How much info about you, do you freely divulge to your students?

[new2here]

This question is more targeted at the University level teachers- but not to say it couldn't or wouldn't also apply to lower level educational situations (like M3's to M6's)

I teach a newly created all-English program explicitly geared to students who want to get into customer-facing airline careers; its mostly geared to cabin crew positions, but can also be ground-based customer service positions as well.

Demographically speaking my I've got about 105 total students, I suspect due to the programs focus, they are mostly female (92 of the 105).

When I was first hired, the Dean and I had a fairly open and honest discussion about what her expectations were, what I wanted or needed and some basic housekeeping rules if you will.

She was very candid, by saying that a good percentage of my students will be, by relative standards, attractive. That said, she reiterated that she doesn't condone physical, sexual or other types of relationships between current instructors and current students.

I remember one of her quotes quite well.. She said with a great deal of laughter "look, you're a man. I get that, so, I'm not saying you can't or won't look... but please.. for your sake and mine, please don't touch"

However... She also was very clear in that she was ok with, and even expected and encouraged me to develop a friendly and personal rapport with them.

She said (and I agree with) the more they know about you, your life, who you are, what you do and like to do outside of the classroom, the more they'll trust you. The more they know you aren't all that different from them, the less of a "barrier" there will be in place the both of you to overcome.

So, the question is how much do you share about your life outside the classroom with your students?

Just in case the commentary goes that way, I'll address one thing.. I have zero expectation, goal or desire to become "involved with" one of my students.. I just don't see them that way.. Yes, they're almost all attractive.. For sure. But to me, I see them as like my baby sister or even my daughter.

[slipperywhenbrett]

I created a second Facebook page for my students (M5) to view. This is hardly an original idea, but it has worked out well for me. I'm 24, so I knew that students would eventually would go looking for my profile. And when they did, there it was. I already had laid out photos, likes, etc. that I wanted them to see. It is also a way to become available to them after hours.

Edited October 12, 2014 by slipperywhenbrett

[poostick]

I work with Prathom and have been asked a few times for my Facebook. I would never give them this as there is some strange and inappropriate stuff on there. I have thought about the second FB page for students but never got round to doing it.

[zeichen]

"However... She also was very clear in that she was ok with, and even expected and encouraged me to develop a friendly and personal rapport with them.

She said (and I agree with) the more they know about you, your life, who you are, what you do and like to do outside of the classroom, the more they'll trust you. The more they know you aren't all that different from them, the less of a "barrier" there will be in place the both of you to overcome."

I don't agree with this at all. rapport building is more about them and less about you.

First of all, your lessons should be focused and organized so that the minimal time you have is focused on the students and not you. I typically spend the first class of each term with introductions. I tell how long I have lived here, my educational/teaching background, my publications that are related to the class. I usually share about my family, mostly my daughter because she is the biggest part of my life. But sometimes I even feel that is too much and not really necessary. After that first lesson the rest of the term shouldn't have anything to do with you. The rapport you build should be about their learning, focus in the class and comfort. How much Thai food you eat, how much you love Buddhism, Thai culture, etc. shouldn't be apart of your lessons unless of course it is about your lesson.

The class can be lighthearted and fun without the need to build personal relationships.

If a boss has to state that teachers shouldn't date students, shows that they have had problems in the past. Even former students should be off limits.

"Yes, they're almost all attractive.." Though this was in the justification line. The language does show some concern.

To be honest, I am only 40 but I have never found any of my college students "attractive". I think that the younger teachers in their mid 20's sometimes have the most problem with this because they don't see the problem as the age gap is so slight. However it isn't really about age and more about classroom dynamics and professionalism.

Your question in general shows your lack of experience as a teacher, but everyone has to start somewhere. If you actually feel that you are in trouble of forming strong relationships that may lead to romantic ones in the future, quit the job.

I don't eat with students at the canteen, I don't hang with them in the lobby. I am polite to them when passing, but they are not my friends and I don't wish them to be. I have helped them with their spirit week and have done nice things for them when they won. My post graduate students and adult students from management, I might share more with but even then I am not looking to make new friends.

Caring about the students is fine. I actually know a lot about my students; their skills, habits, and personalities, it helps build the strategies in the classroom to facilitate learning. Them knowing about us isn't as important.

