Is it Thai etiquette for the farang to pay for everyones dinner?

[cheapskatesam]

I was watching this video of this Aussie guy and his ladyboy friends.. 

 

 

If you watch to the end.. he pays the bill and says it is Thai etiquette for the Farang to pay for everyone.. 

 

Being a stingy farang with only £700 a month to live this makes me nervous of future situation.. I am not cheap enough not to pay for my lady-friend.. but ladyfriend +all her mates is too much for me. 

 

 

 

[NickJ]

Used to be that the oldest person pays. Not anymore. But the shoe will be tried on. Same with buying a wife that has been married before has kids and worked in a bar.

[samsensam]

 

a few years ago i was buying a ticket at a nearby travel agent, the girl working there was attractive and a little flirty so i remembered her. i then stated to see her around the local restaurants with foreigners and various friends. i later found out that she liked to get customers to take her out for dinner, when the guy turned up for the dinner date, full of anticipation, he found out she had invited a few friends along. and yes, he ended up paying for the lot and yes, when the meal was over so was the date. she really enjoyed dining out for free and treating her friends. and then heading home alone.

[cheapskatesam]

I've had a mix of various experiences with Thai women.. but only once i've had a third-party join us (mum) 

 

One girl. (Fai) i met her and the first date we went to Japanese restaurant in Terminal 21.. the bill was well over 1000baht and when the bill came i went to pay for it but she got her purse out and paid for it all.. i insisted that i pay but she didn't let me... i ended up staying at her place for a few days and i paid for dinner every night naturally because i was saving money on hotels anyway so why not.. We met her mum one day and we went to the sushi buffet place.. i paid for us all and i felt comfortable doing it because her mum was really pleasant to me.. but that's my limit.. GF+significant family member  NOT GF + table of friends 

 

 

[KarenBravo]

When this happens and you realise you are being used by a woman and her mates, start ordering the most expensive items on the menu.

Once you have finished your tender, Wagyu steak, excuse yourself to either go to the toilet, or have a cigarette in the parking lot.

Then, do a runner leaving all the people that played you for a fool with a massive bill.

[cheapskatesam]

18 minutes ago, KarenBravo said:

When this happens and you realise you are being used by a woman and her mates, start ordering the most expensive items on the menu.

Once you have finished your tender, Wagyu steak, excuse yourself to either go to the toilet, or have a cigarette in the parking lot.

Then, do a runner leaving all the people that played you for a fool with a massive bill.

 

Haha nice one.. I've never done it but i've bailed out before getting stung majorly..

 

I once arranged to meet a girl .. i waited outside the BTS station for ages (she was late) and she turned up unexpectedly with a friend.. She also looked worse than she did in the photos.. Anyway i was pissed off and she suggested "we go kho san road for party".. i couldn't bring myself to tell them to bugger off so i just went with the flow. We got into a taxi and drove to Khoa San road in silence.. i had my suspicions that they were just playing me for a night of free drinks and they were confirmed when the taxi man came to a stop and the were no hand motions from the two girls to reach into their bags and pay the fare.. So i paid..

 

We were walking through a busy outdoors night market area full of people so i hung back and waited until they were both in front of me and i just casually changed direction and jogged off 

 

 

 

Edited December 2, 2016 by cheapskatesam

[Lamkyong]

3 minutes ago, cheapskatesam said:

 

Haha nice one.. I've never done it but i've bailed out before getting stung majorly..

 

I once arranged to meet a girl .. i waited outside the BTS station for ages (she was late) and she turned up unexpectedly with a friend.. She also looked worse than she did in the photos.. Anyway i was pissed off and she suggested "we go kho san road for party".. i couldn't bring myself to tell them to bugger off so i just went with the flow. We got into a taxi and drove to Khoa San road in silence.. i had my suspicions that they were just playing me for a night of free drinks and they were confirmed when the taxi man came to a stop and the were no hand motions from the two girls to reach into their bags and pay the fare.. So i paid..

 

We were walking through a busy outdoors night market area full of people so i hung back and waited until they were both in front of me and i just casually changed direction and jogged off 

 

 

 

now that's more like it   discrete  etiquette 

[djayz]

Couldn't be bothered watching the video to the end, but from my experience it seems to be the person who is deemed to have the higher status and or more money foots the tab - irrespective of whether it's a farang or Thai. I have been out to a few really good dinners where a Thai paid the bill. 

