How to make "meeting the parents" in Isaan perfect?

[anthos]

12 minutes ago, petermik said:

Does your "friend" know who is the father to his GF,s kiddie

 

he's been asked this a few times and he still insists it's him

anyway I trust he's qualified to impregnate )

Edited November 27, 2016 by anthos

[TommyUK1960]

Get the parents a buffalo, walk it down the road to their house wearing his favourite football shirt.

The Parents will already be happy he's going to be their future ATM.  Don't spoil them.

[acid thunder]

Quote

How to make "meeting the parents" in Isaan perfect?

 

I've been studying Thai culture for years and there's nothing I don't know about this subject and happy to share the knowledge as I'm not a selfish b'stard. 

 

Once your friend has perfected the meeting plan then he's guaranteed that the parents will think the complete opposite and detest him on first sight.  He can shove the smart phone where the sun doesn't shine, though they'll accept it as a gift anyway, as they'll be certain that he's lording it but he still won't be good enough for their daughter.  They'll also be looking at him as a walking $ATM$ and look to play the long game in the hope that they can extract more money from him than in their wildest dreams.  That's just for starters.

[Lamkyong]

1 hour ago, mania said:

 

Well that throws a wrench at all the gold stories doesn't  it

 

1 hour ago, mania said:

 

Well that throws a wrench at all the gold stories doesn't  it

well not really  you can hock/sell gold   bit difficult with 2nd flowers

[thaibeachlovers]

27 minutes ago, amykat said:

 

I remember watching/reading your move into the country and your stories ...and waiting for the crash!!!  Glad it is finished now!!

 

Once upon a time, there was a hansum' prince from the land of Far Far Away that thought marrying a lovely princess would allow him to live happily ever after in the kingdom of LOS. He never realised that the sister of the princess was in fact a wicked witch, and her mother the queen was a wicked old hag. They plotted to enrich themselves by making the princess get the hansum' prince from another land to hand over all his gold and jewels to them. When the hansum' prince from another land wasn't prepared to hand over the keys to the treasure chest, they put a magic spell on the princess so she turned into a dragon that chased the hansum' prince from another land away. As soon as he ran away from the nasty dragon, the queen and the witch were into the castle taking away all the prince's possessions, so they were happy, but the princess ( after the spell wore off and she reverted to human again ) and the hansum' prince from another land didn't live happily ever after.

From Grim book of horrible fairy stories.

[Lamkyong]

1 hour ago, bokningar said:

Since he don't "put Thai" that wont be a problem.

Smile and keep the beer and other drinks coming. 

Buy chicken, pork and fish for a nice BBQ and you will be all set.

"put Thai"   ???

[Wanderer555]

It is fair to say that there is no perfect solution to this...

Assuming this is a real event and not troll bait, my thoughts include

 

Make sure he is respectful, provides a proper Wai to the parents without the expectation it will be returned,

wear clean neat clothes but not too fancy, and expect the GF to act completely different than in 'normal life'.

 

I agree the cell phone may be a bit over the top, so maybe think about some local favorite foods with the raw beef w/ spices (forget the Thai name) being a possible winner, a bottle of Johnnie Walker Red might also help to smooth things over a bit.

 

For me, the first meeting was somewhat anti-climatic and since then the FIL and I get along great, I make sure to bring him a nice bottle of red wine on occasion, (his favorite drink) and beyond that he really just wants me to treat his daughter well.

 

Overall, your friend should himself, keep the expectations low, but do anticipate a conversation regarding a wedding, money and similar. :)

[thaibeachlovers]

2 minutes ago, Lamkyong said:

"put Thai"   ???

Poot Thai

[oldgent]

Just now, amykat said:

 

His g/f is surely the one who told him to get the phone.

Why oh why, should he look around to see what they need at all?

Maybe they need a tractor ..new truck, new refrigerator??

Do you go to people's houses and do that? Are you Santa Claus?

your a right Cheap Charlie for your information yes i did, i had a proper shower and flush toilet put in also Aircon

its plain to see you have never been in Issan. 

[55Jay]

OP, open wide, inhale deeply. 

 

 

[acid thunder]

13 minutes ago, Wanderer555 said:

... and beyond that he really just wants me to treat his daughter well.

