can i just leave?

[tlock]

My marriage hasn't worked out, and my wife is asking for crazy money to agree to an uncontested divorce (3 million baht for 1.5 years).  I've contacted several lawyers and am waiting to hear back from them.  I'm just wondering if any forum members know the ins and outs, what happens if I just leave Thailand?  We have started building a house that is not complete, but I don't want to continue making the stage payments if the wife won't agree to an amicable separation.  Yes I know I sound like a scumbag, but I offered 2 million baht ( there are about 1.7 million baht of payments left on the house, she will have 300,000 left and a brand new house).  

 

At this point I am wondering what would happen if I just left Thailand?  I don't need to be able to return, I'm over it :).  

Edited February 26, 2018 by tlock

[InMyShadow]

whos name is the house in

[tlock]

5 hours ago, InMyShadow said:

whos name is the house in

Her name.  It is not completed, it is in the early stages of building.  I'm not interested in recovering any assets in Thailand.  

[Apiwan2]

You're off your rocker.

Just walk away now and take your money with you
If your not planning on marrying soon don't worry about it

Sent from my SM-G935F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[swissie]

Is your marriage registered in Thailand and in your home country?
Are you sure you will not er-enter Thailand until a divorce has taken place?
Any kids involved?

You "disappearing", the lady is likely to file for an absentee divorce on the grounds of "abandonment" on your part.(Minimum waiting period 1 year after "abandonment", as I recall). Especially if she has found a new "Love of her life". If this scenario should unfold=good for you.
You could actually walk away, take your money and leave her with a half built house as far as compensation is concerned.
Could also send out a strong signal to other potential "gold-diggers" (some schemes don't always work out a 100%).
Of course you realise, if you should re-marry in your home-country before the divorce is finalized in Thailand, legally you would be committing the crime of bigamy. Uhhh!
Cheers.
PS: Looking at the situation (including your possible remedy) it was not a good idea to involve (Thai)-Lawyers. To them you are just a bad Farang, wanting to leave a good Thai Lady "high and dry". Would not be surprised, if the wife now already knows of your plans, while at the same time your lawyers will be charging you hefty legal fees, pretending to have "your best interest at heart". 

[jak2002003]

If you are not registered as married in your own country then no problem.. Just leave.

 

If you want to come back here and marry another Thai woman in the future  then there will be a problem.

 

I am gay, and have married a guy in the UK  Been together 20 odd years. Come over here and its not even legally recognised, so I can go and marry a Thai women.  I can have a husband and a wife!  

 

This, and all the horror stories about nasty divorces and gold diggers make me realise that marriage is very stupid and unnecessary.  If 2 people love each other and want to be together then they can.... they don't need the legal marriage nonsense.  

 

[abrahamzvi]

On 2/28/2018 at 12:08 AM, jak2002003 said:

If you are not registered as married in your own country then no problem.. Just leave.

 

If you want to come back here and marry another Thai woman in the future  then there will be a problem.

 

I am gay, and have married a guy in the UK  Been together 20 odd years. Come over here and its not even legally recognised, so I can go and marry a Thai women.  I can have a husband and a wife!  

 

This, and all the horror stories about nasty divorces and gold diggers make me realise that marriage is very stupid and unnecessary.  If 2 people love each other and want to be together then they can.... they don't need the legal marriage nonsense.  

 

I tend to disagree to an extent. It is true that if two people love each other they do need a licence to stay togrther, However, legal complications may arise in the case of death of one of the partners, in some countries visa issues are involved  and the same applies to adoption of children.

[petermik]

tlock........don,t walk RUN get the hell out of it

[Jip99]

9 minutes ago, petermik said:

tlock........don,t walk RUN get the hell out of it

 

 

+1

[Thanyaburi Mac]

"If you are not registered as married in your own country then no problem.."

 

Wrong!   Married is married, married in Thailand, and you're married in the U.S. at least.  No U.S. "registration" necessary, or even possible.

 

Mac

[Colabamumbai]

I was married. She wanted millions to sign divorce papers. Lawyer suggested give her something even 20,000 Baht. I refused. Six months later she caved and signed papers. I took my phone with more than 50 messages threatening me with death if I did not pay to the police. They called her in and gave her a talking to. No house, no kids.  Just leave.

