When it becomes Personal - Posting

[David48]

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How much weight do you give to the actual reputation of the Opening Poster as opposed to the Opening Post itself?

Do you play the Man and not the Ball?

One of the members here, Costos2008 seems to be copping it from all sides.

I like Costos (he just misunderstood sometimes) ... but in this OP, I'm not defending him, not attacking him ... just using him as an example.

Do you read the author of the OP and think crap ... not another one from Member XXXX?

I will admit ... sometimes I do ...

So, do you also give a positive preference to a Member who you like, who has a similar mind set to you?

I will admit ... sometimes I do ...

Just asking what your biases are ...

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[ClutchClark]

My bias is against posters who stalk.

I may have a difference of opinion with a poster on a topic and the next day give him "likes" because I agree with him.

On the opposite end are people with on-going feuds where they stalk a member or simply flame repeatedly.

Costas has some good posts.

[Crazy chef 1]

don't mess with Costas-or he will milk you.or even worse he"ll send his army of gerbils and if this doesn't help "Zuma" will come and then you are in trouble...

[kurtramsbottom]

Anyone that mentions gerbils,badgers or the usual crap that the gang spout is usually skipped.

[Rooo]

Do you really want to discuss another member? Will wait & see how this progresses. As it's not Thailand related, moved to Pub/ Farang discussion.

[WhamBam]

The reputation can make a difference. In, for example those who regularly post red v yellow, humourous posts, or simply posts that slag people off, aside from the serious posters.

What I try to judge is the context of the post itself. Sometimes it is not easy to tell if there is true sarcasm there or not.

Someone like Costas can be quite funny, yet not all people see it.

I don't get put off a poster by the odd posts I do not like because we cannot all agree all the time.

Repetition can get boring from some people in replies they make to some OP's posts. Badgers & milking for example, they do seem to milk that for all they can get & more

[mca]

On the opposite end are people with on-going feuds

Yeah there's a few in the Thai news section which makes reading a lot of the threads an exercise in tedium.

[JDGRUEN]

I don't think it is a good idea to discuss other members by name... didn't know it was allowed...

Anyway... members who want to take jabs at me for no reason, members who quote my post and start assigning a position that they think I am taking - when I am not actually taking that position, or make assumptions about what I am really saying, or semi-stalk me, or are just a wacko, or are a troll, or are a putz, or show a certain disagreeable nature towards me because I am an American, a Texan, and a political Conservative, etc. I stay away from them - if they keep pestering me -- I just put them on IGNORE... it works GREAT... wish I had found the feature sooner.

My favorite ones are those who believe any credentials that I may have and may mention them to support a particular position are in fact false and I am a fraud and they begin berating me. These folks last about one minute - then to the ignore dustbin.

Seems some people who spent a lifetime pushing a pencil and stacking paper on a desk in a drone job just cannot believe a man can have been involved in a diverse set of situations and rich experiences... It is just beyond their grasp to understand it so anyone who lead a rich and adventurous life - must be a fraud - what else could he be? Pathetic mentality.

Then there are the ones who get into Cliquish behavior with others - acting like grade schoolers at age 60... amazing.

[mca]

members who quote my post and start assigning a position that they think I am taking - when I am not actually taking that position, or make assumptions about what I am really saying

Yep.Sort of along the lines of

POSTER 1: I don't feel Abhisit would make a good Prime Minister.

POSTER 2: So what you're saying is you'd rather have a corrupt convicted fugitive on the lam running the country from Dubai with his clone following his orders and an army of armed insurrectionists burning Bangkok to the ground and leading the country to a genocidal civil war you Thaskinista red shirt buffalo supporting buffoon?

POSTER 1: Err no...

TVF. Bringing the strawman argument to a whole new level.

[Sigurris]

Its the pedants who get me. Unfortunately they are usually also the rose tinted brigade for whom Thai's are demi-gods and Thailand a milky paradise. So you have pedancy protected by accusations of racism, superiority complexes and a general humour by pass.

We live in a crazy, wonderful, corrupt, weird country full of strange tastes, thoughts and logic. Whats not to laugh about? Its home for better and worse. But boy, make a statement that can be taken more than one way and you know where the pedants will go.

Only yesterday I was told that better is subjective!!! That was the sum total of the post. A pedant telling me that one persons better is not the same as anothers!!! Does he think I am 5 years old? The whole point of forums is for people to express opinions which will always be subjective. Do I need reminding? Not really.

[Costas2008]

David, thank you very much for giving me the opportunity to express myself and have a rant.

I was accused by certain members that I’m opening too many threads.

I was instructed by certain members to get a life.

I was told by certain members to go back where I came from.

I was verbally abused by certain members not as to the content of my thread but as to my personality.

I’m not the first or the last one to get comments like the above.

But why?

