fredwiggy

I was born in New Jersey, then moved to Texas after 30 years, then moved here. Men are still the leader of most households back home, as it should be, and if they are good men, the woman is their partner and not a slave. Only in single woman households should they be the head of household. When I moved to Texas, they actually said I was the one with an accent, when they have a southern drawl. My parents were from Brooklyn, and New Yorkers sound different than those outside of New York, as Bostonians do also. But from New Jersey I don't understand why they said I had an accent, although it was surely different from them.

The one problem with that , is that if some of us are "bumped off", we have others waiting in the wings to demolish the ones who did it. Some people think they can get away with anything, but that doesn't work with some. And not all women are cheaters. Maybe 40% tops, and men around 70%, which leaves a lot of people who know what morality means.

Maybe those who actually see what goes on here and know why people move away from Thailand by the thousands. Hardly moaning when you want a better life where you're guaranteed not to be made to leave someday.

If he would have said a knife or machete, that would be believable.

Your first sentence is true. If you choose a good partner, your whole life is better. Those who aren't so lucky and who end up with a bad one, live a life full of anxiety, abuse, greed, lies and deception. Attraction did me in, as it does many here, and it's why Thailand left a bad taste in our mouths. It isn't the country, food, some people or culture which is bad. It's certain things about certain people which ruins it. The schools are definitely below standards, and if you have a child here, better to take them out or send them to school overseas after enrolling them in a private international one here. Guarantees a much better future for them. The roads are about the most dangerous on earth, and will continue indefinitely this way until enough people in charge do something about it. The pollution from burning is also a major problem, especially for those with upper respiratory problems, and this also won't change anytime soon. Also the lack of care for human life , animals and looking at women as inferior here. Some see things just how they are, and some are blinded to what's actually going on because they have that good partner, rarely leave their villages or homes, and haven't run into trouble, yet. People like to see bad things change, and it isn't whining if they are things that affect much of the population, meaning the average locals and expats. I myself never whined about anything living in the US, and I'll be returning there none too soon, with my daughter, because of some of the things that go on here which will affect her future, and also mine.

American women aren't the dominant partner the large majority of the time. What they do is run the household most of the time, meaning making sure the kids get to school, cooking, cleaning the house. This isn't all of the houses though, as many men cook, clean, raise the kids etc, as I did. Teamwork is best wherever you live, with not one taking over besides the man being the head of household, besides single parent woman households. You saw only two out of millions, which doesn't give you a real picture of what goes on there. My ex tried controlling me here, and that is another reason we divorced.

I learned all the basics the first year I was here, as I knew things would be easier for myself and others I'm talking to.

I talk to 2 of her teachers because they speak English. My daughter isn't learning much in a Thai school anyway, as they are far from advanced like those in the US. This is one reason I will bring her to the US before she's 10, so she has a chance of a decent future she wouldn't have here. That's great parenting, staying here until we can both leave, instead of me leaving her here and going back myself.Assuming yet again.

A narcissist that lies, abuses, kidnaps your daughter 4 times so you have to divorce here to bring her back home, doesn't get along wit her own family, and goes from one man to another isn't coping fine. The only problem I had was actually trusting her, and having a child with someone who doesn't care about children besides the cash she gets from them. Try not to assume, as you did again.

When I go to a party, I'm with my girlfriend, who translates for us when they ask me questions. Life here is as boring as it gets anyway.

That I can do, plus many others, like ordering food. Like I said, it hasn't been bad as far as communication, as I always have my phone if needed.

Not wanting to learn Thai isn't a negative if your partner speaks your language, as she should, if you want to have a close relationship. Anyone can use a phone translator to ask questions if they are alone here. It also doesn't make you illiterate, deaf nor mute. Some people just don't care to learn another language. Thai isn't easy to learn unless you put the time into it. If you aren't with a wife or partner here that speaks your language, then it would be a good idea to at least learn some basics, although again, you can get along just fine if you use your phone. Many Thais can't speak anything besides Thai, and they aren't looking at us as illiterate, as they also can't speak our languages, which makes us even. I've been here over 6 years and have gotten along okay using my phone for words I don't know. My ex spoke only a little English and that was part of the problem. My girlfriend now speaks very good English, which makes things a lot better as far as communication, which is one of the most important things in any relationship. From reading many of your posts, you seem to assume a lot of what goes on in other's lives. This isn't something anyone can do, as you don't live with anyone 24/7 besides your own partner, if that. Most people who live here probably haven't any paranoia. We know many of those, especially the older locals, don't like us around for one reason or another, this coming from old school prejudiced thinking. This doesn't mean all of them, as I see for myself how accepted I am around my village. I'm courteous to everyone here, and couldn't care less what anyone thinks, as I'm the one fitting in with the way I act. I don't think anyone but a narcissist thinks Thais should lay out the red carpet for us. While living here, we are again, just trying to fit in. Some cause trouble, as they probably do in their own countries. Road signs here are in Thai and English, and those that aren't are easy to understand, as the sign itself can be international in appearance. The real danger on Thai roads are the locals and their inability to drive safely, and the lack of enforcement of existing rules. Most foreigners already know how to drive well coming from other countries where laws are enforced, and testes to get licenses are harder. Some speed no matter where they live, and drive drunk, and this isn't a good thing anywhere. Try not to assume, because the few you know about aren't but a fraction of what's here. As far as the OP's question, the only reason I'm here is because I'm waiting for the right time to re-locate back in the US with my daughter here.

