Afraid to go back home

[geriatrickid]

I'm afraid going back to Nazi Germany will be getting a paramilitary affair for me.

I've experienced sheer violence there, and that's contagious.

I will not let them try brainwashing again. I know that they do it, why they do it, where they do it, and how they do it. And I will talk and bring evidence (even proof)

After being in Asia for more in 1969, I was not allowed to join German Army anymore because I told them I would use any weapon against them. So I studied, became a scientist, and eventually ended up in Bank IT. My attitude has not changed, though. They should have let me go to Thailand, without trying "attitude adjustment". I still don't love Big Brother (or Big Sister)

I am not surprised you are employed in the "IT' sector. Nor am I surprised that the German military would not issue you with a firearm. I find that reassuring. This may come as a disappointment, but you are not a scientist.

What you term as "brainwashing" or "attitude adjustment" is most likely your employer in conjunction with health professionals, trying to help you.

You are fortunate to have an employer who cares and wants to help. In Thailand, an employee would just get fired and be left to fend for himself. The German employment laws and culture is such that large employers are expected to help.

It's time someone told you that.

[Blackfox]

This is a really good thread.

I'm aghast.

This thread gives weight to many of my posts in previous threads.

Just too many low class men here with no real friends and not enough $$$'s to support themselves in comfort when visiting the home country.

Bugger me, you're the ones I see dressed in low class western attire with the short legged equally low class Thai buy at immigration or randomly around town.

Honestly, time for you old guys to crawl under a rock and die.

You tarnish the younger, smart, wealthy, savvy lads here.

The older inferior low class Americans are the ones the stand out most.

Can't you relocate to a neighboring country please? You just don't have the "get up" for this capital city...and never had it.

If you're living your mediocre lives upcountry; do me a favor and stay there.

If you don't have any real friends in your home country and are ill equipped to finance even a short rendezvous there then, you're just a low class western bum.

I just wish you retirees would piss off somewhere else <deleted>.

Jeez, why did you come here as a last resort.

Believe me, the Thais don't want your mediocrity. Don't you get it?

Edited July 11, 2015 by Blackfox

[Goldbear]

It seems to me that if you are the type of person who spends a good chunk of your day with friends and family that you wouldn't want to move to Thailand.

I like my friends and some of my family but I don't spend a large amount of time with them anyway.

Edited July 11, 2015 by Goldbear

[Blackfox]

Hell, I genuinely hope and doubt I'll ever be in many people's position on here.

I'm only mid 40's and own several properties. I also have many genuine friends in Aus wishing for me to visit and stay regularly.

Perhaps I'm harsh, but many of you old guys here just didn't ever plan well enough.

As the old saying goes; if you don't plan, you plan to fail.

No one wants to be with a mediocre failure. That's why many of you have so few friends.

Yes, harsh, but very much the truth in my opinion.

Reading many of your posts, I wouldn't want your kee nhoc arse hanging around my house either.

You don't have the wealth to spend time in your home country's well....why the <deleted> did you even come here?

Counting your pennies; eating at food courts and chasing happy hours for many I bet.

Don't whine; you've only got yourselves to blame.

Yours is the perspective of a well adjusted, normal person. You have done a better job at keeping your friendships than me as I neglected some of mine and didn't take care of them. One has to put some effort into it, as you do. You will be criticized and it will come from the people with nasty failed marriages, who's children want nothing to do with them and who have some serious behavioural problems but don't see it. One cannot reason with such people. Everyone else is to blame for their problems except them. One thing I do understand is that there are a lot of foreign losers in Thailand, often ending up in IT or "internet sales" or "promotions". They are creepy and cringe worthy. Well adjusted people avoid them.

I'm only mid 40's and own several properties. I also have many genuine friends in Aus wishing for me to visit and stay regularly.

Perhaps I'm harsh, but many of you old guys in here just didn't ever plan well enough.

You understand very little about life, because you are too young.

As you get older, all your relationships fail.

That's the way life is.

In my 40s, I would have said exactly the same as you, in my 60s I know better.

Absolutely nothing you can do about it.

