Money - Thai

[tourleadersi]

Bills are bills and cost a certain amount. Are these amounts the same every month?

Why does the wife not have access to an account to pay bills?

All of this sounds too much like husbands don't trust their wives and give them money to bay bills and pocketmoney.

You're right, it does sound that way.

In my defence I give my wife my ATM card and she transfers the money from my account to hers. This makes it easier to keep track of. The remaining balance at the end of the month gets put into her savings account. As for other money, if she needs anything she just asks me (only because I am the one keeping track of what money is where) and I give her the relevant ATM card. There are no questions like "How much?" (except if the accounts are low so I get the right account) or "What for?" I trust her implicitly. When I work overseas I leave her all but one ATM card with details on how much money is in each should there be an emergency with her or her family. Thats happened about 15 times and she has never once made a withdrawl. She knows how much I earn, and I show her the different bank statements from time to time, although she really isn't interested preferring to leave me to sort that side of things out myself.

Sounds like a relationship based on mutaul respect, honesty and integrity, tourleadersi - values that seem to be missing in many of the wife/finance departments in many posts. Good for you.

Thanks, I would like to think so.

[martin_l]

think ur a bit crazy giving her that much

[Donz]

I just dont get some of you members, I mean sheeeeeeeeet.

Why do you let your gf take over your lives, give her salaries etc.

Man up and treat her like your wife, dont let her use you for your money and if you cant trust her with a joint account or trust her to have access to your cash then why would you be with her

[DrFisher]

Hummmmm.....

My car payment and house payment come to 11,000B per month. My wife takes care of all the bills and money and she gives me 1,000B per week; I seem to have 500-800B left over every week from the 1,000B she gives me because I can't really find anything to spend it on.Granted my wife does pay when we go out and for food, clothing, gas, etc. but if I were you I would want to know where the money was going.

[Scott]

My other half gets no money from me. Once in a while when funds are short, I take care of things, but that's about it. The family gets absolutely nothing and never has. They have never asked and I was told not to offer.

It works out fine.

Now if I could get my maid to understand that I cannot bury all of her relatives (who conveniently die about the time I get paid). I am not responsible for sick buffaloes, school fees, bail money and gambling debts!

[alexth]

My other half gets no money from me. Once in a while when funds are short, I take care of things, but that's about it. The family gets absolutely nothing and never has. They have never asked and I was told not to offer.

It works out fine.

Now if I could get my maid to understand that I cannot bury all of her relatives (who conveniently die about the time I get paid). I am not responsible for sick buffaloes, school fees, bail money and gambling debts!

I used to give some money from times to times to my gf's mother, that stopped when my gf got pissed and told her mother to move upcountry and work like the rest of the family does. Since then we only sent her 1000 THB for her birthday as we were busy and couldn't attend her birthday party and get her a proper birthday gift.

[ray23]

Well my two cetns worth again a bit long winded I guess. It would seem to me that if what you do makes you happy, then do it. If it doesn't then you need to change things so that you and your wife are happy.

Money is a very personal issue in a marriage, I don't believe that Thai ladies think that , since it seems to be one of the first things discussed when they meet a new lady. This is and is not a Thai issue in that money seems to be one of the major causes of break ups and marriages world wide.

My position is actually very simple I want her to have enough to feel that she has some control over her life. On the other hand I want the same thing for myself. That is what we work to achieve. Now that being said would she to like to have total control find me a wife that doesn't, ( said or not being said) just human nature.

I came her single in pursuit of my happines, nothing has changed I still want that, came half way around the world to get it. But things did change when I married now I have to consider another persons happiness, I love her and want her to enjoy life to. At the moment we are lucky enough to have those things in both our lives that add to each of our enjoyments. Thats pretty darn good place to be in life. If that ever changes my personal wishes will take a back seat to my families needs, If I couldn't do that I would never have gotten married.

So I think in reality another $25.00 a week really isn't going to shatter our worlds, if it does then you probably need to leave and go back to work. Being broke is no fun no matter where you are. Some of this sounds a lot like control issues as opposed to money probelms.

The reality in life is if you don't feel comfortable with letting go of any control then you probably would be more happy being single and having everything you way. Nothing wrong with that and it can certainly be done easily enough here.

If you want the stability and the comfort of a marriage it will be a give and take, unless of course she is just tolerating you for the money. Now some people were never really meant to be married and sometimes couples get together and find that they can not treat eachother fairly and with respect. The answer to that is you are both probably in a destructive relationship, may be time to move on if you can't find a mutual course.

Each person has to come to thier own conclusions as to the marriages and it has nothing to do with mine our anyone else thoughts. My wife is far from perfect but then again niether am I. She tolerates my mistakes and I do the same for her. That being said many of you would never want what I have for a marriage, but I don't ask you to live it.

I wonder how much of the original post was about blowing off steam we all need to do that from time to time. How much if it was really looking for answers, I doubt that was the case.

[Donz]

It depends on what your situation is also.

