The Dark Lord

35 minutes ago, BEVUP said:

Yes all with out husbands knowledge encouraged by the voice - They would know what husbands answer would be 

They just don't know when their on a good wicket & just want more - For some crazy business or the banks about to seize the Aunts land 

My wife wife lies straight in my face - as mentioned prior car loan was coming to end after BIL failed to pay (unknown to me ) , thought i might up date car so spent an hour at Toyota & told a friend who also helped by looking on the computer. Or I could of set that amount away every mth for my sons Uni

But no & always at the 11 th hour i find ou the car was refinanced from a loan shark to pay of the bank & give the remainder to the Aunt 400 km away on the promise of 10 Rai (no proof at all ) 

So yet another 3yrs on car making it worth double the purchase price from about 9 yrs ago to know being 12 yr old & depressiating 

I share your pain there Bevup old chum.

my apologies to those fellow sufferers, who have had the strength of character to post their woes and experiences so brutally honestly on this thread,  for my absence. 

True ( how could any company in this country use that name when nobody here knows what it means or how to use it?) my ISP decided to stop the internet connection for just over 24 hours with the usual pre warning of ....oh yes sorry, no pre warning. So yesterday was not the best day for me. 

To update the situation, from the poisonous vicious and nasty screaming fits telling me to leave "her" house because of some imagined infidelity or intent  of infidelity have waned to be replaced by offerings of freshly cooked food outside the room as offerings ( which previously I would accept ) .

i have ignored them totally and I think this has totally confused her.

it follows my earlier prediction however that come bill time  she would come a begging 

still having that internal battle, pity Vs self protection.

more importantly than my and my perceived suffering is the  trials and tribulations that my friend Odysseus is facing. Dear O, my prayers and good thoughts are with you. 

4 hours ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

We are now a little off topic, and it's about good person in need of some support:

Interesting what you use as a "code of life". Of course the concept is in most religions but explained in different ways. Heaven and Hell, reincarnation as a cockroach, or forty virgins waiting for you for murdering innocent heathen swine in the name of allah (err sorry, maybe that one's the opposite).

Our friend has done his bit with this family time and again over years, he needs to look after himself before their self destruction obsession drags him into the abyss with them. I worry he seems to be teetering on the edge. It Is decision time, sink or swim.

Love is not about only giving, it is about respect. It seems his generosity has lost him any respect unfortunately.

They have had more than their pound of flesh, time to leave with no regret.

Get out while you still have the force with you Dark Lord.

Don't forget you bank books...

 

Hi GFC and welcome, if that is appropriate, to the thread. 

You are right in so in so many ways here, firstly with the cartoon which made me smile but then with the astute observation  about my state of mind. I continue to have that guilt trip that is so deeply embedded in my soul that I cannot get rid which keeps reminding me that when I leave she will spiral very quickly into abject poverty and suffering having squandered obscene amounts of money on clothes, shoes handbags and friends despite my multiple warnings that the "fountain of tang" was not endless. 

Then on the other hand my brain tells me that to stay here is going to end in tears, possible injury and definite misery right up to the time when the old body finally checks out.

i certainly am beginning to understand what it must be like to have a dual personality. 

I take your point about just geabbing the essentials however however how do you explain " going to the post office" with two treble and two bass guitars ( value about $2k each) in your hands?

what I have sorted so far is;

a) fully packed

 4wd car hire at about Bht 1000 per day ( need the space) 

what i I need to try and sort out now is somewhere to drop my cases and guitars, amps etc off for safe keeping whilst I bugger off back to civilisation for a quick break.

off on to the internet shortly.

thanks guys.

14 minutes ago, oldhippy said:

Yes about time that we farangs start to teach Thais some basic buddhist principles 555.

PS. I'm only joking, or maybe I am not.

 

Inspite of all her thainess, my wife recently said: "buddha is in the heart, not in the wat" and - "I believe what I see".

She seldom goes to the wat, yet spent 160.000 + 70.000 (envelopes) on our son's funeral (a large part of it went to the monks of course).

 

There is hope, but still a loooooooooong way to go.