[jak2002003]

1 hour ago, Thanyaburi Mac said:

"If you are not registered as married in your own country then no problem.."

 

Wrong!   Married is married, married in Thailand, and you're married in the U.S. at least.  No U.S. "registration" necessary, or even possible.

 

Mac

Really?  Glad I am not American lol.

 

 

[jimn]

7 minutes ago, jak2002003 said:

Really?  Glad I am not American lol.

 

 

Same as in the UK. You cannot register a marriage in a foreign country any more. You are legally married in the UK as well as Thailand. I cant comment on the rest of Europe

[timendres]

2 hours ago, Thanyaburi Mac said:

"If you are not registered as married in your own country then no problem.."

 

Wrong!   Married is married, married in Thailand, and you're married in the U.S. at least.  No U.S. "registration" necessary, or even possible.

 

Mac

While this is true, in order to cause the OP a measure of grief, his wife would need to arrange to be in the US, arrange lawyers, establish residency, and deal with the courts, in order to initiate some sort of divorce or other proceeding. Very unlikely any of that will happen. This is much more serious for the guy who took his wife to the States and she obtained a green card. 

 

I agree that he should hightail it back to the States, then communicate with the wife only when she is being reasonable, and make a financial offer that he feels comfortable with, to be paid only upon successful completion of the divorce. Only he can value their time together and the value of the divorce. Once she sees him leave the country, she will start coming to her senses.

[bandito]

On ‎2‎/‎27‎/‎2018 at 6:07 AM, tlock said:

My marriage hasn't worked out, and my wife is asking for crazy money to agree to an uncontested divorce (3 million baht for 1.5 years).  I've contacted several lawyers and am waiting to hear back from them.  I'm just wondering if any forum members know the ins and outs, what happens if I just leave Thailand?  We have started building a house that is not complete, but I don't want to continue making the stage payments if the wife won't agree to an amicable separation.  Yes I know I sound like a scumbag, but I offered 2 million baht ( there are about 1.7 million baht of payments left on the house, she will have 300,000 left and a brand new house).  

 

At this point I am wondering what would happen if I just left Thailand?  I don't need to be able to return, I'm over it :).  

Edited

 

Nothing will happen.

As it is a civil procedure nobody will stop you leaving.

Just leave and don't tell her.

This is Thailand and she can find ways to stop you by making it a criminal procedure.

For example, lese-majesty, drugs, etc. etc.

I did/had the same thing and divorced her in my country, came back to Thailand and registered the divorce at the Amphur.

That was it.

 

[jkcjag]

On the topic of divorce...some interesting information here ...in particular that in Thailand the husband committing  adultery is not mentioned as grounds for divorce...but the wife is??!!??!

Also "Irrespective the fact that the property is registered as a personal asset of your wife when the house was bought, in a divorce you may be entitled to a refund of all money invested that came from your personal property or part of the money that came from marital assets or marital account. "

 

https://www.siam-legal.com/legal_services/grounds-divorce.php

https://www.samuiforsale.com/family-law/divorce-in-thailand.html

https://www.thaicontracts.com/ask/23-family-law-contracts/25-what-happens-to-the-family-home-after-divorce.html

https://www.thaicontracts.com/ask/23-family-law-contracts/23-does-my-thai-wife-own-the-house.html

 

Extracts of interest:

 

"personal assets are automatically subject to an at least equal ('50/50') distribution in the event of a divorce or death (when there is no last will). Only maritall property is pursuant to marriage laws subject to an equal distribution when the marriage ends (มาตรา 1533 เมื่อหย่ากันให้แบ่งสินสมรสให้ชายและหญิงได้ส่วนเท่ากัน) as opposed to personal property (premarital property)).

 

If the divorce is uncontested I don't see anywhere that states that anything other that a division of existing assets is required. If your wife wants to contest the divorce to gain additional amounts then legal costs will be incurred, and would she be able to actually pursue that course?

