When is enough, enough.

[pigeonjake]

i agree with charlie on this one,

but ide of been well pissed of if my wife had just said her father could come and stay without asking,

at the end of the day its a parnership and you should of been asked if it was ok,

and if they had distroyed my garden they would of been out,, im afraid it would be him or me,

but its each to there own, i dont work hard for others to come and take the p i ss,

my wife understands this, she knows i work hard and ive said this is how it is in the real world, in the uk you work for your money, not expect it from your children,

your call my freind,

good luck

You leave and everything becomes hers. The same as the sucker who built up a pig farm for his wife and then she said she no longer loved him. I know a Frenchman who built up a successful bakery business only to have his wife say you can leave now the business is mine. A friend of mine stated most Thai women have an agenda and I believe that is true.

if that a sly back door dig at me myfreind as you know we have a good pig farm in my wifes name,

if my wife were to say to me tomorow i dont want you anymore,

i would miss my children and i would miss her, and my dogs,

but it wouldnt hurt me money wise,,

ive had a very happy 8 coming 9 years and what i would leave would help my children as i would continue to help them, but it wouldnt hurt me in the pocket

anything else to say???seeing as your another jelouse, sorry expert

[thejcb]

Already enough, either tell it to p*iss off or just leave and go back to your own country !

[MyFriend You]

Pigeon ,

thanks buddy,but it's like flogging a dead horse,i am gonna walk/drive[drive sounds less dramatic].but i feel they only see me as a atm now.

Glad you made a decision to say "I'm mad as hell, and am not taking this shi'ite anymore" pack a bag and leave - give her time to correct the family - leave her just enough for her to live on - give it a couple weeks, and come back unnanounced & take a look - if she starts this 'Family First' crappola - then I would visit the Umpur for a divorce. Naysayers will comment = You married the whole family, not so, I was successful with the Sin Sod BS - when they said it was Thai Custom, I said, Okay American Custom is the Father pays for the Daughters Wedding, that shut them up. So you can overcome their 'thai custom' but if yoiu're anything like me - when its time to go, I didn't look back after giving it 'one more chance' too many. Good Luck and would like to hoist a glass with you one day.

[Rajhulmaheesh]

There are not a lot of intelligent middle class women who want a nice simple life with a dog 2 kids and a nice white picket fence who dont have a lot of baggage.

If there were im sure guys would marry them.

There are tons of women in the next soi to marry as you say..........mostly prostitutes....................hahahaha!

PS I really dont think guys who marry prostitutes are good guys. Good guys dont marry hookers......hahahahaha!

I'll reread the OP, didn't see where it said she was a former hooker.

Doesnt have to be a hooker. They all have the same mindset.

Anyway . Why dont guys have problem with teenage daughters?

The only explanation i can think of is the girls are sent away to be groomed for a career in mid-level office administration, bank tellering, or optician, best being in bkk or pattaya.

[Rajhulmaheesh]

Pigeon ,

thanks buddy,but it's like flogging a dead horse,i am gonna walk/drive[drive sounds less dramatic].but i feel they only see me as a atm now.

Well if that is the final then let them know they broke the bank and show them what real rage is. Starting destroying stuff that is in your way and crap on the floors and laugh as your doing it > at them.

If op thinks they finally started to see him as atm i would argue from day 1 he was seen as an ATM.

There really isnt ANY other reason for villager to marry dubious farangs they meet in various sois that serve adult beverages.

[YeahSiam]

It looks like you read it well enough to even memorise the contents. No doubt while you have a 'rummage' in your pocket while you vicariously recalled the contents of said post no doubt getting a bit carried away thinking about 'juggling contents' and 'tight jeans' etc.

Now I think of it, you did say you were 'shaking like a paint stirrer' in front of your computer the other day. Now we know why....

It was a pretty risque post so it was pretty memorable but

like I asked before, why am I not surprised that you leapt

to his defence? Does his situation bear similarities to

yours? Is that one of the aspects of your charmed life

I'm supposedly envious of? You know; marrying a hick,

building extensions to her house, paying her bills, being

called 'the falang' even when you're right there in the room

and struggling to earn the respect of pubescent kids from

a previous marriage or Is it the potential for a shot

at the daughter the part I'm jealous of?

