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PASSING BY HER DAUGHTER'S BEDROOM DOOR, MOM HEARS A

STRANGE BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM WITHIN. SHE OPENS THE

DOOR TO FIND HER DAUGHTER GIVING HERSELF A REAL WORKOUT

WITH A VIBRATOR.

"WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING?" ASKS MOM.

"MOM, I'M THIRTY-FIVE YEARS OLD, UNMARRIED, AND THIS

THING IS ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND.

PLEASE, GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE."

NEXT DAY, THE GIRL'S DAD HEARS THE SAME BUZZ COMING

FROM INSIDE HER BEDROOM. HE OPENS THE DOOR TO FIND

HER MAKING PASSIONATE LOVE TO HER VIBRATOR.

"DAD, I'M THIRTY-FIVE, UNMARRIED, AND THIS THING IS

ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND. PLEASE,

GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE."

A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER MOM COMES HOME FROM SHOPPING

AND HEARS A BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM, OF ALL PLACES,

THE LIVING ROOM. SHE FINDS HER HUSBAND SITTING ON THE

COUCH, DOWNING A COLD BEER, AND STARING AT THE TV WITH

THE VIBRATOR NEXT TO HIM ON THE COUCH, BUZZING AWAY.

"WHAT THE hel_l ARE YOU DOING?" SHE ASKS.

"WATCHING FOOTBALL WITH MY SON-IN-LAW!"

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