Neologism Contest

[udon]

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to

its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate

meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are

run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with

Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that,

when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men

[That kid Chris]

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to

its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate

meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are

run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with

Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that,

when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men

And this is funny???

[Plus]

Why bold type, Udon, something personal?

[udon]

Why bold type, Udon, something personal?

Nope. It's for the visually challenged.

[suegha]

These are absolutely fantastic. I love to play on words, I must dig some out and post them.

[Lacoste]

Nice

[udon]

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to

its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate

meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men

And this is funny???

My apologies, are there too many big words for you...?

(1st post, yeah, right....)