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Which bars to meet 'decent' girls?


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Your suggestions as where to meet 'decent' Thai women has come too late for me!!  Out on the town on Saturday night I met the cutest girl I have ever seen, who was .... a bar girl.

Had a great time with her wandering around Dusit zoo yesterday, and I think I need to re-assess my view of bar girls.

Can someone please hit me over the head and drag me back to reality?  (On second thoughts, leave me to my fun...)

Keep having fun!!!

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Still having fun!! Was over in Thailand for 6 days. Went down to Phuket for the weekend. (By the way, that place seems to have about 5 tourists on the whole island!! Terrible hotel business situation methinks...)

Ex bar-girl still continues to be 'ex'. Now doing English classes and being appreciative of my efforts to give her a job.  Not yet made attempt to extract bank account details from me (impossible to tell her..my mouth was full..)  :o

.... that lowered the tone of these postings yet again...

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First of all, I don't know what you mean by decent.  Second of all, if you are referring to a female that you don't have to pay for..... they don't exist.  You pay in one form or another.  Third, I have been to Thailand (and Cambodia), several times, and the girls are all different, mostly nice, at least compared to the ones in the U.S.  If what you are looking for is a lady that you can have a long term relationship with.... one that you don't share with anyone, well, good luck.  Ask anyone that has been divorced.... and here in the U.S.  That is most of us....  The best you can do for sure is to try for that long term monogamous relationship, and it is probably the same the world over regarding making it work.  It is probably true that you cannot take the bar out of the bar girl.  Meet girls elsewhere.  Try cafe's or libraries.  I have met Thai girls at these places... and you know what.... they all want money in some form of another.... and it is not just Thai girls..... I love em all.... but I understand what it's about.  You need to as well.   :cool:
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Simon, I hope you relationship works out, we all need to take a leap of faith sometimes!! But CALIFDANN is right, you guys do have to pay one way or another, usually monetary, sometimes emotionally & nearly always with your souls (ha ha ha) Simon, who is paying for her English lessons? This job she will get, will you be paying her salary? & will she be getting slightly higher money because she's your girl? This is all preferable to paying her the going rate for the night, but paying you will be. The only diff is this will be in the form of dates & gifts, which is no diff than if you date a girl back home. So as long as this is the only expenditure you have to incurr then go for it but as has been suggested in other posts, if it becomes another form of payment i.e my grandmothers sick/brothers had motorbike accident/mother needs urgent operation, then take care, if you pay once, you can be pretty sure that it won't be the last time.

I really hope she works out for you as everyone deserves to be happy, so good luck & remember, sometimes you have to think with your big brain (& not the little one in your trousers!) to see the bigger picture! :laugh:

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Agree with a lot that you say, but it's true across the world and not just in Thailand.  I 'paid' for my UK wife for 20 years - and am still paying and will do no doubt, until the day I die. So I'm prepared to follow a 'risky investment' with this Thai girl. But just giving her money is not the answer.  I prefer to invest in her future by paying for her English lessons and setting her up with an internet business such that what she gets in her pocket is down to her own hard work. Of course, it will be interesting to see whether she sticks with me once she is generating her own income  :o

But on a more general note...working as a bar-girl seems to be a total deadend job right now. I was in Patpong (and Patong) for several days last week and the dearth of bar customers indicates very bad news for these girls and the bars. I and my GF sat in a bar with friends and saw maybe only one customer bar-fine a girl each night! Not the sort of business i would want to work in...but then most of these girls don't have an alternative.

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I have eaten shheps eyes in Saudi,Bulls <deleted> in west Africa and even those novce little cock-roaches in Big C but think penus and chips a bit 2 much...still food for thought.vomit-smiley-008.gif
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Heard from my Thai gfs that thai women are famous for doing that... bar girl or no bar girl... hahaha.... apparently they had an interview on TV with men involved in these cases .... one men got it cut off because he focused too much on his work instead of his wife...  :o
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regarding the recent bad press, on penus removal,

am i at risk, having a blow job in  l.o. smiles .?  i was under the impression thai ladie,s  , are vegetarian .

 

     is nothing sacred

:o

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I'm new here...and all I can say is WOW..what a thread...very interesting !!  I live in Texas...and plan on leaving soon...the sooner the better!! I've been looking at several places...and Thailand is just one I've been looking into...and yes, I'm single (and pretty much stay to myself...homelife type of person)...and looking to find a woman to live the rest of my life with...but give up on the women here...period!!  I have enjoyed the comments, etc from this thread...most interesting, from different view points...points well taken  :D .

I will get back here as time allows (which isn't much)  :o .

