How did you meet your partner?

[Crazy chef 1]

Boy can you keep your negativity out of my thread...this is a light hearted topic not serious...

I made a joke that he took the wrong way, that's it!

Anyway you can expect these kind of reactions in a thread like this.

Cheers mate...

[Fabricus]

Thaifriendly.com

[JAFO]

@dennis123,

No problem at all. I really wasn't offended. I kind of stepped back and thought it was a bit out of line being you do not know me or my wife but hard to see you were joking in a forum thread.

I do suggest however you get out of Pattaya. That place skews the entire country along with Patong. It does explain a lot in your responses as you mentioned. Thailand is a HUGE place and once out of those tourist rich areas life becomes a bit more "real". Its kind of like Las Vegas or Cabo San Lucas. Its an entertainment area.

Answering your other question, when we met we were both in our 40's(Me upper, her early). Truth be told, She wasn't sure if she wanted to date anyone, especially a foreigner. She told me she had heard about what foreigners want from Thai women as soon as they start dating. We laughed about it. She told me she doesn't drink, smoke or go to bars so if I am looking for that type she was the wrong one. I wanted a companion to go off and see and do things with. Up to us meeting she had been taking care of her mother who had recently passed and worked at a hospital so her shifts varied. Her time off then became taking care of her father. She clearly did not need me as she owned her house and car and displayed that she was financially secure. I slowly got to meet her family and friends over that year or so period. We just grew on each other and now she is my best friend and we are living in the states for a bit longer then we will move home to the house we both designed and worked to build in the North.

Cheers

[Jessi]

June 1990 in a country music pub. Twenty-first wedding anniversary last week. 1 daughter and 1 son now both in their twenties.

Btw I have to admit that we had last week our wedding anniversary but I forgot it...lucky me she forgot as well...

I cant forget mine, it was a new years day, a lot of sore heads after the party the night before.

[SantiSuk]

In a bar.

.... coffee bar

[Cypress Hill]

I actually enjoy all the stereotypical myths that exist. Some really make me laugh.

"All Thai women want a western man"

"All Thai woman are bar girls or prostitutes, especially if they are with a westerner"

"All Thai women's family requires Sin Sod"

"All Thai woman only like western men for their money"

"All Thai women that speak good English have been with many western men"

Cheers

Let's put it slightly differently for the sake of discussion, 95%+ of Thai women that are interested in a foreigner are prostitutes in one way or the other and only go for the money.

Now anyone can disagree with that but I only have to look at the age and looks of both parties which confirms it completely, even the ones that move oversees with their new 'love', it's nearly always an foreigner that would have a real hard time finding a wife in his own country with a relatively good looking and younger Thai lady.

Absolutely correct

[colinneil]

I met my wife on the internet.

Best thing i ever did.

[AlexRRR]

Yea, no one ever met their wife in a bar, I believe that. Or maybe too shy to admit it. This topic is so done. Move on please.

Hey not all your TV contributors crawl low to the ground spend all there free time in some bar trawling seeded areas...

[AlexRRR]

I actually enjoy all the stereotypical myths that exist. Some really make me laugh.

"All Thai women want a western man"

"All Thai woman are bar girls or prostitutes, especially if they are with a westerner"

"All Thai women's family requires Sin Sod"

"All Thai woman only like western men for their money"

"All Thai women that speak good English have been with many western men"

Cheers

Let's put it slightly differently for the sake of discussion, 95%+ of Thai women that are interested in a foreigner are prostitutes in one way or the other and only go for the money.

Now anyone can disagree with that but I only have to look at the age and looks of both parties which confirms it completely, even the ones that move oversees with their new 'love', it's nearly always an foreigner that would have a real hard time finding a wife in his own country with a relatively good looking and younger Thai lady.

For example I only know one couple quite well that lives in Pattaya that does make a good match, all the other couples, a few dozen that I know, don't make a good couple.

Doesn't that say something?

Mate you got to leave your traditional thinking back in you home country, you show little insight to an asians woman mind or customs, what applies in Europe AU or anywhere else does not apply here.