I thought you lived here. Do you rent? If not, then you paid, or are paying, for a house you can own, but not the land under it. If you left, you would have to sell the house and split the profits with your wife, so she will get some cash., unless you divorce and decide to stay in the house. The house will most likely still be in her name, so she will get something if you leave and sell or die. The same happens in the west, with a better chance of the woman ending up with a house you paid for in the event of a divorce. I luckily bought my house in Texas a week before we were married, so it was mine. If you are renting, you are paying for both you and your wife to live there, and it's money thrown away, besides having a roof over your head while you stay, because when you leave, you get nothing.

I've drank wine most of my adult life, in moderation mostly, and always thought wine was good for you in small amounts. The research back then matches it today. I\ve never had any health problems besides sore joints from lifting and an H Pylori infection , likely from the water here. Here's one link with some data..................https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/265635#blood-pressure

Freedom of speech,along with gestures, should be worldwide, as it shows freedom, which should be everyone's right. Everyone has the right to protest a corrupt government, justice systems, politicians or any other officials that are doing wrong, and doing this, although it comes from weak minded sheep who follow those who hate, should be allowed. It will show others how people think, and who should be labeled as toxic and better avoided.

It must take you an awful lot of time to check all those kids bikes.

That's true but not for a simple reason. A damaged woman does not feel good about herself. Low self esteem coming from her childhood and or previous relationships with men. You can treat her like a queen. Loving, caring, trusting, building her up, protecting her, and she might still not be able to let go of her past.

Exactly. My mistake was trusting her. The only reason I am still here is waiting until I can move back home with my daughter. The longer you take getting to know her, the more red flags will arrive, or they won't. I only visited my ex for a month at a time a few times before I moved here, doing exactly what others warned about in forums. Pretty face and good body threw me for a loop. Lies and seeing how she treated her previous children (giving them away young) should have told me enough. The first time she hit me because she was mad at her mom was another red flag, with coming at me with a knife added on. After I moved here, and the house was built, the real her came out in bright colors, but I wouldn't for many reasons leave my daughter here with her. Like you said, some can hide what they really are for a long time, especially those with narcissist personality disorder. Love bombing you until they get what they want, they turning on you like the Third Reich.

Don't fix what ain't broken.

The most important thing in a man -woman relationship is trust.If you don't have that, the relationship falters and dies. Compatibility is important. Closer to your age does mean something, but here they really only want someone to take care of them, as many aren't full time employed. Future plans have to be in sync, or there will be constant arguments until someone gives in, and that will also ruin the relationship. My own mistakes were not getting to know them well enough before I committed, meaning attraction did me in. I do know the most important thing in a woman's life, so she can get along with her future men, is her relationship with her father. If he was a caring, loving, non abusive man, she will look for that in her adult relationships, and will relate better to men in them. If her dad was absent, abusive or neglected her, she will always look for that perfect man, who doesn't exist, to replace her not perfect dad. Every relationship I've ever had where there was conflict, it was traced back to that absent or abusive dad. The others that were okay had dads, and usually moms' who were there for her when she grew up. Here. so many dads are absent so finding a good partner is extra hard. Some may be okay for awhile, because the foreigner is taking better care for her than any local did, or at least can support her better, but eventually that fantasy wears off, and she will return to form, and start nitpicking things, with self destructive, sabotage behavior that will ruin the relationship.

Actually it's getting the police to do their jobs. Doesn't take money but the threat of a job loss. This will take many years to change because they really don't care about life here. Just the one case of letting children sit on top of the school buses is enough for most any country to get laws enforced, let alone the 65 or more than die daily, most of them scooters or motorcycles and most without helmets.

Or picked up the STD from someone after her.

Have you noticed the ponds they get fish from daily here, especially after draining the rice ponds after harvest? The same waters they fish, get snails in and swim have a lot of bacterium that can enter body openings.

True, if you aren't a good swimmer and can control the person, calming them down so you can help, it could be bad for both. Two people together can help another.

If I wasn't at home, I would do the same. Been awhile since I drove to Sisaket to have one, but I will surely have some burgers, lasagne, Thanksgiving dinner, BBQ and Mexican food when I go to Texas next month.