There are 1000's of stories out there. Some have nice endings where they get married and live happily ever after, some that end with the teacher being fired.

Keep your personal and professional life separate and you won't have any problems.

Having a second facebook would be alright but there is a social media site for teaching called Edmodo which is awesome. It is an exceptional tool. Not only can you post appropriate photos, you can organize the page for each separate class with a password. They can have discussions with each other and also be updated on tests, quizzes. There are links to books and other things.

Two relatively new posters have totally inappropriate usernames for teachers and for discussing in an educational forum so I would take anything they say with reservation.

[poostick]

Two relatively new posters have totally inappropriate usernames for teachers and for discussing in an educational forum so I would take anything they say with reservation.....Oh dear, I am so not worthy.

[new2here]

I created a second Facebook page for my students (M5) to view. This is hardly an original idea, but it has worked out well for me. I'm 24, so I knew that students would eventually would go looking for my profile. And when they did, there it was. I already had laid out photos, likes, etc. that I wanted them to see. It is also a way to become available to them after hours.

Thanks for the idea... I've mulled that one a few times as well... I'm not a huge FB user, but they very much are, so that might be a good media choice.

[new2here]

I work with Prathom and have been asked a few times for my Facebook. I would never give them this as there is some strange and inappropriate stuff on there. I have thought about the second FB page for students but never got round to doing it.

I agree that you've got to be careful that whatever you post be appropriate given who you are and what role you occupy, in line with what you want to share.

I don't post stuff that I would be afraid (ashamed or otherwise) for someone else to see, so to that end the FB page seems like a good idea. Thanks!

[new2here]

"However... She also was very clear in that she was ok with, and even expected and encouraged me to develop a friendly and personal rapport with them.

She said (and I agree with) the more they know about you, your life, who you are, what you do and like to do outside of the classroom, the more they'll trust you. The more they know you aren't all that different from them, the less of a "barrier" there will be in place the both of you to overcome."

I don't agree with this at all. rapport building is more about them and less about you.

First of all, your lessons should be focused and organized so that the minimal time you have is focused on the students and not you. I typically spend the first class of each term with introductions. I tell how long I have lived here, my educational/teaching background, my publications that are related to the class. I usually share about my family, mostly my daughter because she is the biggest part of my life. But sometimes I even feel that is too much and not really necessary. After that first lesson the rest of the term shouldn't have anything to do with you. The rapport you build should be about their learning, focus in the class and comfort. How much Thai food you eat, how much you love Buddhism, Thai culture, etc. shouldn't be apart of your lessons unless of course it is about your lesson.

The class can be lighthearted and fun without the need to build personal relationships.

If a boss has to state that teachers shouldn't date students, shows that they have had problems in the past. Even former students should be off limits.

"Yes, they're almost all attractive.." Though this was in the justification line. The language does show some concern.

To be honest, I am only 40 but I have never found any of my college students "attractive". I think that the younger teachers in their mid 20's sometimes have the most problem with this because they don't see the problem as the age gap is so slight. However it isn't really about age and more about classroom dynamics and professionalism.

Your question in general shows your lack of experience as a teacher, but everyone has to start somewhere. If you actually feel that you are in trouble of forming strong relationships that may lead to romantic ones in the future, quit the job.

I don't eat with students at the canteen, I don't hang with them in the lobby. I am polite to them when passing, but they are not my friends and I don't wish them to be. I have helped them with their spirit week and have done nice things for them when they won. My post graduate students and adult students from management, I might share more with but even then I am not looking to make new friends.

Caring about the students is fine. I actually know a lot about my students; their skills, habits, and personalities, it helps build the strategies in the classroom to facilitate learning. Them knowing about us isn't as important.

There are 1000's of stories out there. Some have nice endings where they get married and live happily ever after, some that end with the teacher being fired.

Keep your personal and professional life separate and you won't have any problems.

Having a second facebook would be alright but there is a social media site for teaching called Edmodo which is awesome. It is an exceptional tool. Not only can you post appropriate photos, you can organize the page for each separate class with a password. They can have discussions with each other and also be updated on tests, quizzes. There are links to books and other things.

Two relatively new posters have totally inappropriate usernames for teachers and for discussing in an educational forum so I would take anything they say with reservation.

