Sin Sod

[anon4546543]

If two people love each other, sinsod and every other aspect of a wedding will be sorted prior to the documents at the local amphur. Some posters are bashing Thai culture based on phantasy or ridiculous claims. Thai culture is alive and well, especially in the countryside. Most Thai people in the cities also keep it alive. If your to be wife is some lust baby bar girl and has spurned you, fleeced you or humiliated you, don't take it out on Thai culture. You obviously have not met some of the western vultures (of either sex) "back home". So give it a break, your complaining makes you not only lose face, it makes a mockery of what you perceived to be love.

[puukao]

I have promised 3 million baht, since I want them to be finally stable.

note: currently 3 million baht short

[smotherb]

Did anyone pay sin sot for a bar girl?

[wooloomooloo]

If you want quality then look inside yourself before you commit.

My wife and I recently celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary and my wife is now a British citizen.

A small and reasonable sin sod was involved on marriage and hasn't caused us any longterm problems.

Tomorrow we travel to LOS for our second holiday of the year. Life is good.

[Jaggg88]

Here's what the legal experts say....

http://usa.siam-legal.com/family-law/thai-dowry.php

[onthemoon]

Here's what the legal experts say....

http://usa.siam-legal.com/family-law/thai-dowry.php

A legal expert doesn't need to be a cultural expert, but this article is actually very good.

[onthemoon]

I always tell my GF in my culture the brides father pays for the wedding,if it's love they understand naturally.

Sure. And you are also marrying in your culture, i.e. in your native country, right?

[onthemoon]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

Do you understand that Thailand is in the process of losing it's own culture?

Do you understand that Thailand is now embracing farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand has not (yet) come to grips with it's new farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand now is a very confused nation?

Maybe you should not tell farangs how to behave based on a disappearing culture?

Where did you read that? I'm sure it's all a bit confusing to you.

Where in Thailand do you live and how long have you lived here, pray tell?

[stoneyboy]

I always tell my GF in my culture the brides father pays for the wedding,if it's love they understand naturally.

Sure. And you are also marrying in your culture, i.e. in your native country, right?

Actually we want to get married on the moon.

[onthemoon]

3years ago, i refused to pay Sinsod....been divorced ever since, luvverly jubbly!!

Do you mean there is a causality?

[nidieunimaitre]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

Do you understand that Thailand is in the process of losing it's own culture?

Do you understand that Thailand is now embracing farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand has not (yet) come to grips with it's new farang culture?

Do you understand that Thailand now is a very confused nation?

Maybe you should not tell farangs how to behave based on a disappearing culture?

Where did you read that? I'm sure it's all a bit confusing to you.

Where in Thailand do you live and how long have you lived here, pray tell?

Where did I read that the original Thai culture is disappearing?

I did not read that. I see it everywhere around me: clothes, food, social media, money, TV, cars, buildings,... everything is becoming more and more westernized.

I am not saying this is a good or a bad thing. Only observing.

I live in rural Chanthaburi, 8 years now, why do you ask?

Off topic, but "pray tell" is in my opinion an argumentative expression. Why do you use it?

[Ghostnigel]

3years ago, i refused to pay Sinsod....been divorced ever since, luvverly jubbly!!

Do you mean there is a causality?

Her parents wanted 10 Million (yes, really) so you could say there is a causality....enough effect to walk away, anyway.

I am now with a lovely girl who wants nothing from me, a school teacher, She has no kids, got her own house, and car, i do help her a little with the car. She has a nice family that also want nothing. They just want their daughter to be happy.

They would never ask for anything, so i would be happy to give them sinsod, but they are not expecting any.

[fang37]

The Sin Sod system is quality # 1.

The Thai government supports it as a method of redistribution of wealth.

It is considered far superior to income tax & inheritance tax.

Personally, I totally support it. Furthermore, "sin sod" is a "sexy" term - don't you think?

[devaxprem]

steven100, on 03 Oct 2015 - 13:30, said:

Some do , some don't ... it's a thai cultural tradition that is slowly fading year after year.

