Relationships and Thai culture. Keep it simple.

[smotherb]

Simple? She wants money; I want sex ... and the rest we work out as necessary.

yeah, but she keeps getting new money and you get the same old sex

[JLCrab]

Simple? She wants money; I want sex ... and the rest we work out as necessary.

yeah, but she keeps getting new money and you get the same old sex

Ain't nothing about her old.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

It's a bad photo, trust me. I'll race you up Doi Suthep tomorrow.

You're on

7:00 am at the start of Pilgrim's Trail.

Don't be late, you won't be able to catch up.

OP:

Before you head out the door - - some parting questions:

Who won the race between you and AnotherOneAmerican this morning?

He was a 'no show' so I won by default.

It was hot, and I struggled up to Wat Doi Suthep in just under an hour.

[ChiangMaiFalung]

Sipi,

Thanks for your post. You look happy, and the young guy does too. I am sure you will have many great experiences together at home and around the place. Simple - Great way to view it. Nothing wrong with that. Please ignore the flak from some above, they will likely never be as happy as you.

[Digitalnomade]

You are right dear OP. I keep it simple as well, reason is my style to KISS and my funds are kept outside of reach of thais.

I try to not get some governments get involved in my life style, it means no marriage, no loan, no contract, simple visa (tourist for now), no tax report, no fbar and fatca (that s for usa), no embassy report, no health insurance (just another Ripp off), no house buying(I know guys who lost it).

We live in a system which is like moving sand... It looks nice first, then you walk and suddenly you go down and down... More you move more you get stuck. .

This is our society of today. Still many don't t see it like I do, because most people still live with fairy tales...

Edited October 5, 2014 by Digitalnomade

[billd766]

If I wanted to keep it simple I don't think I'd get married. All the best anyhow

Damn straight.

That and I'd have avoided having a child in my 60s.

Who wants to have to make the choice between being comfortable but putting him/her through the Thai education system or scraping by while sending him/her to private or international school?

Double post. Sorry

Edited October 5, 2014 by billd766

[billd766]

If I wanted to keep it simple I don't think I'd get married. All the best anyhow

Damn straight.

That and I'd have avoided having a child in my 60s.

Who wants to have to make the choice between being comfortable but putting him/her through the Thai education system or scraping by while sending him/her to private or international school?

Good for you sipi. It obviously works for you and certainly does work for me.

Me. I am 70 and my son is 10.

We are fairly comfortable but not scraping by.

He is the light of my life. My other son is 35.

I was a late entrant into the marriage stakes.

[billd766]

Yeah simple. You have a child that most likely won't see his father at his high school graduation. That is simple minded of you nothing more.

As for marriage it is never simple nor is life. Simplifying what is important takes a lot of work but that I will agree is necessary for prolonged happiness.

Being as old as you are, I guess you have already had all of the arguments, difficulties and achievements. Now you are on the down spiral of life so you have less attachment to things. I doubt that is the best role model for an equity relationship. Just not caring anymore to the point you are just happy with any "Thaiwife" and starting a family isn't my idea of something to emulate.

But go on bang your drum how great your marriage is and how great of a person you are to start a family in your twilight years.

What a load of rubbish obviously written by someone younger with little experience of life.

[Cypress Hill]

If I wanted to keep it simple I don't think I'd get married. All the best anyhow

Damn straight.

That and I'd have avoided having a child in my 60s.

Who wants to have to make the choice between being comfortable but putting him/her through the Thai education system or scraping by while sending him/her to private or international school?

Good for you sipi. It obviously works for you and certainly does work for me.

Me. I am 70 and my son is 10.

We are fairly comfortable but not scraping by.

He is the light of my life. My other son is 35.

I was a late entrant into the marriage stakes.

Having children at 60 is not something I'd do especially if, at the time, I had a son of 25 already but each to their own.

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Not sure what a proper education is anymore,

my 3yo boy seems to be doing fine speaking Central/Lanna/Burmese and English.

He's been nowhere near any school yet & he already owns a small farm.

Plenty of TEFL teachers scraping the barrel in Thailand, a western education didn't seem to do them much good.

