Relationships and age differences, a personal case study

[Kadilo]

1 hour ago, Justfine said:

18 to 20yos should party with 18 to 20yos.

Yeah I agree but go home with the older bloke. 

[NonthaburiBear]

3 hours ago, GoDucks said:

This thread has probably passed its due date.  I can see the justification of those who have said I have been bragging.  I do not THINK that was ever my intention.  I think my motivation has been to show that there are nice girls out there, and even the all younger ones are not about the money.  And while it is understandable that most will just assume an older guy with a younger girl is all a scam, and that might even be true most of the time, it’s certainly not always true.  

 

My my girl has a few weaknesses to go with her many strengths.  Despite the smoking body her face is more exotic than beautiful.  Perhaps not to everyone’s taste, and as I mentioned early in, not terribly attractive to Thais.  But she is a pretty amazing girl, at least in my book.

 

I would not have posted this 2 years or even 1 year ago.  But now, having known her for over two years, I know her well and am pretty secure in this relationship.  Again, it’s the best relationship with zero drama I have ever had.  And, knock wood, it seems to only be getting better.  

 

 

 

 

at the time you first meet her, did she bring friends along to meet you ?  because normal thai woman will not meet strangers alone .

one thing that make surprise that she willing to against her family wishes, because all Thai woman i know  always put her family first.You said you have zero drama ? which i think against the reality that most TW are lack of self esteeem compare to western woman esp on emotional stability, i think your GF are at the same age as mine  which contrary to your stories are having lack emotional stability..which maybe make people here get suspicious on your stories

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, 473geo said:

On the other hand you could go through life thinking every Thai woman is a loaded shotgun just waiting for the opportunity to blow away your wallet

I consider it a 'successful relationship' if I get out of it without being stabbed.

[EVENKEEL]

That last pic showed a huge set of mits, yikes. Just saying.

[473geo]

4 hours ago, Sheryl said:

The big risk when someone is that young is that the  personality is not yet fully formed and substantial changes often loom ahead.

 

This is the reason that marriages at young ages have such a high divorce rate. The younger someone is, the more they are likely to change over time and the greater the odds that they will no longer want what they want now.

 

Add to that the changes you will undergo as you age - she is reacting to you as you are now, how she will feel when she's still young and healthy in her 30's-40's  and you are an old man may be another matter.

 

 

 

 

You bring into the equation that two young people are almost certain to change. An older man may well be comfortable with himself, and not change radically over the coming years, he may now be successfully funded, potential financial challenges for a younger couple may never surface. Maybe the young lady is savvy enough to be with someone who is not a drain on her limited resources?

 

Maybe she sees her friends 'buying' what she can have for free?

 

 

Edited March 10, 2018 by 473geo

[theguyfromanotherforum]

1 hour ago, 473geo said:

You bring into the equation that two young people are almost certain to change. An older man may well be comfortable with himself, and not change radically over the coming years, he may now be successfully funded, 

 

I think he's a TEFLER

[theguyfromanotherforum]

1 hour ago, EVENKEEL said:

That last pic showed a huge set of mits, yikes. Just saying.

 

What are mits? Can someone help me here? 

[theguyfromanotherforum]

1 hour ago, EVENKEEL said:

That last pic showed a huge set of mits, yikes. Just saying.

 

What are mits? Can someone help me here? 

[473geo]

3 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

What are mits? Can someone help me here? 

Hands

[Kadilo]

21 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

What are mits? Can someone help me here? 

Hand...as opposed to thrupenny bits which are tits. 

[MaeJoMTB]

9 hours ago, Kadilo said:

Hand...as opposed to thrupenny bits which are tits. 

We won't go into what 'halfpenny' means.

[faraday]

39 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

We won't go into what 'halfpenny' means.

Or 'sixpence, half a crown'.