While my opinion and viewpoints appear to be quite different than yours, I appreciate your feedback on my question. I take all replies in, regardless of any perceived newness or not.

[Scott]

As Thaivisa comes close to have 150,000 members, it becomes difficult to come up with an 'appropriate' username, whatever that means.

I would not generally discount a comment because of the username.

[SlyAnimal]

It's important to always keep the Student/Teacher relationship, in much the same way as managers need to maintain the Manager/Employee relationship. So try to not become friends with your students, not because you might "touch" them, since whether you do or don't, that's actually inconsequential, but for two main reasons:

1/ If you become "friends" with the students, they'll see you as a friend not their teacher, which makes teaching them more difficult.

2/ If people see you with another student outside of class, even if nothing happens, they might "think" that something has happened. Particularly if that student then receives a good grade. This could then lead to the other students losing respect for you, or with you even being fired (or not having your contract renewed) if staff got wind of the rumours.

For me it's easier to keep that student/teacher relationship, as I was teaching at a high school, rather than a university. I didn't initially intend on sharing my facebook profile etc with the students, however I accepted requests from some of the teachers, and then the students (via the Thai teachers' profiles) found my fb profile and I was inundated with requests. I initially ignored them, but after a while it just became easier to accept them rather than ignore them (otherwise I had to check each one to confirm they weren't one of the Thai teachers or one of my Thai friends).

I'll only get a message maybe 2-3 times a week, but my students don't usually say much, occasionally ask about homework/grades etc, but usually the conversations don't go much further than hello, as they are too shy (Although I'm happy to reply back to them if it helps their English, and occasionally reply back in Thai if I feel like practising my Thai).

Also tidy up your facebook account etc, to remove any pictures etc which would be inappropriate for the students to see their teacher doing, since they will eventually find your profile, whether you want them to or not. As you are a teacher, and so you're also a role model for good behaviour etc, thus you should try to ensure all of your pictures are ones you wouldn't mind showing your boss (Your boss & colleagues might also add you on fb, everyone loves fb in Thailand lol). A second profile is a good idea, I wish I'd thought of that 3-4 years ago lol.

Edit: Oh, although if you're married, or are in an obviously steady relationship (e.g. living with your partner), then you don't need to worry as much about rumours, as you've got a certain level of protection. But be careful regardless, as rumours are less likely, but could be more dangerous if anyone were to believe them.

[WonnabeBiker]

I found that them knowing someone better makes it easier for them to open up and speak.

That's why I created a Facebook.

The jury is still out whether that was a mistake.

Am being added as family member etc., but what the heck. am trying to put the customers first. They pay my salary (ultimately, if not literally).

[Card]

"I just don't see them that way.. Yes, they're almost all attractive.. For sure. But to me, I see them as like my baby sister or even my daughter."

As a former uni teacher I know exactly what you mean. However, the tensions/temptations can come along more strongly if one or more of them, a very attractive one, come on strong to you, rather than the other way around. that's when the real test begins and it may be a rare event but with 100 students at a time is bound to come along at some stage. You need to remain strong and think only of the negative consequences. I used to completely ignore the rare attention unless it got out of hand. But you may want to just enjoy the flirtation. i didn't.

[howg]

I'm 62 yrs old, male, and teach within a corporate context, where there is a great divide between management and staff. My job is to improve overall Eng. skills. The company I work for has traditionally supported the idea that managers should keep their distance from staff (in terms of personal relationships [non-sexual]), which has resulted in the worst staff-management atmosphere I have ever encountered. My students are mid 20s to early 30s, mostly female.

As for me, I am completely honest & open with my students and get as close to them as possible, which has resulted in the best teacher (manager) - staff relations in the history of the company. Last week, I brought in my old photo albums with pictures of me going all the way back... I talk to them no differently than I do with anyone else, and their response has been fantastic.

When I first began the class, I could not get anyone to say a word... it was like pulling teeth.

Now I can't get them to shut up.

When I first started, I stood up in front of the class and talked/acted like a teacher should.

Now I sit among them and just keep things flowing... they are all fully engaged and appear to very much enjoy the activity (as do I).

The feedback I have received from senior management has also been fantastic, and they are currently re-evaluating their entire approach to staff-management relations to improve the rather negative atmosphere that currently exists.

