my girlfriend says she cannot manage on 25000 month

[ardokano]

If the guy was not giving her 25k she would have a job of some sort earning 200bht a day, not the 800+ she has now. Mum would be looking after the kids, that's how folk do it here.

Seeing stuff in LOS over many years I can guarantee if he ups the amount now in the future it will be asked to up again...

I know a few who had to much in there pocket and got on the "cards" train, get hooked, lose and keep going back more and lose again. Not saying this is happening with the OP but.....

If the guy was not giving her 25k she would have a job of some sort earning 200bht

Pleasread carefully.

with our 2 year old son

Son for you its nothing?

its OP son..

Edited May 5, 2016 by ardokano

[Gracas]

25,000 a month gives a luxurious life in Isaan to feed all neighbors.

Unlike Bangkok where it's 500 baht for a meal, in Isaan you can eat for 20 baht per meal. I know this because I just had it today in Udon Thani.

I wonder what exactly you're eating for 20 baht?

20 Baht a meal, that must be from the Kids menu. I don't think I could last long on 20 Baht meals, I can only eat so much deep fried grasshopper each day.

[ardokano]

He was simply asking how that amount would work for a lady with the situation he described in Issan.

Calling him a mug? That's just plain rude.

And the answer to that question would be 3,000bht a month. Like all the other farming families.

But remember, most of the rural family groups will consist of 3 or 4 adults per dwelling, her living alone is unusual.

Adding to that, most of them are earning at the rate of 100-150bht/day, nobody is giving them money for sitting around.

(Assuming the average rural income of 3,000bht per adult)

25k = mug

OP is Thai farmer?

Son Op is it?

so need compare with Thai farmer or with OP style life?

Ofcouse another thinks it big chance even OP pay double its nothing to change for his son..

Even i am not sure OP not trolled us..

Op never be in place where live his son?

His do not know cost life for his son?

[gyrosman]

It seems your girlfriend has friends who's BF's gives them more money than 25k each month. Well, don't buy into this. If your the man of the house and like me pay all bills plus I share money is enough.

GOOD LUCK

[Jimbo2014]

From my experience with most ladeez and people in general if they get use to an amount of money - then it seems like not much after a while. They did a poll in the US and asked people how much money would they need to feel comfortable and secure. The response - for all income groups - was approximately double of what they presently received/had. Its human nature to want more. Spending adjusts to income. Dont be too hard on her. Just be firm - explain thats all there is. See how it goes. If she really loves you then all will be cool if you explain that you need to invest for the future.

[chrissables]

The inconvenient truth is you are indirectly paying her for sex in an informal way which is socially accepted in ISAN.

Let’s do the math for a single horny man in ISAN. Intimacy costs Baht 2,500 (could be a whole day’s activity), 3 times per week (1 week on Red), 40 weeks and divided by 12. = Baht 25,000.

However, if you genuinely have emotional feelings about her, perhaps you should give her the benefit of the doubts in the absence of anything to the contrary, be generous with her by providing another Baht 5,000 per month for her to cover all unforeseen contingencies or put aside some monies for her children’s future education. A good man who cares for his ‘soul mate’ and her family should not be a miser with his monies.

Intimacy costs 2500 baht???? In bkk maybe, Issan though????

[timsims]

yes my kids and don't work

[bogozy]

I am horrified. In Isaan or any inside rural areas of Thailand an income of 25.000 THB per month is plentiful for a three persons household, especially without debt. I am living a small village at Phetchabun. A lot of family is living month by month about 10-15.000 THB per month.

Of course if there are high demands, for expensive cosmetics, stylist cloths and etc. limit is to the stars of the sky, and mainly if she should like to demonstrate all days, she has a rich farang husband, the 25.000 THB is not enough for one months, maybe last for one week.

[Colabamumbai]

She lived on a lot less before she met you.

[HLover]

She lived on a lot less before she met you.

And when she's done with this spineless conquest; she'll do it again.

[puukao]

Give her 400,000 a month, then it won't be enough. Then try 400,000 a day, and then it won't be enough. Then finally try 400,000 an hour.....

I am sure she will love you more and more...

[tom21]

She's lying. And you're falling for it.

Apparently Many here in the blog have no idea of what they speak. Either there are only dull prejudice that Thais have to exist on a Minims standard of living when they are together with a foreigner, or many are miserable misers who see their partner as a costfactor.

To all theorists, such is the reality ......

10 Years in TH/ House/Car 4 Family- Members= cost for Family in Thailand on a average Lifestyle will be 40,000Baht/Month,or you punish yourself.

