laughs when I take my pants off as I have a very brown upper torso and a very white band where I was wearing shorts.

I work outside a lot, and never wear a shirt, unless I'm going to town.

[thaibeachlovers]

It is a bit off topic, but maybe interesting:

I saw a lot men (might be the same for women????)

The work in the company, 60 active.....Lets say 3 men just as example:

1 retires....5 years later with 65 he aged 20 years and neither his mind nor his body is fit.

1 continues working and with 65 he exactly the same as with 60 minus a few hair

1 retires but has some strong hobby more busy than during the work....didn't change.

There is the old saying about asking a 90 year old why he is still appearing so young and active "Because I never had time to age."

Of course over simplified but maybe partially true

<1 retires but has some strong hobby more busy than during the work....didn't change.>

That's me. I had this affliction for years before retiring. Nothing has changed since.

[thaibeachlovers]

I feel exactly like you. But I think it has more to do with exercise then anything else.

I decide to take time off work last year. Had many plans as I saw myself golfing twice a week and getting out a lot. But in reality I turned myself into being a couch potato. The longer I went the lazier I got. Sometimes didn't leave the house for a week. I just thought there was nothing out their I wanted to see nor had a reason to go for the sake of just going. Even gave up drinking as it bored me.

My problem is I hate exercise. Walking down these sidewalks drives me crazy. Hitting the gym has got to be the most boring thing in the world to do. I don't like jogging and never did. I like golfing but can never find a partner as they are still working so got bored with that to.

But I can't say that I feel depressed. Just lazy as they come now. So I am going to go back to work for awhile. I never felt this way when I was working. I used to get excited about just coming home then. Always had energy then to.

Maybe this relates to you to? But I am sure we are not the only ones.

Could be something to do with it. I used to be a great walker and would go on rambles for hours. Then I damaged my knee and long walks became a thing of the past. I tried joining the Ramblers club in London, but the first walk I went on became a nightmare when my knee packed up in the middle of nowhere countryside.

[Bernard Flint]

I assumE you live in the uk, as all your tests have been free on the NHS????

Or maybe you only live part time in Thailand

I would be depressed at 63, living in UK, but here in Thailand i feel years younger,energetic most days,can even have sex twice, sometimes three times i one night,the only stimulant is my thai missus

[Alwyn]

I've read quite a few posts asking you about your testosterone levels, even if your testosterone levels are low, you can still enjoy life, but the only person who can make that happen is you my friend. I'm 50 and in the process of having my testosterone systematically killed with hormone manipulation therapy. It's part of the treatment for my locally advanced prostate cancer. Prostate cancer feeds off testosterone so the doctors are killing my testosterone! I feel absolutely great on a personal level, I simply programmed myself to enjoy stuff! I have to exercise and diet properly as side effects of my treatment can include osteoporosis and my body cannibalizing itself, eating me lean muscle tissue etc. I've always been of the thought that nobody else except me decides what my mood is going to be except me, I simple use that process re the treatment. Bottom line is that you're in control of yourself, nobody else. You want to be happy, then decide to be happy. Counselling no doubt helps but if you're in Thailand I doubt you'll get it there. One of the biggest triggers for your symptoms is loneliness. Pick yourself up (not easy, I appreciate) and meet people, whether at the pub or gym etc. Good luck with everything!

[thaibeachlovers]

All the symptoms you describe I had around 10 years ago when i was 44 / 45. I was always the sort of guy who thought I was very strong minded and could handle any situation alone. I was that type of guy who would tell another person with these same symptoms to 'get a grip, pull themselves together, and dont wallow in self pity'. But then after a few fairly major changes in my life ( I wont bore you with the details - but i had no control over the changes ), around 6 months after these changes I found I was exactly as you describe. I couldnt see the point in getting up in the morning, It seemed like I had no goal in life, I just couldnt see a purpose to living. I didnt feel suicidal or anything like that, but just was 100 percent unmotivated about everything. Is this you?

I now looking back realise i was depressed ( never ever suffered with it before and since ). I actually sought medical help and the doctors answer was to prescribe some bloody pills. When asked if the pills would solve my problem he retorted NO BUT THEY SHOULD MAKE TO FEEL BETTER!!! I declined the tablets and realised I had to solve my problem myself, just as I had always done with past problems. This is when I relocated out to Thailand permanently, found a nice young lady, found a hobby to occupy myself ( when the lady was out ) and bingo I have never felt depressed since. That was 10 years ago.