Each to his own, I guess. Clearly, others who have posted here disagree with this approach. But this has been my experience both in my professional and personal life here in Thailand. The main problem I have encountered is actually from mid-level managers who resent my success.

Office politics... what to do?

Also, in my experience with Thais in general, honestly is not only valued and appreciated, it's the very first thing they look for (for good reason, as we all know). Whenever I meet my wife's family or friends, it's the very first thing they scrutinize, (and they do scrutinize), and then they invariably turn to my wife and give their verdict... Jai dee - you chose well.

I also seldom encounter the problems typically expressed here in the TV forum.

My life in Thailand has not been 100% problem-free in this regard, but such negative encounters have been few and far between.

In fact, the biggest problems I have encountered to date have been with other expats... but that's another story entirely.

Anyhoo, for what it's worth, this has been my experience to date.

I wish you good luck in your new job, and suggest that you just be yourself.

[Scott]

Personally, I share very little with the students and they don't seem to be too interested other than general things, like, where I come from, how old am I, do I have any children. Even those questions usually take a back seat to the important things like, do I like football, do I like hip-hop, favorite movie, actor etc., etc..

I will answer those questions, but I still don't volunteer too much information. I am more interested in hearing what they like and getting them to talk.

I have a facebook account but I do not share it with any current students, I have former students--some now married with kids who are facebook friends, but I would just as soon not be FB friends with current students. Also, I am not a big fan of FB.

[new2here]

It's important to always keep the Student/Teacher relationship, in much the same way as managers need to maintain the Manager/Employee relationship. So try to not become friends with your students, not because you might "touch" them, since whether you do or don't, that's actually inconsequential, but for two main reasons:

1/ If you become "friends" with the students, they'll see you as a friend not their teacher, which makes teaching them more difficult.

2/ If people see you with another student outside of class, even if nothing happens, they might "think" that something has happened. Particularly if that student then receives a good grade. This could then lead to the other students losing respect for you, or with you even being fired (or not having your contract renewed) if staff got wind of the rumours.

For me it's easier to keep that student/teacher relationship, as I was teaching at a high school, rather than a university. I didn't initially intend on sharing my facebook profile etc with the students, however I accepted requests from some of the teachers, and then the students (via the Thai teachers' profiles) found my fb profile and I was inundated with requests. I initially ignored them, but after a while it just became easier to accept them rather than ignore them (otherwise I had to check each one to confirm they weren't one of the Thai teachers or one of my Thai friends).

I'll only get a message maybe 2-3 times a week, but my students don't usually say much, occasionally ask about homework/grades etc, but usually the conversations don't go much further than hello, as they are too shy (Although I'm happy to reply back to them if it helps their English, and occasionally reply back in Thai if I feel like practising my Thai).

Also tidy up your facebook account etc, to remove any pictures etc which would be inappropriate for the students to see their teacher doing, since they will eventually find your profile, whether you want them to or not. As you are a teacher, and so you're also a role model for good behaviour etc, thus you should try to ensure all of your pictures are ones you wouldn't mind showing your boss (Your boss & colleagues might also add you on fb, everyone loves fb in Thailand lol). A second profile is a good idea, I wish I'd thought of that 3-4 years ago lol.

Edit: Oh, although if you're married, or are in an obviously steady relationship (e.g. living with your partner), then you don't need to worry as much about rumours, as you've got a certain level of protection. But be careful regardless, as rumours are less likely, but could be more dangerous if anyone were to believe them.

Your two points are (very) well taken

I try (and think) that I maintain an open and transparent grading system. I am well aware and agree that even an incorrect perception of bias; be that good or bad; is detrimental to everyone, myself included.

So I try my utmost to insure that everyone get the same shake.

As to being "friends". I too agree.. I would prefer to call is "I shouldn't be their friend" as I do agree that it can cloud the relationship. But I do want to be friendLY ... the trick is (as I see it) is how to be seen and treated as friendLY and not necessarily friendS.

Your comments are well taken, thank you.

[new2here]

Personally, I share very little with the students and they don't seem to be too interested other than general things, like, where I come from, how old am I, do I have any children. Even those questions usually take a back seat to the important things like, do I like football, do I like hip-hop, favorite movie, actor etc., etc..

