Understanding The Farrang In Thailand

[Unigirl]

HELLO

My first post and visit, was recomend by friend of my Fiancee.

I am about married I am Thai andd ahve now finish Uni and work in Hotel Recetion in Bangkok.

I want understand boyfriend as we marry soon, we go out now1 year, he is Canada and is 29 yrs, I am 23 yrs.

We have marriage in Bangkok with family and friends me and him, we stay Bangkok and live we both work.

Problem He want small wedd family me want all friends to go and his also, family me not want money for me but want him pay wedding.

What I do, I want marry him he angry say Thai want money him, not true, family me own 2 Hotel and house in Pattaya.

Papa m say he not pay wedding he not love me.

Help please.

Chaa

[natee1]

Maybe he love you but he not love Papa you.

[exp9696]

I think same papa ,he not pay for wedding he not love you

yep another FUNERAL ??

[the gentleman]

Unigirl - In a foreign marriage the father of the daughter usually pays for the wedding..............

Yes this is Thailand and the Farang always pays, but, have a small wedding and save him some money!

If you are well off, why wouldnt your father pay half and help his daughter out in this situation?

How many of your family have married farangs before?

[shopgurl]

Dear Chaa,

First may I say this is only my opinion and recommendation from myself, you do not have to take it but hope you will think about it.

First of all, you say that you know your fiance for only 1 year and you want to understand him, but you are engaged now to be married soon, this should be something you talk with him about and not other people. If you want to understand him, talk to him directly.

As for the wedding, I suggest you to think about why your father is not paying for this wedding, either because he knows well or some other reason that may not be clear now, but there should be a reason for it therefore it would be better to talk to your family to get this understanding from them.

I don't think it's the problem of who should pay for the wedding but it's more of being sure that both of you are ready to take this step. I know you are in need of help but asking this sort of question on this forum, of course it can only give you helpful suggestions but in the end it's your own work to figure out what to do, it's your life and you should be responsible for it.

Remember marriage is between two people and that needs understanding.

[Bluecat]

I don't think it's the problem of who should pay for the wedding but it's more of being sure that both of you are ready to take this step.

Agree, if the problems start THAT early, what will be next?

Anyway, since your boyfriend is Canadian, I guess only his close family will be able to attend the marriage in Thailand, hence he does not really want a "big" marriage where a few people will be his friends/family and the majority will be from your side.

If you want it that way, he does not really understand why he should pay.

It is maybe a bit selfish from his side. I do not know what are the rules in Thailand (marriage in Between Thai) but anyway, considering the comment of your father, I'm not very sure his integration into your family will be a smooth one.

And this is not really a good sign for your future together.

But as Shopgurl said, only you and your boyfriend know the exact situation.

[taxexile]

การประนีประนอน...............compromise.and if your dad doesn't go along with that then follow the advice of the post below and be prepared for your dad not to talk to either of you until the first born comes along.

[tutsiwarrior]

have the Canadian fiance fake a job assignment outside of thailand, get married at the Thai consulate then return home fait accompli...

buy a big box of chocolates to hand around to everyone Canadians and Thais alike as 'consolation' gifts. Ritual and tradition are OK when all parties are amenable, if not follow your hearts and <deleted> to the rest...

[samran]

sorry, I smell troll. Looks like a Farang trying to write in Tinglish. Plus, if papa did own two pattaya hotels, he would be throwing money around, especially for daughter.

[Bluecat]

sorry, I smell troll. Looks like a Farang trying to write in Tinglish. Plus, if papa did own two pattaya hotels, he would be throwing money around, especially for daughter.

I did not want to say it, Samran.

You never know.

But coming from a Thai, the remark has some weight.

[taxexile]

samran.... i think you are right. a uni graduate would write better english.

the only hotels that someone who speaks like this is familiar with are the short time hotels.

[natee1]

hah,hah,hah...

[samran]

sorry, I smell troll. Looks like a Farang trying to write in Tinglish. Plus, if papa did own two pattaya hotels, he would be throwing money around, especially for daughter.

I did not want to say it, Samran.

You never know.

But coming from a Thai, the remark has some weight.

nah, definetly the australian in me speaking Bluecat.

I have corrected written english work of nearly all of my thai workmates, and the and they write english using the same structure as Thai. Their writing has a certain tinglish "ring" to it. This post doesn't.

This post uses "Me Tarzan - you Jane" type of language. Too simple to be a Thai

[Polo]

sorry, I smell troll. Looks like a Farang trying to write in Tinglish. Plus, if papa did own two pattaya hotels, he would be throwing money around, especially for daughter.