It's not mandatory, it's a personal choice whether you want to give a sin sod or not.

Maybe discuss building the house rather than giving the sin sod, also the family may agree this is a better idea.

BTW ..... I believe this has been discussed 1,000 times before on TV. Just search ' sin sod '

Sin-sot is not only an institution for pharang, we have a house in Phibun Mangsahan and the sin-sot for thai people are quite higth le last mariage 2 years before 300'000 thb the guy came make love few time and not come back ----> loose 300'000 thb.

an other niece has a thai boyfriend lawyer the girl 22 , thai man in his 40's the sin-sot has been set a 500'000 thb.

If you love this women I suggest that you perform a Thai mariage, these people gain the face if you do and sure the sin sot will be count in front of all the guest

what you will have negotiate with the family is your problem , but less than 100'000 thb will be a rediculous proposition.

70 years in France the woment had to pay the dot.

good luck many guy here in Pattaya do not care about mariage and family but by and by the bitterness of their state come more more when confronted

with other women they loose FACE

Good luck in your choices

[devaxprem]

sin sod his a big story for thaïs people, at least the one I know in Phibun Mangsan, and are rather expensive in thai-thai mariage not un commun 300'000 , 500'000 thb.

I did pay.

It depend in what kind of sociaty you are going to leave in,

after 10 years of social life in Pattaya at least one partie per week average , the girls that do not have a defined satus
hide themseves or avoid Relationship with married women because they will loose FACE

[sean in udon]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Not sure how serious (or tongue in cheek) you meant this to be, but I took it at its juvenile face value.

Gave me a chuckle, even if others thought it necessary to rebuke you.

[anon4546543]

I made a mistake with my sin sod. I did not understand the culture and face that goes with Thai culture. (hopefully I do now) My fiancé asked that I put 1,000,000 TB on the floor on our wedding day. I placed 100,000 on the floor and my Aussie friends who witnessed my wedding had put $100 notes there to. But I also had a large collection of gold coins in a book. These were taken from their carefully, years long presentation and thrown on to the small pile of money. I was horrified. The 50 odd people who surrounded the counting of the money and seemed unimpressed suddenly had smiles on their faces. We had an outdoor wedding reception. Under large tents with a catering team of locals. Hundreds from the village came with envelopes of money. Huge speakers blasted out music.

My wife said, you give me large face to my village. Now we have built a very nice modern house in the village. My Aussie mates call it the Taj Mahal. My adopted children call me papa and dad. I loathe cats, but 5 cats have adopted me. I had had one claw its way up my leg to be in my arms. They chase the dogs away that threaten our chickens and ducks. They have also warned me about snakes before I saw them, never saw so many snakes in my life.

So it is all about face but ultimately it is all about love. And a wonderful life in Thailand, a good wife, beautiful village people that will do anything for you. I will always make sarcastic remarks about some losers that just don't get it.

[louse1953]

I did the Buddhist wedding (not registered) i was building our

house and could see the Issans mothers eyes light up at the

prospect of a financial jackpot, there was never any intention

of returning any money back to me ''a fool and his money are

soon parted'' so this fool stopped overseas money transfer to

Thailand, slowly ran out of money (not poor though) then the

sin sot dilemma started, solution, borrowed money from a

lender for the day, for show, rented a shoebox of fake jewellery

for the day, everyone was impressed at the rich falang, promissed

mama i would give her money at a later day, all happy, when the house

was finished they kicked me out. Lucky i had my secret bank

account at a friends place or i would be in Bangkok with a tin cup

right now, sin sod my arse.

Instead of sinsod for your arse,maybe you should have got a usufruct to cover your arse.

[louse1953]

I really enjoyed the Sin Sod part of my ceremony........all money was in dollars, not because I had dollars but family members contributed to the stash just before the Photo sessions.

Needless to say that after the session I don't even know where all that money went, yet all seemed very happy and we have piles of Photographs for the kids to be 'proud'of.