I will answer those questions, but I still don't volunteer too much information. I am more interested in hearing what they like and getting them to talk.

I have a facebook account but I do not share it with any current students, I have former students--some now married with kids who are facebook friends, but I would just as soon not be FB friends with current students. Also, I am not a big fan of FB.

To my surprise (initially shock) my students took a GREAT deal of (apparent) interest in me.

My first class session - ol facilitated by the program manager and associate Dean - consisted of what I'd call fairly personal and in depth questions.

Examples might be:

Q: do you have any brothers or sisters?

A: No.

Q: why not?

A: I would suggest you contact my mother. She would be able to give a more authoritative answer on that.

Q: are you gay?

A: no

Q: are you sure

A: yes. I have double checked this answer.

Scott, i do agree that the value isn't in them knowing me, but in me knowing them.. But I recognize that it seems to be more of a two-way street.

I use the "about me" as a turn around set-up for "what about you" kinds of discussions.

The one thing with my class is that it does cover a lot of social interaction. Things like how do you address someone of "rank" while both of you are in an off duty status? Or how do you urgently wake someone (by touch) who is asleep and doesn't respond to any verbal attempts?

So for me, breaking the ice quickly became a vital thing.

Your comments are very germane and well taken. Thanks.

[new2here]

"I just don't see them that way.. Yes, they're almost all attractive.. For sure. But to me, I see them as like my baby sister or even my daughter."

As a former uni teacher I know exactly what you mean. However, the tensions/temptations can come along more strongly if one or more of them, a very attractive one, come on strong to you, rather than the other way around. that's when the real test begins and it may be a rare event but with 100 students at a time is bound to come along at some stage. You need to remain strong and think only of the negative consequences. I used to completely ignore the rare attention unless it got out of hand. But you may want to just enjoy the flirtation. i didn't.

Totally agree and see your point.

To that end, I was very appreciative of the Dean and her sit down.. Which was quite candid and honest.

I did a "gut check" before I accepted the position and made the internal commitment that certain just won't happen; they're just not I the cards.

I understand the Dean also had a somewhat similar conversation wth the classes before my first day.. So the stage was set.

[lostinisaan]

"However... She also was very clear in that she was ok with, and even expected and encouraged me to develop a friendly and personal rapport with them.

She said (and I agree with) the more they know about you, your life, who you are, what you do and like to do outside of the classroom, the more they'll trust you. The more they know you aren't all that different from them, the less of a "barrier" there will be in place the both of you to overcome."

I don't agree with this at all. rapport building is more about them and less about you.

First of all, your lessons should be focused and organized so that the minimal time you have is focused on the students and not you. I typically spend the first class of each term with introductions. I tell how long I have lived here, my educational/teaching background, my publications that are related to the class. I usually share about my family, mostly my daughter because she is the biggest part of my life. But sometimes I even feel that is too much and not really necessary. After that first lesson the rest of the term shouldn't have anything to do with you. The rapport you build should be about their learning, focus in the class and comfort. How much Thai food you eat, how much you love Buddhism, Thai culture, etc. shouldn't be apart of your lessons unless of course it is about your lesson.

The class can be lighthearted and fun without the need to build personal relationships.

If a boss has to state that teachers shouldn't date students, shows that they have had problems in the past. Even former students should be off limits.

"Yes, they're almost all attractive.." Though this was in the justification line. The language does show some concern.

To be honest, I am only 40 but I have never found any of my college students "attractive". I think that the younger teachers in their mid 20's sometimes have the most problem with this because they don't see the problem as the age gap is so slight. However it isn't really about age and more about classroom dynamics and professionalism.

Your question in general shows your lack of experience as a teacher, but everyone has to start somewhere. If you actually feel that you are in trouble of forming strong relationships that may lead to romantic ones in the future, quit the job.

I don't eat with students at the canteen, I don't hang with them in the lobby. I am polite to them when passing, but they are not my friends and I don't wish them to be. I have helped them with their spirit week and have done nice things for them when they won. My post graduate students and adult students from management, I might share more with but even then I am not looking to make new friends.

Caring about the students is fine. I actually know a lot about my students; their skills, habits, and personalities, it helps build the strategies in the classroom to facilitate learning. Them knowing about us isn't as important.