I am tired of seeing good guys like us get <deleted> over and we just sit on our hands and take it because we don't want to loose the hot wife or girlfriend, but when you head clears of her you will kick yourself for being so clueless I should say.

Good guys like us??? If someone is disrespectful enough to

his wife that he can drool over her 17 year old daughter's

backside, he's not what I would call a 'good guy'. I'm sure he'd

go down a scream on 'Pattaya Addicts', though. Anything goes

there, doesn't it?

Notable that the main thrust of the advice being offered to this

'person' revolves around re-establishing control with money.

"Turn off the taps; that will bring her back into line". Yep

because it's worked so well to date hasn't it? Talk about the

blind leading the blind.The fact is, the OP's wife already told

him she's going to stop having sex with him once she turns

40 so he was being shown the door all along but was too

dumb to see it. Her son's probably under orders not to flush

the loo from his mum.

Good for her.

[Estrada]

Charlie,

Thanks for your input buddy,and also Eddy,slapping them i feel would not have done anything,much that i wanted too,we are talking back country peasants here,but what i don't get is i have given them a glimpse of a better future,yet they would rather wallow in filth,it's probably too late for the old man,i guess i should be gratefull he did not have a dump out there,but i ask and ask,and still they seem happy to wallow in filth.

They dont care about wallowing in filth, for them its normal, I have staff and ALL of them would rather live na shithole than take care of a place, keep it clean and tidy etc etc.

They also spend every bit of their salary they save nothing at all even though they could easily save half of it.

Personally id chuck em all out of your house and they will call you blackheart forever rather than ever think it was of their own doing.

Yes, I'd never accept any family to come live in my house (well, maybe except a sexy bisexual sister).

Firstly it would destroy all intimacy, and second: my house, my castle. I don't make some rules, I make ALL the rules.

It sounds harsher than it is, but at the end, who doesn't like the rules has to leave.

This is Thailand... Her house.. Her castle.. Her rules..

[thaibeachlovers]

obviously your wife and her family know you are weak and treat you with NO respect, give her a warning to shape up or ship out. I hope you not another one here in pattaya that walks the walk but cant talk the talk, if so nothing will change. good luck.

Another one that doesn't read the posts. The only person "shipping out" will be the OP. It's HER house.

[thaibeachlovers]

I do have sympathy for the OP, but am somewhat concerned by the evidence of comments about the step daughter. I'm glad it came up though because it's quite relevant. Clearly the lust wore off and the OP's dongle turned its attention to a new, immoral target.

Men are led into these situations by the lure of regular sex with a young woman. I'm not saying they don't end up loving the girl, but this is the initial motivation. They agree to marry an impoverished, uneducated girl in exchange for a dutiful sex slave (for want of a better word) and maid. Part of the negotiation is that you support the children from her previous marriage/relationship and her parents (this is even an optional stipulation on the pre nuptial contract template provided by the Swiss embassy).

In Thai-Isaan culture (I am assuming this where your wife is from), daughters support their parents as they age. Because your wife doesn't work it falls on you to bankroll this. This should come as no surprise. Neither should her mother, father, brother or sister moving in with you. It really is worth studying a culture before marrying into it. Moreover, even though there has been extensive Thaification over the years, there are many notable difference between Isaan culture and central Thai culture, and indeed the culture of the South, so worth learning about those core difference too.

They agree to marry an impoverished, uneducated girl in exchange for a dutiful sex slave (for want of a better word) and maid

Been reading the Sun, have you? You obviously don't know many Thai wives then. They might have sex, but that's probably because they enjoy it, not because they're being paid for it.

[Estrada]

Why do you guys stick with a woman who has one or more children from a previous marriage???

You're in for 200% of problems at least, sigh...sigh and sigh.

When I finally decided to agree to move over to her parents village (I would have preferred living at least 30kms away) - we built 1km out of the village - she told her parents they were not welcome in our house unless they were invited. This worked out very well.

We still had some problems with brothers and sisters we bailed out.

Just learned yesterday that the loan shark mafia passed by her mothers house (the younger sister - who lives in the back yard - lost some money again at the local casino) and mother had to give her 100B to pay off her daily due to the mafia. Chances the sis will pay her mother back ever is zero, what a bitch.