If all your knowledge is from the seedy areas of everywhere you have lived you know next to nothing.

I will say this...you attract where your at, and that means in your mind even subconsciously, think about it.

[DP25]

I actually enjoy all the stereotypical myths that exist. Some really make me laugh.

"All Thai women want a western man"

"All Thai woman are bar girls or prostitutes, especially if they are with a westerner"

"All Thai women's family requires Sin Sod"

"All Thai woman only like western men for their money"

"All Thai women that speak good English have been with many western men"

Cheers

Let's put it slightly differently for the sake of discussion, 95%+ of Thai women that are interested in a foreigner are prostitutes in one way or the other and only go for the money.

Now anyone can disagree with that but I only have to look at the age and looks of both parties which confirms it completely, even the ones that move oversees with their new 'love', it's nearly always an foreigner that would have a real hard time finding a wife in his own country with a relatively good looking and younger Thai lady.

For example I only know one couple quite well that lives in Pattaya that does make a good match, all the other couples, a few dozen that I know, don't make a good couple.

Doesn't that say something?

It does say something. It says you live in Pattaya, a brothel town for sextourists and retired sexpats, and are extremely ignorant and apply that experience to the rest of the country.

You mention you know this because of the age of the foreigner, but the vast majority of the foreigners I see are in their 20s, 30s, and 40s, because they are still working and not retired sextourists in Pattaya. Get out of Pattaya and you see expats of all ages, not just retired people. There are tens of thousands of working age farang working here, and it is not at all true that 95% of them are dating hookers. A lot of guys I know are dating women that have NEVER dated a foreigner before and had never even considered it before. They met through work or through friends or just by being the only foreigner in the neighborhood.

Some of us actually SPEAK THAI and met our partners because of that.

[nikmar]

In a restaurant on a beach on Ko Samet where she was working.

Something about her made me keep going back to that beach and eventually she left with me.

We broke up twice and I could have had freedom but like I said, something about her makes me return.

She's been my lover, best friend, teacher and now the mother of my son.

She's also the reason Im still in Thailand after 10 years.

Weird thing is, I had come here for a little adventure and told myself I was NOT going to find a girlfriend. I'd been here less than a week when I met her.

[slipperylobster]

Had to delete a real good answer....because I thought the question was how did you "meat" your partner.

[manfredtillmann]

met her at my best friends funeral.

he died as a result of a motorbike accident in vietnam, he was married to a thai girl from 'up here', had a little daughter, a few months old.

his 'red - neck' family from australia could not get their act together to send even one of theirs - so i went. left on my wedding anniversery, had a flat tyre on the way to the airport, rang for a taxi, paid A$ 180 just to get me to my plane on time.

arrived at nakhon phanom airport after an overnight at bkk, got collected by the widow's stepfather, who did not speek one word of english.

arrived at the wake when everyone was drunk, had my first thai beer with a filthy handfull of nam kang served by the widow's brother...

she was a friend in the back ground, just took care of things, hopped on the moped, got more beer, put food on my plate...

selfless, serving with humility but with dignity. i got hooked soooooo much! all i ever wanted from a 'partner , wife , friend'.

still here - on and off - 6 years later. don't think i'll ever leave.

[NoshowJones]

Met her in Pattaya on Beach Road, NO! it's not what you think, she was just down for a short time

for a break with two female friends.

We have now been together for ten years, and married for five.

[NoshowJones]

June 1990 in a country music pub. Twenty-first wedding anniversary last week. 1 daughter and 1 son now both in their twenties.

Country music club? Is she a fan of George Jones?

[NoshowJones]

I caught her ping pong ball, it was love at first sight!

You are supposed to bat the ball over the net on the table, not catch it.

[davethailand]

In my old bar (before it was mine).

[NoshowJones]

Yea, no one ever met their wife in a bar, I believe that. Or maybe too shy to admit it. This topic is so done. Move on please.