[billd766]

If I wanted to keep it simple I don't think I'd get married. All the best anyhow

Damn straight.

That and I'd have avoided having a child in my 60s.

Who wants to have to make the choice between being comfortable but putting him/her through the Thai education system or scraping by while sending him/her to private or international school?

Good for you sipi. It obviously works for you and certainly does work for me.

Me. I am 70 and my son is 10.

We are fairly comfortable but not scraping by.

He is the light of my life. My other son is 35.

I was a late entrant into the marriage stakes.

Having children at 60 is not something I'd do especially if, at the time, I had a son of 25 already but each to their own.

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Yet another double post. Sorry.

Edited October 5, 2014 by billd766

[billd766]

If I wanted to keep it simple I don't think I'd get married. All the best anyhow

Damn straight.

That and I'd have avoided having a child in my 60s.

Who wants to have to make the choice between being comfortable but putting him/her through the Thai education system or scraping by while sending him/her to private or international school?

Good for you sipi. It obviously works for you and certainly does work for me.

Me. I am 70 and my son is 10.

We are fairly comfortable but not scraping by.

He is the light of my life. My other son is 35.

I was a late entrant into the marriage stakes.

Having children at 60 is not something I'd do especially if, at the time, I had a son of 25 already but each to their own.

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Absolutely.

I was 34 when my first son was born in the UK and my then wife was 32.

I was 60 and my Thai wife was 38 when my second son was born.

My Mum was 39 and my Dad 55 when I was born. It sort of runs in the family.

Sadly my Dad died 2 months before I left school and so he never got to see me in the uniform of the RAF which I joined in January 1960.

On the bright side I am alraedy 1 year older than my Dad when he died back in 1959.

Edited October 5, 2014 by billd766

[Cypress Hill]

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Not sure what a proper education is anymore,

my 3yo boy seems to be doing fine speaking Central/Lanna/Burmese and English.

He's been nowhere near any school yet & he already owns a small farm

Oh well that's it then; no need to send him to school

[FACTOR]

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Not sure what a proper education is anymore,

my 3yo boy seems to be doing fine speaking Central/Lanna/Burmese and English.

He's been nowhere near any school yet & he already owns a small farm.

Your 3 year old son ... already owns a small farm? AnotherOneAmerican, is there something else you'd like to share with us?

[FACTOR]

Plenty of TEFL teachers scraping the barrel in Thailand, a western education didn't seem to do them much good.

So you are not referring to the EFL teachers ("TEFL teacher" is a bit awkward; one teaches EFL, not TEFL.) who are qualified and certified and pulling in 100,000 baht + a month working at proper schools filling a real need, right?

[ChiangMaiFalung]

In the past 10 years, I have met many English Teachers that make a lot less than 100,000 baht a month, some at 'proper' schools.

[sipi]

It's a bad photo, trust me. I'll race you up Doi Suthep tomorrow.

You're on

7:00 am at the start of Pilgrim's Trail.

Don't be late, you won't be able to catch up.

OP:

Before you head out the door - - some parting questions:

Who won the race between you and AnotherOneAmerican this morning?

He was a 'no show' so I won by default.

It was hot, and I struggled up to Wat Doi Suthep in just under an hour.

Sorry about the "no-show". I couldn't fly in before 7am, so we took our yacht for a run instead.

Maybe next time we keep it simple and just catch up over a beer.

[Concerned expat]

Yeah simple. You have a child that most likely won't see his father at his high school graduation. That is simple minded of you nothing more.

As for marriage it is never simple nor is life. Simplifying what is important takes a lot of work but that I will agree is necessary for prolonged happiness.

Being as old as you are, I guess you have already had all of the arguments, difficulties and achievements. Now you are on the down spiral of life so you have less attachment to things. I doubt that is the best role model for an equity relationship. Just not caring anymore to the point you are just happy with any "Thaiwife" and starting a family isn't my idea of something to emulate.

But go on bang your drum how great your marriage is and how great of a person you are to start a family in your twilight years.

I'm in my late 40's, so I'll be around to see my sons graduation. I adore my son.