I suppose it depends a lot on WHO you go out to dinner with...

 

Edited December 2, 2016 by djayz

[Lamkyong]

surprised no one  has elaborated on the ladyboy aspect yet

 

 

god they were uggs

 

[ezzra]

Rule of thumb in Thailand when going out with Thais  family members to eat and drink,

( her family members, and a number of them too, smelling a free grub )

is to be fully prepared to fork for the bill, and leave a handsome tip so not to

embarrass the GF/wify and save face, of you be labeled a major Ki Ni Yao Farang....

[thaibeachlovers]

Thai "culture" as defined by my wife always involved me paying for everything. I went along with it for the first years of our life together, as she worked long hours for sod all ( like most Thais ) and it was just us, but when it started to encompass paying for her family, I made it clear that wasn't going to happen, and the end came suddenly, in every way, for our marriage.

I still don't know if she just got tired of being married to me or if it was a long con, but same result either way.

I'm just really happy we didn't have an atm anchor ( baby ).

[impulse]

32 minutes ago, djayz said:

Couldn't be bothered watching the video to the end, but from my experience it seems to be the person who is deemed to have the higher status and or more money foots the tab - irrespective of whether it's a farang or Thai. I have been out to a few really good dinners where a Thai paid the bill. 

I suppose it depends a lot on WHO you go out to dinner with...

 

True.  I work with a bunch of professional Thai people in BKK and Songkhla and I can rarely pay the tab unless I get up in the middle of the meal and sneak off to the cashier under the guise of hitting the head.  Same thing in China where the income inequality is similar.

 

The Thais I work with enjoy taking long lunches which drive me crazy, so I often leave a wad of cash with one of them to pay the check, and head back to the office.  More often than not, I get back the entire wad.  I always get back at least enough to indicate I paid only my share.

 

Full disclosure:  I don't have any experiences with non-working Thais or any extended families.  These are all colleagues on better than average Thai salaries.

[bluebluewater]

I knew on gal who loved to see how much she could get away with.   I was invited to lunch one time but I made sure I arrived late and you can be sure that there was full table of family and friends waiting for me and my money.   But of course being Thai they had all ready got their hands on the menu and ordered no telling how much food.   I said hello to everyone and made introductions to those I did not and then without so much as a sip of water I begged off that I had to leave.  The gal followed me out to me motorcycle, begging me to stay, and complaining that there was going to be a big bill.  

 

 "Big sorry!  Gots to go!"

[colinneil]

One time when i arrived back in Thailand after a few months working in the UK, my ex-wife said tonight we eat in a restaurant

ok i said,.

When we arrived there were 11 other Thais already eating, drinking Jonnie Walker black label.

Who are these people i asked ohh they are friends here to welcome you back to Thailand.

I do not know any of them, and who is picking up the bill??

You are the farang you pay, ha ha ha says i, no bloody way, bye bye i went home left them to sort it out.

[Kwasaki]

1 hour ago, cheapskatesam said:

is Thai etiquette for the Farang to pay for everyone.. 

 

Never given it any thought and not something that l know of,  l  pay only when l think it's appropriate,  paid for girlfriends in my company in the past,  paid for Thai family when out somewhere when married, now a few of my family treat me.  

[YeahSiam]

I've not been in the pay for dinner situation but I have been in variations on the theme.

A little while back, I ran into a gik who was drinking with a group of friends and, before you know it, the friends were ordering more drinks/shots/cigarettes etc and the mouthiest of them presented me with the bill when the waitress came back.

I'm like "are you on f****** drugs? Pay for your shit yourself"

Mouthy bird's jaw hit the table, gik almost collapsed in a heap on the floor laughing.

Turns out, her friends figured she didn't know me and, consequently, I ought to pay for the "privilege" of her and their company.

[kannot]

2 hours ago, Lamkyong said:

surprised no one  has elaborated on the ladyboy aspect yet

 

 

god they were uggs

 

who  cares  he  seems happy with the  situation

[Mitkof Island]

The easy answer is NO! The first word you need to use in Thailand is NO, NO , and NO! This is the oldest trick in the book and you are a sucker if you fall for it. Always make sure you are taking her out alone. Alone means alone not her girlfriend or the entire family. Learn to say alone in Thai. If you show up at the restaurant and suddenly everyone starts showing up leave or make an excuse you have to use the toilet and disappear. Afterwards just avoid the bitch. Then repeat after me. I am not a human ATM. I am not a human ATM. The guy in the video is an idiot. "I don,t understand anything their saying"  Likely "We just found another falang sucker"

Edited December 2, 2016 by Mitkof Island

[Mitkof Island]

3 hours ago, ezzra said:

Rule of thumb in Thailand when going out with Thais  family members to eat and drink,

( her family members, and a number of them too, smelling a free grub )

is to be fully prepared to fork for the bill, and leave a handsome tip so not to

embarrass the GF/wify and save face, of you be labeled a major Ki Ni Yao Farang....