There are 1000's of stories out there. Some have nice endings where they get married and live happily ever after, some that end with the teacher being fired.

Keep your personal and professional life separate and you won't have any problems.

Having a second facebook would be alright but there is a social media site for teaching called Edmodo which is awesome. It is an exceptional tool. Not only can you post appropriate photos, you can organize the page for each separate class with a password. They can have discussions with each other and also be updated on tests, quizzes. There are links to books and other things.

Two relatively new posters have totally inappropriate usernames for teachers and for discussing in an educational forum so I would take anything they say with reservation.

To be honest, I am only 40 but I have never found any of my college students "attractive". I think that the younger teachers in their mid 20's sometimes have the most problem with this because they don't see the problem as the age gap is so slight.

Is it possible that you're teaching roman catholic nuns?

Does that even have something to do with your age? I'm 54 and my eyes "prefer" to see Thai university students, as Roman Catholic nuns seem to be less attractive in my eyes......

But I already know that I'm wrong and "researches" showing that Thai university students have the most attractive ( not even using the word "sexy" now) school uniforms, etc.., are also completely wrong. .

​And the posters with their inadequate usernames should really be ashamed.

Edited October 13, 2014 by lostinisaan

[lostinisaan]

I remember one of her quotes quite well.. She said with a great deal of laughter "look, you're a man. I get that, so, I'm not saying you can't or won't look... but please.. for your sake and mine, please don't touch"

She seems to be a good boss to let you know that you can "get your appetite at school, but you'll have to eat at home".

Edited October 13, 2014 by lostinisaan

[smotherb]

Having taught at university for over twenty years, undergraduate and graduate levels; I have always been expected to share my bio-data with the students. However, the expected bio-data centered around my academic and professional experience, my degrees, honor societies, publications, professional organizations, teaching philosophy, and to a lesser extent, my family and hobbies. Beyond that, you are on your own. When teaching undergraduate courses, I was more the reserved professor, helping and encouraging wherever possible, but maintaining a degree of separation; with my graduate students, I was more of a mentor and friend, often including them in my professional network, and even interacted socially on special occasions. Of course, these were MBA students, usually in their thirties.

As far as fraternizing with the students or with someone within your employ; maintaining a professional relationship is recommended. However, I violated that trust with the woman who is my wife of 36 years.

[gyrosman]

Hi, wish I had such a job but my 28 years in aviation was on the technical side instructing airline customers and mixing my personal experience into the lesson.

As for sharing your personal history with your class is a BIG NO NO. because by the time what you share filters back to others ( in hundreds of versions) and company feedback to HR it can cause problems. When I was teaching here M2, M3, M4, M5, M6 I expose them to the positive and NEGATIVE use of mass media which includes FACEBOOK.

Now, your instructing students into a world of high tech and safety and dealing with passengers. They will experience terror from mechanical problems, terrorist onboard, football matches rivals, drunks, etc.. My advise is to stage these situation in the mock up cabin you have if not use the class room. Don't forget medical emergency in the cabin, stuck on the tarmack no air-con, toiliets blocked, no water.

These are stresses they will face, their focus if prsented correctly with divert them from seeking personal inside information on you but rather your professional level to deliver a proper training situation. They will see your professional side and your capabilites to imerse them in their subject matter. You must prepare them also to a FAR 145 level of training if they will fly internationally.

And because most flight attendents are atractive, your biggest problem will be their EGOS among themselves, thinking impressing the instructor but the reality is they are embarking on an important job learning about CRM; Cabin Resource Management.

Log onto the FAA site and download data about their career and show them the real world. Most ASIA'S haven't even flown on a aircraft.

You hiring?

[glcdc]

There is alot of attention directed to this post..remember those that can't do teach; those that can't teach teach gym..

You can do whatever you want, anytime, why are you so worried about what anyone else thinks; just be you and tell your boss to mind her own damn business. If your choices interfere with the schools reputation or your ability to do your job the quit or you'll be fired...

[iamariva1957]

As a teacher, of any subject, the focus should always be on your students and not you. So them knowing more than the basics about you is both immaterial and not required. Yes, you have to earn their respect as the teacher, but this does not mean that they have to or even should know all your details. For it is your ability to teach that is more to the point and what they need you to be able to do.