Simple.

Good luck mate! You happy, your son looks happy. What could be more important? At least your son could have another citizenship and better chances in life. Call in continual improvement.

[Concerned expat]

In the past 10 years, I have met many English Teachers that make a lot less than 100,000 baht a month, some at 'proper' schools.

Would the money be sufficient to live on anyway?

[FACTOR]

Would the money be sufficient to live on anyway?

That's a good question. How much is sufficient?

[ChiangMaiFalung]

In the past 10 years, I have met many English Teachers that make a lot less than 100,000 baht a month, some at 'proper' schools.

Would the money be sufficient to live on anyway?

Some Teachers are on 20 to 30 K. I do not see that as enough to live on, but I guess that is up to the individual.

I was making the statement about 100 wrt some else saying teachers in "proper schools" make 100 K. Not always so.

[neverdie]

OP, we all try to keep it simple.

The problem is you read too much of TVF and you are confused with the comments coming from different members.

This is not how we live, it's just an attempt to spice some of our time by having an argument, with somebody that we wouldn't have in real life.

If we are still living in this country it means we are happy doing so.

Age, does not have an adverse effect on that, the only difference is that you look at things and situations with a wiser and more experienced mind.

So carry on with your happy life, as we all do.

PS. You had a go at ATF, that was wrong.

He was only agreeing with your comment, don't expect everybody to write an assay agreeing or disagreeing with your OP.

Hey Costas.

I agree with your reply, nice words. But have to disagree with your PS. If one can only write "no comment" why bother ?

Just sayin.

Cheers..... Mal.

Oops, this is embarrassing. I interpreted Mr ATF's "No Comment" as a form of patronising sarcasm; as is the only way I have heard it used.

I contacted him by private message and he explained the context in which he meant it. I have offered a full apology, which he kindly accepted.

So now we all shake hands and move on.

Keep it simple.

Be careful shaking ATF's hand. Check to make sure you still have your wrist watch.......

ps: don't let him up behind you

[Grindting]

Yeah simple. You have a child that most likely won't see his father at his high school graduation. That is simple minded of you nothing more.

As for marriage it is never simple nor is life. Simplifying what is important takes a lot of work but that I will agree is necessary for prolonged happiness.

Being as old as you are, I guess you have already had all of the arguments, difficulties and achievements. Now you are on the down spiral of life so you have less attachment to things. I doubt that is the best role model for an equity relationship. Just not caring anymore to the point you are just happy with any "Thaiwife" and starting a family isn't my idea of something to emulate.

But go on bang your drum how great your marriage is and how great of a person you are to start a family in your twilight years.

I'm in my late 40's, so I'll be around to see my sons graduation. I adore my son.

Simple.

Wish you the best of luck, but you look like you're in your late 60s at best. Perhaps something to be concerned about?

[sipi]

Yeah simple. You have a child that most likely won't see his father at his high school graduation. That is simple minded of you nothing more.

As for marriage it is never simple nor is life. Simplifying what is important takes a lot of work but that I will agree is necessary for prolonged happiness.

Being as old as you are, I guess you have already had all of the arguments, difficulties and achievements. Now you are on the down spiral of life so you have less attachment to things. I doubt that is the best role model for an equity relationship. Just not caring anymore to the point you are just happy with any "Thaiwife" and starting a family isn't my idea of something to emulate.

But go on bang your drum how great your marriage is and how great of a person you are to start a family in your twilight years.

I'm in my late 40's, so I'll be around to see my sons graduation. I adore my son.

Simple.

Wish you the best of luck, but you look like you're in your late 60s at best. Perhaps something to be concerned about?

Thanks. Not at all. My Doctor congratulates me each year when I have a thorough check-up.

[sipi]

Actually Grindting. Some people on these forums are so highly strung they will give themselves a stroke or heart-attack. We have seriously never laughed so much. Funny as....

[sipi]

Yeah simple. You have a child that most likely won't see his father at his high school graduation. That is simple minded of you nothing more.

As for marriage it is never simple nor is life. Simplifying what is important takes a lot of work but that I will agree is necessary for prolonged happiness.