 

[simoh1490]

I met a girl who was substantially younger than me, she was 24 and I was 54, I never planned to be in a relationship with someone of that age it just happened. We're still together fifteen years later and it worked out much more than just fine. She's free to leave with my blessing if her needs change and she knows that, if that happened I would be very very happy for her plus she gets to keep the house I bought/we share regardless. In those fifteen years, she's got a degree, she's been able to experiment with careers, she's travelled (with me) and she's learned languages - I'm her safety net which empowers her more than if I wasn't around. She has always worked ever since we've known each other, she has friends her age and she mixes well with my friends, many of whom are our friends. I'm now 68 and she's 38, if I left and went back home to the UK tomorrow her level of income and standard of living wouldn't change one iota but she would have her freedom but she refuses to entertain the concept. For those of you doubting it can work or who think it's a bad thing, we're proof that it can work very well to the benefit of all parties and is capable of being a better option than some of the alternatives in Thailand.

[GoDucks]

20 minutes ago, simoh1490 said:

I met a girl who was substantially younger than me, she was 24 and I was 54, I never planned to be in a relationship with someone of that age it just happened. We're still together fifteen years later and it worked out much more than just fine. She's free to leave with my blessing if her needs change and she knows that, if that happened I would be very very happy for her plus she gets to keep the house I bought/we share regardless. In those fifteen years, she's got a degree, she's been able to experiment with careers, she's travelled (with me) and she's learned languages - I'm her safety net which empowers her more than if I wasn't around. She has always worked ever since we've known each other, she has friends her age and she mixes well with my friends, many of whom are our friends. I'm now 68 and she's 38, if I left and went back home to the UK tomorrow her level of income and standard of living wouldn't change one iota but she would have her freedom but she refuses to entertain the concept. For those of you doubting it can work or who think it's a bad thing, we're proof that it can work very well to the benefit of all parties and is capable of being a better option than some of the alternatives in Thailand.

I know this is exactly how our situation began, and I certainly hope this is how our situation is and will become.

Thanks for sharing this.  

[GoDucks]

11 hours ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

I think he's a TEFLER

You think I teach English?  OK.  Up to you.  Its a tough job and the pay is not very good.  I do not envy those guys, but I also do not look down on them.  

[GoDucks]

12 hours ago, 473geo said:

You bring into the equation that two young people are almost certain to change. An older man may well be comfortable with himself, and not change radically over the coming years, he may now be successfully funded, potential financial challenges for a younger couple may never surface. Maybe the young lady is savvy enough to be with someone who is not a drain on her limited resources?

 

Maybe she sees her friends 'buying' what she can have for free?

 

 

Quite frankly, her friends, most of which I know quite well now, get far more from their Thai bf and several kik (while they are still trolling farang on Tinder).

 

[GoDucks]

14 hours ago, NonthaburiBear said:

at the time you first meet her, did she bring friends along to meet you ?  because normal thai woman will not meet strangers alone .

one thing that make surprise that she willing to against her family wishes, because all Thai woman i know  always put her family first.You said you have zero drama ? which i think against the reality that most TW are lack of self esteeem compare to western woman esp on emotional stability, i think your GF are at the same age as mine  which contrary to your stories are having lack emotional stability..which maybe make people here get suspicious on your stories

She met me alone, in a mall Starbucks.  We did not leave the mall in that first meeting.  She was unbelievably shy.  And I had absolutely no intention of beginning any long-term relationship with her (or anyone) at that time.

She had a foreign online BF for nearly 2 years whom she never met, from 16 until after we met and started dating.

She, like many Thai girls, has some self esteem issues.  She is always worried I am going to "find a girl better than" she is.  I tell her... I have been in plenty of relationships and I know a great thing when I see it.  I am not looking.  But, if she feels its time to move on (and I often mention that in 20 years she will be relatively young and I will be pretty old) she can and should.  And if that does, indeed happen, because I do want the best for her, I will wish her the very best.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

7 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

You think I teach English?  OK.  Up to you.  Its a tough job and the pay is not very good.  I do not envy those guys, but I also do not look down on them.  

