StreetCowboy

What's the maximum width? Maybe they could ship it on its side?

Where I come from, we call them “assassins”. Back in the day, I was walking in to the office, and I saw an honest worker taking great caress he marked out and cut paving slabs. ”I say, my good man,” I called out to him. “I see you are marking out your slabs with commendable care and diligence, but did you know that at the National Physics Laboratory we can measure with an error of one millionth of an inch?” ”Nae good in this job, pal. In this job ye’ve got tae be dead on”

Back in the day I was passing through Hong Kong and I stopped for a beer in what was once my local. I got chatting to the chap next to me and he says: "Whear yew from?" "Scotland" "Nawyernut. Yerfrim Ireland" "Listen, pal. You're from Belfast, and you ought to know the difference, but I'm telling you, I'm from Scotland" I don't recall the rest of the conversation, but there was nothing requiring medical treatment, and I don't associate it with a missed flight, so it must have been bland. Bland enough. SC

Modesty and politeness get more no-score draws than fitness gets wins. Have you ever played the football pools? SC

it's gentrified now. I'm guessing if you drank you'd be struggling to get a pint for three pounds in Leith now. I think in your case you could still get into a fight easy enough, though. SC

I am not sure anyone deserves a good beating, but you may be more qualified as a moral judge than I. Back in the day, my country gave up on corporal punishment, and I don’t think that thugs are any better qualified to administer judgement than courts.

Maybe he was not aware of the price of ladies’ drinks; maybe the price of drinks was not clearly displayed in the bar. Maybe someone had offered him drinks, and he was more intoxicated than he had planned. I often find that drinking leads to poor arithmetical ability, and also misjudgement, and even misunderstandings or mistakes.

The solution is probably more important than the root cause.... D'ye think it was the three rotations to starboard at the Tin Hau Temple to avoid capsize that finally solved the problem? I've bought new self-adhesive patches since my last puncture and failed repair, though I don't trust them. I also bought new tyre levers, forgot that I had done so, and bought more. I'll need a bigger top-tube bag for all this stuff...

Since the OP has not posted since July, I think we can assume that either the problem has gone away, or the bike has gone in the bin. If the former, then a close-out comment from the OP may be helpful for others suffering similar problems, @Maybole

How is your trip planning going? I hope you have a great time, but more importantly, raise a good contribution.

Prescience becomes nostalgia

I reckon if you drink less than your doctor, you're doing ok. But make sure that your surgeon drinks less than you do.

I don't think going into the garden is that dangerous. But I'm not going to come to a barbecue at your house, just in case...

The Tattoo is fine, depending on the weather

Small things

The present will always be a foreign country for those that live in the past.

My apologies to those of you who have heard this story before so many times, but like your grandmother’s stories, they’re so much more fun when you can sing along. I was walking up Sukhumvit Road on the even side, and I noticed a “Scottish” pub on my left. I went in and the cigarette smoke was so thick, I thought I’d been tear-gassed. It was brightly lit, with a linoleum floor - just like back home! I bought a pint of Singha, and looked about me. ”Whair’re you go?” ”Hong Kong…” ”Hong Kong? Ah wiz 22 year wi Swire Pacific - d’ye Ken Swire Pacific?” ”Yes - Cathay Pacific airlines and the Coca Cola franchise. Are you retired here now?” ”Aye; afore that Ah wiz in Hong Kong, twenty-two year wi’ Swire Pacific. D’ye ken Swire Pacific?” We did a couple more laps of this while I finished my Singha, and the fact that the pub’s gone now is not the only reason I’ve not been back.

If you’re going to wax, then waxing eloquent is as good a way to wax as any

It’s easier than golf, and the guys in the clubhouse don’t scrutinise your score card the same way

Here’s the route, for 4th December Spitalfields in SS22 is a new addition to the route. We’ll go through the University to Bangsar and Gravy Baby, with a diversion via Lucky Garden Roundabout ending at Gravy Baby - always a generous crowd for the collection From there, along the Never-Ending River of Life to Bukit Bintang in the centre of town and then from there the longest stage to The Social in Desa Park City; Bukit Tunku is a lovely leafy suburb, and we’ll be going there by the gentlest route. There are then hills past the Duta Government Offices, but you’ll be pleased to know that the rat run past the school on the way into DPC has been opened up, so no need to alight. The back road through the village has been closed by construction these last few years, so we’ll be coming down the highway to TTDI - I must remember to go through the toll gates and onto the back road, to avoid the new DASH highway entry lane, which makes the LDP highway really quite fraught. That’ll take us to the newly-named Belland… and finally back to Sid’s On The Hill, where it all started, eight years ago

Pistils at dawn. or at Dawn. I will never view another cinematic duel in the same way again. I will forever think "Should've chosen pistils". Only Monty Python could have filmed such a scene with integrity, and even then I am sceptical whether it would have stood the test of time. Test of thyme.

Resistance is futile; even if you complain, no-one listens, so you might as well not bother. Our brothers and neighbours in the Ukraine have proved both wrong.

How often has your mugger needed to use his knife in self defence? I don't want to get involved in a gun fight or a knife fight - that's how people get killed.

How happy is Kwela music? You have to laugh, or else you'll cry

That's the sort of talk that gets you into fights. I could kid myself that I could deck anyone I squared up against, but I could not kid myself that more people would jump in on my side than on his. You should not need to come to Thailand to learn that, and you should not need to learn that the hard way. SC