Thus family is a problem unless you live at least 100kms away until they die. It would be better for all of us if the mafia would kill the sister , and oh if they could kill the younger brother also, do you want to know why also?

I met my Thai wife in the UK when she had one daughter aged 2 years, born in the UK but Thai father. Never had a problem with her daughter, speaks English with a BBC accent as well as Thai and Japanese. Only had problems with our own children now aged 18 and 20.

Edited January 24, 2015 by Estrada

[thaibeachlovers]

i agree with charlie on this one,

but ide of been well pissed of if my wife had just said her father could come and stay without asking,

at the end of the day its a parnership and you should of been asked if it was ok,

and if they had distroyed my garden they would of been out,, im afraid it would be him or me,

but its each to there own, i dont work hard for others to come and take the p i ss,

my wife understands this, she knows i work hard and ive said this is how it is in the real world, in the uk you work for your money, not expect it from your children,

your call my freind,

good luck

You leave and everything becomes hers. The same as the sucker who built up a pig farm for his wife and then she said she no longer loved him. I know a Frenchman who built up a successful bakery business only to have his wife say you can leave now the business is mine. A friend of mine stated most Thai women have an agenda and I believe that is true.

I agree that those two guys were suckers, as are all the guys that buy their wives cars, houses and support their families. They wouldn't do it for a westerm woman, so why do it for a Thai one?

[thaibeachlovers]

Charlie,

Thanks for your input buddy,and also Eddy,slapping them i feel would not have done anything,much that i wanted too,we are talking back country peasants here,but what i don't get is i have given them a glimpse of a better future,yet they would rather wallow in filth,it's probably too late for the old man,i guess i should be gratefull he did not have a dump out there,but i ask and ask,and still they seem happy to wallow in filth.

I have to agree, village Thais are generally dirty.

It's a bit like trailer trash in the US, front garden full of trash and rusting old cars, fridges, etc.

Oh, so my wife and her relatives must be the exception to your rule. None of them in the village are dirty. They keep clean houses and no trash or rusting old cars in the yard.

[YeahSiam]

Been reading the Sun, have you? You obviously don't know many Thai wives then. They might have sex, but that's probably because they enjoy it, not because they're being paid for it.

Of course some enjoy it but within the context of this

topic of discussion, many more do it ias part of the deal

with their husband. The OP's long-suffering wife, for

example, said she wasn't going to sleep with him once

she reached 40. I suppose she did it for enjoyment

too, huh?

[thaibeachlovers]

Been reading the Sun, have you? You obviously don't know many Thai wives then. They might have sex, but that's probably because they enjoy it, not because they're being paid for it.

Of course some enjoy it but within the context of this

topic of discussion, many more do it ias part of the deal

with their husband. The OP's long-suffering wife, for

example, said she wasn't going to sleep with him once

she reached 40. I suppose she did it for enjoyment

too, huh?

If the OP's wife told him that before he married her, then he can hardly complain. Neither can she if he looks elsewhere for sex.

[Dukeleto]

Time to put your foot down and walk. If she comes back grovelling remain resolute. If you want her back, then at this point lay down exactly what you want, like: Dad moves out to another sibling and either tell her that she teaches your son to flush his turds or you do it for him, but either way you don't have them staring you in the face in their coke coloured water every time you go for a dump.

If she does not come back grovelling and ready to make the changes you want then you are already better off. No turds and no father creeping around and destroying and littering your garden. By leaving you will very soon find out what the situation is exactly and where you stand in the scheme of things. It's time to take control of your life and happiness. To go back before establishing all of this first will put you in an even weaker position and leave everyone thinking you are a doormat ATM. It's tough love I'm afraid.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

It was a pretty risque post so it was pretty memorable but

like I asked before, why am I not surprised that you leapt

to his defence? Does his situation bear similarities to

yours? Is that one of the aspects of your charmed life

I'm supposedly envious of? You know; marrying a hick,

building extensions to her house, paying her bills, being

called 'the falang' even when you're right there in the room

and struggling to earn the respect of pubescent kids from

a previous marriage or Is it the potential for a shot

at the daughter the part I'm jealous of?