Paradise

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Seems to be more and more alleged "decent" girls out and about these days, they will invariably tell you they are "Students" - which in Thailand covers many things, often a job description working girls use, - whilst in fact some do study, albeit 2 or 3 hours a day, maybe 2 or 3 times a week - just because she goes to Uni, does not make her a full time, decent, student !  These girls seem to favour more upmarket hangouts, such as Spasso, Rivas, 87, Q-bar, Gullivers soi 5 etc, and their prefered night out is friday - often they are not looking for an overnight with 1-2,000bt handout, but for a long term "sponser' or husband.  Again, just because she may not come from the bar, or does in fact study, in my experience, it makes no difference to the fact/odds that currently rates about 1 out of 6  I check on being loyal.  Also, just to confuse the 'farang' further, you will not get a Thai girl, be it in a bar/shop/office wherever, to say to you "Yes, I already have a very nice Boyfriend/husband" - in true Thai style, they will tell you what they assume you wish to hear   " Mai Mee fairn -  I dont have boyfriend"   -  they certainly are very good at keeping ALL options open !    Re agencies, have done some work for ; www.thaino1.com - and found them to be reliable, honest, and with a good selection of well vetted, and well educated thai women, who have mostly had only 1 thai boyfriend, who dumped them, so they are now on the lookout for the security which the feel a farang may provide.
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  • 1 month later...

I'm gonna go back to the original question regarding "decent" girls.

Once i was talking to a Thai man and he reckoned that ALL farang men in Thailand are after sex.

I asked why he thought that and his response was...

           What else would you be here for?

So maybe "decent" girls believe that also and leave the farangs to the bar girls,  ie.  they don't want to be pigeon-holed with bar girls?

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Morning glory - "pak boong" (just to be a pedantic bastard)- the veg that grows in lots of polluted canals and ponds with arrow-shaped leaves and is a must with somtam and lots of other Thai dishes.

But more importantly and back to the original thread - Si43 have you made this chick a "decent" woman yet and is it a happy ending? We need an update methinks.

BTW, there are millions of decent girls out there and they're not hard to find, but just like anywhere else in the world, you've got to wade your way through a healthy pile of them, before finding your soul-mate. Bars are just a welcome diversion from the task! Don't give up hope Si43, even if this one didn'twork out and ignore the cynical bastards who think all Thai girls are the same. I like your attitude to life and agree she is/was worth the risk. Now, what's the story morning glory?

:o

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If your planning on spending a long time here in LOS you need to open your eyes a little bit & accept every kind of human nature. You might not agree with all of it but you'll have to deal with it & maybe then you'll realise that not everything is black & white. Why they come here & what they do only they know but I know some guys who go with bar girls & they are just the kind of people I would know back home & then there are the ones I wouldn't go near with a 10 foot pole, here or in the UK. Everyone is different & in LOS for me that is the main attraction. You sound like you are new here & the shock of seeing the "trade" in Thailand gets to us all in the beginning but after a long stay you too will (hopefully) find yourself taking no notice the way I do too. :o

Sorry guys, feeling a bit maternal to you all today! :D

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OK - you asked for an update so I will tell it all!!

This ex-BG is no longer my girlfriend, but she is still a friend! No, she did not deceive me or steal my money:)

We stayed together for a couple of months and she was a really fun girl to be with, always happy and smiling.  But in private (ie in bed), there was little romance about her, and little technique!  It was as if I was still a customer...very mechanical!  I guess her time in the bar had not done her any favours when it came to forming romantic relationships:)

I could have simply sent her back to the bar, but I really don't think that would be the best thing for her in the longterm. And I still liked her very much!!

So instead she now works for me!  I needed someone to work in my new BKK office, and she has (so far), worked hard to improve her English and to understand my business etc. The work she is doing for me is something that I could not do (my Thai is still basic-level...). She receives a decent wage from me and remains a very good friend and worker.

I don't look on this time as a failure.  Perhaps her idea of a relationship would suit another guy, but it wasn't quite what I was looking for.  But by employing her, I am maybe helping her to save some regular money (ie send it to her family), and she is earning a regular (but not excessive) monthly salary. In return, she is helping me to launch my business into Thailand, so we are both happy bunnies:)

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Good on ya Si! You showed some faith in her, a good time for a while and gave her a job and so far, she hasn't let you down, apart from perhaps in the bedroom dept., but that's not so important as long as she's not the possesive type, & there are plenty more fish in the sea, anyway. The point is it has proved all those doubters wrong, who all along insinuated that every Thai girl is just out to rip the farang off, when this just ain't true. Just cos some people open themselves up to be ripped off, while others are doing there own "ripping off" without acknowledging it, shouldn't mean half a nation should be tarred by the same brush.

Faith in human nature has been restored!

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Thanks for your comments! She has not run off with the office computers yet :o She is working really well and using her own initiative to sort out problems etc. So I might not have a girlfriend but I have a good employee.
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