Read post #7. He met his wife in a bar. OH, sorry!

[i claudius]

I actually enjoy all the stereotypical myths that exist. Some really make me laugh.

"All Thai women want a western man"

"All Thai woman are bar girls or prostitutes, especially if they are with a westerner"

"All Thai women's family requires Sin Sod"

"All Thai woman only like western men for their money"

"All Thai women that speak good English have been with many western men"

Cheers

Let's put it slightly differently for the sake of discussion, 95%+ of Thai women that are interested in a foreigner are prostitutes in one way or the other and only go for the money.

Now anyone can disagree with that but I only have to look at the age and looks of both parties which confirms it completely, even the ones that move oversees with their new 'love', it's nearly always an foreigner that would have a real hard time finding a wife in his own country with a relatively good looking and younger Thai lady.

For example I only know one couple quite well that lives in Pattaya that does make a good match, all the other couples, a few dozen that I know, don't make a good couple.

Doesn't that say something?

"Doesn't that say something" yes it does you are a sad person who hangs around with other sad people, I know lots of happy couples here ,I am sure a few met in bars ,I am not rude enough to ask ,but like myself most are business people and met their wives either through work or social gatherings ,you should stop hanging around bars and get about more but then I suppose you live the life here you lived back home , very low class

[irishsmile]

I caught her ping pong ball, it was love at first sight!

Hahahaha! Classic!! Brilliant!!

[i claudius]

To add to my post above ,I had a business in BKK, met her there 23 years ago,married 22,we have lived in the UK , as has our son ,he is in university here,we live in Pattaya,my wife is in business,I help a little but to be honest have not her energy ,much prefer an easy life ,always have,and luckily have always been able to indulge My lack of energy for hard work lol.

[JAFO]

@CrazyChef1. Sorry your tread went into another debate. I suspect they all do when you have myriads of opinions, comments coupled with people with different agendas and moral values. One thing about Thailand and most of SEAsia, there is likely somebody for everyone.

Regardless I actually enjoy reading where and how folks met. There are some really nice couples in Thailand I have met through business and out and about, albeit I have way more Thai friends than wester. Conversely I have met some nasty, rude, drunk all the time sex tourists who I chose not to associate with (no different then how I would behave in my home country). I was glad when I finally got out of BKK. There is so much more to Thailand then tourist hangouts. My wife and I have visited some very beautiful relaxing places both North and South. In my 10 years total in Thailand I have never been to Pattaya and most likely will never go. There is nothing there that compels me to want to visit the area (although I admit morbid curiosity drove me some time back to want to go see it lol). My wife has never been either. She said, one day after we were back here in the states, "would you take me to your seedy dirty area to visit here?" I said "No" I would not. We both laughed.

Post #39, #40 and #49 say a lot especially the reference of "you are who you associate with" or something to that affect.

Cheers

[alvinlight]

At Uni

And come back to Thailand

[davethailand]

Hasn't this all been done before?

[oxo1947]

I guess our first date went pretty much like most of them do.---

After some drinks, she excused herself to go to the bathroom. That was in June..........................

[i claudius]

@CrazyChef1. Sorry your tread went into another debate. I suspect they all do when you have myriads of opinions, comments coupled with people with different agendas and moral values. One thing about Thailand and most of SEAsia, there is likely somebody for everyone.

Regardless I actually enjoy reading where and how folks met. There are some really nice couples in Thailand I have met through business and out and about, albeit I have way more Thai friends than wester. Conversely I have met some nasty, rude, drunk all the time sex tourists who I chose not to associate with (no different then how I would behave in my home country). I was glad when I finally got out of BKK. There is so much more to Thailand then tourist hangouts. My wife and I have visited some very beautiful relaxing places both North and South. In my 10 years total in Thailand I have never been to Pattaya and most likely will never go. There is nothing there that compels me to want to visit the area (although I admit morbid curiosity drove me some time back to want to go see it lol). My wife has never been either. She said, one day after we were back here in the states, "would you take me to your seedy dirty area to visit here?" I said "No" I would not. We both laughed.