We are living in SEA and family is always considered first choice, well untill the kids arrived that is (in our case)

Oh my wife is Lao, family originally from Isan.

I truly loved the ceremony 15 years ago!

Sin Sod.......with the right spouse a culture to remain.

With the wrong family,don't continue your relationship other then leaving with her to your homecountry.

That just looks sick.

[misterphil]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

In my culture the brides father pays for the wedding.

Did my Thai wifes father pay for the wedding? NO

50/50 then isn't it.

I don't pay and they don't pay.

[onthemoon]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

In my culture the brides father pays for the wedding.

Did my Thai wifes father pay for the wedding? NO

50/50 then isn't it.

I don't pay and they don't pay.

Good luck with your endeavors in Thailand.

[misterphil]

misterphil, I feel so sorry for you. When in the army, I was taught that the worst possible attribute you can feel, is to feel sorry for someone. Never the less you are bitter and twisted and have been damaged, if not personally, at least in your mind. I suggest you contain your rage, find a lady you can love and respect, not treat as a possession, a partner for your future life. And let go. My Thai wife, her family are beautiful and support us, her village accepts me. You have not found a good lady, or tried to. But your experience is not of many foreigners here.

Im not bitter. Maybe a bit twisted though.

Dont feel sorry for me. Im just fine thanks.

You dont know my wife.

Shes a very good lady by the way.

[brewsterbudgen]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

In my culture the brides father pays for the wedding.

Did my Thai wifes father pay for the wedding? NO

50/50 then isn't it.

I don't pay and they don't pay.

Good luck with your endeavors in Thailand.

I'm guessing he's never set foot in Thailand, nor is ever likely to!

[misterphil]

Are you Thai? NO

Are you Buddhist? NO

Do you pay Sin Sod? NO

Are you a bell end if you pay it? YES

Do you understand and respect the culture of the country you are marrying into? NO

In my culture the brides father pays for the wedding.

Did my Thai wifes father pay for the wedding? NO

50/50 then isn't it.

I don't pay and they don't pay.

Good luck with your endeavors in Thailand.

I'm guessing he's never set foot in Thailand, nor is ever likely to!

Guessed wrong then didnt you.

Dont guess the lottery numbers will you.

[anon4546543]

misterphil, I never disparaged your wife and if you thought so, I apoligise. But you did make an inflammitory post. So I offer this:

Am I a Buddhist? No!

Am I Thai? No!

Did I pay sinsod? . Yes!

Was that money given back to me? Yes!

Do I regret my decision? No!

Is my wife, family and I respected in my village? Yes!

Have I gotten on and grabbed a life? Yes!

Am I bitter and twisted? No!

Do I embrace the culture of my wife and family, her, village, country and King? Yes!

Am I happy and content? Yes!

[puukao]

people love free money, i don't care what they say.....oh, on the dole? shame on you!!! whatever, they love the free money. it is better than no money. if the UK government wants to send me a zillion dollars, or 10 dollars, i'll take it...

if thai woman, i would get married 10 times, no kids, 10 houses, 10 alimony checks....all "husbands" back to farangland..

then i will sell it all, move, and tell people i had good business and sold it for lots of money......hopefully i got enough money to live with elitists....not those poor people on the dole!!!! hahaha...

so yes, give them money so they are happy with free money....more the better.

[RasiMike]

I 'paid' sinsod and all the money was returned when the guests went home after the celebration. MIL and FIL were happy that a large amount of money was counted in front of everyone in the community, the extended family and those attending had a nice 'Thai' time and tradition was upheld..... winners all round.

My wife and I went along with the process because we didn't want to upset the applecart but it was understood by all that we were playing our part in the wedding ceremony. In my experience, flashing some bling and cash, was and still is, the requirement for new unions in our community, regardless of social status/income levels.

