The Funny Things The Girls Say!

[Up2U]

And, does any of your significant others completely mix Thai and English even in one sentence or even mid-word?

We do it too, even though I'm forbidden to speak Thai. Probably the most intimate fusion was my wife's reply, 'I ก็ love you'. I think that's a more intimate fusion than 'Mummy's waiing phra.' (I'm not sure how to say the latter in English; I suspect that 'praying' is not the right word.)

Our daughter came up with a lovely mixed phrase - 'water farang' for 'squash'.

I can only think of one word blend - 'salap' = E. sleep / Th. lap (หลับ).

A shop assistant once replied 'No mee' for 'No have' or 'mai mee'.

Are you sure the 'Salap' wasn't followed by a 'Salay'?

[Richard W]

Yes.

[jayenram]

On my wife's first visit to England, we were driving along the M 56 by Stanlow when she says "look, ships". We were close to the Manchester Ship Canal but I couldn't see the ships that she was referring to. I said "where?" She said "the ships, over there in the field"

It was the first time she had ever seen sheep!

[ambassador]

Another recent case of Thai Word Muddle I experienced was when I was asked if I had a 'sikhalette.'

"Do you have a sikhalette?" She asked.

"Only menthol" I replied, much to her confusion...

She was asking if I had a secret.

[belleben]

this is fun.

Thais call beef & meat by using the same word "Nue". That's why she talks strangely.

[belleben]

However, it's like listening farangs gossiping thais.

[penzman]

I see nothing wrong with this and I'm sure we also provide great entertainment to our Thai friends in our daily attempts to speak Thai.

We eat at the same shop every day and have become great friends with the family who runs it. There are quite a few shops next to it and a park for kids to play. Two women who were having beer next door decided to take a pee in the bushes. The shop lady told my gf who then translated to me , " They better watch out for the snake not to bite their kisstoris"

[BIG SPUDS]

Ive told my GF that she is number 1 in my world and should take no s**t from no one , and that she is really special to me and i will always put her before me.

Guess my new name????

Number 2!!

Asked for it really i suppose

[Padkapow Guy]

My wife calls the tv remote control the " birth control"

Aso she calls walgreens " greenwall" and at nite when I snore to load she elbows me in the ribs and tells me to "tip over".

[chanchao]

All these posts on "what The Girls say".. Don't Thai guys say anything in English (or Tinglish)?

[jayenram]

My FG occasionally helps her friend (who is quote "mai dem baht") with her English. They were rabbiting on the stoep the other day and I heard the word "trorry". I said "what are you trying to teach her?" She said "trorry, like we have when we go shopping"

[ThaiFarmer]

This morning my wife woke me up saying that slumabit(son of a b*tch) labbit(rabbit) ate my loses(Roses). If I catch him we are going to have labbit stew.

Hi fellows,

Last Saturday I printed out all the stories from "The funny things the girls say" and my Thai wife and I red it together in the evening. And I can assure you it was many years ago since we laughed that much. We could hardly speak at all after a while. We just pointed at the story and laughed and laughed with tears falling down our cheeks. These wonderful Thai girls are so funny without knowing it. And we love them for that. We sure don't laugh at them in a bad way if someone thinks that. And I'm sure they laugh at us too when we try to speak Thai. And that's OK!

Our no 1 is the one quoted above. I had to leave the room and go out and wash my face in cold water to stop laughing. My wife and I still say "labbits" and "loses" when we see them. Please say hallo to your wonderful wife from us Padkapow Guy. She really made our day!

My wife has said some funny things too. But unfortunately for the most of you it's in Swedish so I will keep the stories to myself! Now after 22 years in Sweden she almost speaks better Swedish than I do..............!!? How funny is that???

[ChiangmaiJim]

I have to say that I have had loads of laughs due to the language and cultural differences!

eg. Last year we were preparing to move into our new house and I had been making inquiries as to what we could do and what we couldn't in or to our new property, and basically you can do what the **** you like, therefore I started to ask her a few questions like can I do this? and can I have this? and always the answer was, "You can do what you want" Therefore trying to push the point I then said that I would like to buy an elephant and keep it it in the garden! At this she turned and said "You can't keep an elephant in the garden" I then asked her as to why I can basically do anything I want but I can't have an elephant, she replied "It will sh1t all over the garden"!!!

Another problem word for her is festival, it comes out vegetable! and there's lots of both in Thailand

Also my friend's wife was pointing out the different fruit trees etc. whilst out driving one day, as we passed some rubber trees she described them as "Tree make the shoe"

I could go on.

Be happy.

[Insight]

I got an email a while ago from a Thai college with a subject entitled "Can you do me a flavour?" - I still don't know whether it was intentional or not

Still, had to reply "Ham & Cheese"...

Remember once picking up a pirate PS2 game from Pantip. The blurb on the back said "Are you really?"

(Ready, really... maybe...)

[Insight]

And before I forget, our receptionist sent an email to everybody a few weeks ago informing us that the office maid was off sick. It read something like...

"The maid, P'Gan, is not feeling well today so you'll just have to do everything yourself."

Don't beat around the bush

[tatom]

One day my wife was practising her English and read a sign saying "lestaulant" (restaurant). I said, "its not lestaulant, its restaulant".

[ericd]

My ex Thai wife had been living with me in the UK for about a year. She had been going to college to learn to speak and read English for about 6 months when:-

We were at the supermarket checkout together and she kept on pulling out a bag of sugar from the other groceries and refusing to let the cahier put it through the till. We both asked her why? She pointed to a nearby display of a completely different product which in large letters pronounced it to be " SUGAR FREE" !!!