1. Every member has the right to express their thoughts and opinions on TVF, rant on TVF for something they don’t like.

Nobody has set a limit on threads that can be opened. (Don’t worry if it is not to the like of

the administration, it will be locked in no time)

And nobody has obliged anybody to contribute to the thread if they don’t like the content.

After all there are thousands of threads alive to express your thoughts.

2. Members should be concerned about their own lives and not the lives of others.

Nobody can tell me how to conduct my life, I have chosen to live the way I do and I am more than content and happy with the way I am.

3. Again it’s my prerogative where I live and where I stay.

No member has the right to tell me where I should live.

Never bothered anyone so please stop bothering me.

Make decisions for yourselves and not the others.

4. Why so much bitterness and contempt exists between fellow members?

What can anybody achieve by being horrible to somebody else?

I understand that we don’t like everybody in our lives, but what is the point of slagging off another person?

Especially if it has nothing to do with the content of his thread/post, but just a personal dislike.

[David48]

Actually Costas ... and in reference what Rooo writes above ... I'm not referring to any one Poster/Member ... just that you are the one copping it ATM ... so it seemed reasonable to mention your name, because most here know you.

So please Forum Members ... this is not about Costas ... it's about how you perceive a post and the relevance to the Author.

That said ... some excellent replies above ...

[David48]

I don't think it is a good idea to discuss other members by name... didn't know it was allowed...

I'm no expert ... many things are allowed ... it's more how you say it.

Plus, I'm showing the member in a positive light, which does seem to help.

[SoiBiker]

Posters who carry a grudge from one thread to another just make themselves look childish - and by attacking the poster rather than the post, they reveal they have limited debating skills.

Costas just gets it in the neck because he spams the forum with attention-seeking nonsense. You can't seek attention and then complain when it's not the kind you wanted.

[David48]

David, thank you very much for giving me the opportunity to express myself and have a rant.

<snip>

Especially if it has nothing to do with the content of his thread/post, but just a personal dislike.

Mate ... I didn't know you were so angry (on the inside).

Don't let the Forum get to you like that. It's a great place, full of good people.

I was having drinks with 3 of them on Sunday just gone ... had a blast.

[Costas2008]

Actually Costas ... and in reference what Rooo writes above ... I'm not referring to any one Poster/Member ... just that you are the one copping it ATM ... so it seemed reasonable to mention your name, because most here know you.

So please Forum Members ... this is not about Costas ... it's about how you perceive a post and the relevance to the Author.

That said ... some excellent replies above ...

David, I do understand the reason you opened this thread.

But what I wrote does not apply only to me, but also to many other members.

There is a culture between members to be horrible to others.

But why?

This is what you and me and others would like to know.

[pgrahmm]

I look at what the headline is - then who posted.....if the headline does not seem interesting then I pass......it's too easy to think we're doing something vaguely important by perusing TVF and the more threads read for no good reason are minutes I can never relive with the important/real people or take back.....

There is a lot to be learned in many ways from a good many posts...also good to pass on good help/advice/information when possible....

I find some humorous posters & tend to think there will be an interesting giggle/gaffe - hand grenade/land mine along the way.....

I see a lot of one liners that are genuinely funny.....

I really tire of the snipers (one in particular) that just snipe a subject/topic or post for nothing other than an arrogant put down of a preceding innocent poster.....just kicking sand via keyboard invisibility or keyboard masterbation.....hopefully that person doesn't last long.....

[Sigurris]

Of course let us not forget the Elephant in the room. Have a look at my footnote and you will know exactly what I mean.

[sipi]

I always go straight to the post, regardless of the poster (or play the ball rather than the man, as you say).

But strangely enough, the best posts are generally by the same posters (Davis and Costas being 2 of them).

As in sport, the best man has the best balls.

[Tywais]

I don't think it is a good idea to discuss other members by name... didn't know it was allowed...

I'm no expert ... many things are allowed ... it's more how you say it.

Plus, I'm showing the member in a positive light, which does seem to help.

Normally I do not allow a topic to run that is created with focus on an individual member as it is not fair to the member and they will be inclined to defend themselves and start of a war of the words. Regardless if the OP starts in a positive light regarding a member, it will nearly always degrade with the negative side coming up by disgruntled members. We'll just see where this is heading and if it heads where most member centric topics go then it will be closed.

[David48]

Fair Call.

Obviously I made a mistake with the OP mentioning any poster ... I should have used Poster 'X'.

My Bad ...

We will just now have to rely on the intelligence and good nature of the Posters who reply to keep this above board.

I have Faith.

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[geronimo]

Must admit I didn't realise how easy it is to look up someone's old posts.

I used to be a reasonable soccer player years gone by and always tried to play the ball. It should all be taken in good humour, as it is intended.

[AYJAYDEE]

just read it and wonder if he is a whiner or a troll

[David48]

just read it and wonder if he is a whiner or a troll

Fair point, and often correct.

Could it be though that there are more options?