 

My in-laws only want me to treat their daughter well too.  We live abroad and they're happy that she's happy.  Job done.

[lostinisaan]

The phone is  a great gift for her Thai lover. Living here a long time, but he can't communicate doesn't fit.

 

   Are you really sure that your friend produced the baby? Did you and your friend ever read Private dancer and understand what it's all about?

 

   Flowers for mom sounds already insane, sorry other poster. Thais prefer something that doesn't die so fast.

Having a good filled bank account is usually enough to pay for all the stuff that all the people who show up uninvited ( but informed about your friend's trip who might be you).

 

   Tell your friend that they slaugher twp pigs, which shows a good understanding of Thai culture.

 

    Some Lao Khao for the ordinary folks, Regency for the daddy and your friend. 

 

    Please tell your friend to talk to his gf that she's not allowed to sleep in the same room with her brother when he passes out. That's pretty much it. 

 

      Aeeh, please don't forget to smile when you "Wai" your soon parents in law. 

        

[electric]

Has she told Mum and Dad yet that she's got a bun in the oven ? That would be an interesting conversation starter eh !! 

[anthos]

1 minute ago, getreal said:

Does she have a job? Tatooes? Smoke? Drink? Kids?

 

None of the above. Which looks promising in my opinion.
 

 

 

[anthos]

Seems they appreciate each other's good temper for now.

He's quite looking forward to visiting their estate. Should be alright.

I'm not worrying at all, was just thinking to get some funny advice from those who has gone through this without becoming an extortion victim.

 

However appreciate all the gloomy outlook, and people sharing painful experiences. My heart is with you.

[acid thunder]

2 minutes ago, anthos said:

None of the above. Which looks promising in my opinion

 

You missed one.  She most certainly will have a kid imminently.

 

 

Edited November 27, 2016 by acid thunder

[metisdead]

Troll posts, inflammatory posts and posts containing inappropriate language have been removed as well as the replies. 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

I always heard bringing a bottle of JW was a good door knocker in Isaan.

 

BTW, is the friend prepared to answer when asked:

a - how much money is he planning to provide in sin sod

b - how soon is he going to pay to build a house for the GF (and the rest of her family in time), and how much is he prepared to spend on it.

 

In my past experience in Isaan, these kinds of family first meetings usually turn to one or both of those subjects pretty early in the conversation.

 

[amykat]

1 hour ago, oldgent said:

your a right Cheap Charlie for your information yes i did, i had a proper shower and flush toilet put in also Aircon

its plain to see you have never been in Issan. 

 

Gee, I'm pretty sure you did those things for yourself and your g/f's family would have liked a new phone or new flat TV much better!!

 

It's plain to see that I have been around the block here a few times.  Maybe you still haven't been??

Edited November 27, 2016 by amykat

[anthos]

4 minutes ago, TallGuyJohninBKK said:

I always heard bringing a bottle of JW was a good door knocker in Isaan.

 

BTW, is the friend prepared to answer when asked:

a - how much money is he planning to provide in sin sod

b - how soon is he going to pay to build a house for the GF (and the rest of her family in time), and how much is he prepared to spend on it.

 

In my past experience in Isaan, these kinds of family first meetings usually turn to one or both of those subjects pretty early in the conversation.

 

 

I'll tell him to be get ready.

At the moment it looks like he's expecting their farm to be a thrivng agricultural enterprise. 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

9 minutes ago, anthos said:

 

I'll tell him to be get ready.

At the moment it looks like he's expecting their farm to be a thrivng agricultural enterprise. 

 

Yes, and they're probably equally expecting him to become their personal ATM machine.

 

Otherwise Mama and Papa will make sure that his GF/wife will NEVER be happy.

 

PS - If the family don't ask him either of those things, then that's a pretty good sign.  But, I wouldn't be betting on it, depending on the background of the woman and her family.

 

Edited November 27, 2016 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[poohy]

And i thought my day was bad!!!

[bwpage3]

3 hours ago, anthos said:

My friend has spent enogh long years here to be aware of the worst. So it's too late to hurt feelings.

We rather expect some good humour which this forum is famous for ).

 

 

Are you sure this isn't you? Or maybe your friend cannot use the internet and type his own post?