 

I dunno.....I see a 30sqf condo, so I assume.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

7 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

Quite frankly, her friends, most of which I know quite well now, get far more from their Thai bf and several kik (while they are still trolling farang on Tinder).

 

 

Some friends.

 

And she's a good girl, right.

[GoDucks]

13 hours ago, EVENKEEL said:

That last pic showed a huge set of mits, yikes. Just saying.

Yes she has big hands.  And big feet, too (for a Thai girl anyway).  And, as I mentioned, she is 173 cm.  Her sister, who is a Tom, is taller than she is.

She is not perfect, nor is she the typical "cute" asian girl.  

[GoDucks]

1 minute ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

I dunno.....I see a 30sqf condo, so I assume.

LOL its a 57 m2 condo that I own (after giving my ex wife our two other houses) 50 m from a BTS station.  

:)

I am not rich, but i dare say I am better off than 95% of TV folks.  Does not make me better than any of you, just perhaps luckier.

[GoDucks]

2 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Some friends.

 

And she's a good girl, right.

Define "good girl".

All I can tell you is that after two years there are no issues at all about trust.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

4 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

Define "good girl".

All I can tell you is that after two years there are no issues at all about trust.

 

I dunno. The more you talk the more things are starting to creep up.

 

Personally I'd have left this thread after the first pic.

[GoDucks]

1 hour ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

I dunno. The more you talk the more things are starting to creep up.

 

Personally I'd have left this thread after the first pic.

I am obviously OK in discussing this relationship as... i am the OP.  It has been interesting to hear the other perspectives, humorous to hear the haters, and reassuring to hear the similar success stories.

And she loves to wear bikinis.  One of her faults is she is a bit obsessed with her body and weight--she was pretty heavy (70 kg) until the beginning of M6.  Now she watches her weight and diet religiously.

And because I know u guys just love it when I post her pic... (obvious sarcasm) here is another one.  

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, GoDucks said:

She had a foreign online BF for nearly 2 years whom she never met, from 16 until after we met and started dating.

You seemed confused about the definition of boyfriend/relationship.

Boyfriend = someone who gets to handle the goods on a regular basis 'without making a purchase' (not chatting online).

Relationship = living with someone.

 

Some of your opinions seem a little strange/naive/immature for a grown man 50+ years old.

[GoDucks]

2 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

You seemed confused about the definition of boyfriend/relationship.

Boyfriend = someone who gets to handle the goods on a regular basis 'without making a purchase' (not chatting online).

Relationship = living with someone.

 

Some of your opinions seem a little strange/naive/immature for a grown man 50+ years old.

LOL its just terminology, brother.  Get over yourself.  I was actually using her's.  And, unless you can show me some definition in an official text it ain't set in stone, either.  I know many people who would flat-out disagree with your definitions.

 

Edited March 11, 2018 by GoDucks

[MaeJoMTB]

2 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

 I know many people who would flat-out disagree with your definitions.

But none of them would be grown men.

[GoDucks]

2 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

But none of them would be grown men.

LOL no not true at all.

Again, get over yourself.

For instance, many people are in committed relationships without living together.  Ask, for instance, any Clinical Psychologist.

 

Edited March 11, 2018 by GoDucks

[theguyfromanotherforum]

11 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

I am obviously OK in discussing this relationship as... i am the OP.  It has been interesting to hear the other perspectives, humorous to hear the haters, and reassuring to hear the similar success stories.

And she loves to wear bikinis.  One of her faults is she is a bit obsessed with her body and weight--she was pretty heavy (70 kg) until the beginning of M6.  Now she watches her weight and diet religiously.

And because I know u guys just love it when I post her pic... (obvious sarcasm) here is another one.  

 

Thanks. I downloaded them all.

[GoDucks]

1 minute ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Thanks. I downloaded them all.

She has these and more on her Instagram.

Thai girls....