I like to post in the General Forum when appropriate and hopefully I fall outside the classifications mentioned above most times?

Mind you ... an occasional whinge is par for course ... helps me let off some steam!

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[thailiketoo]

I don't understand why ad hominum posting or name calling or insulting posts are allowed. The first time a poster starts calling another names (like in kindergarten) I think the post should be removed regardless how cute the insult is or how much of a good old boy the insulting poster is.

There is a group of posters x, xx, and xxx who like each others posts almost each and every time. I think that's silly. I assume it's a mate thing and I don't get it because I'm from a country that doesn't require every male to have mates.

I think what I wrote above is OK because I didn't attack anyone personally. However I can see some people would construe it as an insult. In this instance I think it's on topic.

The political forum (Thai news) has been totally taken over by ad hominum posters in my opinion and I wonder that any person without an agenda (astroturfers) could post there. But then again it seems to have it's own rules and I assume the OP is not discussing that forum.

[David48]

^^ I do understand what you imply ... but ...

If it was reduced to an information style Forum, much of the Fun and Jocularity would be lost and it would become a dry place.

Reducing the posting to the lowest common denominator ... sort of like a PC forum.

Isn't value is a bit of fun? some gentle ribbing between folk. Sure, I know it gets out of hand occasionally ... but that's what the Mods do well ... removing what is OTT.

Tolerance is a strong drink ... but well worth taking a swig from that bottle occasionally.

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[SoiBiker]

Fun and jocularity is great - but it's possible to have fun discussing the topic at hand.

If you don't like the kind of opinions someone expresses, then say why you disagree and counter them with your own opinion, rather than just attack the person who expressed them.

[thailiketoo]

^^ I do understand what you imply ... but ...

If it was reduced to an information style Forum, much of the Fun and Jocularity would be lost and it would become a dry place.

Reducing the posting to the lowest common denominator ... sort of like a PC forum.

Isn't value is a bit of fun? some gentle ribbing between folk. Sure, I know it gets out of hand occasionally ... but that's what the Mods do well ... removing what is OTT.

Tolerance is a strong drink ... but well worth taking a swig from that bottle occasionally.

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That's where I have a problem, the gentle ribbing. In some pubs what is considered gentle ribbing I would pull out a pistol and shoot the guy in the head. Being called a C*** I don't think is funny. Or other words that are highly demeaning in my culture. Since we have people from many cultures here I'm of the opinion that insulting, name calling, (gentle ribbing as you call it) should be banned because we all can't be expected to behave like a drunk (****) and think it's funny.

See what I'm saying? The insulting culture that you think is humorous I don't. Don Rickles is an American comic that insults people. I think he appeals to the lowest rung of society and would never listen to him or attend a celebrity roast as I think they are low class and tasteless.

There are pubs to frequent if one wants to bash other nationalities or people. I don't think it has a place in an open forum where one encounters people from many different cultures and nationalities.

Insults or gentle ribbing lead to gentile or not so gentile flame wars and in my way of thinking are a disruptive to the forum.

Edited October 10, 2014 by thailiketoo

[mca]

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Why so much bitterness and contempt exists between fellow members?

Because in my extremely humble opinion a number of them are stuck in a dire relationship or marriage where misunderstandings, conversations in pidgin English, sullen day long silences and a complete lack of anything in common with their partner are the order of the day. They turn their vehemence to folks on TVF as a way to let of steam rather than man up and admit the complete **** up they've made of their life.

[AYJAYDEE]

^^ I do understand what you imply ... but ...

If it was reduced to an information style Forum, much of the Fun and Jocularity would be lost and it would become a dry place.

Reducing the posting to the lowest common denominator ... sort of like a PC forum.

Isn't value is a bit of fun? some gentle ribbing between folk. Sure, I know it gets out of hand occasionally ... but that's what the Mods do well ... removing what is OTT.

Tolerance is a strong drink ... but well worth taking a swig from that bottle occasionally.

.

That's where I have a problem, the gentle ribbing. In some pubs what is considered gentle ribbing I would pull out a pistol and shoot the guy in the head. Being called a C*** I don't think is funny. Or other words that are highly demeaning in my culture. Since we have people from many cultures here I'm of the opinion that insulting, name calling, (gentle ribbing as you call it) should be banned because we all can't be expected to behave like a drunk (****) and think it's funny.

See what I'm saying? The insulting culture that you think is humorous I don't. Don Rickles is an American comic that insults people. I think he appeals to the lowest rung of society and would never listen to him or attend a celebrity roast as I think they are low class and tasteless.

There are pubs to frequent if one wants to bash other nationalities or people. I don't think it has a place in an open forum where one encounters people from many different cultures and nationalities.

Insults or gentle ribbing lead to gentile or not so gentile flame wars and in my way of thinking are a disruptive to the forum.

a gunshot is the answer to so many things in your country! incredible.