Just to point out having sex with a gf/wifes daughter from another relationship is considered perfectly normal by most Thai males.

It may be distasteful by western standards, but not so bad by Thai cultural standards. In a village situation, everyone would consider it normal.

Indeed, my current gfs stepfather only married her mother to get at her (age 17). She tells me she put up with it until she was 19 then simply moved out.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Charlie,

Thanks for your input buddy,and also Eddy,slapping them i feel would not have done anything,much that i wanted too,we are talking back country peasants here,but what i don't get is i have given them a glimpse of a better future,yet they would rather wallow in filth,it's probably too late for the old man,i guess i should be gratefull he did not have a dump out there,but i ask and ask,and still they seem happy to wallow in filth.

I have to agree, village Thais are generally dirty.

It's a bit like trailer trash in the US, front garden full of trash and rusting old cars, fridges, etc.

Oh, so my wife and her relatives must be the exception to your rule. None of them in the village are dirty. They keep clean houses and no trash or rusting old cars in the yard.

Is this your US trailer trash relatives, or your Thai village people relatives?

Edited January 24, 2015 by AnotherOneAmerican

[thaibeachlovers]

Charlie,

Thanks for your input buddy,and also Eddy,slapping them i feel would not have done anything,much that i wanted too,we are talking back country peasants here,but what i don't get is i have given them a glimpse of a better future,yet they would rather wallow in filth,it's probably too late for the old man,i guess i should be gratefull he did not have a dump out there,but i ask and ask,and still they seem happy to wallow in filth.

I have to agree, village Thais are generally dirty.

It's a bit like trailer trash in the US, front garden full of trash and rusting old cars, fridges, etc.

Oh, so my wife and her relatives must be the exception to your rule. None of them in the village are dirty. They keep clean houses and no trash or rusting old cars in the yard.

Is this your US trailer trash relatives, or your Thai village people relatives?

Given that this is a Thai forum, why would I be talking about Americans?

Edited January 24, 2015 by thaibeachlovers

[YeahSiam]

It was a pretty risque post so it was pretty memorable but

like I asked before, why am I not surprised that you leapt

to his defence? Does his situation bear similarities to

yours? Is that one of the aspects of your charmed life

I'm supposedly envious of? You know; marrying a hick,

building extensions to her house, paying her bills, being

called 'the falang' even when you're right there in the room

and struggling to earn the respect of pubescent kids from

a previous marriage or Is it the potential for a shot

at the daughter the part I'm jealous of?

Just to point out having sex with a gf/wifes daughter from another relationship is considered perfectly normal by most Thai males.

It may be distasteful by western standards, but not so bad by Thai cultural standards. In a village situation, everyone would consider it normal.

Indeed, my current gfs stepfather only married her mother to get at her (age 17). She tells me she put up with it until she was 19 then simply moved out.

Most Thai males?

Sorry but what are you smoking?

[AnotherOneAmerican]

It was a pretty risque post so it was pretty memorable but

like I asked before, why am I not surprised that you leapt

to his defence? Does his situation bear similarities to

yours? Is that one of the aspects of your charmed life

I'm supposedly envious of? You know; marrying a hick,

building extensions to her house, paying her bills, being

called 'the falang' even when you're right there in the room

and struggling to earn the respect of pubescent kids from

a previous marriage or Is it the potential for a shot

at the daughter the part I'm jealous of?

Just to point out having sex with a gf/wifes daughter from another relationship is considered perfectly normal by most Thai males.

It may be distasteful by western standards, but not so bad by Thai cultural standards. In a village situation, everyone would consider it normal.

Indeed, my current gfs stepfather only married her mother to get at her (age 17). She tells me she put up with it until she was 19 then simply moved out.

Most Thai males?

Sorry but what are you smoking?

Most Thai males that take on another man's baggage.

[manarak]

Charlie,

Thanks for your input buddy,and also Eddy,slapping them i feel would not have done anything,much that i wanted too,we are talking back country peasants here,but what i don't get is i have given them a glimpse of a better future,yet they would rather wallow in filth,it's probably too late for the old man,i guess i should be gratefull he did not have a dump out there,but i ask and ask,and still they seem happy to wallow in filth.