That's a dismissive cop out. If all your relationships fail, then that's your problem.My father who is elderly has maintained some of his friendships and relationships dating back to his childhood. Far better than me, but I hope to be able to do that.. Now, his relationships are ending because people are dying. Yes, we move on in life and yes many of us develop. We gain new friends and relationships as we shed some of the bad relationships. However, only someone with serious behavioural problems is incapable of maintaining relationships over time. Is it any wonder that some children hate their TVF parents? I learnt the values of generosity and compassion from my family. It is obvious that the people whinging about abandonment do not understand these concepts. People don't want to be near chronic complainers, drunks, slobs, cold hearted judgemental pricks and those without jaidee.

Holy shit brother…I'm a little taken aback by your honesty.

Yes I agree, one must make an effort to maintain connection with friends from home.

I've written a very harsh post but many here should take heed.

You mostly come from developed nations having had opportunity. I genuinely believe that the majority that came to Thailand either squandered, poorly planned, or failed in their western life.

I'm being entirely honest. The number of sweating, frail, or heaving white masses I see getting around Bangkok disgusts me.

Too many of you failed and it comes through on this forum.

Why do I post like this on a late Saturday night/early Sunday morning?

I went out tonight with my wife and one of her friends and saw some of you. It makes me <deleted> sick and ashamed.

This is a strong classist city. Please, can't you low class westerners piss off somewhere else. You just don't get that you're not wanted here. If you're afraid of having no one or nothing at home, there's other lesser developed nations nearby that'll take you in...just not here.

Im direct, but it needs to be stated.

Edited July 11, 2015 by Blackfox

[Blackfox]

[quote name="Blackfox" post="9607133"

"One thing I do understand is that there are a lot of foreign losers in Thailand..."

"I learnt the values of generosity and compassion from my family. It is obvious that the people whinging about abandonment do not understand these concepts. People don't want to be near chronic complainers, drunks, slobs, cold hearted judgemental pricks and those without jaidee.

Geriatrickid; perhaps one of the most genuine posts ever on this forum pertaining to us, the western man, residing here in Thailand.

If you are without many friends Geri, PM me. I'm guessing we are a very different type of person, in age also, but I'd be happy to meet you if around BKK.

Edited July 11, 2015 by Blackfox

[JLCrab]

From above: As the old saying goes; if you don't plan, you plan to fail.

John Lennon attribution: Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.

[cooked]

This is a really good thread.

I'm aghast.

This thread gives weight to many of my posts in previous threads.

Just too many low class men here with no real friends and not enough $$$'s to support themselves in comfort when visiting the home country.

Bugger me, you're the ones I see dressed in low class western attire with the short legged equally low class Thai buy at immigration or randomly around town.

Honestly, time for you old guys to crawl under a rock and die.

You tarnish the younger, smart, wealthy, savvy lads here.

The older inferior low class Americans are the ones the stand out most.

Can't you relocate to a neighboring country please? You just don't have the "get up" for this capital city...and never had it.

If you're living your mediocre lives upcountry; do me a favor and stay there.

If you don't have any real friends in your home country and are ill equipped to finance even a short rendezvous there then, you're just a low class western bum.

I just wish you retirees would piss off somewhere else <deleted>.

Jeez, why did you come here as a last resort.

Believe me, the Thais don't want your mediocrity. Don't you get it?

A lot of hate there. If anyone should piss off it may be you. 'Younger, smarter, savvy'? This is as low as you can get you arrogant piece of manure.

[rexpotter]

Ha Ha, there is a big Karma payback coming for one poster in this thread.

"You become what you Criticize"

[Blackfox]

Nah, that's where you're wrong.

I've planned well and had the attributes to first, have good friends, and second, keep them.

There's absolutely no doubt that height, attractiveness, personality, wealth and class ensured that.

You're familiar with "natural selection"?

Just man up and accept the truth. This is the way of the world.

[farang000999]

nothing like getting a phone call from someone you havent seen in ten years letting you know they need you to pick them up (car rental too expensive) and house them (hotels too expensive)

[micmichd]

I'm afraid going back to Nazi Germany will be getting a paramilitary affair for me.

I've experienced sheer violence there, and that's contagious.