 

It seems to me that apart from the land, which can only be in her name, only the existing assets need be evaluated i.e. the incomplete building, rather than including funds to pay for any future costs that may be incurred e.g. to complete the house.

[dfdgfdfdgs]

On 2/26/2018 at 11:07 PM, tlock said:

but I offered 2 million baht ( there are about 1.7 million baht of payments left on the house, she will have 300,000 left and a brand new house).  

 

Why did you offer anything?  More to the point, why did you get married in the first place?

[RobFord]

They pay less than 2 million baht when a police officer is killed.

 

Just leave. 

[Lacessit]

Nothing. She is making what the unions call an ambit claim. Just leave. She won't be able to follow you, and will probably be looking for the next falang 30 seconds after she realises you are gone, if she isn't already.

[BarnicaleBob]

Your best bet is to gather what money you can that is here is Thailand and go to your home country without telling her.  Once you have arrived in your home country, contact her and let her know you have left her for good because of her attempts to extort money from you.  Let her wait however long it takes to file for a divorce on her own for abandonment and your nightmare will end.   As others have stated, she will be wanting to remarry sooner or later and will in time file the abandonment divorce.  Don't give her anymore money, just go now as quickly as you can without letting her know.   

[Soneva]

Based on what you say, I think you should just leave, quickly and without saying anything.  

 

Ordinarily, I would say go through the legal process to finalize the divorce.  However, in your case you have already paid out substantially, and she is getting a partially finished house out of this.  You are at a disadvantage as a farang, and there are many ways she could extort money from you and exact revenge if she so chose.

 

Of course if you intend to remain here and possibly remarry here, then you will need a good lawyer and good advice from someone with experience. Otherwise, just extricate yourself from the situation, fast!

[PerkinsCuthbert]

Man, see how she's got you jerking around on her string? Get wise, get up, gather your stuff, salvage all you can and disappear. She won't - she can't - come after you.

[likeke]

Run Forrest run. Go back to your country and don't tell anyone. Don't look back. And stay the hell out of Thailand forever. You don't need it. Oh yeah, don't get married again. 

[Pinot]

You offered 2 million for a year and a half of marriage?

 

Leave. Step out the back, Jack. Make a new plan, Stan. Set yourself free. 

 

Offer 100k baht if she'll sign the divorce papers. She will eventually. Keep your 2 million. 

 

Enjoy the rest of your life, the Thai chapter is over. 

[JAZZDOG]

You Just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
 

[maximillian]

6 hours ago, petermik said:

tlock........don,t walk RUN get the hell out of it

...and don't give her any money.

[maximillian]

2 hours ago, BarnicaleBob said:

Your best bet is to gather what money you can that is here is Thailand and go to your home country without telling her.  Once you have arrived in your home country, contact her and let her know you have left her for good because of her attempts to extort money from you.  Let her wait however long it takes to file for a divorce on her own for abandonment and your nightmare will end.   As others have stated, she will be wanting to remarry sooner or later and will in time file the abandonment divorce.  Don't give her anymore money, just go now as quickly as you can without letting her know.   

And if SHE wants to re-marry, you ask 2 million from her for a divorce.

[anon537687643]

Just get out of the country


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

[Soneva]

2 hours ago, Pinot said:

You offered 2 million for a year and a half of marriage?

 

Leave. Step out the back, Jack. Make a new plan, Stan. Set yourself free. 

 

Offer 100k baht if she'll sign the divorce papers. She will eventually. Keep your 2 million. 

 

Enjoy the rest of your life, the Thai chapter is over. 

As far as I can see, returning to Thailand for a “next” chapter of life would be possible if ex-wife files for divorce on the grounds of abandonment, and enough time passes for this to blow over.

 

Of course, in that case the OP had better make sure he does not live anywhere near her again in the future!

 

Step out the back, Jack. Make a new plan, Stan.... is definitely the solution!

 

[IAMHERE]

Do Not tell her of your plans, take your valueables, passport, big money and leave everything else. You can buy new shirts, luggage, toothbrush, etc...  She will have you arrested with false charges if you let her know you are leaving for good. You have to go somewhere for a few days to meet friend, to visit hospital, to assiste sick relative, etc... try you best not to be obvious.