For Europeans too, it was a struggle to leave the 19th century behind...

 

 

 

 

Old hippy dude, 

So sorry to hear about the loss of your son. It is not right that a parent buries their child, ever

my current wife lost her eldest just before I met her, her then husband did not even come to the funeral, she was in such a state that all the donations ( envelopes) and insurance payouts were stolen by an aunt and it was estimated to be several millions. But they are thai so she was forgiven.....

i believe you, Trans and the wise Owl to name but a few have got not only the patience of a Job ( some biblical reference)  but have a special gift. 

I struggled to leave the 20th century but that was purely due to me hitting 40!

I was often highlighted at my apparent patience in explaining matters with my staff who were mostly non English speakers as a first language.  I am pretty sure I got the message across eventually but all that legendary patience faded rapidly in the face of "the Issan crazy" 

Try as hard as I can to ignore it, my guilt at what lies ahead for her is trying very hard to overwhelm me. If it wins then I am back in this cycle again and that thought spurs me on to grow a backbone. 

BTW the expression Issan Crazy is not referring to the current Mrs DL but to a condition prevalent in Issan women. 

1 minute ago, NanLaew said:

How has this anything at all to do with your current situation?

Just trying to show that my former stressed up high pressure life and its demise was happier than the  anticipated but never achieved stress free hasstle free drift along the river of peace to the end life existence I planned for out here. 

Was my post not clear or are you just you just trying to piss me off?

24 minutes ago, zoza said:

Funny the way things go with the ladies from isarn I have been with my wife about 14 years now and I have had a few highs and lows

in that time and out of the twelve Farang/Thai couples who attended our wedding only us and one other are still together so the odds do not seem great, my wife is going through the menopause and life can get a bit tricky with her new found rage

and my need for the truth, I have got over the spoilt son syndrome and the family must be involved in any thing that involves me spending money. I am still not sure if we will still be together until one or the other dies.

but her three kids are not kids any more the youngest ends her schooling next year so that is one thing that should ease the pressure that their desire for money for nothing appears to pile on.

they are not bad kids but Thai tv and other media present most Farangs as multi-millionaires and they foolishly try and claim their share.

We hit a large bump in the road about a year ago, again over me not bending to a claim that it seemed the youngest had come out with.

it boiled down to me sending extra money that they tried to say I had agreed to which I had not agreed to and the ranting went on , and the constant phone calls kept coming (from family members since I had foolishly sold property in the UK and told the wife). 

so similar to DL I bought a ticket on line and made sure my wife knew about it, the chatter calmed down the phone calls offering to sell me land eased off and after a week or so my wife just said ok, yes it was a mistake 90% of the rows have stopped.

I have changed the date on the ticket we are practically back to where we where.

it was like roulette as I was honestly going to go and I will go in two months, and I might stay for a long time in the UK, nothing is

written in stone, and even though I love my wife she knows and I know that they will never bully me into giving in.

I hope all the TV members who have been in the main very helpful can gain from all our stories how best to get through the problems thrown up by our Thai/Farang relationships. cheers.        

Dear Zoza, welcome to the discussion ( if welcome is appropriate), I read your eloquent post twice thinking initially that you were describing my fun filled life here. 

I see you are contemplating the sensory retreat option similar to Our intrepid warrior and traveller friend Odysseus and the Dark one (me) 

i am pretty certain i will come back if not only for the uk tax break, but I can see no sensible way I can come back and continue to be treated like a dog, trash talked about in my face in front of or with strangers, walking on eggshells so as not to incur the sizeable wrath or the onset of another "the crazy" .

i mean that is not a life is it?

Back in the real world I was a senior manager for a huge international company. I was given complete regional authority for Asia, Mid East, Med and Europe ( one by one not all together) and I managed somehow to negotiate some pretty neat deals or union agreements or whatever was required without the histrionics I face today. 

I was happy then. 

Sadly due to global economic reasons the company started taking serious losses and whilst the owners were loaded, even they eventually called it a day and allowed themselves to be bought out and laying us all off as a result.

why can I not be happy now with zero stress, zero ling hour days, zero UK staff ( the worst i ever had) .........