Post #39, #40 and #49 say a lot especially the reference of "you are who you associate with" or something to that affect.

Cheers

Why knock a place you have never been to,? Pattaya,is far more than walking street and the bar areas, and most of us never ever go there , same as I suppose you and your wife do not visit the brothels in your town,so if you know nothing about a place except what you read ,don't judge

[JAFO]

@CrazyChef1. Sorry your tread went into another debate. I suspect they all do when you have myriads of opinions, comments coupled with people with different agendas and moral values. One thing about Thailand and most of SEAsia, there is likely somebody for everyone.

Regardless I actually enjoy reading where and how folks met. There are some really nice couples in Thailand I have met through business and out and about, albeit I have way more Thai friends than wester. Conversely I have met some nasty, rude, drunk all the time sex tourists who I chose not to associate with (no different then how I would behave in my home country). I was glad when I finally got out of BKK. There is so much more to Thailand then tourist hangouts. My wife and I have visited some very beautiful relaxing places both North and South. In my 10 years total in Thailand I have never been to Pattaya and most likely will never go. There is nothing there that compels me to want to visit the area (although I admit morbid curiosity drove me some time back to want to go see it lol). My wife has never been either. She said, one day after we were back here in the states, "would you take me to your seedy dirty area to visit here?" I said "No" I would not. We both laughed.

Post #39, #40 and #49 say a lot especially the reference of "you are who you associate with" or something to that affect.

Cheers

Why knock a place you have never been to,? Pattaya,is far more than walking street and the bar areas, and most of us never ever go there , same as I suppose you and your wife do not visit the brothels in your town,so if you know nothing about a place except what you read ,don't judge

Fair response i claudius. So with that said what does Pattaya have to offer? Now bear in mind I have had many people both Thai and Westerner that have visited the place and the only "positive" comment that came out the area was if you want lots of "Western Conveniences" Pattaya has it. I stated positive as some tourists want "Home away from home" so I guess that's a good thing for those types. I formulated my opinion from the consensus of people who commented on it. So judging a place is fair if you trust the people who are telling you about it. I did quite a few searches about Pattaya early on and nothing ever came back that made me want to go see the place. It spoke volumes that my wife had never been, she just said her friends said its a waste of time and crowded with tourists. In the end I feel safe with my decision to never go feeling I might miss a good spot in Thailand. It is a heavy tourist location(with a terrible image)

Cheers

[dennis123]

"Doesn't that say something" yes it does you are a sad person who hangs around with other sad people, I know lots of happy couples here ,I am sure a few met in bars ,I am not rude enough to ask ,but like myself most are business people and met their wives either through work or social gatherings ,you should stop hanging around bars and get about more but then I suppose you live the life here you lived back home , very low class

Frequenting bars on regular base in a seedy city equals a low class life? If you say so.

With that kind of thinking I suppose Amsterdam is also nothing more than a red light district frequented by potheads.

Than I don't hang out with those old farts in the bars, who are often too cheap of a Charly to buy a drink for a boy, in fact I hang out with very few foreigners here but I am observant.

As for all the couples I've seen, I'm not talking about those walking around in Pattaya, how could I know if they're a couple or just a temporarily girlfriend? I'm talking about what I've seen at other places, for example the couples that come visit my house in Pattaya that's up for rent again and business owners here in Pattaya while the majority are couples I've seen in my own country (no idea where they found their wifes) so it's quite a varied sample.

[dennis123]

@dennis123,

No problem at all. I really wasn't offended. I kind of stepped back and thought it was a bit out of line being you do not know me or my wife but hard to see you were joking in a forum thread.

I do suggest however you get out of Pattaya. That place skews the entire country along with Patong. It does explain a lot in your responses as you mentioned. Thailand is a HUGE place and once out of those tourist rich areas life becomes a bit more "real". Its kind of like Las Vegas or Cabo San Lucas. Its an entertainment area.