Being as old as you are, I guess you have already had all of the arguments, difficulties and achievements. Now you are on the down spiral of life so you have less attachment to things. I doubt that is the best role model for an equity relationship. Just not caring anymore to the point you are just happy with any "Thaiwife" and starting a family isn't my idea of something to emulate.

But go on bang your drum how great your marriage is and how great of a person you are to start a family in your twilight years.

I'm in my late 40's, so I'll be around to see my sons graduation. I adore my son.

Simple.

Wish you the best of luck, but you look like you're in your late 60s at best. Perhaps something to be concerned about?

Actually Grindting. Some people on these forums are so highly strung; they will give themselves a stroke or heart attack. We have never laughed so hard....

[billd766]

Just out of interest, are you "comfortable" because of what you've had to shell out on paying for a proper education for your boy?

Not sure what a proper education is anymore,

my 3yo boy seems to be doing fine speaking Central/Lanna/Burmese and English.

He's been nowhere near any school yet & he already owns a small farm.

Your 3 year old son ... already owns a small farm? AnotherOneAmerican, is there something else you'd like to share with us?

It is perfectly legal in Thailand (and makes sense) to put the land and property in a childs name.

If the worst case happens and the wife dies then normally the father is the legal guardian of the child and as the land and property is in the childs name the farang is not the owner and the land and property stays in the family. Also unless the Family courts agree the land and property cannot be sold by ANYBODY

[zeichen]

Sipi, I do apologize. I really thought you were much older. Yes, you do look happy, but really your topic has nothing to do with your post. Thai Culture has nothing to do with anything that you have talked about.

Sorry to come across so judgmental but you did say that you were old and I do have a slight bias against men over 60 having children.

Your title doesn't really go with anything that you wrote though. You don't really give any suggestions on what you do specifically just some vague sound bite.

Are you divorced and this is your second marriage or first? I have met quite a few older guys who are on their second marriage and have it much easier because they learn to detach from things but also chose a more submissive younger wife that doesn't challenge them. Is that your secret?

[sipi]

Sipi, I do apologize. I really thought you were much older. Yes, you do look happy, but really your topic has nothing to do with your post. Thai Culture has nothing to do with anything that you have talked about.

Sorry to come across so judgmental but you did say that you were old and I do have a slight bias against men over 60 having children.

Your title doesn't really go with anything that you wrote though. You don't really give any suggestions on what you do specifically just some vague sound bite.

Are you divorced and this is your second marriage or first? I have met quite a few older guys who are on their second marriage and have it much easier because they learn to detach from things but also chose a more submissive younger wife that doesn't challenge them. Is that your secret?

No need to apologize Z, I have a very thick skin. You are entitled to be judgmental, as we all are; within the 'rules' of course.

Yes, I left the topic and OP vague on purpose hoping to flame some healthy debate; but it turned in the wrong direction almost within the first or second post.

As for me. First marriage. We (pardon me for saying this again) kept in simple right from the start.

The reason for posting this topic is because I have seen a lot of confusion creep into relationships (I am talking specifically about inter-racial here for a minute, especially Thai) almost right from the start, possibly with the consequence of ruining what could have turned out as a beautiful relationship; and that was the reason alone. It just saddens me to see this. We really must remember that, as confused as we are about Thai ladies and their customs; they are possibly (and normally) twice as confused about us and ours.

I personally found that by side-lining the majority of distractions (yes some need to be addressed), it actually made our marriage.

Thank you so much for your kind reply. Sorry I didn't open the first post up a bit better. And a shame your last post wasn't the first.

[sipi]

Hey Z. This thread is all but dead, so I will tell you briefly how it came about.

The wife, son and I are play wrestling on the lounge,; as you do after several stiff drinks (except the boy of course). I come up with this brilliant idea of getting a snap and running a brief OP about simplicity.(hence the glazed eyes and vacant look). I'm surprised the photo turned out at all.

So the moral of the story is: Don't mix alcohol and TVF.

Please await my next Topic "How to dip a lavender tea-bag"

Cheers