A big D ?

Edited December 2, 2016 by Mitkof Island

[overherebc]

3 hours ago, KarenBravo said:

When this happens and you realise you are being used by a woman and her mates, start ordering the most expensive items on the menu.

Once you have finished your tender, Wagyu steak, excuse yourself to either go to the toilet, or have a cigarette in the parking lot.

Then, do a runner leaving all the people that played you for a fool with a massive bill.

 

many years ago 6 'friends' ( 3 couples) just happened to turn up at the restaurant.

At the end of the meal the bill was put in front of me.

I divided by 4 put that on the table and walked off to the car. End of short relationship. 

[kannot]

2 hours ago, impulse said:

 

True.  I work with a bunch of professional Thai people in BKK and Songkhla and I can rarely pay the tab unless I get up in the middle of the meal and sneak off to the cashier under the guise of hitting the head.  Same thing in China where the income inequality is similar.

 

The Thais I work with enjoy taking long lunches which drive me crazy, so I often leave a wad of cash with one of them to pay the check, and head back to the office.  More often than not, I get back the entire wad.  I always get back at least enough to indicate I paid only my share.

 

Full disclosure:  I don't have any experiences with non-working Thais or any extended families.  These are all colleagues on better than average Thai salaries.

Whats  "better than average"....just interested, no  other  motive

Edited December 2, 2016 by kannot

[wump]

Depends on the kind of people you hang out with. I once had lunch with some Thai friend and her nurse friend and a doctor. The doctor insisted on paying for all. So I guess this is more of a status thing than a Thai/farang thing.

[bridge2bridge]

NO it is just another way Thai's rip off a FARANG.

[al007]

ABSOLUTELY of course everyone thinks the foreigner is going to pay

 

Preferably at the beginning of the meal get out a big wad of 1000 batt notes, let everyone see

 

OR despatch one of the ladies to the ATM with your card and PIN, and tell her to bring back 20,000batt

 

Everyone will love you they will order food and waste it and when they go you can be assured they will return for more

 

What rubbish many will say, well only equal to the original post is the foreigner expected to pay

 

A fool and his/her money are easily parted and soon become broke

 

TRY AND LIVE IN THE REAL WORLD

[YeahSiam]

1 minute ago, bridge2bridge said:

NO it is just another way Thai's rip off a FARANG.

 

Sweeping generalisation.

It depends very much on the class of Thai you're hanging out with.

If you're cheek by jowl with peasants, you'll encounter this type of behaviour far more regularly than if you rub shoulders with better-off Thais.

[whatproblem]

Don't be a pussy ,if your date brings friends tell them to go ,when it's bed time she won't let her friends in ,I'm talking girls .

[Nemesis7]

When will you people learn! Here no money no honey mostly. Hardly exceptions and that's the truth 

[jolive]

Free meal con..

I had the same experience as you guys here.. a date with a gal turn out to be a date with a bunch of people that I dun even know.. those so call (friends) accompanied my date have no problem ordering dishes that they will never order when having dinner amongst themselves.. To me I'm ok as this will be the last time out with this gal as she really gave me bad impression.. few days after that dinner, she call me out for dinner again and I told her that I dun have a printer at home that print money and I'm not a walking ATM so good bye..


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[bark]

If you have money, always good to Pay. If not don't go out.

But the choice is yours.

[rijb]

4 minutes ago, jolive said:

Free meal con..

I had the same experience as you guys here.. a date with a gal turn out to be a date with a bunch of people that I dun even know.. those so call (friends) accompanied my date have no problem ordering dishes that they will never order when having dinner amongst themselves.. To me I'm ok as this will be the last time out with this gal as she really gave me bad impression.. few days after that dinner, she call me out for dinner again and I told her that I dun have a printer at home that print money and I'm not a walking ATM so good bye..


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You missed your chance.  You should have asked her to spend the night.  And then invite all your friends.