They dont care about wallowing in filth, for them its normal, I have staff and ALL of them would rather live na shithole than take care of a place, keep it clean and tidy etc etc.

They also spend every bit of their salary they save nothing at all even though they could easily save half of it.

Personally id chuck em all out of your house and they will call you blackheart forever rather than ever think it was of their own doing.

Yes, I'd never accept any family to come live in my house (well, maybe except a sexy bisexual sister).

Firstly it would destroy all intimacy, and second: my house, my castle. I don't make some rules, I make ALL the rules.

It sounds harsher than it is, but at the end, who doesn't like the rules has to leave.

This is Thailand... Her house.. Her castle.. Her rules..

555

Try to tell that to a successful Thai man...

Stop being a doormat.

[bheard]

Move on.

From what you say the people concerned are totally ignorant, uncivilised and unable to behave reasonably.

They aren't gonna change in a hurry, you'll never change their behaviour, so your frustration will only grow and you'll end up wrecked.

Move on.

[GooEng]

Keep driving

[Blackfox]

Kenny Powers has written the most informative and sensible post.

The OP failed to learn enough before jumping into the relationship.

Also, to be ogling the daughter of your wife and posting it, you deserve what's come for you.

Som nam na.

I doubt a truly good Thai girl will take you onboard.

[luckynero]

Leave all of them, she can't invite her dad to share ur life without consulting u, she's taking u for a milk cow, like most do... Get out of there, or u will regret it for ever.. It only will get worse

[luckynero]

Leave all of them, she can't invite her dad to share ur life without consulting u, she's taking u for a milk cow, like most do... Get out of there, or u will regret it for ever.. It only will get worse

[up-country_sinclair]

obviously your wife and her family know you are weak and treat you with NO respect, give her a warning to shape up or ship out. I hope you not another one here in pattaya that walks the walk but cant talk the talk, if so nothing will change. good luck.

Another one that doesn't read the posts. The only person "shipping out" will be the OP. It's HER house.

I'd be interested to know whose house/land it really is. Because if it's the father's house/land, then he had every right to do what he did. I'm not saying he's not a d1ck, but he would have had the right.

Overall though, it seems like a horrible situation to be in. In my opinion the OP should sell everything in that house that he paid for, get in the car and then never look back.

[Cypress Hill]

I said she had a nice butt,

my comments were innocent,stop infering things that i did not say,and get out of your sanctimonius preaching attitude

Is this so, mkp? WERE your comments innocent? I ask because I very much remember that thread and while YS might be coming off a little Victorian in his tone, his heart's in the right place.

Anyway, let's have a look see what all the fuss was about, shall we?

Wow, that's kinda damning isn't it? I mean, it craps all over your attempt to trivialize what you did and what you wrote, doesn't it? Can you explain why would you need a "cold ab nam" if you weren't hot under the collar, mkp?

[ozyjon]

WOW The first time i have read post from start to finish.

Are the gloves on or off.

Reminds me of this fellow i met once. While driving across

the country one time, i stopped in a pissy country town with

one 7/11 that had a welcoming cool A/C. I got some supplies

and was finishing a cool ice cream when another falang turned

up, so i did what was expected of me and ignored him but

when he came out of the 7/11 he came over and started a

conversation, he invited me to his place and as i had time to

kill, me thinks OK,, after a bit of time he brings out the photo

album,,, exactly the same story,, builds a new house, new

everything,, beautifully landscaped yard,, then i see some

other photos that don't make sense so i asked him to explain.

He said after he built the house, the mother and father came

to stay and never left, they turned the place into a filthy pig

sty,, all cooking rubbish thrown out the window into a pile

the father brought some pigs in and some buffalo,, the

toilet never got clean,, he said the smell from the stench

and the unhygienic living style drove him nuts,, finally he

just walked out and left it all behind,,, it was the best he

could do, not just for his health but for his sanity...

There was a stepson involved but i won't go there.

[Doc46]

O kay, first of all who are you married to,,,,,The lady you love or the family????Tell you loved one that you only want to live with her and may be kids and remove the rest,,,,,If she cannot do that,,, she does not love you enough,,,,if that is the case ,,,G>T>F> out of there.