I will not let them try brainwashing again. I know that they do it, why they do it, where they do it, and how they do it. And I will talk and bring evidence (even proof)

After being in Asia for more in 1969, I was not allowed to join German Army anymore because I told them I would use any weapon against them. So I studied, became a scientist, and eventually ended up in Bank IT. My attitude has not changed, though. They should have let me go to Thailand, without trying "attitude adjustment". I still don't love Big Brother (or Big Sister)

I am not surprised you are employed in the "IT' sector. Nor am I surprised that the German military would not issue you with a firearm. I find that reassuring. This may come as a disappointment, but you are not a scientist.

What you term as "brainwashing" or "attitude adjustment" is most likely your employer in conjunction with health professionals, trying to help you.

You are fortunate to have an employer who cares and wants to help. In Thailand, an employee would just get fired and be left to fend for himself. The German employment laws and culture is such that large employers are expected to help.

It's time someone told you that.

Thanks for pointing it out.

Surely it's oK that German military don't give firearms to someone that would shoot his own officers if asked to hand over his girlfriend (that was the issue), and I didn't want to join the German army anyway.

IT in a bank was my last job.

I've also got a MA from University of Heidelberg, and I worked as a scientist. But that was long ago. Hopefully they have young people that dare to do field research (participant observation) in marginalized subcultures.

The last marginalized subculture I was in was a mental hospital. I actually went there voluntarily, just for one weekend, to see what it's like. It was a horror, they forced me to stay there, and when I refused they poisoned me with heavy psychopharmaca, just to find out that there was actually nothing wrong with me - except that I got addicted to their psychopharmaca now. Then this was taken as an excuse to exclude me from all participation on economy for half a year, exactly in the time when I had to get ready to move over to Thailand.

I'm not about to blame my last employer (a bank in Frankfurt) for that. They simply did not know what had happened. I was kept in isolation, so I couldn't tell them myself.

I blame the German legal system that makes it possible to expropriate patients in mental hospitals from their free will, I blame the medical staff their that sacrifice their patients' well-being to organizational requirements, and I blame all those who think that authorities can't fail if they come up in the name of legal science. Those mental doctors are not scientists as long as they think they can't fail. If they think they can make "scientific" experiments on patients like me (without their consent) then they are no better than Nazi doctors in concentration camps. If the law allows them to do so, then there's something wrong with the law.

I can see the danger that humanity (and constitutional rights) migt be sacificed to economic needs, and I'm afraid certain media make their contribution to this.

Back to topic:

I've met quite a few expats in Pattaya who have severe problems with their families or authorities back home. Their families and authorities don't respect their decision to live in Thailand, they regard it as a mental defect. The "help" they offer usually results in a cut-off from money supply and the urge to return to Farangistan where they most probably end up in one of the asylums for the elderly. Understandable that many expats are afraid of a perspective like this.

[fey]

nothing like getting a phone call from someone you havent seen in ten years letting you know they need you to pick them up (car rental too expensive) and house them (hotels too expensive)

the posters a total &lt;deleted&gt;, sending rejection letters to people who won't put him up. but at least he did ask, i'll give him that.

really get a bad vibe from this guy. total passive aggressive guilt trip. he's best avoided altogether.

[chrisinth]

I can't read too much fear from going 'home' in this thread.

What I am mostly reading is the fear to spend money when visiting 'home'.

Or, even worse IMHO, the reluctance of (old) friends, through whatever changed circumstances, in putting you up.

Maybe I'm different, but if I was visiting 'home' the last thing I would do would be to impose on anyone.

Financial fears v Friends is not an argument, and if friends cannot cancel your financial fears, you have no right calling them friends in the first place.

[NoshowJones]

I'm going back to the UK in August albeit with some trepidation and I've only been in Thailand for nearly 3 years.

Luckily I have a son and daughter and some friends who can put me up.

I think, though, after a couple of months I'll be chafing at the bit to return to Thailand.

I have two brothers back in Scotland, they both have spare rooms in the house, I get along very well with both of them.

Reading between the lines I know that none of them would want me to stay in their spare room for a fortnight, so I always

book into a hotel when I go back there.