Alternative: Manage your partnership properly or go to Pattaya and hiding the salami every 2nd night for 1500Baht. What a sad life .....

could you give a breakdown on what you spend 40000 thb a month on.

its very easy:

1.Car - 200k per year( oil service , washing etc)its 16,5K

2. children eat scool money 50*22day* 2 children= 2200

3.children pocket money 300-700 *2 children=1000

4.one time per week go with family/son to cinem/ scate 1500*4= 6000

5.clothes/sport stuf/ toys/ some cosmetics(dauther) ets for children its near 20 -40k per yer so ok then30k- 2.5k per month

6.3 scooter near 2000-3000 per month ok then... 2500

7. one per week time go to makro/bigC etc just water meat( not any western style) etc its 2000 minimum so 4*2000=8000

8 electrosity 1100-1700 ok 1200

9 internet - 640

so how much total?

40540

but its not any about clothes for me or fo wife.

not any restaraunt with wife.

not any hobby thinks

not beer

and many another..

and this NOT WESTERN STYLE!!!! even not near

thank you for your reply. if you take away items like car. reduce scooter to 1 and do not go to the cinema which I do not think would apply to the op. the cost comes down to about 16000 thb a month. I know I spend a bit more than you do but the biggest cost is hotels as we go away a lot of weekends. I again thank you for your reply

[lostinisaan]

I had 25 K per month for a few years for my lovely family. We don't own a house. She's gambling, might smoke some red ones, or just Pee Baa. Run, buddy run.

[lostinisaan]

She lived on a lot less before she met you.

Which raises the question if he's the only one who pays her.....

[mesterm]

She's lying. And you're falling for it.

Apparently Many here in the blog have no idea of what they speak. Either there are only dull prejudice that Thais have to exist on a Minims standard of living when they are together with a foreigner, or many are miserable misers who see their partner as a costfactor.

To all theorists, such is the reality ......

10 Years in TH/ House/Car 4 Family- Members= cost for Family in Thailand on a average Lifestyle will be 40,000Baht/Month,or you punish yourself.

Alternative: Manage your partnership properly or go to Pattaya and hiding the salami every 2nd night for 1500Baht. What a sad life .....

could you give a breakdown on what you spend 40000 thb a month on.

4.one time per week go with family/son to cinem/ scate 1500*4= 6000

and this NOT WESTERN STYLE!!!! even not near

Sorry pal, that's not Thai style either. No average Thai would spend 6000 baht a week taking their family out.

Edited May 6, 2016 by mesterm

[jacko45k]

Tell her to get a job then.

[Issangeorge]

Since the ploughing and sowing season is upon us shortly I suggest that she roams the rice fields to compliment your stipend with some hard earned cash. At the same time this should reduce her spending as she will be busy working the fields rather than visiting the shopping malls....

Perhaps the reason she needs extra money, is to pay the workers to plant her field, I know from experience it is expensive. Also school is starting and that always costs more money for books, uniforms etc. If this is a onetime request I can understand.

[harrry]

Not sure that it is her paying to plant her field...more like the workers paying:)

Seriously if it is that what happens to the income from the crop.

[Thunderbirds20]

I pay rent of 8000 and live on a total of 15000 for the month, .. only me though. No kids

[thailand49]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

[thailand49]

Tell her to get a job then.

Her job is being a mother to his children. The reason she is with him is because she doesn't have to get a job! It she had to get a job why would she be with him.

[thailand49]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Rubbish.........

If that is your opinion you have every right to it. I have no problem discussing, debating a topic, to agree to disagree. But when someone just say Rubbish without even a discussion as to why! If anything that is " Rubbish " unless you are just brain dead!

[thaiduncankk]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Thai teachers, some with more kids than her, survive on a lot less than 25,000 baht a month. The kids do not suffer, and most of these families lead quite a comfortable life.

So my advice to her is, to get off her big fat Arse and get a job, if not, go back on the game.

[SOTIRIOS]

...you let it get this far....

...keep paying....pay more...until you can pay no more....or end up in the street yourself....

...many have tried....'to be nice'....'to make a difference in their lives'.....

...it will never be enough.....

....and....nice=stupid.......

...good luck.....

[BeefSlapper]

Make sure she is not gambling

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

[thailand49]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Thai teachers, some with more kids than her, survive on a lot less than 25,000 baht a month. The kids do not suffer, and most of these families lead quite a comfortable life.

So my advice to her is, to get off her big fat Arse and get a job, if not, go back on the game.

The reality is this... she isn't with a Thai Teacher, living in a Thai matter? She is with a foreigner if she wanted to live like a Thai why in the hell did she have two kids with him. Having two kids with a foreigner the expectation here is to have a better life. Just last year a MP, was quoted in a interview in the Bangkok Post in regards to Isaan women. " if you want a better life marry a foreigner " The truth hurts that is why after the interview he was removed from his office!