Answering your other question, when we met we were both in our 40's(Me upper, her early). Truth be told, She wasn't sure if she wanted to date anyone, especially a foreigner. She told me she had heard about what foreigners want from Thai women as soon as they start dating. We laughed about it. She told me she doesn't drink, smoke or go to bars so if I am looking for that type she was the wrong one. I wanted a companion to go off and see and do things with. Up to us meeting she had been taking care of her mother who had recently passed and worked at a hospital so her shifts varied. Her time off then became taking care of her father. She clearly did not need me as she owned her house and car and displayed that she was financially secure. I slowly got to meet her family and friends over that year or so period. We just grew on each other and now she is my best friend and we are living in the states for a bit longer then we will move home to the house we both designed and worked to build in the North.

Cheers

Sounds legit, next to the bar that I temporarily owned lived a 45 year old guy from my home country, together with his 40 something Thai wife, just a regular couple that used to live in Holland for a number of years, after legal issues they had enough of it and moved to Thailand, married, they own the building next to me and what not so of course there are relationships based on real love.

But it's so extremely rare for me to see,

In Holland I've seen so many Thai couples, due to knowing certain people, not just random people that I come across while shopping or something, the Thai wifes work, so do the husbands but when you look at those guys, they have zero chance, and I'm pretty sure that each and everyone of those considerable younger ladies, think 30 vs 50 year old, will find another husband after 5 years. That's one huge sample I'm talking about.

Ok I stay in Pattaya, but I've been to Isaan multiple times, I've lived a while in Donsak, I've lived for 3 months at Koh Samui, I've travelled quite a bit and although I don't doubt that there are 10000+ foreigners spread through the country at working age like myself. But where are they? I really can't find them. The only type of couples that I do regularly run into are for example people at the gas station while travelling, I mention that cause I see them with their whole famiiy, a car and what not so I guess they're integrated right and I see them at hospitals, and other non tourist places and it's always old farang with a relatively young wife.

Maybe I should start to live in Bangkok, to unbiase my view? Well I don't think that gives a fair idea either cause Bangkok is also just one city which would just as Pattaya give a biased view on the other side of the spectrum.

95% is obviously a wild guess when you leave Bangkok out of the equation, but it is a quite reasonable guess based on quite neutral places where I've seen them as per my above examples.

You know what I'm curious about, how many are literally transferred by their employer to work in Thailand (yes they have a right to refuse) vs the ones that move here by their own accord and find a job? I think only that already makes a big difference in the type of couples as most younger people who have a decent life in their own country wouldn't opt to move abroad to live in a country with lower living standards. Most would argue Thailand is great for holiday but not as a place to live and I largely agree with them. It's just that I have very specific reasons to live here that you'll likely never heard before, no I'm not a fugitive lol.

Moving out of Pattaya

Where you suggest I'd go? Bangkok? I hate it. I don't speak Thai, I can't just settle somewhere that has very few foreigners and where hardly anyone speaks English, I think my life would become very isolated when I live in a non tourist area, also I'm gay, and most gays tend to move away to either Pattaya, Bangkok or Phuket so if I wanted to find a partner it would be so much harder in other areas in Thailand as well. Well moving from Pattaya to Phuket is just replacing one seedy area for another right. I have thought about Udon Thani though, however I'd miss the sea too much.

To top if off, on regular base I have friends visiting me who stay a few weeks, they love Pattaya, I think they would become real bored if they had to visit me up North, I also have friends I met in Pattaya that frequent Thailand once or twice a year, people of my own age that I hang out with when they come, so in high season I'm quite busy with visitors, in low season it sometimes bores the hell out of me and makes my life look quite artificial by only hanging out with bar workers so to say. However next May I move back to my own country and stay there for 5 months, my dad has some serious health issues and I like to meet up with old friends again so no more 365 days a year in Thailand, three years is enough.

Edited October 2, 2015 by dennis123

[davethailand]

So because I met my wife in a bar and we spent probably 5 nights a week for over 12 years in bars (or I did) in Pattaya then we are both low class?