[micmichd]

nothing like getting a phone call from someone you havent seen in ten years letting you know they need you to pick them up (car rental too expensive) and house them (hotels too expensive)

Pick them up? Maybe, if they pay for gas.

House them? Maybe, if they clean dishes, sweep the floor and help to make the garden.

[NoshowJones]

This is a great topic, the posters who are always negative, and have nothing nice to say to anyone, and the trolls have stayed away so far. Long may it continue.

[NoshowJones]

This is the letter I wrote to the few people I had contacted.

Bob,

Listen, I do not feel well enough to get on an airplane and fly around the world so I have canceled this ticket. Thanks you for your effort so far with it. I found the whole thing starting to totally stress me out thinking about trying to be back in Michigan and be a burden to people and just being in the way. Also the flight I got kind of tricked me as I bought it on Etihad and after I looked closer it ran me through two other low rated airlines on the trip. This also adding to my worries.

If I feel like I am healthier later perhaps I will try it but unfortunately I think I have burned too many bridges to feel welcome anywhere. Thats life I guess. You can call me a coward or whatever, but that whats happening. In the end my health is not good enough to go and do this in ten days. And I hate 12 time zone changes like you cant believe.

Take Care

i almost feel bad for saying this, but spare us all the passive aggressive crap.

jesus, if this isnt the definitive thai visa thread, i dont know what is.

what a festival of sad.

This has been a great topic with a lot of great posts.

[NoshowJones]

It is always wonderful to see long lost friends again and having them stay at my home is enjoyable for two or three days, then after that it starts to become inconvenient. It was the same back in my home country, if we had a party or get togethers and a friend or friends stayed overnight, it always felt like a relief when they left the following day.

This is not being selfish or anti social, people have their own lives to lead and things to do. Having friends stay means they have to be entertained and catered for, which places a hold on our normal schedules. The same applies in my home country, family and friends have to work, go shopping, have appointments and all the normal routine stuff

Times have changed since my younger days when I was single and my best friends were single, when we were happy go lucky, these days most of my old friends are married, have families and busy lives, the same as me. I would never expect people to accommodate me for longer than a couple of days.

If the OP would like to travel back to his country, then he should rent a cheap bed and breakfast accommodation and a car or even a motorbike or bicycle so he can go and visit people that I am sure would be thrilled to see him, perhaps even happy for him to stay a night or two, but expecting people to accommodate for several days or more is rather pushing the boundaries of peoples hospitality and not to be expected.

It`s all a matter or being reasonable and using common sense.

Getting cheap accommodations in the US is impossible. Renting a car is out of the question due to high insurance costs the OP would have to pay. A motorcycle is not cheap either, and a bicycle is impractical as his friends are scattered away from Flint.

Have you ever heard the expression; house guests and fish start to smell after 3 days?

Have you ever rented a car with full supplemental liability insurance in the United States?

Yes.

[Cypress Hill]

Nah, that's where you're wrong.

I've planned well and had the attributes to first, have good friends, and second, keep them.

There's absolutely no doubt that height, attractiveness, personality, wealth and class ensured that.

You're familiar with "natural selection"?

Just man up and accept the truth. This is the way of the world.

Jesus H, what the hell is WRONG with you?

You make sense on some of things you say then you go all Aryan master race.

You sound mentally unhinged and extremely angry.

When others - like myself, I'll admit - give some of the jokers on here a hard time, it's at least done with an element of a piss take but you take it to another, sinister and truly disgusting level.

Almost everyone I know who's enjoyed good fortune financially, socially and emotionally tends to have developed compassion for those less fortunate than themselves and a considerable dollop of humility but YOU . . . you seem hellbent on grinding down everyone who doesn't fit into your idea of what's right.

I wonder what that supposedly "glamorous" wife of yours would think if she read some of the nasty, arrogant and obnoxious crap you're throwing at people on here

You talk as if shit doesn't happen; as if best laid plans can't turn to dust. You talk as if it's beyond the realms of possibility that your idyllic little existence couldn't be turned upside down.