I think that to vary from the local tradition, just because I'm not Thai, wouldn't have really helped me be accepted into my wife's family..... they were already pretty stressed that their daughter wanted to marry a foreigner and in hindsight I believe the gesture helped me become accepted into the family. I've seen situations where the tradition was not observed (Thai/Thai and Thai/Westerner marriages) and there have been, and continue to be, less than ideal outcomes.

IMHO rather than accepting the advice from someone telling you it is or isn't required, I'd get to know the REAL feelings of your intended wife and family......A safe home is built on strong foundations.

[Linzz]

I 'paid' sinsod and all the money was returned when the guests went home after the celebration. MIL and FIL were happy that a large amount of money was counted in front of everyone in the community, the extended family and those attending had a nice 'Thai' time and tradition was upheld..... winners all round.

My wife and I went along with the process because we didn't want to upset the applecart but it was understood by all that we were playing our part in the wedding ceremony. In my experience, flashing some bling and cash, was and still is, the requirement for new unions in our community, regardless of social status/income levels.

I think that to vary from the local tradition, just because I'm not Thai, wouldn't have really helped me be accepted into my wife's family..... they were already pretty stressed that their daughter wanted to marry a foreigner and in hindsight I believe the gesture helped me become accepted into the family. I've seen situations where the tradition was not observed (Thai/Thai and Thai/Westerner marriages) and there have been, and continue to be, less than ideal outcomes.

IMHO rather than accepting the advice from someone telling you it is or isn't required, I'd get to know the REAL feelings of your intended wife and family......A safe home is built on strong foundations.

Well said.

We may not come from a culture that likes to flash it's money but economically emerging countries do like to, to show they're doing well and they've arrived. We do not suffer the constraints, social conditioning and social repression either and can afford to spurn and deride what we find distasteful. A luxury for us actually, we have a lot more personal freedom.

Show me the money! It's throughout the culture unfortunately. Showing piles of money at weddings we might find mercenary and repugnant, even the police at news conferences revel in the money they reward themselves with an immodest display. It never crosses their minds that it is, at least to us, crude crass and vulgar.For better or worse success and status are celebrated quite loudly.

But if you want to live in Thailand it's what you have to accept and understand why their values are so different. If you can't you will get judgmental bitter and twisted. Best live somewhere else. If you do and take your wife out of Thailand for a few years, she will learn that other values exist, then on her return she will make the necessary changes in her own small way. Any good change is always by degrees.

In the meantime, respect the traditions as much as you are able, because if you find a good family, your willingness to put yourself at risk will be greatly appreciated especially by your wife. Having said that, you have to use your common sense when it comes to discovering where and who is a good family though and that takes a lot of thought, care and intuition and a little bit of luck also because you are in an unknown culture. That requirement is necessary whether you're with hi-so or lo-so. There are good and bad families in every level.

[The Fat Controller]

I also respected the culture of my wife and her mother, so money was shown at the wedding.

It was a joint effort, I sent some money over for future use and my wife cleared out her bank account, it all went straight back to my wife's bank account as agreed.

Mother-in-law gained a lot of face on the day and wife was happy.

It's still in the bank and we are getting a decent 3.25% interest.

Every family situation is different, what anyone considering marriage has to do is make an agreement as to what needs to be done.

[ScotBkk]

Personally, I think Sin Sod is a great scam.

All us Farangs are here to be used & abused on a daily level, we can’t complain - it’s their birthright. It’s well deserved too. We should all go the whole hog buying into their land development schemes to include purchases of trucks, shared bank accounts, iPhones for all the family, remunerations for all your new relations. You can sit on the best place on the floor eating your spicy chicken feet soup with a good portion of E.coli sauce and Salmonella flavouring flaying your arms in the air screaming out "aroi" for all and sundry to laugh at you. Yes, soon the covert meetings will begin on how to stretch out more funds from you. (or even your neck) once your no longer affluent.

Yes, live the good life now. Remember, they only have your welfare in mind. It would bring a tear to a glass eye. You’ll become a fully-fledged member to the Farang Thais Apologists Club in no time adorned by your free amulet for services rendered.

Be a silly Sod – live in Sin.