The conversation with the principle was questionable. Actually I would have stopped her in mid sentence and told her that no one was going to go down that road and just because you are Man does not equal sleeping with your students. Actually I would have found that to be rather insulting.

So share the basics. Share your Bio as it pertains to your qualifications to be someone's teacher and stand there at the front of the class. Share your experiences as they pertain to the subject matter you are teaching. But to give them information on how many times you have been married, where you live, your family history (besides the basics, like I have "3 brothers", and where I am from, etc), what your goals are (other than for the class itself), why you have come there to teach in the first place, your desire for a love/social life goes beyond what is needed to be an effective teacher and places you in a very questionable position that can become quite complicated... and not in a good way!

Sure, give them your email address so that they can contact you regarding class materials. But your phone number is yours and should not be needed to be given to your students, unless you are playing the role of 'Great Savior'. But remember that you are not their parent, but their teacher. Also be aware that though your intentions might be honorable, it is a fact that anything can be seen as being questionable through the eyes of someone else! Remember that! I have known many teachers that have been charged with things simply because they tried to help a student, but that what they did was seen as something else all together.

Teaching is a calling for the most part. It is not easy and does not come with any medals. As a teacher you will always have your favorite students and those that you know will not make it in the long run (no matter how hard you try). But as a teacher you must be able to keep yourself as private as possible, but without it looking like that is what you are doing. You are simply their teacher. That is it. They do not have to know what your favorite color is or whether or not you put your pants on one leg at a time. Be 'personable' ... yes. But do not be personal!

[utalkin2me]

If I was opening up a business, I would follow cues from corporate America because that is what works.

Likewise, if teaching at a university I would follow cues from university teachers. From my remembrance, they did not say even a thing about themselves. I certainly would not pat attention to anything a Thai person told me, unless you feel like going backwards.

Edited October 13, 2014 by utalkin2me

[new2here]

I remember one of her quotes quite well.. She said with a great deal of laughter "look, you're a man. I get that, so, I'm not saying you can't or won't look... but please.. for your sake and mine, please don't touch"

She seems to be a good boss to let you know that you can "get your appetite at school, but you'll have to eat at home".

I'd call the Dean a realist of you will.. I think she's speaking from a real world point of view.. She was clear about where the lines were, but she was also quite candid about what may occur that's not over the line.

Did they have trouble in the past? Aa my course is a new program, there's no history to draw from. However what I can grasp is that overall her experiences with foreign staff have been mostly positive, but again, being a realist, she also fairly addressed what would get someone into trouble.

Thanks for your insight here, most appreciated.

[new2here]

Having taught at university for over twenty years, undergraduate and graduate levels; I have always been expected to share my bio-data with the students. However, the expected bio-data centered around my academic and professional experience, my degrees, honor societies, publications, professional organizations, teaching philosophy, and to a lesser extent, my family and hobbies. Beyond that, you are on your own. When teaching undergraduate courses, I was more the reserved professor, helping and encouraging wherever possible, but maintaining a degree of separation; with my graduate students, I was more of a mentor and friend, often including them in my professional network, and even interacted socially on special occasions. Of course, these were MBA students, usually in their thirties.

As far as fraternizing with the students or with someone within your employ; maintaining a professional relationship is recommended. However, I violated that trust with the woman who is my wife of 36 years.

Being the "reserved" one is what I initially had in mind, however I kind of let the Dean set the tone of you will ..

My logic is that essentially she is my direct boss and while it is my class, I take direction from her.

I can see both good as bad with both sides, and think there's something to be gained from each.. That's why I'm looking to see what others position and past experiences have been.

Thanks for sharing.

[new2here]

Hi, wish I had such a job but my 28 years in aviation was on the technical side instructing airline customers and mixing my personal experience into the lesson.

As for sharing your personal history with your class is a BIG NO NO. because by the time what you share filters back to others ( in hundreds of versions) and company feedback to HR it can cause problems. When I was teaching here M2, M3, M4, M5, M6 I expose them to the positive and NEGATIVE use of mass media which includes FACEBOOK.