Well, here's hoping things continue to go well for you but if they don't, you won't have to look much further than the fascist BS you've spewed in this thread to know the source of your karmic retribution.

[micmichd]

Cypress Hill is right.

A correct description doesn't mean you want it this way.

Are you sure no never try to doll yourself up sometimes?

BTW: Nowhere in his post did CH make any racistic remark about Aryans or the like.

Edited July 12, 2015 by micmichd

[sgtsabai]

I started coming back to SE Asia in 2002. As my friend, another Viet Vet, said when we walked out of the old Don Muang airport, "Welcome Home". I left the Corporate Police State of Amerika in 2010 and have no desire to go back. For one I have no desire and yes even a bit of fear of facing the gestapo at the airports. I've had many people try to get me to return for several different reunions but as much as I wanted to see them, I wouldn't go and they understand why. My friends, like me, aren't rich so they can't just jump on a plane and fly over here. Many of them are a bit Leary of the gestapo also. My closest friend, along with many other friends, was killed by Agent Orange, others suffer from that damned poison. I have friends that would met me at their home airport and put me up without a problem. Family well, mom and dad are long dead, my son has dropped off the radar and my daughter hasn't spoken to me since 1998 after I kicked her fat, lazy, bitch of a mom out. I didn't burn all my bridges, but sold all my property, including my guns, with the exception of the rifle I used in combat which I gave to my son. Thailand isn't perfect, but I am happy here, much happier than I had been or would be in the states. I have a 3 bdr/2 bath house, truck, wife and 2 kids. My retirement and VA payments are enough, although like most we always want more. Why in hell would I ever want to return to the US? Medical? Possible, but I would have reinstate Medicare Part B to reinstate my insurance from work, I would need both for major medical, and could I have the same life style afterwards as I have now. I am quite "active". I doubt it. No, unless that is a 90% possibility I'll just enjoy life as best I can here and when it's done they can pop me in the oven, hopefully with a Singha Lite, until I am well done.

[zierf1]

Are you that guy that asked a question about overstaying his visa 10+ years?

[ALFREDO]

Sad to say.....but I guess your "so-called" friends weren't really your friends then

I went back to australia 3 years ago,i asked my oldest son if i could possibly stay with him and his wife.Was asked for "how long"...i said 1 week.The response i got was 3 days would be ok!

Contact with "friends" that would still be, more or less ok.

BUT, my oldest son stopped even any contact with me,

from an old dispute - about embezzlement of my families jewels.

A nice sum if sold.

An offence his, in the meantime deceased mother, my then girlfriend and her parents did when I was in Thailand long ago.

That I could not support him anymore when he was 23+ and still had lessons in some kind of school,

(Acting school) went not well with him also.

[ALFREDO]

Didn't have many real friends in Germany, most of them already dead. Others turned out to be rats, and *they* are afraid I come back. They owe me quite a bit, and nobody wants to know a creditor who could ask to pay back. Some even threaten with police if I dare to show up.

Guess I'll be a tourist or an outlaw if I return to Heidelberg, probably both.

".......nobody wants to know a creditor who could ask to pay back.

Some even threaten with police if I dare to show up."

That would sound more that you borrowed from them.

[ALFREDO]

I am going once a year back for a week or two to Germany for my visa. Never bothered anyone to stay over and prefer to just stay in a hotel, sit at a cafe or have a couple of beers in Berlin Kreuzberg. Meeting a lot of great people's but seldom Germans and when I feel to get back to Thailand I just book my next flight back home.

"....going once a year back for a week or two to Germany for my visa."

The Visa, is not the real reason to make that expensive trip, or?

Sure you could make your Visa arrangements here also in Asia I think.

[puukao]

to the OP:

1. laugh at the hate, it will NEVER help your life

2. thank your "friends" in the USA and decline, but tell them maybe in the future

3. consider teaching in S. Korea and save for 1 year. It won't be easy, but might be the best choice for now

4. have an honest talk with yourself, figure out your strengths and gifts and do a job that comes easy for you

5. i agree, USA will drain your cash quick and food prices are crazy here now....

6. deep breaths, map out a few scenarios, and then decide on one or two.