I would ask have you experienced any big changes in your life in the last year, something that could explain your depression. You are depressed 100 per cent ( in my lowly opinion ). Please ditch the tablets and tackle this head on alone or with your partner. If you dont have a goal or reason to get up in the morning, then do something to give you that reason to get up. You can do it, I assure you.

I wish you good luck, remenber in life, never give up and strive constantly for personal fulfillment.

Thanks for your contribution. However, I have probably had a low level depression all my life and it might have got worse for some, as yet, unexplainable reason. After all, they can't cure Alzheimers despite all that research. Sometimes I think I have early onset Alzheimers as my memory is pretty bad now. Don't want to think about it too much though, as that is pretty scary.

<This is when I relocated out to Thailand permanently, found a nice young lady, found a hobby to occupy myself ( when the lady was out ) and bingo I have never felt depressed since.>

Glad for you that that is all it took, but I have done that ( and certainly have all the hobby I could desire ), but hasn't made any difference.

Some things are just unexplainable at present, and I think I have one of those conditions. Just a lot disappointing that I'm in a place I love, with a wife I love, with the freedom to do whatever I please ( within reason ) and it's all just "flat".

[thaibeachlovers]

Thanks for all the replies so far.

Keep going buddy. I'm only 46 and am exactly where you are; so much to do, in a very comfortable position but have zero enthusiasm to do stuff. However, when I make the effort I do enjoy whatever it is I do - that does make it even more frustrating that I then can't be bothered the next time around. I've been like this for a few years now but it has got worse over the last couple of years. I put mine down to depression to a degree and have been on happy pills over the past year but they make little difference. I've had a crap couple of years but know I will get through it.

However, I believe my main problem is lack of sleep (at the right time). It's a major problem I've had for years and years and I think it catches up with you and wears you down. Could that be an issue with you?

As I say, keep going. It's not unique, so you're not a freak or anything. Small steps. Change in habits. And the alternative is way way worse. That's how I know I'll pull through it and hope you do too. :-)

Thanks for that. Now I know I'm not alone- your reply has helped immensly.

< in a very comfortable position but have zero enthusiasm to do stuff> DITTO.

The sleep thing might have a contribution. It's not that I don't sleep now, but I just don't seem to to need much sleep nowadays. However, when I was working, I didn't get as much sleep as I needed owing to shift work.

Stress could be a factor too. When I was working I was constantly stressed. That has to have an effect over a long time.

Just your reply has made this thread worthwhile.

Thanks again.

[thaibeachlovers]

Not normal, sounds like low testosterone level but could also be from Thyroid condition. Also as we age the body doesn't utilise vitamins as well so should take multi vitamin suppliment as well as extra strength B complex to increase energy and if in England not Thailand Vitamin D =(Sunshine vitamin)

You have to make a change sitting typing about it will accomplish nothing need to try everything you can to overcome the feelings.

Thanks, I'll give the multi vits a try.

[thaibeachlovers]

Mate (OP), I have led a fairly active life, one way or another , as an older guy than you I am now in a similar position, the adventure has gone, though I have found a couple of things that interest me. When I look at stuff I am very similar to my parents as they aged, meaning perhaps stuff changes as we get older, the way we look at things.

For me friendship is a big plus, but alas hard to find cos folk have their idea in older life and for sure friendship ain't one for many, just their wee world that "age" has brought them. Sorry, difficult to put into words...

I do still have adventures. I take my wife lots of places in Thailand. The bummer is though, that when we go somewhere I'd have been enthralled with 10 years ago, I'm thinking ho hum. That's what I mean about lacking enthusiasm. I just don't get a buzz out of life anymore, which really is a shame.

I went to Penang on a visa run a while back, but when I got there I was so unenthusiastic I cut my planned week there to 2 days and came back home to watch rubbish on tv instead.

thaibeachlovers, maybe you need adventures without the Mrs?

Hmmmmm. If I had the enthusiasm for the opposite sex I had 10 years ago I'd probably do that, but now.................................

Whenever my wife tells me she's scared I'd like to go with other women I reassure her that I just don't have the interest anymore, and it's actually the truth, sad to say.