For me my future extended family are pretty well off so i wont be looking after any of them, but if I was with a girl and i was wealthy, I would probaly give her some money so she can buy the things she wants, if I saw some of her family member living in a tin shed with no electricity I would definately give them a helping hand and try to get them off there feet. Her friends who are like that I wouldnt help, unless I really wanted too, but I wouldnt let the wife suck me into it.

Some of you who do it and have the money to afford it I have no problem about, but some of you who do it but cant afford it and moan about the wife is taking all my money I have no sympathy for, I mean hold old are you?

[the swagman]

My guess, he should have got to know his lady longer than a week before jumping into marital bliss.

[udon]

Has the OP qualified what the 5000 a week was for?

Pocket money or household bills?

I thought it was pocket money.

[LindsayBKK]

Here we go again! Seen this so many times it's starting to get boring.

Yes get a new wife obviously you don't know this one very well.

Know your partner!

You guys are stupid when it comes to girls & money, if you flash it around in Thailand then you get what you deserve.

[Donz]

Here we go again! Seen this so many times it's starting to get boring.

Yes get a new wife obviously you don't know this one very well.

Know your partner!

You guys are stupid when it comes to girls & money, if you flash it around in Thailand then you get what you deserve.

yes

[Gary A]

If the 5,000 baht a week is pocket money then none of us can help him. My wife likes to control the household money and I like her to have some left over for herself. Giving her 20,000 baht a month works well for both of us.

Has the OP qualified what the 5000 a week was for?

Pocket money or household bills?

I thought it was pocket money.

[tourleadersi]

Has the OP qualified what the 5000 a week was for?

Pocket money or household bills?

I thought it was pocket money.

I agree, I think it is pocket money. He makes no mention of asking her to cut back on household expenditures to allow for the 500 Baht a week drop. Sounds like she anticipates struggling on only 18k a month.

[udon]

I have been giving my thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

My monthly bills are now higher than my monthly bills were when i initially started giving my Thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

I have told my wife that i want to start giving her 4,500 baht per week instead of 5,000 baht per week. My wife does not like my proposal and wants to start a hostile argument over money. I think this a decent and fair proposal.

Why do thais not understand basic economics. Do all thais think that farang are just an ATM machine?

Any helpful advice out there?

Gabe.

here's a simple test for you to find out how strong your relationship is with your wife.

Give her 5000B a MONTH.!

She will either stick by you or bugger off at the earliest.

Go on, try it.

[tourleadersi]

I have been giving my thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

My monthly bills are now higher than my monthly bills were when i initially started giving my Thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

I have told my wife that i want to start giving her 4,500 baht per week instead of 5,000 baht per week. My wife does not like my proposal and wants to start a hostile argument over money. I think this a decent and fair proposal.

Why do thais not understand basic economics. Do all thais think that farang are just an ATM machine?

Any helpful advice out there?

Gabe.

here's a simple test for you to find out how strong your relationship is with your wife.

Give her 5000B a MONTH.!

She will either stick by you or bugger off at the earliest.

Go on, try it.

Isn't it a really screwed up situation when someone might hesitate to cut the money for fear that the woman may leave them? I don't think I could maintain a relationship with that thought always in the back of my mind. Man that must be tough. What happens if you get sick and lose your earning power, a double kick in the teeth perhaps?

Follow Ubons advice Gabe and test the relationship that you have. One word of extra advice, if she does bail on you don't mug yourself about it. You will have just joined the ranks of so many others here in Thailand. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and give it another go though with perhaps less offers of financial incentives.

[RamdomChances]

My wife usually gives me a couple of thousand bhat a month, more if i need it !! she does pay all the bills though...since all the account/credit cards ect are in joint names I suppose I could have more but it would mean going to the bank.

[alexth]

I have been giving my thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

My monthly bills are now higher than my monthly bills were when i initially started giving my Thai wife 5,000 baht per week.

I have told my wife that i want to start giving her 4,500 baht per week instead of 5,000 baht per week. My wife does not like my proposal and wants to start a hostile argument over money. I think this a decent and fair proposal.

Why do thais not understand basic economics. Do all thais think that farang are just an ATM machine?

Any helpful advice out there?

Gabe.

here's a simple test for you to find out how strong your relationship is with your wife.

Give her 5000B a MONTH.!

She will either stick by you or bugger off at the earliest.

Go on, try it.

Isn't it a really screwed up situation when someone might hesitate to cut the money for fear that the woman may leave them? I don't think I could maintain a relationship with that thought always in the back of my mind. Man that must be tough. What happens if you get sick and lose your earning power, a double kick in the teeth perhaps?

Follow Ubons advice Gabe and test the relationship that you have. One word of extra advice, if she does bail on you don't mug yourself about it. You will have just joined the ranks of so many others here in Thailand. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and give it another go though with perhaps less offers of financial incentives.

And Gabe, quit merrying bar girls. Some of the guys are lucky and could have a happy marriage, but most of them...well