7. execute, don't look back for now, and soon enough things will be much easier

Note: most people with money who are super negative have serious health problems. if you are healthy, give yourself high marks. if you are smart, give yourself high marks. money is critical, but the ones that have money and throw stones.....LOL....they are usually the worst off. and in some cases they have even less cash, which is hilarious.

Edited July 12, 2015 by puukao

[micmichd]

Didn't have many real friends in Germany, most of them already dead. Others turned out to be rats, and *they* are afraid I come back. They owe me quite a bits, and nobody wants to know a creditor who could ask to pay back. Some even threaten with police if I dare to show up.

Guess I'll be a tourist or an outlaw if I return to Heidelberg, probably both.

".......nobody wants to know a creditor who could ask to pay back.

Some even threaten with police if I dare to show up."

That would sound more that you borrowed from them.

No, it's exactly how I said. People in Farangistan tend to avoid their creditors, maybe they feel guilty. Some look for silly excuses, some suffer from sudden amnesia, some just speculate that I never come back. Edited July 12, 2015 by micmichd

[fey]

Truth is one seldom wants to visit long term with others who don't care to put them up.

Having to stay in a hotel under the guise of hospitality is a farce that rarely occurs with family ime, more a formal type arrangement that has it's uses for a business meeting I suppose.

So, why is the poster bitter and/or crying about it?

Sounds like a free loader who has other reasons for visiting the area or country that are not related to just visiting with the 'friends'.

I had a step brother who was very good at this type of stuff, so I can feel it when I smell it (he's the one on the left in my profile pic).

Edited July 12, 2015 by fey

[Guy360]

1. After traveling the world and working for the US Govt for 23 years and not been back to the USA - even for a visit - for over seven years, I recently went back for retirement out processing. Here's what I found

2. AirBNB.Com - you can rent rooms in peoples houses or the whole apt itself for 'next to nothing' all over the USA for short term stays. Meet some very nice folks doing it as well............you basically become part of their extended family and they love your stories about living overseas.

3. Enterprise car rentals - $600 a month for a Stnd Car - I use a Amex Platinum to rent it - no insurance required as Amex covers the rental.........or look in phonebook - Rent-a-Wreck $400 a month for a good used car. I once bought a used car drove it for a month all over the USA and when I got to Los Angeles, donated it to the VFW - took full Blue Book value off my Taxes.

4. Motel 6 or 8 has rooms all over USA for $40-$60 a night

5, Guess your friends were not very friendly after all - find new ones.

6. I am back in Thailand after 2 months in the US - tired of hearing Police Sirens all night, Booming Radios from people's(?) cars playing Gangsta Rap, News full of shootings, bombings, protesting's, riots over police/citizen shootings............told my family if they see me again they will be lucky, or they will have to come to SE Asia to see me.

Good Luck

I know California in summer is higher than average but they last time I stayed in Motel 6 it was $90. Foot punctured by glass shard in bathroom. Near Nimitz freeway in Oakland. Probably not safe to walk around at night. Humped it over to Sams Hofbrau anyway.

By the way Motel 6 in Santa Barbara wants $229 next weekend.

Looking at Maui in August, anything available about $215.00 night minimum plus taxes and fees.

Dozens of nice hotel rooms on the SF Peninsula (San Bruno to Mountain View) on El Camino that charge $85 - $115 per night. Many have weekly packages for $500 or less.

[ALFREDO]

The number of sweating, frail, or heaving white masses I see getting around Bangkok disgusts me.

I went out tonight .... It makes me <deleted> sick and ashamed.

This is a strong classist city.

Please, can't you low class westerners piss off somewhere else. You just don't get that you're not wanted here.

there's other lesser developed nations nearby that'll take you in...just not here.

Im direct, but it needs to be stated.

Next time, just walk to the people you mentioned and tell them =

================================================================================

"sweating, frail, or heaving white masses - disgusts - sick and ashamed -

low class westerners piss off somewhere else - you're not wanted here -

there's other lesser developed nations nearby that'll take you in"

From another posting "time for you old guys to crawl under a rock and die."

================================================================================

Let me know the outcome.

Edited July 12, 2015 by ALFREDO