On another famous occassion we were in bed together and I passed wind. She turned over and said:- " How many dog die stomach you?"

[NedKelly]

After I introduced her to Yoghurt and Muesli and fruit all together with a touch of honey.........she now runs off to the kitchen and organises some toast to break up and put in as well........makes me shake my head every time !! haha

[tatom]

We used to live in the US and my mother really loved my wife. I think it was her innocense and honesty my mother liked. One day my mother telephoned and my wife answered. Mother, "Hello dear, is Tom home?". Wife, " yes, he's in the bathroom, sh*tting". Then, one evening, we went to visit my mother. We said we had been to the Lao temple that day. My mother asked my wife, "What do you do at the temple?" My wife said, "I do the dishes and talk to the other ladies and Tom smokes pot with one of the monks".

[Davidcharles]

My GF loves to do "The Rottely"

[farang noi]

My wife said, "I do the dishes and talk to the other ladies and Tom smokes pot with one of the monks".

Busted ey??? what did your mother say???

[Spoon]

I was staying at my gf's house near Surin on my last visit. We were at her aunties house talking ( I can only speak very limited Thai ), when my gf asks me in English "do you like feet"......

I was stunned for a little while, then I ask ... " what type of feet, chicken?".

after some explanation and hand signals, I worked out that she was asking me did I like fish.

Took 10min but she finally get her answer

"yes I like fish".

[george]

Air: Air con

aisa keem : Ice cream

all reddy : already

Apart-men: Apartment

Arap: Arab

Ayt-cream: Ice cream

Bar: Bar

Beer: Beer

Boom boom: boom boom

Bprien lock, bpen baan chan diaow nee! :I've changed the locks, it's my house now.

boy shee : bullshit

Cee-dee: CD

Coh-cain: Cocaine

Com-piu-ter: Computer

Condo: Condo

Condom: Condom

cork = coke

Da-wid Bek-hairm: David Beckham

Dow: Down (cash deposit)

Dee-wee-dee: DVD

E-mai: Email

Fut-born: Football

Furni-ture: Furniture

Gan-jah: Ganja

Gay: Gay

Gin Tonic: Gin & Tonic

Gof: Golf

Green Tea: Green Tea

Hab: have

Hello: Hello (when answering phone)

Huge Gran: Hugh Grant

Impossment : important

I Finit (I finit alleddy) : Orgasm

Internet: Internet

Karaoke : karaoke

Lesbian show: Lesbian show

Lif: Lift (elevator)

Lip-satik: Lipstick

Logo: Logo

Manches-ter U-nai-tet: Manchester United

Mar-ga-rin: Margarine

Wave: Microwave

mo-bii : mobile phone

Moto-cyc: Motorcycle

My flend yoo : Your friend

Offit: Office

Oi: Oil

Panda: Panda

Pep-see: Pepsi

Per-sen: Percent

Pik-ap: Pick-up (truck)

Plastic: Plastic

pla-sa-tik : plastic

Pro du surr : producer

prom-prem : problem

Promo-shern: Promotion (special offer)

Pussee : Pussee

Sa-deet: Sadist

Same same : same

Ser-ee-ert: Serious

Sexy: Sexy

skoon : school

spankamagetthi : spaghetti

Taxi: Taxi

Tek-noh-loh-yee: Technology

Tennit: Tennis

Tee-wee: TV

Thank you very big : Thank you very much

Too mud: too much

ub 2 yoo : Up to you

U make me Kham : I got orgasm

Wee-dee-oh: Video

Wai: Wine

[john b good]

Some years back I took my wife to the antipodes (her first time out of Thailand) and whilst down under I called up a few friends and started the conversation by saying "how are you doing" which to by dearly beloved sounded something like "howyadoin"

After a few of these telephone calls she said who is this person "howyadoin" you keep calling.

It's not only some of the local dialects here in Thailand which confuse people.

[eee-stuart]

try asking your issaan friends about the surname of the english football teams captain(when pronounced quickly)

[andy50]

hi guys,i went out with a wonderful woman in thailand,i taught her to say "turn to the left and turn to the right ,so we are travelling along on the m/cycle she used to shout,"turn to the wreff !--- or ---turn to the lii !. i used to stop the bike as i laughed so much!--should have married that woman!

[johng]

try asking your issaan friends about the surname of the english football teams captain(when pronounced quickly)

Buck hum !!!!

[cobra]

One of my crew's girlfriend was talking about the Weekend Market at "MoChit", (Bangkok), coming in late on the conversation all I heard was her saying ... I go to Mo Chit again ... I assumed this was a bathroom issue and maybe she was over sharing until I we realized she was talking about the Market, even she had to laugh when she understood our confusion ...

[Davidcharles]

it is really funny to read this forum to be honest.Cant stop laughing. I am

Thai and it is quite good to hear some opinions from farang who got thai wife. Hope you dont mind if there is a new face to join the forum.unfortunatly she is Thai. 

A big welcome to you vrsushi.

Hope you can have a nice time here and we can learn from each other.

Yeh! WELCOME......

[Davidcharles]

Pointing to her forehead, my lady said sadly "Look a big temple".

The Thai Air Hostess bowed and smiled sweetly "We hope you have enjoyed your FRIGHT".......

Bless 'em.