Now, your instructing students into a world of high tech and safety and dealing with passengers. They will experience terror from mechanical problems, terrorist onboard, football matches rivals, drunks, etc.. My advise is to stage these situation in the mock up cabin you have if not use the class room. Don't forget medical emergency in the cabin, stuck on the tarmack no air-con, toiliets blocked, no water.

These are stresses they will face, their focus if prsented correctly with divert them from seeking personal inside information on you but rather your professional level to deliver a proper training situation. They will see your professional side and your capabilites to imerse them in their subject matter. You must prepare them also to a FAR 145 level of training if they will fly internationally.

And because most flight attendents are atractive, your biggest problem will be their EGOS among themselves, thinking impressing the instructor but the reality is they are embarking on an important job learning about CRM; Cabin Resource Management.

Log onto the FAA site and download data about their career and show them the real world. Most ASIA'S haven't even flown on a aircraft.

You hiring?

I agree.. My course is designed ton cover CRM; which relatively speaking is a new(er) industry concept as well as the fundamentals of both 121/5 and 129 flying .

I will have an assistant help me for a few weeks when we cover the Thai specifics as set forth under DCA language.

Truth be told, it was the carriers themselves who initially approached the university asking them about designing a program that produced the type of graduates they are after, and the skill set they were expecting.

There's not much overall demand for crew in the 135 space, it mostly addresses common carrier movements.

We do have live demos, using several carriers cabin mock ups as well (Thai is not the only carrier to such facilities available, though they are the largest)

Thanks for your insight. I have pulled some data from the FAA site as well as JAA (Japan) and EASA.

[new2here]

There is alot of attention directed to this post..remember those that can't do teach; those that can't teach teach gym..

You can do whatever you want, anytime, why are you so worried about what anyone else thinks; just be you and tell your boss to mind her own damn business. If your choices interfere with the schools reputation or your ability to do your job the quit or you'll be fired...

I see you point about being me. I don't however agree with the balance.

As this is a new program. I am and did look to the Dean to set the tone. It is after all her program.

Yes, my class, but also yes, her program. So I am asking to see what others have done to balance those two possibly competing interests.

Warmest regards

[mikecat]

I'm 62 yrs old, male, and teach within a corporate context, where there is a great divide between management and staff. My job is to improve overall Eng. skills. The company I work for has traditionally supported the idea that managers should keep their distance from staff (in terms of personal relationships [non-sexual]), which has resulted in the worst staff-management atmosphere I have ever encountered. My students are mid 20s to early 30s, mostly female.

As for me, I am completely honest & open with my students and get as close to them as possible, which has resulted in the best teacher (manager) - staff relations in the history of the company. Last week, I brought in my old photo albums with pictures of me going all the way back... I talk to them no differently than I do with anyone else, and their response has been fantastic.

When I first began the class, I could not get anyone to say a word... it was like pulling teeth.

Now I can't get them to shut up.

When I first started, I stood up in front of the class and talked/acted like a teacher should.

Now I sit among them and just keep things flowing... they are all fully engaged and appear to very much enjoy the activity (as do I).

The feedback I have received from senior management has also been fantastic, and they are currently re-evaluating their entire approach to staff-management relations to improve the rather negative atmosphere that currently exists.

Each to his own, I guess. Clearly, others who have posted here disagree with this approach. But this has been my experience both in my professional and personal life here in Thailand. The main problem I have encountered is actually from mid-level managers who resent my success.

Office politics... what to do?

Also, in my experience with Thais in general, honestly is not only valued and appreciated, it's the very first thing they look for (for good reason, as we all know). Whenever I meet my wife's family or friends, it's the very first thing they scrutinize, (and they do scrutinize), and then they invariably turn to my wife and give their verdict... Jai dee - you chose well.

I also seldom encounter the problems typically expressed here in the TV forum.

My life in Thailand has not been 100% problem-free in this regard, but such negative encounters have been few and far between.

In fact, the biggest problems I have encountered to date have been with other expats... but that's another story entirely.

Anyhoo, for what it's worth, this has been my experience to date.

I wish you good luck in your new job, and suggest that you just be yourself.

Couldnt agree you with more . I work in pretty much the same way but with Prathom and Mathium students. The response and outcomes are fantastic and the school loves it.

[orpheus454]

Even former students should be off limits.

You mean I should get a divorce...?