 

 

Edited November 27, 2016 by bwpage3
spelling

[bwpage3]

3 hours ago, Mitkof Island said:

The girl is twenty years younger and is about to have a kid. He speaks nor understands any Thai . And your friend has spent long years here to be aware of the worst ? And where did he meet his darling new girlfriend?

Isaan Thai is not the same as Bangkok Thai!

[bwpage3]

3 hours ago, Shot said:

Toss the cell phone for Dad. Bring plenty of booze and food. Wear a smile, be polite and hope for the best. No drama needed.

Bring a calculator because you and Pops will need to figure out how much Sin Sot you will be paying.

[bwpage3]

50 minutes ago, anthos said:

 

I'll tell him to be get ready.

At the moment it looks like he's expecting their farm to be a thrivng agricultural enterprise. 

Chaiyaphum area many parents are uneducated and never had much schooling (farmers)

 

Isaan dialect is spoken which is not the same as Thai

 

All farangs that show up around that area are expected to be of some financial means. 

 

If there is no money to constantly help the family, this will never last and the mother will pressure the daughter constantly

 

As far as the farm, that is a region where sometimes there is no rain at all and you get zero crops.

 

Then you make zero money, family takes out loans from local sharks for more seeds to try again for the coming year.

 

Her family will now be the focus of everyone in the village to see what "riches and face" the farang will bring to the family.

 

Expect to have a large wedding and dowry. If you say they family does not want it, I say BS.

 

Marrying a farang and not getting any "face" will make her family the laughing stock of the village.

 

A friend of ours (Thai) got married in that area last week, my father is bitching how there was no cola or whiskey or enough food to eat. The whole village is pissed off.

 

Understand if you cannot financially help them, if you have any money at all, better use that to buy something that they can use to earn their own money.

 

A nice 2 wheeled tractor with a good sized wagon for hauling sugar cane, wood, etc that they can use to make a living

 

Expecting the farm to reap riches is foolishness. 

 

You have to really question a 40+ year old that knocks up a 20 year old? 

 

Not even married, not even far into a relationship and now with a kid on the way?

 

You get what you deserve in this life and I expect the Isaan people will win this one in the end

 

 

[TallGuyJohninBKK]

Has the guy had a paternity test done? Does he have any way of knowing for sure it's his?

 

BTW, in the OP,  maybe it's a Brit saying, but what the heck does he has "2-3 pairs of shorts" mean?

Edited November 27, 2016 by TallGuyJohninBKK

[bwpage3]

I don't want some dude knowing how many pairs of shorts I own!

[oldgent]

Just now, amykat said:

 

Gee, I'm pretty sure you did those things for yourself and your g/f's family would have liked a new phone or new flat TV much better!!

 

It's plain to see that I have been around the block here a few times.  Maybe you still haven't been??

yea whatever makes you happy

[Mitkof Island]

1 hour ago, bwpage3 said:

Chaiyaphum area many parents are uneducated and never had much schooling (farmers)

 

Isaan dialect is spoken which is not the same as Thai

 

All farangs that show up around that area are expected to be of some financial means. 

 

If there is no money to constantly help the family, this will never last and the mother will pressure the daughter constantly

 

As far as the farm, that is a region where sometimes there is no rain at all and you get zero crops.

 

Then you make zero money, family takes out loans from local sharks for more seeds to try again for the coming year.

 

Her family will now be the focus of everyone in the village to see what "riches and face" the farang will bring to the family.

 

Expect to have a large wedding and dowry. If you say they family does not want it, I say BS.

 

Marrying a farang and not getting any "face" will make her family the laughing stock of the village.

 

A friend of ours (Thai) got married in that area last week, my father is bitching how there was no cola or whiskey or enough food to eat. The whole village is pissed off.

 

Understand if you cannot financially help them, if you have any money at all, better use that to buy something that they can use to earn their own money.

 

A nice 2 wheeled tractor with a good sized wagon for hauling sugar cane, wood, etc that they can use to make a living

 

Expecting the farm to reap riches is foolishness. 

 

You have to really question a 40+ year old that knocks up a 20 year old? 

 

Not even married, not even far into a relationship and now with a kid on the way?

 

You get what you deserve in this life and I expect the Isaan people will win this one in the end

 

 

totally agree. this situation is a mess. the foreigner has really screwed up. do not expect a warm welcome.