The problem is your western thinking trying to apply it here in Thailand. If she was making a living in a bar/go-go, making for example 40,000 a month and someone falls in love with her and want her out of the business. You think love is going to make everything right for her and her family? Most of the time the guy think it does? In Asia, sure love exist but in general unless it is a better or easier life they might as well stick to their own kind. This is a tough concept for foreigners to accept! Sure you might be right get her fat ass back to work, but the BM took that away when he locked her up with two more kids! End of story for me!

Edited May 6, 2016 by thailand49

[bamukloy]

The OP should give up everything he enjoys now.

Smokes, beer, wine..all of that krap can go.

As with all those other luxuries..cheese, chocolate, wine, sweets..expensive cuts of meat

give them all up,

No more going to pubs, movies and bars either.

living on mama noodles and boiled tap water now will also save you money that you can then give to these greedy self entitled xxxxxrs.

You can reflect on these things when you are 70, havent got 2 satangs to rub together, and contemplating going back home to beg for welfare.

I guess its not without its advantages...

for sure all the Thai freeloaders will be long gone

and, no doubt you will have your good health, having given up all those luxuries.

[thaiduncankk]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Thai teachers, some with more kids than her, survive on a lot less than 25,000 baht a month. The kids do not suffer, and most of these families lead quite a comfortable life.

So my advice to her is, to get off her big fat Arse and get a job, if not, go back on the game.

The reality is this... she isn't with a Thai Teacher, living in a Thai matter? She is with a foreigner if she wanted to live like a Thai why in the hell did she have two kids with him. Having two kids with a foreigner the expectation here is to have a better life. Just last year a MP, was quoted in a interview in the Bangkok Post in regards to Isaan women. " if you want a better life marry a foreigner " The truth hurts that is why after the interview he was removed from his office!

The problem is your western thinking trying to apply it here in Thailand. If she was making a living in a bar/go-go, making for example 40,000 a month and someone falls in love with her and want her out of the business. You think love is going to make everything right for her and her family? Most of the time the guy think it does? In Asia, sure love exist but in general unless it is a better or easier life they might as well stick to their own kind. This is a tough concept for foreigners to accept! Sure you might be right get her fat ass back to work, but the BM took that away when he locked her up with two more kids! End of story for me!

For your information, she has ONE kid by him.

[thailand49]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Rubbish.........

If that is your opinion you have every right to it. I have no problem discussing, debating a topic, to agree to disagree. But when someone just say Rubbish without even a discussion as to why! If anything that is " Rubbish " unless you are just brain dead!

I have lived in Isaan for many years, I know Thai Isaan folk who have nice jobs, have a family and live on way under 25k.

so OP's bird has NO X's and can't manage on 25k, that is rubbish...

But, birds who lasoo a farang seem to think they are now in the hi-so bracket, her friends think so too, there lies the OP's problem..!

Now that is a respectable response! You last statement is what I wanted him to know you basically agree with me so it isn't rubbish at all! Maybe I didn't say it exactly the way you want it but I agree, she lasoo a farang, she is no longer the same as any other Isaan family, the two kids he father aren't Thai, there is nothing Thai about them any longer! as you noted that is the ops problem! The moment he decided to take care of her father children with her he took on the responsibility. As I say over and over again if she wanted the status quote she would stick to her own kind. The other problem the ops like many are living in a fantasy world thinking everything they learn in the west is going to apply in the West. And this applies to me too and it affect everyone in different degrees. Thailand is known as the Land of Smiles, but once you land and walk out to the Thai hot air it becomes the Land of Stupid!

[thailand49]

I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Rubbish.........

If that is your opinion you have every right to it. I have no problem discussing, debating a topic, to agree to disagree. But when someone just say Rubbish without even a discussion as to why! If anything that is " Rubbish " unless you are just brain dead!

I have lived in Isaan for many years, I know Thai Isaan folk who have nice jobs, have a family and live on way under 25k.

so OP's bird has NO X's and can't manage on 25k, that is rubbish...

But, birds who lasoo a farang seem to think they are now in the hi-so bracket, her friends think so too, there lies the OP's problem..!

Now that is a respectable response! You last statement is what I wanted him to know you basically agree with me so it isn't rubbish at all! Maybe I didn't say it exactly the way you want it but I agree, she lasoo a farang, she is no longer the same as any other Isaan family, the two kids he father aren't Thai, there is nothing Thai about them any longer! as you noted that is the ops problem! The moment he decided to take care of her father children with her he took on the responsibility. As I say over and over again if she wanted the status quote she would stick to her own kind. The other problem the ops like many are living in a fantasy world thinking everything they learn in the west is going to apply in the West. And this applies to me too and it affect everyone in different degrees. Thailand is known as the Land of Smiles, but once you land and walk out to the Thai hot air it becomes the Land of Stupid!