If Papa owned 2 hotels in Pattaya, he would be so disgusted by the antics of Farangs in that city, he would shoot the first farang that went near his daughter.

An obvious Troll. Probably a fat sex tourist in Pattaya.

[phazey]

there are several ways to pay for a wedding without actually paying for it....iirc

but yes, the use of english written by a thai person was suspect, i'd expect more typos and less "speak how a thai speaks english - exactly" tbh.

[davethailand]

sorry, I smell troll. Looks like a Farang trying to write in Tinglish. Plus, if papa did own two pattaya hotels, he would be throwing money around, especially for daughter.

If Papa owned 2 hotels in Pattaya, he would be so disgusted by the antics of Farangs in that city, he would shoot the first farang that went near his daughter.

An obvious Troll. Probably a fat sex tourist in Pattaya.

what is your problem polo?

why live here if you don't like what goes on in thailand.

you can rant all you like until your blue in the face but your never going to change anything.

[natee1]

An obvious Troll. Probably a fat sex tourist in Pattaya.

...Or Polo's alter ego. Are you kissing a black cats posterior inthe foto or what is it?

[taxexile]

i doubt if polo lives here, his attitude is that of the sulky git , the teenage misery,the second year sociology student at some third rate uk university.

he is one joyless,humourless being.

[tuky]

I agree with everything said above, oh except for what polo says, I have yet to agree with that.

I thinking troll, no sound talking same same Thai peopern.

[Unigirl]

Help Please

Sorry Family own 2 Hotels in Bangkok and House in Pattaya, all business for renting.

I think paying for wedding will be good show good heart, everything else Papa pay for, even holiday after wedding in Samui Papa pay for.

I do not understand I have coisin who have 2 baby and now marry Western man from Germany, he pay 100,000 baht and pay parents 6,000 baht every month. Many Western man do the same, I have good job for Thai people 8,000 baht per month.

Papa buy me car for Wedding everything good.

Help Please.

[Bluecat]

Good analysis, Samran.

I half agreed yesterday.

I fully agree today,...

[Chaamman]

All Thais want paying.

Bluecat what sort of Bloke calls himself Bluecat, nothing constructive to say then.

[Boon Mee]

Help Please

Sorry Family own 2 Hotels in Bangkok and House in Pattaya, all business for renting.

I think paying for wedding will be good show good heart, everything else Papa pay for, even holiday after wedding in Samui Papa pay for.

I do not understand I have coisin who have 2 baby and now marry Western man from Germany, he pay 100,000 baht and pay parents 6,000 baht every month. Many Western man do the same, I have good job for Thai people 8,000 baht per month.

Papa buy me car for Wedding everything good.

Help Please.

You forgot to mention the sick buffalo!

[wolf5370]

UniGirl,

talk to him.

Ask him why he doesn't want a big wedding.

Most likely he doesn't want to be overwhelmed; one farang, six hundred Thais he doesn't know.

May be he will settle for a small wedding ceremony (family wedding), and a larger post-wedding party later.

You are assuming that his reluctance is due to meanness, it may have nothing to do with it - may be he hates crowds or simply wants a family affair.

[RDN]

I think paying for wedding will be good show good heart.

It's the Thai way: money = love

[Bluecat]

Bluecat what sort of Bloke calls himself Bluecat, nothing constructive to say then.

Duckthai   Posted on Mon 2004-05-10, 19:32:04  

Which type of sad geezer calls himself "lovelycutie or Bluecat" anyway.

Wize up and get a life, every bloody night, the same sad <deleted>

Are you related to that one also, Chaaman?

The threesomes of the decade, I admit,...

[elsie]

Unigirl, me thinks you troll

Graduated from a university. 23 y/o. Daddy owns two hotels in Bangkok and a house in Pattaya. From your writing, I have to say a high school kid still can write better than this. All the grammar and typos are not like a uni grad. Plus, Unigirl has never explained anything we doubt.

[davethailand]

All Thais want paying.

Bluecat what sort of Bloke calls himself Bluecat, nothing constructive to say then.

why are you in thailand chaaman, you obviously have no respect for the country or its people.

[natee1]

me thinking Unigirl go back univercity in Australia after him finish holiday Thailand. Unigirl gorhoc no good very very...

[samran]

All Thais want paying.

Bluecat what sort of Bloke calls himself Bluecat, nothing constructive to say then.

why are you in thailand chaaman, you obviously have no respect for the country or its people.

bluecat,

maybe he can change his name to "mun-chaa". Would probably suit him more